Why is the relationship between men and women so complicated, starting with joy and ending with resentment, is there no sweetness until old age? If this is a high requirement, then it can always be done by walking together in a bland way, right?

Shu believes that treating a partner as a strategic partner will solve many problems. First of all, you will respect your partner and keep a proper distance and give each other a little space.

Like the kind of irrational situation between you and your partner when you fall in love and get married, treat your partner as a private product, like a conjoined baby when the relationship is good, and want to strangle each other when the relationship is bad? Obviously not, so it is extremely unreasonable to say that loving someone is equivalent to giving him the right to hurt you.

Hurting in the name of love is the most hateful, and you can't forget about politeness and politeness just because you are loved by someone or love someone.

I remember a book that said that true love is to make yourself a better person. Shu Neem deeply thinks that if that person dominates your joys, sorrows, and sorrows, but makes you feel unhappy, and you are tired by negative and gray feelings every day, trapped in a messy life and cannot be free, it is better not to have such love.

Lu Lujin immediately decided to cut off the love thread, at first glance, she felt that she was too rational and realistic, and she broke up categorically when there was a contradiction, leaving no room for anything, someone insisted on it for love, but she took great strides back, how stark the contrast is, is she not loving enough, that is not necessarily, it can only show that she loves herself more.

On a certain Cheng dù, Shu Neem understands Lu Lujin, what does Zhu Ziteng say, he is careful and considerate to his lover, as long as he is willing, he can spoil you to the sky. But it's a bit indecisive and obedient to his parents. Who would have imagined that a man in his thirties has no financial autonomy, and his income is in the hands of his parents, because his parents think that their son is honest and pure, and they are afraid that the ghost girls with many eyes will cheat their son out of money.

Because of this, Shu Neem didn't want to ask Zhu Ziteng to borrow money, his parents even had to take care of him overspending every month, if he borrowed a large amount of money to go out, wouldn't they be in a trouble.

The premise of sticking to love is that you can see hope, like Zhu Ziteng obviously doesn't give people hope, and it is only a matter of time before Lu Lujin breaks up with him.

Secondly, you don't expect too much from your partner, and you apply this tolerance to your partner, what contradictions and disputes can't be resolved?

Finally, what are the reasons why you chose someone to be your partner? Hobbies, interests, values, interests? The same applies to lovers, a lifetime is so long, if you don't even have a common topic, how can you have a life? How will we not get tired of seeing each other?

Then try to discover the connection points with each other, so that you will have new understandings and discoveries about the people around you every day, and life will be a little interesting so that you will not get bored.

The above is Shu Neem's view of marriage and love, whenever female friends quarrel with the other half because of trivial family matters, they like to complain to her, and the pattern is usually like this: love xù excitedly counts her husband's crimes, complains about this and complains about that, and wantonly vents the dissatisfaction and resentment in her heart.

And Shu Neem only needs to play the role of a competent mental garbage bin, if she gives her emotional outlook to her friend and analyzes the crux of her relationship situation, there is □□ chance that she will anger her friend and turn the muzzle upside down:

"The family doesn't talk to each other, I'm sick and polite to my husband, what? Freedom, distance, space, independence...... Bullshit! What do you want to marry freely? I have a demand for him, and that's because he is my man, and I can take care of irrelevant people! ”

"Shu Neem, I didn't say you, your thinking is very dangerous, be careful that you can't marry for the rest of your life! Your selfish thinking has to be changed, ouch, I'm worried about you, this person can't be single for too long, and if you look at you again, you're all on a fork in the road! ”

There are also friends who said bluntly: "You don't have a backache when you stand and talk, can you make it clear that it is still called feelings, two people live together, there are no pots and pans without touching the pans, bumps and bumps are inevitable, there are a few pairs like you said in such an ideal state." ”

"Isn't there a song that is still sung, how much love can be said clearly, and how much is confused and confused...... I think about it, when I was a child, the theme song of the TV series was addicted to death, confused love, you have never been in love and you have never been married, so don't be involved in other people's emotional problems! ”

Shu Neem was beeping what was going on in her heart, didn't they come to ask for comfort and enlightenment first, she proposed a solution for their reference, but in turn she choked.

Later, Shu Neem understood that they hoped to stand in line and help their mother-in-law when they denounced their husbands, instead of pointing fingers at their lifestyles to add to the blockage.

Ah, what a painful realization! Since then, whenever the girlfriend complains about the grievance, Shu Neem is honest, closes his mouth with his ears, what his friends say, and adds a universal saying: "No matter what, he loves you, don't be angry when you go home, your relationship is more important than anything-"

As for the real point of view, Shu Neem put it on the topic of neem wood, at least she can choke back on this self-reserved land, otherwise she will really suffocate to death.

When I got home, Shu Neem had already conceived the content of the neem column, opened the notebook, tapped the keyboard with ten fingers, and after a short time, the manuscript was completed in one go, checked it, and Shu Neem emailed it to the column editor.

After the completion, Shu Neem suddenly became idle, the crash finally came to an end, and when she gathered the money to understand the matter, I hope that the bad luck period will end soon, don't they all say that the bad luck is coming to an end, and good luck will come naturally?

The sun was scorching outside, and Shu Neem was not happy to go out to forage for food, so she ordered takeout, going back and forth to the same old routine, and she was tired of eating. She plans to do it herself, and on a hot day, it is most suitable to eat cold noodles to relieve the heat.

Shu Neem turned to the kitchen, boiled the water in the pot over high heat, put the konjac noodles, boiled them softly, quickly picked them up and blanched them twice with cold water, and took them out and put them in a stoneware noodle bowl, only to find that the cucumbers had not been shredded. Shu Neem's cooking feeling is okay, but the knife work is a little worse, and it took a little effort to cut the shreds finely.

Sauce is the soul of cold noodles, neem according to their own preferences, sesame oil, vinegar, sugar, chicken essence, red pepper oil, garlic paste into juice, sprinkle sesame seeds and cucumber shreds together and pour them on the cold noodles and stir well, sauce beef and spicy cabbage are ready-made, take out from the refrigerator with cold noodles to eat the most appetizing.

The taste is spicy and sour, and it seems that her cooking skills are quite good, and Shu Neem is smug.

The mood of brushing the dishes and cleaning up the kitchen is completely opposite to when eating, Shu Neem hates the greasy feeling, and also cleans the stove and range hood, China has a history of 5,000 years, and women have been rotating around the pot for at least 3,000 years, which is really not easy. Some men are not satisfied with the all-weather service of their wives, and they grind their women into yellow-faced women and split their legs, and feed their three views and conscience to the dogs.

Somehow, Shu thought of a piece of gossip about the apartment building, flowing out of the elevator room. A trench on the 28th floor wants to divorce his wife, and his daughter, who went to college, is unmoved by the pleading, saying that he has suffered and finally met true love, and he must experience love well.

The old wife was like ashes, fought for a set of shops and apartments, and quickly made room for the little three, and the little three quickly gave birth to a son after taking the position, but the trench was very happy, as long as it was the resident of the apartment, each family made a profit, and congratulated him on the joy of having a son.

"Look at his nouveau riche face, his ex-wife is also stupid, and he won't divorce if he dies, why should he give way to the mistress? What did he rely on to make his fortune, isn't it his ex-wife's mother's family who posted money, good guy, when he is developed, he turns his face and doesn't recognize people? Who accompanied him all the way when he was in trouble? ”

"Tell me to say, it's all this age, look at it, you should eat and eat, you should eat and flower, and let him go with one eye closed, if you make trouble with him, you will break this matter, isn't it a cheap woman outside?"

"Yes, just the 28th floor of Chen Shimei, the little three hurt like eyeballs, that's it, then the third is still doing, let Chen Shimei arrange a position for her mother's relatives in the company, our family said, Chen Shimei is dizzy, and if you can't keep the family property, you have to ask outsiders to calculate, whether the son is not his or not is not certain, these three children and he also had a good time with a logistics boss, and he was in the outer room for a while, that lady is amazing, and after knowing it, he will find someone to follow this three-guess what?"

Shu Mei, who was standing in the corner of the elevator at the time, pricked up his ears, "These three have a little white face, and the logistics boss knows that he will share it with her without saying a word, and it is also a good means to hook up with Chen Shimei on the 28th floor not long before and after, but I think this Chen Shimei is happy to be a father with green heads!" ”

It's so happy, the rest of the grandmothers slapped and laughed, "You deserve it, don't want your daughter, raise a son for someone else, and have a day when he is in the world!" ”

Shu Neem was deeply impressed by the ex-wife on the 28th floor, it is said that she has become a rich lady, no matter how frugal she is, she also has one or two clothes and shoes and bags that fill the façade, this ex-wife is very simple, and she wears some common brands. The family did not hire a nanny to take care of the eighty-year-old demented mother-in-law, and it was a first-class good in terms of filial piety, but this Chinese-style virtuous and good daughter-in-law still did not escape the end of the bad chaff.

It's sad to think about, but on the other hand, it's angry that a woman's selfless dedication in family life is not recognition, but indifference. Men take your contribution for granted, and self-righteously feel that it can't be compared with their contribution to the family, how many men divorce and shout that their property is their hard-earned money, why give half of their wealth to a woman who is about to have no relationship.

Sadly, while the man is rationally striving for a result that is beneficial to him, the woman is still asking in pain, why doesn't he love me anymore, why does he abandon me?

It's terrible to lose yourself in a relationship, and Shu Neem asks herself if she will become unselfish in a relationship and humbly look up to others? Just assuming is uncomfortable.

Shu Neem felt that she might never take someone as the center of gravity of her life and become a princess.

Sacrificing oneself to achieve others, or sacrificing others to achieve oneself, in family life, out of love, many women choose the former, and I hope that life will treat them well.

What exactly is love? Shu Neem looked at the falling sun and thought, maybe the girlfriends have a point, the child is not a fish, and he knows the joy of fish.

At least their troubles are still in the realm of spiritual life, which is much higher than her material troubles.