Coming out of the restaurant, Ruhan couldn't help but cry, she was very uncomfortable, she was sorry for Shang Wen, but she couldn't accept him; She loves Zhao Gang, but she can't destroy his family. Finally took a car, returned home, couldn't control the love anymore, threw herself on the bed and cried, at this moment, she thought of death, but also thought of a person, when she left in the morning, the computer was not turned off, logged in QQ, Zhao Gang's avatar kept flashing, opened it and saw that it was sent ten minutes ago: "Little girl, are you home?"

"I just got home, brother, I want to die!" Ruhan replied. Since Ruhan's vague confession, Zhao Gang has always asked Ruhan to call him "brother", instead of being a leader.

"What's wrong with you, what's wrong?" Zhao Gang replied immediately.

"I feel like I'm going to break up with my boyfriend and I'm having a hard time! I feel like I'm sorry for him! As soon as Ruhan's words were finished, he heard the mobile phone ringing, and Ruhan took it and saw that it was Zhao Gang.

"Little girl, don't scare me, don't think about it, are you at home by yourself? Is there anyone else around? I can hear that Zhao Gang is very anxious.

Hearing Zhao Gang's voice, Ruhan couldn't speak, he felt a sore feeling in his heart, and cried loudly, Ruhan's crying made Zhao Gang even more anxious, he was worried that something would happen to Ruhan, so he blindly comforted on the other end of the phone: "Ruhan, don't do stupid things, who are you with?" Fast! Sue me your mother's phone! I'll call her and ask her to accompany you! Otherwise, you wait for me, I'll drive back immediately, don't do anything stupid, don't! Zhao Gang's words knocked on Ruhan's heart, and she could feel that he was worried about her and concerned about her safety, and she felt a lot more relieved.

"It's okay, brother, I'm fine, don't worry, I won't die, I just want to die, but I won't." Ruhan said crying.

"Okay, then I'll rest assured, I can't die, I can't die because of a man, it's not worth it." Hearing Ruhan's words, Zhao Gang's tone relaxed. At this time, Zhao Gang didn't really fall in love with Ruhan, but just felt that he should care about this girl, after all, a little girl has paid so much for herself, how can she not be moved, but he doesn't know that moving is not love, and accepting a person for the sake of moving is the biggest harm to this person.

This day is June 8th, and it is the first time that Zhao Gang and Ruhan have chatted on the phone, and after chatting for a long time, Zhao Gang said a lot of things that he had not said before. It's been four years, and Ruhan really feels this man's concern, and she thinks this is love.

Putting down the phone, Ruhan couldn't calm down, and wrote a diary in the space:

Looking back on these years, I really hate myself, every choice is wrong, the first choice was him in high school, we went through a good time together, in the end, he abandoned me for the benefit of the family, the stubbornness in my bones made me not want to fight for anything, my heart has long been broken, I can't believe in love, until he appears. I thought he could heal the wounds in my heart, but now I know that choosing him was another mistake of mine, his identity is destined not to give me happiness, at this moment, I heard the sound of heartbreak. I really want to find a place to cry, but I'm so afraid of the emptiness and loneliness after crying, maybe I have to face another choice, I hope my next choice is right, don't let me remember the past, except for regret or regret.

But why is my heart broken, people are still there, how long can a person without a heart live in this world, to him, I love him so much that I can't love, to him, I hate him so much that I can't hate, he has nothing to do with him, but it also hurts me the most, since then I really can't believe in love, it's so ethereal, as if it has never existed, maybe true love has passed by in my life, in the past, how can I find it back, that's it, forget it, loneliness is destined to be more reliable than love.

Death is not destined to be the best choice, my death is not terrible, what is terrible is that I can't bear to see the pain of the people who love me when they lose me, for them, I am willing to live well, and use strength to whitewash my fragility. It's good to be alive! Look no further!

Digression: Brother, I'm sorry for you, maybe you will be a little worried when you see this passage, but there is no way, this is the only place where I can confide in my heart, you are my only reader.

The next day, Ruhan opened the QQ space and saw Zhao Gang's message:

I was really worried last night, so I called, and at the end you laughed, and I was relieved because it meant it was okay; Reading this article today, I feel that you have already expressed all the feelings in your heart, and I am more relieved.

In high school, he is the person you love deeply, because you don't get it, and if you get it, you may find that it's not true, because what you don't get is always the best; Now he is what you love, but you are destined not to be together, after these things, your pain may be reasonable, you should not deliberately use a new relationship to make up for the trauma of the old relationship, maybe anyone will do that, but the result is that you still can't forget, but instead add another heartache person, Huang Shangwen should not be a victim of your healing trauma, you don't really love him, that's why you are in pain.

Whether it is the one you love or the one who loves you, meeting him in life is a kind of fate, and it is God's arrangement. Don't blame the sky, because life is inevitably apprehensive, although the once possessed, the happiness that once had has gone with the wind, but at least it is a memory, a kind of beauty that can be met but not sought, my brother does not want you to cry alone, so torture yourself.

Relax your mind and make up for your inner love and hate with work, instead of running away or looking for a new relationship, or you will hurt even more.

It's still the same sentence: you can't afford a new relationship at this time

Since June 8, Shangwen has not been in contact with Ruhan, and Ruhan has not called him, and the two have not said that they have broken up, but it is better to break up. Zhao Gang often chats with Ruhan on QQ, or calls Ruhan directly, and the content of the conversation is mostly persuasion, encouragement, or some innocuous jokes. When he was in a bad mood, Ruhan would publish some sentimental articles in QQ space, and Zhao Gang commented on them one by one, which made Ruhan very moved. Later, after chatting a lot, Zhao Gang's attitude towards Ruhan changed.

"Sister, if you're still uncomfortable, come to Xingling to find me." Zhao Gang's words surprised Ruhan.

"I really want to see my brother, but I'm afraid it's not appropriate for me to go, when my brother goes back to Haicheng, he will be happy to see me in the office." If Han has no evil thoughts, she can be commensurate with Zhao Gang as a brother and sister, she will be very content.

"It's okay, you come, you live on the bed, my brother lives on the sofa, I won't touch you." Zhao Gang said with a smile.

"Isn't that right? Elder brother? My sister-in-law will definitely misunderstand if she finds out. I won't go, I'll wait for you to come back, there are some things I want to talk to you face-to-face, and when I feel comfortable, I'll live a good life and no longer have any thoughts. Ruhan's words are very clear, since he vaguely confessed on May 11, Ruhan has always regretted that he should not reveal his feelings to Zhao Gang.

"Okay, I'll see you when I go back, don't be too sad these days, if Huang Shangwen doesn't want you, you can be my junior, my brother will definitely be good to you!" Zhao Gang swore that it didn't look like a joke.

"Little San'er?" Ruhan asked rhetorically, she couldn't help but be shocked, she didn't expect Zhao Gang to have such an idea, and she didn't know whether to be happy or sad for a while.