"Failed again" Lying on the hospital bed, Lillard looked out the window and hung his hands weakly. Pen, fun, and www.biquge.info

The sunlight in the room filled with the smell of disinfectant water always feels extremely heavy.

If you still make these things before the exam, will you be able to catch up with them in the days after?

Wearing a blue and white striped hospital gown, his heart was pinched as he listened to the conversation of the rest of the room and the endless stream of people outside the hallway.

If you go on like this, can you only go to a university that does not enter the stream, and then graduate and enter a so-so small business, marry a very ordinary or sub-ordinary woman, continue to have children, and go on like countless ordinary people?!

I'm just an ordinary person, or someone who isn't even as good as an ordinary person.

I really want to die.

Lillard pinched the quilt and wanted to cry. Why is it yourself, why is it this time? I really want to study hard!

Are you really not serious enough, are you not working hard enough?

But what is effort, what exactly is the standard of effort and conscientiousness?

Is this how my life is bound?

I want to.... I want to.... I had a girlfriend in the last days of high school!

I really want to have a friend.

But what is a friend?

Just talk and don't hate each other?

Leillard rolled over, avoiding the wound and lying on his back, looking at the unfamiliar ceiling, he felt a little cold and wanted to go home.

It's still safe at home, there is food and drink, no one else intrudes into your sight at will, you can huddle in your room with peace of mind, no one cares, you don't have to worry about anything, and you won't be afraid of others hurting you.

Lillard felt that it would hurt to stay outside any longer, and he would rather stay at home and be a waste man than go out.

You don't have to think about exams, reading, terrible relationships, and a lot of things.

Or take a small basin, close the room and burn charcoal to commit suicide, and die in the most secure place is also a kind of self-comfort.

Is death a terrible thing?

It didn't seem scary, for every second of his breath he breathed, dozens or hundreds of lives died around the world.

Some of them were starved to death, some were beaten to death, some were because of disease, and some were because of the violence of others, when the world was depressed, there were not many people who jumped from the building, even around them, there were many people who died in various accidents, turn on the TV, there will be countless people who die normally or unnaturally, and the reason why they don't want to die so soon is actually for their parents.

Because they carry their hopes and their future, how cruel it would be for them to cut themselves off like this.

Just for the sake of parents, you have to study hard, work hard to be a person, and work hard to live, right?

But it's not my will.

What do you really want to do? What do you really want?

Leillard lost his mind again.

It's easy to live, but why to live is that people like him who are not smart enough are completely lost.

Maybe it's just to survive.

No one remembers, no one misses, and the world filled with other people's world like the background board may be their own character positioning.

One more word and one more action are redundant.

Others only need their own flattery and help, not themselves, and they don't need to work with them, don't they?

Lillard sighed and began to look through his school bag, even if he was hospitalized, he had to review it well.

You can't always be too negative about reading, even if you know that it can only improve your sleep quality, but let's take a look.

"Xu Qian, how are you doing? I'm really happy to receive your reply recently. It's one of the few letters I've ever received, and I've been in touch with other people sporadically through letters, but as my junior high school studies have worsened, I don't know what? After I got fourth in my class in my midterm exams, I was going to have a breakdown and I was depressed. Zhang Chi is the first in the class this time, do you still know Zhang Chi, he is the class president of our original primary school........

Okay, let's talk about it next time, the classmate you transferred to after the school was also in our class, and his grades were not bad. If nothing happens I'll be in 11, hopefully we'll meet there again later!"

There were four or five letters in the bag mixed in with a certain book, and this was the last one.

In the end, it stopped on the eve of the first year of high school.

I didn't go to eleven, I didn't go to four, I didn't go to seventeen, but I went to twenty-six.

The other party is so high-minded, is he still qualified to continue to write letters with the other party?

Wouldn't talking to her like a dragger make you look like you're elevating your identity?

Won't the other party get bored?

It's just that the other party is bored and needs to solve some difficulties in life to find himself.,In fact, it's similar to finding someone else.,I'm just a long-term tablemate of the other party's first to third grades.,I later transferred to another school for three or four consecutive years and had no contact.,I once fantasized about each other's bodies.。

Such a self!

Such a self!

Isn't it dirty?!

With such a former tablemate, no one will regard it as a friend, and it is estimated that they will not laugh when they meet.

We absolutely... Definitely not friends!

Lillard closed his eyes in pain, tucked the letter into his book, and lay on his bed in frustration to continue to blame himself for his past mistakes.

People like themselves don't deserve anything anymore.

This is probably the reason why I have no friends, compared to those people, I am nothing, nothing, neither noble nor kind, not laughing, not humorous enough, and unable to listen to their voices intimately. He couldn't do what others wanted him to do, and in the end, he lost even his own hope. Can such a self still persist in living?

Lillard felt the weight of the stone press against his chest, and he could barely breathe.

Not to mention the fact that the exam was interrupted for no reason because of himself, the shame that made Leillard feel painful now.

The paper was not finished, and his score was only more than ten points, so he was in such a state that he had no way to prepare for the exam, even if he went to take the college entrance examination, it was estimated that he would not even be able to go to university. Thinking of his parents' bitter cheeks, he simply lost the courage to continue living.

My parents have always been proud of themselves, they have had good academic performance since they were children, and they have won a lot of awards, even if they jumped from the bad class to the key class last year, their parents have shown off to the neighbors for a long time with their own things. This would, if you didn't even get into college in the end..... This kind of reality was slapped in the face, and he couldn't think of what it would be like for his parents to be human beings with their tails between their legs in front of others.

It's all my fault, it's all because I'm not angry, I'm so useless!

Such a useless self is still alive!

Lillard only felt a large hand in his chest pinching his heart, his neck was also tightly wrapped in some kind of slippery tentacles, his breathing became more and more rapid, and he vaguely saw countless frost flowers condensed on the windows, countless fog was spreading outside the building, and a group of suspicious figures in tattered clothes and hoods were faintly walking in his direction.

"Damn! Don't you need to continue to feel sorry for yourself at this time! Isn't this a dream dominated by me!!

Tiramiels found himself unable to enter the hospital room.

There was a thin circle of light separating her, and the burning sensation made her think her soul had been hurt.

The Dementors have entered here.

Ice marks had begun to spread on the ground, and a Dementor had entered Lyrald's side, and if he continued like this, he would be dying!

Aren't you harmful!!

Tiramiels rushed in, she didn't want to die because of this waste! )