For as long as I can remember, I've loved flipping through photos. It seems that I have been very lively since I was a child, and I was able to climb on top of my brother at the age of three to pluck his woollen curls, but he never said anything about my bad deeds in the past.

The people I see the most are people in white coats, wearing masks, facing needles and drops every day, and doctors who can't see their expressions, crying at first, but then I found out that it was just a moment of insertion into the blood vessel, so then I became numb.

I've never been to the outside world, the villas and farms are huge, the Provence lavande is full of gardens, the Baroque promenades and pavilions, the angel statue fountain, and the snow-white sheep, the red horses, the snow-white horses, beautiful and elegant. But for me, it was empty and lonely. My brother is at the age of middle school and needs to stay at school, and Daddy and Mommy are very busy, and they only have birthdays when they see each other.

All people should

By chance, I forgot when I was out of the manor, and I saw blonde children playing on the street, the kindergarten organized outings, wearing uniform suspender pants and sundresses, no needles, no doctors, no large living rooms.

I felt helpless and lost until Mr. Butler found me and took me back.

"Mr. Butler, why are others like this?" I asked.

He didn't answer me.

I still noticed that I was different from the people around me.

I began to be afraid of the way people around me looked at me.

I noticed that they all looked at each other strangely, no matter who it was.

Until......

"Joyeuse anniversaire!" Mommy brought back a pear-shaped box, and I knew it was the violin, Mommy's best instrument, and when she had free time, Mommy would play the violin and play the piano ensemble with Daddy.

Daddy is a burly Chinese with a very resolute face, deep black eyes, and good-looking facial features. I don't remember exactly, but I'm just remembering it through the photos.

“Maman。 Pour moi?" [French: Mommy, give it to me?] I asked.

“Oui， ma chérie。 [French: Yes, dear.] Mommy is a very beautiful woman in my memory, with deep three-dimensional facial features, curly black hair, in my heart, even Venus Medical [Venus: The god of beauty in Greek mythology. Nor can I compare it to her.

I tried my best, but I couldn't hold the violin properly.

“Chérie，Je vais t'apprendre à jouer du violon， quand tu grandiras。 "French: My dear, when you grow up, I will teach you to play the violin. 】

I made an agreement with her, but she repented.

When Daddy Mommy took me on vacation to Marseille [Marseille: France's second largest city and largest seaport]......

The tires suddenly burst, the car went out of control, Mommy blocked me with her body, and all that remained in my memory was the blood on Mommy's forehead, the broken glass on Daddy's body, and the endless darkness in front of my eyes......

Since then...... I don't have Mommy Daddy in my life anymore.

I vaguely remember that a man in a black suit had a suicide note the following year......

I had autism, and I was speechless at one point, and I frantically attacked everyone who came near me, even my brother.

At that time, I had less and less time to see my brother.

My brother recalls that I liked to squat alone with lavender or fish......

The doctor wanted to give me a tranquilizer, but he didn't allow it, so he fed me the medicine himself, and I bit him.

It's just that...... I don't even remember.

Grandpa came from China.

I heard the familiar melody, the tune Mommy often played: Remembrance of Love.

“Shelly，Je t'apprendre àjouer du violon。 "[French: Shelly, I'll teach you to play the violin.] 】

At that time, I cried after a long period of speechlessness......

I was taken to China, started using chopsticks, started eating rice, started talking Chinese......

Slowly, my mood became better.

"Grandpa, is this for me?" I received a shrunken violin, delicate and small, I could afford it.

It happened to be my sixth birthday.

Three years later, I came to the hospital again, covering my grandfather's head with a white cloth, and that was the last time I saw him.

White has become the color I hate the most......

At the time I wrote this, I was fifteen years old and was studying in China.