The Second People's Hospital of Qinshan City, Ward 1202 of the Inpatient Department of Psychiatric Patients. Pen @ fun @ pavilion wWw. ｂｉｑUｇE。 ｉｎｆｏ

"Lao Wang, didn't you say that I can be discharged from the hospital today? Why don't you let me go! How can you be untrustworthy to the mentally ill? Gu Xiaotian glared at the attending doctor in front of him and said angrily.

Doctor Wang's originally calm face suddenly twitched, and he pointed at Gu Xiaotian and said, "You still dare to propose to the hospital with me, you go and see what Xiao Zhou in the opposite ward has been made into by you!" ”

"What's wrong with Xiao Zhou, don't you want to thank me for my selfless help to him?" Gu Xiaotian squinted his eyes and smiled proudly.

Seeing this, Dr. Wang couldn't help but sigh with hatred: "Look at your current attitude, you don't have the slightest intention of admitting your mistakes and repenting, why did you give Xiao Zhou so many contraceptive pills?" ”

Gu Xiaotian leaned back in his chair, ignoring Dr. Wang's expression, and leisurely rubbed his fingers against the ash between his toes: "Xiao Zhou said that his life has been too frequent recently, and he was worried about pregnancy, so I got some contraceptive pills for Xiao Zhou in the spirit of sympathy for the same neurotic person, Lao Wang, you touch your conscience and say, isn't this selfless for me?" ”

"Xiao Zhou is a psychopath, can you believe that those things are all fantasies?" Dr. Wang couldn't help but be angry.

Gu Xiaotian lowered his head and blew his feet, raised his head and asked: "What's wrong with mental illness, it's not what you said, we must treat everyone equally and give more care to the mentally ill, I'm obviously responding to your call!" ”

"But TMD Xiao Zhou is a man!" Dr. Wang was so angry that he blew his beard and glared, patted the table and said, "You go and see what Xiao Zhou has eaten, the hormones have stimulated the development of his chest." ”

"Oh...... I understand! Gu Xiaotian put down his feet and had an expression that I understood: "It must be that Xiao Zhou's breasts are bigger than your wife's, are you psychologically unbalanced?" But Lao Wang, don't worry, I just knew that the contraceptive pill still has this effect, and I will send some to my sister-in-law when I go back to ensure that the medicine is cured. ”

"I'm in my thirties and I don't even have a child now, and you still have to send birth control pills to my wife!" Doctor Wang's angry half of his body trembled, and he searched left and right, really wanting to get a knife to slaughter this kid.

Gu Xiaotian touched a pencil from the table and drew patterns on the paper that normal humans couldn't understand at all: "Then I think Lao Wang, you may need some nourishing aphrodisiacs." ”

"......" Looking at Gu Xiaotian's leisurely appearance, Dr. Wang's heart was like 10,000 grass and mud horses galloping by, and he couldn't wait to go up and press this guy to the ground to vent. Ever since this guy came, he has been called a haggard man every day, only in his thirties, and he can't count the white hair.

"That's right, Gu Xiaotian." Dr. Wang suddenly thought of a very serious question: "Where did you get so many birth control pills?" ”

"Oh, once you put the white coat here, I tried it on, it fits quite well, when I think of the predicament that Xiao Zhou is facing, I can't bear it, so I went to the nurse to ask for some contraceptive pills." Gu Xiaotian had already thrown away the pencil and slowly tore the paper piece by piece.

"The nurse gave you the medicine?" Dr. Wang was a little confused.

"Of course it's not that simple, the nurse said how come she has never seen me before, but fortunately I'm witty, otherwise I really wouldn't be able to get this birth control pill." Speaking of this, Gu Xiaotian laughed, with a sly glint in his eyes.

"What did you say?" Dr. Wang was curious.

Gu Xiaotian threw away the shredded paper, took out a hair wax from his pocket, and rubbed his hair in the mirror: "I said that I am Dr. Wang's new apprentice, Dr. Wang has recently raised a lot of little lovers outside, and he was worried that his lover was pregnant, so he asked me to ask for some contraceptive pills, and the nurse didn't ask anything more, and gave me a lot of medicines in a panic, and was very polite to me." But Lao Wang, don't worry, for the sake of the nurse's sister Mimi, I specially told her that this matter must be strictly guarded by the top state secret, and she will definitely not talk nonsense everywhere. ”

"! I won't talk nonsense, several nurses know it! After listening to Gu Xiaotian's words, Dr. Wang was already panting like a cow, and his eyes were sparkling: "I said that the eyes of those nurses who looked at me were so weird recently, Lao Tzu thought that he had become more attractive recently, it turned out that you were all the devil!" Have you ever thought about what to do if this nonsense thing reaches my wife's ears! ”

Gu Xiaotian raised his head and looked at Doctor Wang, and thought about it seriously: "Sister-in-law may treat others in the same way as others...... But that's fine, maybe you'll be able to have a child from now on, Wang. ”

"Gu Xiaotian!" Dr. Wang got up from the chair with a look of wanting to eat people, every time he talked to this guy, this heart had to go from hell, sometimes he even wondered if this guy was pretending to be a psychopath, but after a professional examination by several attending doctors, this guy did have a bit of a mental problem, but it was not serious, and there were signs of relief and peace recently, so he was ready to let him out of the hospital, but he didn't expect him to drum up Xiao Zhou again.

"Lao Wang, why are you more irritable than my psychopath? For my personal safety, I feel the need to take you to a psychiatrist for a check-up. Seeing Dr. Wang's angry appearance, Gu Xiaotian put down the wax and stood up, and said a little nervously.

"You sit down for me!" Doctor Wang took a deep breath to calm his state of mind, and then said angrily: "In addition to Xiao Zhou's matter, also, why did you let Zhu Jue next door dig out his kidney to make roasted kidneys and eat it?" ”

"You wronged me again, Lao Wang." Gu Xiaotian said with an aggrieved face: "That day, Zhu Jue told me that he felt that he had a problem with some aspect of his function recently, so I told him what to eat and what to make up, but how do I know that this kid dug out his waist and roasted it, saying that he ate the right kidney to make up for the left waist, do you think this can blame me?" ”

"You...... You ......" Doctor Wang trembled angrily, and pointed at Gu Xiaotian for a long time, but you didn't come up with a reason, feeling that no matter what you said, you would be killed by this kid.

"Don't be so excited, I'll give you some hair wax to relax, you see you're worried about the child's business, the white hair is out." Gu Xiaotian sighed, and had already taken the hair wax and walked around behind Dr. Wang.

After Dr. Wang carefully confirmed that Gu Xiaotian's hand was really wax, he dared to let him tinker, closed his eyes and leaned back in the chair, he was powerless to argue with Gu Xiaotian now.

"Lao Wang, when will I be discharged from the hospital?" Gu Xiaotian asked anxiously while seriously kneading Dr. Wang's hairstyle.

"Originally, I was going to discharge you from the hospital today, but when you suddenly made up these things again, the authorities immediately didn't dare to agree, and asked you to stay in the hospital for another six months for observation."

"Six months?" When Gu Xiaotian heard this, his face immediately shriveled: "Old Wang, this is not good!" You have to hurry up and give me accommodation, I've been locked up for four months, and I'll have to be mentally ill for another six months. ”

Dr. Wang was speechless for a while: "Aren't you mentally ill now......?"

Gu Xiaotian was not happy when he heard this, and shouted at the top of his voice: "Compared with them, Lao Tzu is already a normal person, okay!" Will Lao Tzu roast his own kidneys and eat them? Just kidding, if you want to roast Zhu Jue, don't say it, Lao Wang, Zhu Jue's waist is really delicious. ”

"! Zhu Jue's kidney, you also eaten? Dr. Wang just felt his heart twitch.

"Yes! Zhu Jue's scalpel for digging his waist is still the one I gave him! In order to repay my kindness, he gave me half of his loin. After explaining, Gu Xiaotian felt still unhappy, and yelled angrily: "But Lao Wang, what kind of tone are you!?" Don't I need to make up for my waist? I wish Jue 135 to relax my body, I 246 to exercise my arm strength, on Sunday we both exchanged opinions with each other on this week's experience and experience, and then I helped him relax his body, he exercised my arm strength for me, you said that if I don't make up for my waist, can I keep up with his rhythm? ”

"! Are you two going to heaven? Why don't you go to the moon! Doctor Wang jumped up from his chair, ignoring the fact that Gu Xiaotian was waxing his hair, and scolded impatiently.

"If you don't go to the moon, you won't go to the moon, there will be a Chang'e on the moon, how can we divide it when we both go up." Gu Xiaotian explained, looked at Doctor Wang, who was pale, and cautiously asked, "Why don't you ...... Bring your sister-in-law to us then? ”

"Gu Xiaotian !!" Dr. Wang couldn't bear it anymore, he couldn't wait to stab the guy in front of him with a knife, roared, like a headless fly, and began to rummage through the drawers, but after a long time, he didn't find anything, and finally sat on the chair and gasped: "Don't you kid like to steal scalpels every day?" How is there nothing today. ”

Gu Xiaotian smiled mysteriously and took out a scalpel from his arms: "In my arms!" ”

"......me" Dr. Wang tilted his head and fell weakly on the chair, he felt that it was also beneficial to come into contact with Gu Xiaotian, at least his heart capacity was indeed much higher than before. Looking at Gu Xiaotian who was dancing in front of him, Dr. Wang muttered weakly: "You and Zhu Jue, one gives birth control pills to men and the other gives aphrodisiacs to women, but they are really the twin stars of our hospital......"

"Hehe, it's all about helping patients, it should be ......" Gu Xiaotian put the scalpel on the table, and walked around behind Doctor Wang with a smile: "Lao Wang, your hairstyle is not done yet, let's continue." ”

"Wait!" Dr. Wang suddenly felt sticky on his scalp, and hurriedly waved his hand to make Gu Xiaotian stop, and asked, "Is your hair wax expired?" ”

"It's not expired!" Gu Xiaotian hurriedly showed Dr. Wang the production date of the hair wax: "Look, it won't expire until next year." ”

"Then why do I feel different this time than last time?" Dr. Wang was a little confused.

"Because it's my saliva that wiped you this time!" Gu Xiaotian said cutely: "Actually, I originally wanted to use hair wax for you, but Lao Wang, you look in the mirror and look at your current hair, you don't want to feel the hair on your lower body is vigorous, are you still qualified to use the hair wax I snatched from the dog's mouth at the risk of my life?" ”

"I'm ......" Doctor Wang gritted his teeth and stretched out his trembling hand, picked up the scalpel that Gu Xiaotian had placed on the table, and wanted to turn around and give this kid a knife.

"Lao Wang, what are you going to do, but you can't think about it! Hurry up and put the knife down, if you are bald, we can go for a hair transplant, and if you are infertile, you can find someone to raise your sister-in-law, for example, I will be happy to serve, and I will not be charged if I am not pregnant, and the price is the same for boys and girls, but although our relationship is here...... But if it's twins, it's definitely going to cost a little more, and if it's quadruplets, it's even more expensive, ...... Lao Wang, you haven't stabbed yourself yet, why are you lying here still? I said, even if you pretend to be dead, can you take a little heart...... Distracted! With your acting skills, is it okay to be designated to be directed NG? ”

Seeing Lao Wang, who fainted directly on the chair, Gu Xiaotian said that he was very helpless, and probed with his fingers to find that he was still breathing, so he was not so worried, after taking out the mobile phone from Lao Wang's pocket and putting it in his pocket, Gu Xiaotian hurriedly ran out and pulled a nurse into the ward, pointed at Doctor Wang and said, "Lao Wang is pretending to be dead, you hurry up and wake him up." ”

Nurse: "......"

In the end, the nurse called a few people and sent Lao Wang to the ward.

Gu Xiaotian ran back to the bed happily and took out Dr. Wang's mobile phone: "Lao Wang, this guy has a lot of stock in his mobile phone, and he can enjoy it slowly this time......"

But when Gu Xiaotian just turned on his phone, he saw a line of words on the screen: "Is it implanted in a psychiatric system?" ”

"What the hell, is this the system that Lao Wang newly downloaded?" Gu Xiaotian thought for a while, and finally decisively nodded yes. If you don't install it, how can you be worthy of your mentally ill identity!

"Drop! The host has been selected, the system is being implanted into the host's body, please ...... later"

"No, isn't this a mobile phone system, how can it be implanted in the host's body? Also, what is the host ......?"

"Drop! After the system is installed, the host can first fulfill a wish. When Gu Xiaotian was puzzled, another voice came from his head.

Gu Xiaotian's thinking is also strange, ordinary people are probably frightened when they encounter this situation, but he immediately laughed and said, "So good!" Then I'm going to be discharged from the hospital, get me out of here quickly! ”

"Okay, we're choosing a new life form for the host...... Drop, you've chosen, please get ready. ”

As soon as the voice in his head fell, Gu Xiaotian suddenly felt a strange feeling coming from his body, his brain was a little swollen, and a huge suction force came from his body, as if he was going to suck him into the mobile phone in front of him......

Gu Xiaotian realized that it seemed to be very dangerous, and he was taken aback: "What is the situation with you?" I don't want to leave here, cancel, unsubscribe! I don't want it! Groove ...... Say no! Why don't you stop, I'm going to give you a bad review, I'm going to call your leaders over, I'm going to complain about you...... You ......"

"Welcome the host to a new time and space to take over new life and start your journey of rebirth......

After this sentence drifted through Gu Xiaotian's mind, he felt that his body was unconscious, and he fell asleep in a drowsy manner.