The sharp eyes found that the bandage wrapped around Fengno's right wrist oozed new blood, and her sister Tokitsuki Yukino reproached with an expression that didn't know whether it was anger or sadness: "Sister, you are ...... again"

“……”

When Kaze Nai was said this, he put on a look as if he had just discovered it now, staring at the bandage on his wrist with an expressionless face, and then glanced at Yukino, and passed through the living room with an expression that nothing had happened. Pen? Interesting? Pavilion wWw. ｂiquge。 ｉｎfo

That's right, she cut her wrists again. Driven by insecurity, I cut my wrists.

It's about identifying yourself with blood and pain. If you don't do this, you can't live.,It seems that a human being who is not punished has no qualifications to live.。

Kazeno kept thinking about death, she had to think.

To live is pain. The masochist crouches down to accept the pain, while the sadist becomes angry at the pain and turns to cause pain to others. It's ugly to live, and it's even uglier to die. And a living person who constantly thinks about death, the closest thing to stupidity and reality is the ugliest.

With an indifferent expression on his face, Kazeno changed into the clothes he usually wore and walked to the entrance. My parents and sister were sitting at the big table eating. No one asked her where she was going, no one asked her if she had eaten, and no one reminded her that it was incorrect to go out on a night outing. Kaze Nai's parents were watching TV while chatting about common topics in their daily lives, ignoring Kaze Nao who was standing in their sight. Yukino just looked at Kazeno's wrist with a worried expression.

As always.

Kazeno changed his shoes in the hallway and walked out of the house. Tonight's moon is frighteningly round, glowing with an ethereal silver glow. And under the moonlight, the night looks even darker. Kazeno's clothes and the night are one and inseparable. It felt like a slow fall from a tall building.

The reason why Kazeno likes to wear Gothic clothes is because it looks like a beautiful shroud.

It could even be said that she was deeply fascinated by it. Decorated with the costume of the ugly deceased, she felt as if she was surrounded by death, making her feel like a cold corpse, and she felt a sense of peace.

Kazuna's grandfather feared that if she continued like this, she would fall into hell, so he kept beating her with a stick. Originally, he was still a kind person, but then he became more and more strict. In the end, it was because Feng Nai's behavior was too out of line that his grandfather's temper became irritable. Or is it because of the influence of the new order, and grandpa is gradually losing his mind?

It's all looping. The grandfather, who received the mission, decided to rid the demon of Kazeno's body, and continued to destroy Kazeno's body. After getting the experience of imminent death again and again, Feng Nai denied his existence more and more, and did more and more things that made his grandfather angry. Enraged, Grandpa had no choice but to go to the Order for guidance and redemption after beating Kazeno.

Circulating.

Until one of the links suddenly collapsed. The collapse of one point also led to the destruction of the entire loop. Grandpa died, and the Emerging Order was discovered by the police and destroyed. And Kazeno himself is also in it to self-obliterate important things.

Grandpa finally died in a state like hell on earth. Did he go to Elysium? Is there a way to know? Kazeno always thought so.

After all, the answer is buried in the heart of the grandfather, and the grandfather is buried in the depths of death after all. Sulfona still wandered the deserted streets, walking in the cold wind of midnight, and came to her grandfather's courtyard. The Japanese-style garden is filled with a dead air due to the loss of its owner, which is just right for the presence of Tokitsuki Kazeno.

In fact, her gothic outfit was originally the one worn at her grandfather's funeral.

Feng Nai himself is a girl who has died before she grows up. The body is or, but the heart is towards death.

And the ugliest kind of living people who think of death (living dead) will also decorate themselves in a form that can be distinguished at a glance. A dead man should have the appearance of a dead man. If there is a living person next door who is dressed normally, and it is perceived that he is actually the same kind as the person who only thinks about death, then no one can feel comfortable.

If you dress up as a dead person at a glance, no living person will dare to approach it.

This is the code of conduct for girls named Tokitsuki Kazuno. But there will still be living people approaching Tokitsuki Kazeno, and there will still be people approaching Tokitsuki Kazeno's death. Avoided his parents, avoided his sister, avoided pedestrians, and was finally found by a girl whose heart was for death.

It's like tonight, when Kazeno Tokitsuki, who was sitting alone on the cold garden stone, met a young girl. Like a broken machine, the girl staggered along the stone path in the middle of the courtyard. The sound of leather shoes and the ground sounded cold and biting. Tokitsuki Kazeno frowned and looked in the direction of the girl, but could only see a pitch-black unknown object. The bright moon hung high in the sky, but the girl's light seemed to be sucked away.

No, not sucking up. Kazeno denied his thoughts in his mind. It was this girl who transferred her light to someone else. She transferred her light to the earth, to the sky, to the moon. Everything around her seemed so bright and warm.

And she herself sank in darkness.

"It's dark and I can't see clearly......" Tokitsuki Kazeno said to the girl who was hidden in the darkness, "but your expression must be extremely ugly now......"

“……”

"While dedicating laughter to other people, comedian artists often can't laugh when they're home alone. Service workers who are always smiling and have cramps on their faces suffer the same way. There is a limit to what a person can have. No matter how great a person is, no matter how big his heart is, as long as he keeps sharing his warmth with others, he will continue to be eroded by the cold. Tokitsuki Kazeno said in a calm tone, "No matter how beautiful, kind, and gentle you are...... As long as you keep pushing yourself and thinking about the happiness of all, your own will continue to fall. Your face must be ugly now, and if you are not careful, you may frighten people......"

The girl in the darkness gently touched her cheek and sighed. She slowly walked behind Tokitsuki Kamino, hiding her face in Kazaki's back.

"I see, I said why Sister Mitsuki saw me like she saw a ghost. It turns out that I've become so ugly...... But compared to this, the wind is you're going to cut your wrists again! ”

Feng Nai was startled, only to realize that the utility knife in his hand had unconsciously bitten his fair skin. Probably what I saw from the girl's figure was too sad, and the "death" in Feng Nai's heart was accidentally dispatched again. However, the wound cut by the utility knife was too shallow, and even Feng Nai himself couldn't detect it.

But the girl noticed.

"Are you still paying attention to others at such a time? Sulfona. It's really your style. Feng Nai sighed and watched the blood beads slowly seep out of his skin, "But it's strange why you know so much about cutting your wrists." When we first met, the look in my eyes when I was given a utility knife was like a complete display of my behavior. But I've seen your hands, and you shouldn't have hurt yourself. ”

"If I hurt myself, wouldn't others be very worried when they saw it? I wouldn't do something stupid like that! Sulfona smiled and leaned on Kazuna's shoulder, "At this time, there are people around who often do this." ”

Kazeno frowned. The deeper you dig into this person, the more terrifying she feels. Kazeno couldn't get a glimpse of her single-minded inner world from her expression. Kazeno couldn't understand Sulfur at all, but she read about Sulfona's future from a fairy tale. I don't understand it, but I can know it. It's like watching a herd of lemmings in northern Norway commit suicide by jumping into the sea. (Actually, the claim that the lemming committed suicide is nothing more than a rumor.) ）

"Huh? Why didn't Kaze No-chan speak? Could it be that I made Funo-chan angry? I'm sorry, but self-harm isn't stupid. After all, Kano-chan can't live without self-harm! ”

“……”

As if he had been punched in the chest, Kazeno's body curled up. Obviously, he didn't say anything about himself to Sulfona, but the other party seemed to understand it completely. Not just understand, but understand. Kazeno's worldview, her beliefs, and her rejection of it were nothing in Sulfona's eyes. From the very beginning, Sulfona seemed to see the Wind Itself huddled beneath the ramparts.

This made Kaze no feel terrified.

"You...... What are you here for? ”

"Huh...... It's really cold. I'm just in a bad mood and want someone to talk to. ”

“……”

Before Tokitsuki Kazeno had time to think about whether to refuse or accept, Sulfur began to babble. Before she knew it, Kaze Na had been carried away by Sulfona's skillful conversational skills. It's like stepping into the subway, and before you know it, you're on the next stop. When Feng Nai came back to his senses, he found that he had finished listening to Sulfona's story.

"Kano-chan, tell me about it!"

"Say what?"

"Isn't Mitsuki hateful!" Sulfona pouted and said, "Just do what I say." This way, her favorite brother will not find out her disguise, and Mr. Hunpyeong will be happy to see his sister's body improve. Whether it's the doctor or the police, I can help my sister get through! Obviously taught her the method of happiness, and she was about to succeed, why did her sister suddenly want to destroy everything by herself? ”

“……”

"Whether it's Mitsuki's sister or her father, they're all so willful. I've already planned it for them, so just do as I tell them...... No, as long as you don't work against me, everyone can be happy! ”

“……”

"Kazeno, don't you think it's weird? Why didn't everyone cooperate with me? Did I not make it clear? Am I not doing well enough? I've worked hard! I'm already doing everything I can to help them? I don't need their gratitude, because I owe them and the world to the world...... But can't I even pay off my debts? ”

Tokitsuki Kaze was silent. Although Sulfona's voice still sounded the same as usual, Kazeno could feel something cold wet his shoulders.

Maybe it was Sulfona's tears, or maybe it was just an illusion. But Kazeno still sensed sadness in the emotions surging in the air. Unlike ordinary people, the "feelings" of Sulfona's existence are not a by-product of her own will. Wandering in the sight of others, constantly forcing herself to interpret the voices of others, racking her brains to plan a happy ending for everyone, and putting herself on the mask of a lie, in which Sulfona has deteriorated. Feelings became her means, her way of achieving her goals.

Is Sulfona really sad now? Her grief was just for Tokitsuki Kazeno to see. She hoped that her grief would be sympathized with by Kazeno so that Kazeno would answer her questions. But Sulfona's distorted posture and self-obliterating way of being already sympathetic to the wind had already made Kazuna sympathetic, which she herself may know.

Use your tears as a weapon, your sadness as a weapon, and even your pale self that you can't even make a sad expression as a weapon. The girl Sulfona has lost all the bottom line, lost her human qualifications, and has become a machine, a pure von Neumann machine.

Execute, execute, execute......

Then the von Neumann machine had a mistake that it could not solve.

So Sulfona was confused.

However, Tokitsuki Kaze was unable to answer Sulfona's confusion. Although he heard Sulfona's story clearly, understood Sulfur's questions, thought of the reasons, and knew how to solve everything, Tokitsuki Kazeno was unable to help Sulfur. Because that method itself is contradictory to Sulfona. Because that method must be understood by Sina with her own feelings.

Here an unsolvable contradiction arises.

Seeking to make everyone else happy, Sulfura gave up her feelings. Although this made her a big step on the road to success, the last bit of the gap could not be filled. Searching for a solution, Sulfona finds Kazeno, who discovers that that the way it requires is the feelings that Sulfona has lost.

If she awakens Sulfona's feelings, she will not be able to continue mechanically. If her feelings are not evoked, she will forever be trapped in a spiral of contradictions.

It's as ridiculous as one wants to lift oneself.

In the end, what Sulfona herself is pursuing may be nothingness. The sun that burns itself will fall, but the moon will endure. It is the very existence of Sulfona that takes this empty thing as the purpose of existence. To deny what Sulfur is pursuing is to kill Sulfur herself. Tokitsuki Kaze had already seen through all this, so he chose to self-exile. If she were asked to kill the current Sulfona in order to save Sulfona's future, she wouldn't be able to do it.

Nietzsche once said:

- "You should not speak to others for sympathy when you have suffered, because a person with a unique character, even his suffering is unique, profound, and not easily understood, and the sympathy of others will only relieve the individuality of your suffering, reduce it to banal troubles, and at the same time devalue your personality." ”

That's why Tokitsuki Kaze couldn't save Yuko. This may also be the reason why Tokitsuki Kaze was unable to save Sulfur.

Because, for some young girls, being alive is inherently painful.

Sulfona should also know a lot about this. Because Sulfura is a hundred times smarter than Tokitsuki Kazeno, and she is a hundred times more ruthless than Tokitsuki Kazeno, who still retains human emotions. Tokitsuki is something that needs to be understood in words, and feelings that need to be read from the atmosphere are so obvious in Sulfona's eyes.

Subtle.

It took Kazeno Tokitsuki about a month to understand the state of Sulfur, and he knew that he had only recently remembered the fairy tale that Sulfur corresponded to. But it's always been the opposite, and Sulfur has seen through Tokitsuki Kazuno's nature from the beginning. Sulfona knew that the wind would never help others, and that all she did was watch the things that were destined to perish come to their end.

It was precisely because of this understanding that Sulfur Na completely confided her heart to Kazeno. Because she knew that Tokitsuki Kaze would never answer herself, she would untie the shackles in her heart. Just like some people only reveal their true nature when they lock themselves in a single room. For Sulfona, talking to Kazeno Tokitsuki may be like talking to a wall.

Sulfona was talking to herself.

In the silent midnight, Sulfura was alone in the Japanese courtyard full of the smell of death, talking to herself and asking and answering questions.

I knew that I would never get results, but I kept asking.

Why is that?

Probably because of a bug that couldn't be solved, the machine called Sulfur finally broke down.

Looking at such a sulfona, strong emotions surged in Tokitsuki Kazeno's chest. The emotion was boiling, rising up her throat.

A girl who fights for the happiness of others, locks herself in a overlapping mask, and makes her heart as hard as iron. Because only such a hard heart can bear that kind of pain. All her own things are given to others, and she herself is getting uglier and uglier. In the end, she finds herself walking on a loop of Morbius that has no end.

She's on her way to perdition.

"Why don't they do what I say? Obviously then everyone can be happy? ”

Sulfur asked with a smile. But that expression soon changed to a crying face, a surprised face, an angry face. The mask of expression kept falling off Sulfona's body. She had shared her feelings with others, and all that remained was a dark crumb.

In the face of such a sulfona, what can Feng Na do?

The suppressed stuff in my throat finally came out.

"I see, you're the Happy Prince......"

Under the moonlight, the dark fairy tale of Tokitsuki Kazeno begins again.