When every boy grows up, he doesn't like to go out with his parents to a greater or lesser extent. Pen, fun, pavilion www. biquge。 Some are because they don't have a common topic, and some are afraid of their parents' nagging. But Fang Yan's reason for being particularly reluctant to go out with his mother is a little different, he is afraid of embarrassment.

It all started twenty-six years ago, when a single programmer ape came back from abroad, and because he didn't have his own social circle at home, he asked his aunt to introduce him to a partner. At that time, when he went on a blind date for the first time, he was shocked by the domestic atmosphere. So when he saw the sixteen-year-old girl-like appearance of his blind date, he immediately called his aunt and popularized the science that it is illegal to marry or have a relationship with an underage girl. So while he was on the phone, he said sorry to the girl, I was afraid that this blind date was going to end early, and at this time, the girl spoke.

"I'm twenty. The girl said, took out her ID card and slapped it on the table. The man originally thought it was a girl joking with her, but when he picked up his ID card, he found that it was indeed a photo of a girl on it, and she was already in her twenties.

I originally said to my aunt that I wanted her to introduce a new blind date to the man.,Looking at the woman who is obviously twenty years old.,But it's exactly the same appearance as a fifteen or sixteen-year-old girl.,Although there was no Lolita control in that era.,But a certain hobby in the man's heart was also stirred.。

The next plot is that the man decided that this woman was going to be his wife, and then in that era when Lori control was scarce and there were basically no competitors, he finally caught up with the girl and got married and had children. This man is Fang Yang's father, and the woman is Fang Yang's mother.

Two years after Fang's father and Fang's mother got married, Fang Yan was born, and his tragic voice began. Not to mention that because Fang's mother became a mother relatively early, she won't take care of dialects, just talking about other people's speculations about the relationship between the two, dialects want to run away from home a little.

When Fang Yan was five years old, Fang's mother went out with Fangyan, and when others saw Fangyan and Fang's mother, they would ask Fangyan, "Lead the children of relatives around." Then Fang's mother nodded decisively, not even refuting. At that time, Fang's mother was already twenty-seven years old, but she looked like an eighteen-year-old girl who had just entered college.

By the time Fang Yan was ten years old, Fang's mother's appearance age had barely reached twenty years old. When others see Fang's mother leading the dialect on the road, they will step forward and ask kindly, this is your nephew.

Nephew, your sister, I don't know if this is my mother. When I was a child, I was more sensitive to dialects, and I couldn't wait to tell anyone who was passing by that this was his mother, and that he was not a motherless child. Because at that time, the children in the class would often say in dialect, "Why is it your little aunt who picks you up, are you without a mother?" ”

No mother, this is a malicious mockery of a child. And how Fang Yan hopes that one day on the road, people will treat him and Fang's mother as relatives. However, this wish was soon fulfilled when the dialect was fifteen years old.

When Fang Yan was fifteen years old, Fang's mother's real age was almost forty years old, and her appearance age was also twenty-five years old.

Therefore, when Fang Yan and Fang's mother go out, everyone usually asks Fang's mother, "Is this your brother?"

And Fang's mother also nodded shamelessly and said yes, and then touched Fang Yan's head to show intimacy. During that time, many of Fang Yan's classmates would envy Fang Yan for having such a young sister, and the friends who Fang Yan knew to play ball, the older ones, after seeing Fang's mother, suddenly became very good at Fang Yan, not only became more gentle on the court, but also took the initiative to buy water for Fang Yan after playing.

Just when Fang Yan was confused and wondered if this group of people was a, these people would secretly come over to Fang Yan and ask, "Does your sister have a boyfriend?"

Yes, and I know each other well!

Marrying Fang's mother is definitely the most bragging thing in Fang's father's life. In that era when Lolita control was scarce, Fang's father abducted Fang's mother as a returnee, although he didn't get ahead after returning to China, and he was basically messing around, but people who don't know Fang's father generally think that Fang's father is a successful person.

The reason lies with Fang's mother.

Fang's father is a person who looks more vicissitudes, he doesn't look old, he is an uncle's face. When Fang Yan was fifteen years old, Fang's father basically looked like a forty-five or sixteen person, and every time Fang's father led Fang's mother and his wife to go shopping, shopping, and eating hand in hand. After being seen by Fang's father's customers or friends who are not very familiar with them, these people will ask: Is this your daughter?

At this time, Fang's father would shake his hand vigorously, and then proudly said, "This is my daughter-in-law." ”

Suddenly, these people looked up at Fang's father's eyes, just like looking up at a big boss worth more than 100 million. After all, for any man, being able to marry a daughter of the same age is definitely the biggest of the bigwigs. And this situation became more common after the matter of milk tea and Qiangdong spread all over the country.

People who know Fang's father talk about Fang's father when they blow the criticism at the wine table. It's basically like this: Whoever I know has found a little wife who has just graduated from college, and that is called a winner in life.

Of course, Fang's father was proud for so many years, and a few years later, when Fang Yan was eighteen years old, the wind of makeup, one of the four major evil arts in Asia, began to blow into China, and after Fang's mother learned to make up, the situation was different.

Before makeup didn't spread on a large scale, even a trend-loving lady like Fang's mother only used cosmetics to take care of her skin. Later, because Fang's mother looked young, she couldn't play with middle-aged women of the same age, and she was all mixed with the new young people in the unit, so she learned makeup through a girl who liked cos.

After Fang's mother mastered the basic makeup ability in just one week, and then even if it was only the most basic makeup ability, Fang's mother could use about half an hour to make Fang's mother, who was actually in her forties and looked in her twenties, become a little girl hovering around her twenties.

Then from then on, after Fang's father and Fang's mother went out, everyone would smile and say, 'Your father-daughter relationship is so good', 'Yo, your daughters are so old'

Fang's father actually wanted to explain, but Fang's mother loves to play so much, so she called people uncle sweetly, and then these uncles also regarded Fang's mother as a junior and took care of them very much. During the Chinese New Year that year, Fang's father's customers came to visit the New Year at home, and the red envelopes were given in two copies, one for dialect and one for Fang's mother.

Then after giving the red envelope, he also asked Fang's father. "Your children are very beautiful, and their mother must be a big beauty."

Fang's Dad: 。。。。。

Of course, this is a blow to Fang's father after Fang's mother learned to put on makeup, and for Fangyan, it simply created a legendary story passed down from generation to generation of students in a dialect school, so that Fang Yan almost didn't dare to admit that he was a student of this school after graduation.

Fang Yan is eighteen years old, and the third year of high school is close to the college entrance examination, because it is rumored that the questions will be difficult that year, so the pressure on Fang Yan is a bit great. Fang's mother feels sorry for her son, and every week she will come to the school in Fang Yan to invite Fang Yan to have a delicious meal, and then watch a movie or something.

And that time happened to be the time when everyone rarely went home, and Saturdays and Sundays were in school to make up classes, and the dialect was excellent in sports, so I knew a lot of people.

After coming and going, within a few weeks, the alumni who knew Fang Yan had basically met Fang Ma and Fang Yan who had an intimate meal and watched a movie together.

Because of the third year of high school, everyone has very little communication, so even if many people saw Fang Yan and Fang Ma eating and watching movies together, it happened that during that time, Fang Ma had to put on makeup every time she went out, and forcibly made her age about the same as Fang Yan.

So much so that many people who are not familiar with the dialect regard Fang's mother as the girlfriend of the dialect. This also led to many girls who wanted to confess to the dialect during the stressful period of the third year of high school and get through the difficulties together one after another.

After all, the pressure is already high enough, and if the confession is rejected again, then it won't be a matter of not living.

Later, after the end of the senior high school exam, a girl who was a little silly and cute on weekdays came over to find Fang Yan and told Fang Yan what she was going to confess to Fang Yan.

Of course, what made the dialect a legend later was not the confession of many girls who missed it, but the next thing. If time could be reclocked, Fang Yan would definitely not have explained too much about this silly and cute girl back then.

The situation was like this at the time, although Fang Yan didn't have the idea of dating this silly girl, but Fang Yan still explained that the girl who had been eating and watching movies with him was actually his mother, not his girlfriend.

But then I don't know if there was a problem with the hurried interpretation of the dialect at that time, or if there was a problem with the understanding of this silly cute girl. After the college entrance examination, when Fang Yan went back to school to get the college entrance examination volunteer book, he found that there were many people who knew him pointing at him and saying something to others.

Dialect seems to have become a celebrity overnight.

A puzzled dialect went to the office to get his volunteer book, and a male teacher who had played with dialect before suddenly came over and asked dialect cordially how many points he scored in the college entrance examination.

Fang Yan told the male teacher his score, and the male teacher was very pleased and said, this score is okay, I originally said that you didn't do well in the exam because of your family's affairs.

What's going on at home? Fang Yan asked the male teacher in confusion what exactly he asked for. The male teacher was embarrassed to answer, but he couldn't stand the dialect several times, so he said, "I have a student who said that you talked about a girlfriend in high school, and ended up being your stepmother. Although I have only seen this kind of thing on TV, I didn't expect it to happen in reality. You must adjust your mentality, after all, maybe that girl and your dad are true love. ”

It's true love!

Fang Yan immediately understood what the problem was.

Later, after many inquiries, the dialect was understood. The silly and cute girl before made up what he said to her mother, Fang's mother was originally Fangyan's girlfriend, and then Fang's father snatched love, and finally became Fang's mother.

And because the time when the dialect was discovered was too late, various magical versions of the rumors have also spread in the school, among which there are dialects Fang's mother who really loves each other, and Fang's father took away Fang's mother in order to learn the dialect well. Fang's mother approached the dialect in order to marry Fang's father and other bloody plots.

The dialect that has been looking forward to being famous suddenly became a legend of the school with the assistance of Fang's mother, and the legendary story will be passed on from mouth to mouth in the mouths of previous students.

Fang Yan, who was originally interested in applying for a local university, swore at that moment that he would go to a university in another place to die!

In the end, in Fang's mother's reluctant eyes, she applied for a university in a second-tier city on the northern coast.

When Fang Yan was in college, Huaxia was the time when the wave of uncles was rising, and Fang Yan learned to play music, guitar and bass in order to facilitate pickling girls, and began to develop his image in the direction of uncles.

His hair was long and down to his ears, he was almost able to braid his hair, and his beard was unkempt, and he looked like a wild man coming out of the mountains.

But that was the most popular image of a boy at that time, and Fang Yan also relied on this appearance to kill all sides among the girls, and the waves were not good, and then one day Fang's mother called Fang Yan and said that she had arrived in the city where Fang Yan was.

When Fang Yan went to see his father and mother with a sense of the vicissitudes of the world, he saw Fang's mother standing at the school gate, wearing a Republic of China student uniform, and looked younger than Fang Yan after putting on makeup.

As soon as Fang Yan asked, she found out that Fang's mother didn't come to see her at all, but was invited by the young lady who taught her makeup before to come over to be a board girl for the Comic Con. Fang Yan just wanted to say Mom, you are in your forties, and there is still a childlike heart to accompany a group of teenage children to do a comic exhibition, and several of Fang Yan's roommates suddenly came out of the school and prepared to form a group to go to the Internet café to open the black, and happened to see Fang Yan and Fang Ma.

A few roommates were family members who knew the dialect and wanted to come, but they didn't know who it was.

Several roommates of Fang Yan saw Fang's mother, who was cute and cute, wearing a Republic of China student uniform and keeping her sister's head, and then looked at Fang Yan's intimate appearance with Fang's mother, so they all came over and said to Fang Yan, "Fang Yan, this is your sister." ”

It's your sister, that's my mother!

Fang Yan just wanted to explain, took out the mobile phone screen and looked at his vicissitudes of life, and then looked at it, Fang's mother was only twenty years old after makeup, and in the end, she was my mother who didn't say it.

Otherwise, it is estimated that the story of the dialect that was circulated in high school will be recirculated in college.

Although Fang Yan later gave up the uncle style, in those years, people kept saying that Fang Ma was Fang Yan's sister, which made Fang Yan quite hit. And what's even more annoying is that Fang's mother was obsessed with cosplay during that time, of course, she won't have that kind of meaty cos, but even so, the photos taken are still very many people look at them after retouching, and Fang's mother also requires that the dialect space be filled with his photos.

For this reason, Fang Yan also specially asked Fang's father to ask my mother, so that you are not worried. But Fang's father smiled with honey, and then said, "Your mother is out of cos, and the photographer has always been me, so I have nothing to worry about." Besides, since your mom learned to play cos, there are new outfits every once in a while, and my life has been a lot better. ”

Sexual bliss...

Dog abuse!

Fang's father has a very classic saying, that is, our Fang family will always have only one baby, and that is your mother.

Indeed, because Fang's mother is very young, she always plays with young people, which leads to Fang's mother's mentality is also very young.

Isn't it good to have a young mother, thinking that in addition to being a mother for you, she can also play with you and be friends with you.

But the dialect wants to say a good hair. Fang's mother is a baby, and Fang Yan has become a grass on the side of the road, not only to endure the reduction of family status, but also to endure Fang's mother's various unreliable care when he was a child.

Fang Yan felt that it was a miracle that he could grow up so safely.

The first unreliable memory of Fang Fang's mother came when he was eight years old.

When Fang Yan was eight years old, one day because of the school holiday, Fang's father was not there, so Fang Yan followed Fang's mother to Fang's mother's unit and accompanied Fang's mother to work.

When I was a child, I spoke in a good dialect, I didn't cry or make trouble, I just sat there quietly and read. Then looking at it, as soon as Fang Yan looked up, he saw Fang's mother eating a bag of potato chips.

By the time the dialect passed, Fang's mother had already finished eating a bag of potato chips, and then when she licked her fingers, she found the dialect coming over and was shocked.

The expression, as if to say, "Why is my son here?" ”

If it is an unreliable mother, after letting her child find out that she is stealing food, she will compensate the child. But Fang's mother is not ordinary and unreliable.

As a big baby, Fang's mother didn't feel that it was a sin to steal potato chips with a tongue that was still a little baby on her back, and after wiping her hands clean, Fang's mother ignored the eight-year-old tongue with saliva and started working!

How can that dialect work, immediately pulled his throat, cried and hugged his mother to ask for delicious food. Until now, Fang Yan didn't know whether Fang's mother at that time had indeed finished the snack or was reluctant to give it to her son.

Anyway, she did something that Fang Yan still can't forgive.

ps:The extra words are in the author's words every day.,Genuine subscription readers can see it.。 Then if there are iOS readers who can't see it, they can read it on the web, or wait for a while (time is uncertain) to post a single chapter of the collection.