We stayed in City C for one night, and after adjusting our mood, we went back to Lefan's hometown.

According to the customs of Lefan's hometown, people need to hold a banquet when they die, and they also need to collect funeral money. However, according to Le Fan's wishes, the funeral banquet will not be held, and it is enough to notify people who have a better relationship with Le Fan to attend the funeral.

It took a day to rearrange Lefan's home and change the more festive things or furniture.

At night, You's mother asked me to stay in You's house, and I lived in the room next to Lefan, and when I was lying in bed, I was thinking, what will happen when people die?

Whether it will dissipate without a trace, or whether there is a soul.

I hope it's the latter, maybe at this time, Le Fan is by our side with us, watching us feel sorry for her, watching us miss her constantly.

Early the next morning, the moment I opened my eyes, I only felt that my eyes were very sore. Reaching out and touching the pillow, it was already wet.

I remember that Le Fan came to see me last night, and I hugged her and cried for a long time, complaining to her about the grievances and pain in my heart, and why she was so ruthless to leave us who loved her.

Seeing that I was crying in pain, she just smiled and didn't say anything, and then, she pushed me away, then waved at me, and turned away.

I tried to hold her hand, but when I rushed over to pull it, it passed through her hand, and I could only watch her leave without looking back.

After taking care of herself, she went downstairs, and You's mother was still sitting in the living room with a sad face, and she didn't see You's father.

I walked over and sat down next to Mother You, "Auntie, where's Uncle?" ”

Mother You looked at me, and then said with a little choked up, "Let's go to the flower room!" His thrush hasn't been fed for two days. ”

I was slightly stunned, and then silent.

I went to the kitchen to make breakfast for the two old men, and when I came out, Father You had not yet come out of the flower room. After breakfast was served, I walked slowly to the flower room.

Standing at the door of the flower room, I saw Father You standing in front of the thrush birdcage, smoking a cigarette one by one, his brows furrowed.

Suddenly, Father You reached out and touched the corner of his eye, I was stunned and hurriedly withdrew.

Leaning against the wall to the side, he endured the sourness of his nose.

Sometimes, what seems painful is not necessarily really painful; Sometimes, what seems to be pain is real pain; Sometimes it seems that it is not painful, but it may not be painful; However, sometimes it seems that it is not painful but it is really painful.

Another day passed, and this day, I was very busy. Because all of Le Fan's friends heard the news, they all came with mournful expressions.

The people I once met at Zhang Yiyang's wedding were all red and swollen eyes.

Roman said that several people thought she was joking, and if it weren't for her uncontrollable crying, maybe they wouldn't want to believe that it was all true.

After a busy day, I finally told them that at seven o'clock tomorrow morning, after Le Fan's ashes were buried in the ** cemetery, they left one by one with red eyes.

Roman didn't leave, but first asked Xu Yunqiang to take Xu Wenbo home.

Li Ruilun also left, but before leaving, he said a word to Roman, and saw Roman shaking his head at him, and there seemed to be nothing wrong with his face except for a faint sadness.

However, when Li Ruilun walked out of Le Fan's house, Roman's tears fell.

I walked over and patted her on the shoulder.

Although, I don't know what Li Ruilun said to her, but I know that some of Roman's feelings in his heart completely dissipated after that sentence.

Roman insisted on staying and taking care of her, but I persuaded her to go back, she was different from me, I was alone, but she had a home to take care of.

Le Fan's funeral was over, and the song ended, and Father You supported Mother You, who was full of grief, and the two slowly paced back to the room.

Looking at the two rickety backs, I was so strong and rational just now, and all disappeared in an instant.

watched Father You gently caress Mother You's back; looked at Mother You's messy steps; looked at her slightly trembling body; Looking at ...... All this ......

I don't even know how I walked back to Lefan's room, I didn't go back to the room where You's mother let me stay, but back to the room that made me familiar and unfamiliar.

None of this seems to have changed, the room is still the same as before, and it's still the same as before.

The bed is still the same bed, and it seems that you can still feel the smell and temperature on it; On the bedside photo, the smiling faces are still fixed at that moment, and Le Fan's bright smile seems to be still in front of him; On that glass table, there was also a book with a bookmark in it, as if waiting for its owner to take it out and continue reading the unfinished story......

I caressed everything in the room little by little, and opened the book, which is a modern poetry collection, and turned the page with the bookmark, Xi Murong's "A Flowering Tree":

How to make you meet me

In my most beautiful moments

for this

I have been praying before the Buddha for 500 years

Ask it to make us a dust bond

The Buddha then turned me into a tree

Grow by the side of the road where you must pass

Flowers bloom discreetly in the sun

The flowers are all my expectations in my previous life

When you walk in

Please listen

That trembling leaf is the enthusiasm I wait

And when you finally walk by in defiance

Falling to the ground behind you

Friends

That's not petals

It's my withered heart.

On the side of the book, in Juanxiu's handwriting:

I prayed in front of the Buddha for 500 years, and the Buddha let us form a mortal relationship, but he did not stingy with each other for a lifetime;

If you are destined to be each other's passers-by in this life, even if your heart withers, I still want to see you happy in your life.

Syllable...

A tear hit the page, and the emotions I had been holding back finally collapsed at this moment, and I sat down on the floor weakly.

"Le Fan ......"

I roared hoarsely, desperately.

"Lefan... Lefan... You Lefan! ”

In this small bedroom, I let out my pain, my sorrow, and at this moment, in this space, I felt like I was about to suffocate.

"You Lefan......" I shouted loudly and unscrupulously, at this moment, there are no more scruples, there is too much pain buried in my heart, I can only use this useless way to tell the sorrow in my heart.

After a burst of hysterical crying, I choked up and buried my head, letting the tears wash over my face and taste the bitterness in my mouth.

"You Lefan—" I shouted in a low voice, and in the silence of the night, even such a soft voice I could hear clearly.

Le Fan......

At that moment, I actually had resentment in my heart, and even, I hated a little, hated her, and hated myself, or, too much pain gathered together, I couldn't find someone to hate, so I could only hate, the person who made me miserable, the same person, the person I cared about the most.

I actually had a lot to say, but when it came to my mouth, I couldn't get a word out of it, I could only call her name in the blank, and I didn't know what this would bring me.

My mind may have gone blank, but no, it was just a cloud of memories of her.

Her laughter still seemed to be swirling in my head, her smile took over my eyeballs, and even with my eyes open, all I could see was her smiling face.

It's like being scared.