In the year 1010 of the solar calendar, February 144.

Far north, Qingcheng.

Under the inclination of the brilliant sunlight of spring, through the layers of leaf shadows, and under the gentle caress of the breeze, what was originally a moment of calm waves should be an extremely ordinary scene called one of the countless fragments of daily life.

It was a teenager sitting on a street corner with no power.

It should be an ordinary teenager, that is, a teenager who will not attract anyone's attention, who should not make himself look at it more, a teenager without any characteristics, to ask why.

After just surviving the cold winter, the exposed skin was full of red spots after chilblains, and it was obvious that it was not easy to have a cold winter before. The ordinary appearance is not clean, and if you want to do the opposite, it is muddy. It had not been taken care of in a long time, and it was so long that it covered the eyes.

Extremely sloppy.

He doesn't look like a young man at all, but if there is still a trace of tenderness, he will never fall into this step.

It's just that there is no cultivation.

In today's world, the number of people begging is very small, very small, or even rare. As long as there is a trace of cultivation, you can feed your family without worrying about food and clothing, although you will not be too rich, but you will never be reduced to the step of begging.

Therefore, most of the beggars in this world are old people who have no parents, are still immature children, and have no children under their knees.

Most people are lonely, but it is much easier to support themselves than to support their families, so as long as they can gather aura, they have the capital to live.

It's hard to understand why this young man is so decadent.

The godless eyes are full of dead silence, always reminiscent of a lifeless abyss, which is like despairing of the world, marking the end of one's life, making people cold and sad, just want to stay away from this young man who exudes tragedy.

It's not that there is a flood of sympathy, on the contrary, there is no real feeling of empathy, some just want to stay away from such a decadent aura, for no other reason than that this aura breaks his own sage mentality and makes him very uncomfortable, especially a poor person who is like himself and has no cultivation.

So, with this mentality.

I wanted to meet similar examples of myself in this vast and boundless world, which can be regarded as a little comfort to my already dead heart, and it can be regarded as a light like candlelight.

But that's what it looks like.

In my mind, it should be like myself, calm and quiet.

Especially the opposite sex.

It should be as gentle as the spring breeze, as dazzling as summer, as quiet as autumn, and as beautiful as winter.

It shouldn't be like this.

Disappointment is unbearable, and disappointment is also invisible.

should have ignored such a bland teenager, he should have said goodbye, and then he would not have seen him in this life.

This kind of appearance is in line with his indifferent mentality towards everything.

Can...... Why.

The legs don't obey.

What prompted me to stop and stare at the boy was the mentality that made me stop and stare at him? Even now, I can't understand it......

It should be very simple, the pity for one's kind, the act of charity to a stranger of the same age, or because of the first taste of superiority.

I can't understand the mentality of the time.

However, the spring sun was in full bloom that day.

Even though...... The sun was cold.

As I have learned, the sunlight is always cold and spotless.

It may be because of a long period of loneliness, but he thinks that he is a liberation given to him by God. But I think that he may be the only person in the world who can empathize with him.

I don't know if it's all kinds of psychology.,I made an abnormal move.。

Very unusual behavior.

It was the only time in my life, very bold, even after losing my mind.

Standing in front of the lost and depressed young man, his fairy-like posture made the young man's godless eyes appear for the first time like sparkling water, slowly rippling.

So, I asked like him.

"You...... Despair?"

Yes, asked him truthfully himself.

It is not only to prove that the life he is in is real, but also to prove whether he is his own kind.

It's obvious.

But on the side of the road, now one of the endangered beggars.

It's not that rare.

Although there is no pungent smell of dirty smell, he is a teenager who exudes the smell of normal people. Turning his blank eyes, he looked squarely at the comer.

It was undoubtedly a very beautiful thing, like a pure and beautiful daffodil. Just like this spring light, it makes people feel quiet and warm. In the haze, it is like a fairy in the sky. To give oneself liberation, one can't help but give birth to such an illusion.

So, the blank boy nodded.

Actually, it's not despair.

It's just that I want to do this, I want to continue like this. It's not to live comfortably, but simply, to see if you're real, if you really exist in this world.

Now it seems that he really exists in this world. There is no doubt about the result, because the pain experienced today does not allow one to doubt reality.

The more painful it is, the more clearly it can touch the meaning of the so-called existence.

It's not about living for yourself.

It's not as simple as it is today......

And the girl in front of her can dream that even if she is now, she can stretch out her hands to herself, like a fairy who has fallen into the world, so that she can feel that her fate is actually equal. The down-and-out self will also be pitied by heaven. that the self that is full of darkness and falls into the abyss.

I saw it, I saw the light, the dawn of dawn, so warm, so beautiful......

So, I nodded.

I was really desperate.

There is no way to deny it.

I can't deny it.

The woman who was like a daffodil smiled, and it really overshadowed the heavens and the earth, and the scene of spring was ashamed. Like a dreamlike bubble, he stretched out his hand and dissipated in the void.

So, in order to prove his conjecture.

The dirty hands that he stretched out to her.

It was stained hands, touching her cheeks, and under the dazzling light of spring, the delicate skin like mutton fat and warm jade, bloomed with an incomparably dazzling brilliance.

Maybe it's what I've been longing for for a long time. Perhaps it is because the nature of the country is easy to change and difficult to change, and the pride buried deep in his bones does not allow him to give up the good things in front of him. Maybe it's because of the simple lustful psychology.

However, at a certain moment.

You have to keep your hands in the air.

Unreachable.

Why?

At a certain moment, I deeply understood that I was not a teenager in a dream. It's just a beggar with dirty hands, how can he use these dirty hands to touch this dreamlike fairy face.

Although, the woman in front of her is not dodging.

Just staring firmly, staring at his embarrassed self.

How can this be.

Why is the world so unjust?

The eyes that seemed to be looking through the autumn water did not have the slightest intention of dodging, but just wanted, wanted to wait, waited for themselves to touch, it was so simple, with anticipation.

But you can't touch yourself.

Even if it is the last shred of conscience of the stupid wild dog, even if it is to not desecrate this glorious face, even if it is out of inferiority and cannot tolerate its own filth.

Yourself, unable to touch.

The dreamy woman just stared faintly, at the dirty hands that were stuck in the air, ready to caress her cheeks.

Surprisingly, it didn't come to mind with the look of shame and resentment. It's just that they are sad eyes, which I understand and understand from the bottom of my heart.

That is, the look of everything around him that will only be revealed after it is full of dead silence.

It's just like the light in my eyes at the moment.

Waiting for salvation, waiting for salvation from the immortals, giving oneself liberation, away from this hopeless world, wanting to be far away, unable to touch all the good things in this world.

Find out for yourself.

I'm not sure though.

However, I will not be wrong about that gaze.

Yes, she was waiting, waiting for herself to give her salvation, waiting for herself to grant her liberation. Far from the hustle and bustle of the world, it comes from the sublimation of the soul.

She was so longing.

How can I live up to it?

Thereupon.

Those dirty hands always covered the white and immaculate face. The touch that came from the hands, so familiar and unfamiliar, was slippery and warm, as smooth and soft as mutton fat and warm jade.

I don't want to let go, I want eternity.

Forever have this delicate and flawless cheek, want this warmth to be eternal, and want to hug her tightly in the feeling that I can't suppress.

Simply because of her.

It's just too beautiful.

She is a beautiful woman who is elegant enough to accompany her for a lifetime.

It is in the most desperate moment of oneself, even if it is a little warmth given by pity, even if it is because it is only for a moment, the childish conscience is good. Even if it's because you can't get used to looking at your own nest.

She came to her aid.

Although, that was so disgusting.

However, I can't refuse.

So, this time I changed to myself and asked her.

"You...... Despair?"

It's the feeling of a hot, warm, dewy glow sliding onto your hands.

The woman in front of her shed tears of despair. It's so clear and beautiful, and the hazy seems to have returned to the original time, his original intention,

What did you decide to do and fall here?

Isn't it obvious?

That, of course, for eternity.

Eternal, by their side.

For this, separation is essential.

It was like tears in front of me, so holy and clear.

The woman nodded with a delicate head.

This is the most despicable question and answer that cannot be denied. Because, it's obvious, isn't it?

So, the woman gently held the hands that were caressing her cheeks.

This warmth is undoubtedly real.