It is often said that a woman in love usually has zero IQ, but I never thought that I would become insatiable because of love, so that I was greedy to the point of going crazy. After repeated contusions, my inner world, which had been soaked in wind and sleep, became sensitive and fragile, and the confidence to move forward at first ran to wander, and even if I found it, I guess I would not have the courage to pick it up again with such a stumbling background.

In a fit of anger, he didn't give Long Shao any chance to defend himself, and privately sentenced him to a series of sins such as Hongxing going out of the wall, abandoning the chaos from beginning to end, breaking his promise, etc., and resolutely left the Long family with the stubbornness that Gemini should have. I know that the servants of the Long family are not idle people, and as soon as I leave on the front foot, someone will report to Long Shaofeng on the back foot.

Leaving the Long family, walking alone on this lonely street, smelling the fragrance of acacia flowers all the way, from time to time you will see a large area of falling scenes, and even a few strings will wither on my shoulders, my shoes, and my hands. I have been fascinated by the world of flowers for too long and I don't know that I have reached the door of my house, and I think about it, every time this season, I can find my way home with my eyes closed and smelling the faint sweetness.

Standing in front of the old rampant door with burrs, hesitated for a few seconds before taking out the key, the door handrail that used to shine under the slanting sun has now become dull, and it still "squeaks" when the door is opened, how long has my mother not left the house or how long has she not returned home? I don't know if the dust on the door ran into my eyes, and I squinted, and after a while, it became red and swollen. Didn't you say that you can't put sand in your eyes? Isn't that true?

I wanted to pack my luggage and leave quickly, but as soon as I stepped into my bedroom, a sluggish black shadow leaned on the sofa, and the dim light seemed to be extinguished at any time, and it could no longer burn itself to illuminate others. She kept touching the childish face in the photo with her thick calloused hands, and the corners of her mouth raised a sad smile from time to time. Suddenly there was a sense of guilt called guilt came to me again, I never thought that my ruthless departure would make this home so desolate, she raised me with hard work, is it really so important to me compared to whether I am born or not? I walked up to her step by step, slowly hugged her in a circle with my hands, and choked up, "Mom...... I am back! After saying that, tears rained down.

The afterglow of the setting sun did not reflect the slightest red into the house, and I saw my mother slowly raise her forehead and squint her eyes to find a beam of light that could see my figure clearly in this dim line of sight, and only after repeated confirmation did she dare to release the emotions that she had been holding back for a long time: "You are finally back, I thought you would never want your mother again?" ”

The strong woman who has sheltered me from the wind and rain since I was a child, at this moment seems so helpless, crying like a child, when I hugged my mother affectionately, and smelled the familiar smell of her, I realized that even if the whole world abandoned me, my mother would not abandon me. I have been dependent on each other for so many years, and I really hate that I understood it so late.

She is now in a bit of a trance, one moment sober, the other confused. I refused to let go of the yellowed photo in my hand, and I kept whispering to the "me" in the photo.

While tidying up the room, I stumbled upon an old diary in a drawer. On the cover is a large peony pattern that has been corroded by time, although it is old, but it is very clean. Carefully opening the diary, looking at the pages one by one extremely carefully, the vicissitudes of life and powerful words appeared like a river, sometimes torrenting, sometimes continuous. The moment I closed the diary, I couldn't hide the excitement in my heart, as if that snowy night more than ten years ago was in front of me:

On a snowy night, the starry sky was blown by the bitter wind, and the mother and housekeeper were exhausted by the wedding customs. On the wedding night, which is full of love, the groom sees off friends and relatives with a smile on his face, while the bride shyly sits on the side of the bed without saying a word. Some drunken grooms swayed to the bride's side, pulled the corners of the bride's rose-red clothes, signaled that it was late at night, and did not waste this beautiful day, and then pressed the bride's body to make love.

"Don't." The bride immediately pushed away the groom's tall and heavy body in shame, as if to shatter the groom's long-brewing enthusiasm, and then he was stunned by it.

"I want to explain one thing to you, I hope you can forgive me, and I don't want to deceive you, I only found out when I was getting married two days ago? I'm alone and don't know what to do......"

The bride wanted to continue explaining, but was interrupted by the drunken groom, who smiled, "What are you talking about?" Although the question was brief, he then put on a condensed expression.

"I ...... I...... I'm pregnant. ”

"What?" The groom immediately jumped up from the bed, and immediately became angry, triggering the crown, and his face instantly turned from ruddy to bruised. He rolled up his sleeves and stepped over to the bride, grabbed the bride's arm, and asked, "Whose child is it?" You tell me I'm going to kill him. ”

"The child is...... It's the one with a bad heart. ”

The negative man in the bride's mouth refers to the man who did not know the groom before, because he insisted on becoming a soldier, so he left everything and left. Later, I was introduced to the current groom. Because in the more feudal era at that time, it was immoral for a woman to get pregnant before marriage, and she would be spurned by others. After wanting to get to know the groom, he staged a mistake, and he didn't know it. But in the short time they got along, she found that she was in love with the loyal and honest man in front of her, and she wanted to muster up the courage to tell him the truth several times, but every time the words came to her mouth, it was difficult to speak, so she put it off again and again.

It wasn't until the wedding night that I had to cry and confess the truth. As long as it is a man, he can't accept this kind of thing with a broad mind, and finally the groom shows his intolerable attitude with a sentence of "You can be born yourself, and you will never accept foreign aid", and then slammed the door and left.

The groom's departure kept the bride awake all night, crying until the next day, when the sky was bright, and she went straight to the hospital in her wedding dress to get the baby out. The bride lay in the operating room and complained that the child had not come at the right time, so she strangled the two-month-old fetus with a normal fetal heart rate in her womb without any mercy.

Later, she dragged her weak body to the groom, hoping that she would be forgiven by the groom for what she had done. But in the long windswept alley, when the bridegroom saw the bride, whose face was bloodless and almost as pale as snow, he knelt in the thick snow and slapped himself twice in hatred. Tell the woman in front of you who has suffered too much about her love and helplessness. He laughed and said that fate was moody, even if he killed the child, he couldn't go back with the bride, and the fault was his foolish departure. Because the bridegroom also learned after leaving, it turned out that he also had a child, and it was still a child who accompanied the oath and could not be discarded.

In this way, the two mandarin ducks finally separated. When the bride dragged her numb body home, she was physically and mentally exhausted and desperate. When she discovers that there is a swaddling baby at the door that is about to be covered with snow, it is the baby wrapped inside that awakens the bride's desire for life. I don't know if the baby is hungry or cold, the crisp cry makes the bride feel distressed, and there is a delicate brocade box next to the swaddling clothes. The bride felt that the child she had endured to cut her love had come back to her, so she held the baby tightly in her arms, vowing that she would live well without a man......

The seemingly thick diary is full of too much unrelieved hatred of the old mother for the housekeeper, as if every handwriting is imprinted in her heart and cannot be erased.

When he was confused and wanted to break free from the era in the diary, his eyes suddenly lit up, and he almost ignored an important thing, according to the diary, isn't Long Shao the housekeeper's child? In that case, why was he still willing to saddle in front of Long Shao as the housekeeper of the mansion? What is the butler's helplessness?

Turning to the last page of the diary, I didn't find a single word, only the handwriting that had been dried by tears and turned into wrinkles was visible, it turned out that the night I left ruthlessly, she and the housekeeper said angry words, I was never a tool for my mother's revenge, but a small padded jacket that was a hundred times more kissed than my own daughter......

After reading this epic book containing the thousands of turns in my mother's life, I was full of tears, and it took a long time to calm down the emotional feelings that finally emerged from this long-buried truth.

I closed the door gently, the orchid's fingers moved slightly in the air, and with a "bang", all the furnishings in the room began to move in an orderly manner, each of which was less than five centimeters surrounded by a flood of light, which was slightly dazzling in the dim light, and the black reflection on the curtain was so free.

At this moment, the necklace in the brocade box also floated out to join in the fun, as if to remind me not to leave them behind. I stretched out my palm and saw the brocade box release a cloud of fairy energy before I took the necklace back, and then fell lightly on my palm. Of course I won't leave it, this necklace lives and dies with me, even though I don't know who I am, even if it's a wild child, I don't feel alone at this moment.