(Don't say one chapter a day.) This chapter is equal to two chapters. )

The black ends of the hair are almost covered by the eyes, giving it a somewhat gloomy look.

That was my first impression of her.

It was when I was nine years old, and that little square surrounded by residential buildings was always a place for the children of the neighborhood to play. I finished my mother's errand and was walking home with a bag of kitchen supplies.

"Stinky Tsubaki! Tree of heaven! Hahaha! ”

The laughter was filled with deep malice, and I looked over curiously, and it turned out that several boys of the same age were bullying people.

This kind of behavior is normal, and such a gloomy guy looks like a friendless type, or a new resident who has just moved here. If you bully, you are not afraid of someone to help, and as long as you don't go too far, you won't attract the attention of adults.

The boys didn't attack her, they just ran around her, sometimes approaching and then running away, shouting "Tsubaki, Tsubaki" while circling around to keep each other from leaving.

Looking at it this way, she looks very pitiful when she is bullied. I could only stand there, because the ends of my hair were too long to make out her expression. However, from the fact that she was standing motionless, I felt that she was afraid.

This kid had only recently moved to the neighborhood and happened to be my neighbor. I remember her parents as a very gentle couple and polite to everyone. Especially when I first moved next door, my family of three came to my house to say hello. At that time, through the introduction of her parents, I learned that her name was Lou Yu.

It is another name for the Tsubaki tree, which is also called Tsubaki because it emits a foul smell. And 樗 is another name for Tsubaki.

Probably one of these boys learned about this and made fun of her like that.

I'm not going to worry about it, my mother is still waiting for me to send it back. Besides, I don't like her gloomy appearance at all.

After a few more glances, I'm going to go back. But at this time, the boys began to throw stones at her. It's all the kind of pebbles, and you won't get hurt if you hit it. They laughed loudly as they threw it, "Stinky Tsubaki, Stinky Tsubaki".

And Lou Yu just squatted down and hugged his head, and let them commit violence without saying a word.

"Hey, stop it!"

When I reacted, I still spoke up. Without him, this scene reminded me of how I had been treated myself before. The love of the same enemy made me run over there.

Seeing me carrying a big bag, the leading man waved his hand in disgust: "Zhou Yan, don't worry about it!" ”

The impatient arrogance upset me, but I didn't dare to get angry at once when my mother warned me. And since I've already spoken out to help, I'll help people to the end.

"I'm going to take care of it!" I couldn't reason with him, I could only say things like that. After all, at that time, I was almost always taught to practice swords in the eyes of my mother, and I had very little time to communicate with others.

“CNM！” He cursed and pushed me, relying on being taller than me: "Wild seed! ”

Now he really me off, not because he pushed me, but because the swear words contained my mother. Well, that's the three-character scripture known as the national scolding.

I've been living with my mother since I was sensible. Other families have fathers, but I have never seen such a character appear in my life. Whenever I asked my mother out of envy, she would say that my father was on a trip.

But is there a father who doesn't come home once in a few years? When I was a child, I believed in my mother's words, and every day I would come home and see a man I had never seen before, and that man was my father. Even during that time, I was constantly perfecting the figure of a perfect father.

Sadly, until the end, I never met such a man.

I only have a mother, I value my mother, I like my mother. So, I hate it when people insult my mother, especially when it comes to my background.

Whenever the adults look at me, they show pity. When I was a kid, I didn't understand it, but now I'm starting to find that kind of look very stinging.

And this boy's last sentence "wild seed" completely touched my inferiority complex. Anger was like a raging wave, and it broke my heart in an instant. I threw down my pocket and threw myself at him.

There is no suspense in the result, I have been practicing swords for five years, and I surpass these boys of the same age in terms of body and skills. However, because I practiced swordsmanship and had never practiced fist and foot kung fu, I was still beaten several times when they swarmed up, but they were even worse.

The boys who couldn't beat me continued to swear and curse words like "wild seed, wild seed" as they ran. I was so angry that I chased them all the way until I beat everyone to tears and ran home.

Back to the place where she dropped the bag just now, Lou Yu was still standing there, she still looked gloomy.

The bags were on the ground, the things were scattered all over the ground, and many of them had been trampled on in the scuffle just now. I picked up everything and looked at the building. She's looking at me too.

Although I didn't do it to help her, I still had the illusion that I was the hero who saved her. But I was wrong, and there was no gratitude in her eyes. It was a pair of black and white eyes, eyes that could be full of aura, but because of her gloomy appearance, she looked dull and cold.

"Hey, you should say thank you!" The unexpected gratitude embarrassed me, who had planned to be a hero, and my tone was not so kind.

Then she said without gratitude, "Thank you." ”

But at that time, I didn't hear whether this sentence was emotional or not, and I happily accepted her apology, and then said with a great look: "In the future, they will bully you and find me, and I will protect you!" ”

It's just playing handsome, after all, she's a boy, and she's a girl no matter what.

However, when I got home, I was still given a good lecture by my mother. Not only did I break a lot of things I bought, but I was also approached by the boys with their parents.

Fortunately, I was beaten by their black fists in the melee, and my face was red and blue. And Lou Yu's parents also brought Lou Yu over to play the round. It didn't get serious, my mother asked me to apologize in public, and the boys reluctantly said "I'm sorry" at the request of their parents.

And so it went. But later, when the adults looked at me, they had a "sure enough" expression. I don't know what it was, but it was uncomfortable. was so stimulated that he secretly hid and cried.

I hated the man I hadn't met even more, and I felt like he was either dead or a bad man.

I'd rather he die, than if he was a man who abandoned his wife and children.

Later, when I told my mother about this idea, my mother, who had never been angry, became very angry. She asked me to pick up a sword to practice with her, and then mercilessly slapped red marks on me with her sword. Even when I cried and begged for mercy, my mother didn't stop.

My whole body was covered with red marks, and standing made me feel hot and painful all the time. I've never seen my mother angry, and the fear, pain, and grievances made me cry.

Seeing me crying like that, my mother finally didn't continue to beat me. She just threw the sword aside, touched my head, and said to me with a very serious expression, "Son, your father is still alive and well, and he is looking for something outside. ”

The mother's expression was so gentle and helpless. However, I had a huge resentment in my heart towards the man who didn't know whether he was in existence or not.

Even because of this, I decided that I wanted to be a good man. It's ridiculous to think about it now, it's just a few years old, and he doesn't know anything but dares to say that he wants to be a good man.

However, this obsession affected me for a long time later, and the result was that I obviously wanted to arm myself with an indifferent person, and I always unconsciously became a virgin.

After that, the boys' bullying of Lou Yu did not end. She always had that gloomy appearance, and she had a friend but me, and she didn't have any extra words even for me, the "savior".

Of course, I have never regarded her as a friend, in fact, although I have not expressed myself to her, I feel superior to her in my heart.

When she was being bullied and I saw it, I would help her get rid of the boys who were bullying her. But the result is that she will be bullied even worse after that.

What textbooks have been torn up, garbage has been stuffed into school bags, water has been pretended to have been accidentally splashed with mop, and people have pretended to have accidentally knocked it over......

And she didn't cry once, and that gloomy appearance made people feel more and more annoying. Among those who hated her was me.

But I said that I wanted to protect her, even if it was just a big thing to say on a whim, but because of my vow to "be a good man" at that time, I decided to be with her as much as possible to protect her.

Anyway, apart from going to school and going to and from school to get home, I basically spent my time practicing swords.

When I walked with her, she ignored me. Her hair was already covering her eyes, and I wondered if she could still see the road ahead.

Because I was bored, I would sometimes talk to her, but she walked forward with her head as if she couldn't hear. Such an attitude made me almost learn the nickname of "stinky tun" from those boys more than once, but fortunately, I finally regarded myself as a "protector" and a "hero", and my vanity made me hold back.

Having me made her get bullied less often. I feel a sense of accomplishment as a result. Even the gloomy personality towards her makes me less annoying.

And later, somehow, I got used to going home with her. This continued until the end of elementary school.

Graduated from primary school, that is, after the age of twelve. My mother suddenly told me that I didn't need to spend so much time practicing my sword every day. Time came out and left me feeling idle.

During the summer vacation of junior high school, I was accosted while wandering on the street. The conversation was accosted by a young and beautiful girl, who was full of energy, and her jet-black hair was tied into a common ponytail and put on the back of her head. Those aura-filled eyes were bent like the moon in the sky.

"Zhou Yan!" She patted me on the shoulder from behind and greeted me with a grin.

But I didn't know who she was. Yes, I don't know who she is, I don't know such a beautiful girl. Although it feels a little familiar, but a careful search of the girl I know in my mind does not have her. As for Lou, I filtered it out at the beginning.

She didn't talk to me much, and when I looked confused, she smiled and walked away. I haven't seen her since—until school starts.

At the beginning of junior high school, the class was asked to introduce themselves. Of course I noticed her at the beginning, and she beckoned like me when she spotted me. I was flattered by this.

"Hello everyone, my name is Lou Yu, please help me more in my studies and life in the future." She smiled nicely and generously introduced herself.

That's right, she's Lou Yu. Both me and everyone else was shocked. In particular, most of the students in this class are actually people they have known since elementary school.

Is she really Lou Yu? Isn't it someone with the same name and surname? I think everyone had the same question at the time.

I don't know what happened, but when I was in junior high school, Lou Yu was completely transformed. No, it's not a transformation, it's like a completely different person. It feels like it's not the same person inside and out.

This young and beautiful girl with a cheerful smile is the gloomy and taciturn Lou Yu? Is it the girl who was called "stinky tsubaki, stinky toon"?

I felt like I had been hit by a huge shock.

And she is very close to me. This closeness made my doubts disappear. Anyway, Lou Yu at that time was no longer the annoying appearance she used to be, but a beautiful girl. Because of her closeness, my vanity was greatly satisfied, and I did not ask why she had changed so much.

Because the two families are neighbors, we will still set off together and go home together.

And now, on the way, she no longer walks silently with her head down. They would talk and laugh with me, and occasionally force me to wander around the street before going home.

The way she looks like this even makes me forget for a while that she used to be so gloomy and silent.

And although I felt very abrupt and strange at that time, I was only twelve years old at that time, so I didn't have time to think about it so much.

When I could think later, I didn't bother to think because I had begun to get used to this cheerful and generous her.

When she told her mother about it, she just smiled and said, "Yes, the child has finally become cheerful." ”

But there was some kind of indescribable love in the mother's eyes, which was a sigh. I didn't understand why my mother sighed and didn't think much about it.

Of course, little by little, I began to care about this cheerful and lively building. Then began to have a crush on her.

No way, such a cheerful, lively and beautiful girl was too lethal for me at that time.

And it's not just me, in fact, even among the boys who bullied her back then, there were many people who had a crush on her.

I was also teased in private, saying that I must have known that Lou Yu would become like this before I helped her. But the conscience of heaven and earth, I really don't know.

In my second year of junior high school, Zhu'er (as I called her in private at her request) told me that her family was also a martial arts family, and she showed me boxing.

And when I told my mother about it, my mother nodded as a matter of course: "I know." ”

When I asked my mother when she knew, she told me that I knew in the first place.

Well, although I think my mother lied to me, I don't dare to say it directly. Otherwise, you will definitely be dragged to sparring and then be hurt (hanged) and loved (beaten) well.

After that, I occasionally played with her. Of course, this kind of exchange is done without the help of others. Because of her training with me, my growth accelerated a little bit at that time. And we will coach each other, and she also taught me the basic boxing skills.

As time passed, I cared more and more about her, but I didn't have the courage to confess anything. Because at that time, she was cheerful and generous, beautiful and excellent. can have a good relationship with everyone.,It's the crush of almost all the boys in the class and even the boys in the outside class.。

She is no longer the gloomy ugly duckling, now she is a white swan standing tall above her. Even though she was still very close to me, she even thanked me once and thanked me for helping her out.

But after knowing that she also knew martial arts, I always felt that I was nosy. I felt more embarrassed than proud of her thanks.

If I keep going like this, maybe I will finally muster up the courage to confess to her someday in the future. And if she likes me too, maybe we can get together.

However, there are no ifs. No one could have imagined that such a thing would happen.

After graduating from junior high school and entering the first year of high school, she and I were already sixteen years old. At that time, whether it was me or others, they had already begun to forget the gloomy and gloomy children. After all, compared to that her, she is still more acceptable now.

However, one day, she did not come to class. When I got home from class, I saw that the door next door was opened, and the cordon had been pulled outside. There are police officers coming in and out. There are also some good people watching.

I walked into my house with a look of curiosity. When I saw the police and the cordon, I sensed something was wrong.

I immediately asked my mother, and I still remember the mixture of impatience and fear.

I heard from my mother that there was a violent attack on her home, and the murderer's method of killing was extremely cruel. The Lu'er family was beaten alive into meat sauce.

When I first heard the news, I went crazy and wanted to rush into Yu'er's house to confirm the truth, but my mother stopped me.

Then, in a whirlwind, I fainted.

I can't take such a blow, but it's true. In fact, the news spread quickly, and the news of Zhu'er's death and what happened to her family has been full of turmoil in the city.

Why is this happening? Why does this have to happen?

I don't know if it was to comfort me, but my mother told me that this was the evil act of a certain cult group. In fact, the police finally came to such a conclusion, because some suspected sacrificial objects were found in Zhu'er's house.

However, in the end, no one knew exactly where the cult had gone. Somehow she disappeared forever. What the hell is this?

Why did she have to do this? Why should the murderer of unknown people still get away with it? Why must she be the one who died?

It was a question and a resentment that arose in my heart countless times for a long, very long time after that.

However, after graduating from high school at the age of eighteen, I was home alone during the summer vacation. I heard someone shouting at me outside the door. That's the voice of the child.

Yes, it's been two years, but I can't be mistaken. Not an illusion! The incredulity and a certain fear of the unknown made me rush to the door and open it without hesitation.

Then when I reacted, I had already appeared in another world. But where is the barberry?

The one who called me outside the door must be Yu'er. I crossed inexplicably, but what about the canopy outside the door? I wanted to go back, but I couldn't do it. No! I must go back, perhaps, I can see her again.

In order to meet Zhu'er, in order to return to the original world, I promised a princess in this world that I would exchange the opportunity to return with her with a sacred object called "Tears of the Goddess......

The above are my memories and my childhood sweetheart. I like her very much.