So, when piano lessons resumed, she still wanted me to start with music theory, and I also hoped that she would simplify the complexity, and I told her that it was difficult for me to remember anything other than what was in the books. She summarized a set of simple introductions to music theory, and through visual metaphors and serious explanations, I had a preliminary understanding of music theory. I told her that she spoke very well and that she would be a good teacher if she were a teacher – and she did become a teacher in the end. She drew staves and notes on paper, and told me that the space between the line and the line, and that for each step up, one note higher, and what an eighth note was, what a quarter note was, and what the seven letters from A to G represented. Tell me about the whole chromatic relationship between the high and low registers, the white and white keys, and the white and black keys on the keyboard. The first song I played was "Little Star".

"Learning almost any instrument, the first capital is this. She said, "And 'Ode to Joy.'"

I played "Little Star" 70 times before I mastered my fingering. It's not because of how difficult it is, "Little Star" has the same time value for each note, except for the last note of each sentence, the rhythm is exactly the same.

"Simple like a snail on your pop-up sill. "The reason why you have been practicing for so long is because you can build a relationship with the piano," she said. ”

Yingxiu's first visit to me was three months after the horrific hurricane, when the girl next door hadn't moved in and the yard was sparsely populated. I was the only resident on the entire second floor, and there were three families downstairs, one was the old man who was deaf and could only hear his own voice, and the other two were two families. One of them was noisy all day long, and the sound seemed to knock down the kapok trees in the yard. Yingxiu was startled the first time he came, he walked around the yard and was almost hit by an iron spoon flying out of that room, Yingxiu was so frightened that he ran upstairs and told me about the unfair treatment of his neighbors. I can faintly hear the voice of love every night on the second floor, and the two moved away when Yingxiu visited me for the second time.

Yingxiu didn't say hello before visiting me for the third time. One Sunday afternoon at four o'clock, the girl next door and I practiced "Happy or Sad" in my house. Yingxiu strode past my door, then turned back to mine before I could see that it was him. I was surprised by Yingxiu's sudden appearance.

"Have you changed houses? have you changed over here?" said Yingxiu standing in the doorway, "May I come in and talk?"

I asked him in, and he asked me directly who the girl in my room was, and I told her that it was my friend, who rented it next door, and her name was Qiu Pei. I introduced the two of them to each other, and Yingxiu took the initiative to shake her hand, and then sat on the edge of my bed, hunched over and looking at the ground without saying a word. I asked him why he was sullen, and he said nothing and let me continue playing my piano. Qiu Pei was thoughtful and told me that she needed to rest, so she went back to her room. I asked again what was wrong with Yingxiu, I had been in the city for more than a year and had never seen him so decadent. He occasionally stood up and paced around my room, he was even thinner, his whole body, as well as his arms and legs, seemed to be made of bamboo poles, his cheekbones protruded, and his eye sockets were deep.

"Lend me some money. He said, "It's very urgent." ”

His state made me very suspicious of what he was borrowing money for, he was never bothered by money things, he stayed in the city for five years, gained valuable experience in his own industry, and was paid well. When I first came to this city, I was grateful for the financial and personal help that helped me a lot. I tried to look in my memory for when he had been in this state, from the three years of high school to the year he came to the city, and everything I could think of pointed to it for nothing. When he lifted his face again, the whimpering look in his eyes made me feel familiar, against the axis of time, and I remembered that I had seen this look in the mirror of my dorm room—my own eyes—accompanied by the final break with Hai Linlin. Almost identical.

At that moment, I didn't need Yingxiu to speak again, I knew what situation he was in, he was deep in the maze of himself, it was difficult to get out, and no one would take him out. I felt that I thought that the world was unpredictable, and that everything would fade away with time and place. With that hurricane called "Linlin", I remembered a lot of things, but after the hurricane, I also felt that the hurricane hung up everything, but in the end it turned out to be completely self-defeating.

I never asked him again why he borrowed money, and I knew he would hide his own things like I had hidden everything from him. But he didn't know that I had gone through unspeakable pain before he did, and had discovered his secret like a thief. I asked him how much he borrowed, and he said he borrowed 5,000. Five thousand was half of all my savings, but I didn't hesitate in the slightest. I know that there are some things that I can't ask, let alone persuade, I can only support them, until the other party's bitter fruit is in their stomachs and they feel that the years are empty, and the story can end and disappear.

I lent him five thousand dollars, and we came out of the bank together, and he thanked me. I saw the whimpering look in his eyes again, and it dawned on me that I had agreed to lend him money not out of understanding, but out of sympathy for him – and for myself.

Then I learned the truth of the matter, and I regretted lending money to Ziyingxiu, and deeply blamed myself for not entering the responsibility of a friend out of sympathy for myself, and let him jump into the abyss from which he will never recover. The process and result of the matter are unexpected, Yingxiu falls in love with a shopping guide in a clothing store, this business-based Pingshui encounter is destined to be a deformed love from the beginning, and Yingxiu will always act as the ultimate victim. I've only seen that shopping guide once, Yingxiu and her had a secret relationship, all emotions are out of two points: Yingxiu is out of love, and the girl is out of materialism. On the first day the two met, Yingxiu bought a lipstick worth 400 yuan for the girl, and Yingxiu left this lipstick lip-shaped mark on her neck that night, but in fact, they didn't do anything. Day after day, the girl kept shopping, and Yingxiu kept paying the bills. And, the girl said to Yingxiu herself: "Love me, prove it with money." ”

Before that, I had always thought that Yingxiu was smart and sensible, and that he would see through everything that was hidden beneath the surface. During my time with him, I knew of his cynicism in matters between men and women, and I was even more convinced that he would not fall into the swamp of taboos between men and women. As far as I can remember, he had brought at least four women with different faces back to the place where he was staying, and for the first time, I was quite embarrassed as a guest staying overnight and excused myself to go out. Two hours later, I estimated that the time was almost up, and when I opened the door, the sound of his bedroom was still ringing.

"You don't have to shy away. Once, after his acquaintance left, he said, "There is no need to avoid the things that everyone wants to do, as long as you can't see them." ”

He felt that love was just a short-lived temporary favor, and that the attraction between men and women only happened in a moment and ended in a moment. And claim that people who suffer for love are too naïve, if you really think that love is important, then please die for love, so as to be great. He always likes dewy love, everything feels like it, no woman has ever suffered for him, and he has never suffered for any woman until the shopping guide appears. On the night of the rainstorm one day, the two stayed at Yingxiu's residence, and the shopping guide stripped naked and lay on Yingxiu's bed.

"Come on, pretty boy. She said, "You've spent so much money to climb up." ”

There were many women in that bed, some for several nights, some for only one night, and some for less than an hour. Everything seemed to be a breeze, but Yingxiu was indifferent. Since that night, Yingxiu has gradually become decadent, and he himself knows that this situation will not last long, and his money will eventually run out one day, but he will fall deeper and deeper. One day, the shopping guide gave Yingxiu an ultimatum, she abandoned Yingxiu without buying her a single-shot camera, and Yingxiu came to my residence and asked me to borrow 5,000 yuan. That DSLR camera cost fifteen thousand.