It is estimated that no one will be too happy except for children in this year.

Border relations were very tense long ago, and the sudden outbreak of war made many families with children on the battlefield very silent, and there was no atmosphere for the New Year at all.

In the place where she lived, there were also men who were soldiers in the army, and the old lady of the family cried anxiously when she heard that the war had started, for fear that her son would have an accident on the battlefield, and almost cried over the fifteenth day of the new year.

This year was spent by Liu Xiaping alone.

Even Ling Huasheng, the public security officer, suddenly disappeared more than ten days ago and never appeared again.

Originally, she also planned that if that person was also a person for the New Year, they could still set up a table to eat together, so it wasn't too lonely, but she didn't expect that guy to disappear when he said he would disappear.

But Liu Xiaping didn't perfunctory herself because of this.

She made herself two meat dishes, opened a bottle of liquor brought by Sister He Xiang, and placed three pairs of dishes and chopsticks on the table.

One is for himself, and the other two are for her husband and son An An in her previous life.

She still remembers that when the Chinese New Year was in the past, it was An An's favorite day, because she was able to receive a lot of New Year's money, and she was also able to eat a lot of big fish and meat that she was reluctant to eat on weekdays.

It's just that An An's least favorite thing is when she goes to her relatives to follow her back to her parents' house in the first and second days of junior high school, because his grandmother always likes to secretly keep all the delicious food for Liu Xiaxiu's son to eat, even if it is her own granddaughter, she doesn't have that treatment.

Liu Xiaping drank wine while sandwiching An An's favorite dish in the empty bowl he used to eat.

Her An An is a picky eater, but like her, she likes meat the most.

Especially the braised pork she makes, she can kill three bowls of white rice every time, and the food is delicious.

I also like to mash potatoes and eat them with rice, although I always dislike her mother for not cooking well, but every time she can eat the dishes she makes.

I remember one year, An An was still young, she didn't have a formal job at that time, so she could only go to the restaurant to help, and Han Yi had not quit the army yet, and often didn't go home.

An An always stayed alone in that twenty or thirty square meters, crowded home waiting for her to come home from work, as long as she heard the sound of her opening the door, she would immediately run to the bed and make a look of falling asleep.

The little guy always thinks that he is hiding it well, and even secretly pours her a cup of hot water when she is very tired, pretends to take a sip and drops the cup and leaves.

At that time, her An An seemed to be only seven years old, right?

And then?

Liu Xiaping took a sip of wine and stared at the pair of chopsticks that had never been touched in a daze.

Later, her An An was forcibly picked up by Chen Yu.

said that he missed his grandson, and he disliked them for being too busy as parents, and he was afraid that the child would be bored at home alone.

She was reluctant to leave An An's side, so she called Han Yi, but he agreed.

At first, An An was kind to her, and every time she went back, she would run over and hug her legs and tell her about what happened at school.

But when did An An start to be cold to her?

Liu Xiaping's eyes were red, but she laughed, "I know...... That old woman said in front of you that your mother doesn't want you anymore......"

What else do seven or eight-year-olds understand?

But didn't people teach him, did he slowly believe it?

Especially those who taught him, one was his own grandmother, even if his grandmother was never willing to spend money on a piece of clothing on him, and the other was his own aunt, even if his aunt always spoke ill of his mother.

"I miss you so much...... I really miss you......" Liu Xiaping muttered in a low voice to the empty bowl, she seemed to have returned to the previous life, the days when Han Yi had just died.

For the first time, her An An was so broken in front of her and said the grievances that had been suppressed in her heart for so many years, she couldn't imagine how a child who was only seventeen years old hid so many grievances in her heart, and what kind of mood did her An An feel when she watched other people's children coquettish their parents?

What made her hate even more was the dream.

The real horror is a warning from God, so that she almost believes that her An An is really forced to death!

Liu Xiaping didn't know if she was crying, she just knew that she kept putting vegetables on the empty bowl.

In this world, her An An has not yet been born, and it is she who completely deprives An An of the opportunity to be born in this world!

Liu Xiaping almost laughed and cried, in her previous life, she ruined the child's childhood, and in this life, she deprived the child of the right to live.

Because she had never been so aware of what was going on in her heart.

It is really impossible between Han Yi and her, even if it is really a good husband, even if she owes this man in her previous life, she is not willing to walk with this person again.

Her life is too hard, and she hasn't met a good mother, so isn't that dream a punishment for her?

watched the piece of meat that fell from his body, and how he was forced to a desperate situation step by step by self-blame and pain.

kept reaching out to him to ask for money, one was his grandmother, the other was her own grandmother, obviously a continuation of the bloodline, and he was a boy who was regarded as a treasure in other people's homes, but why did he come here and become a talisman?

"Because...... It's all debt...... Hehe......"

Liu Xiaping suddenly picked up An An's dishes and chopsticks, put them in front of her, and put the part that belonged to Han Yi in front of her, and the three bowls overlapped together, as if the first sweet days of her previous life.

It was the only time for the family of three to be rare and quiet, and it was also the most unforgettable day in her memory.

Liu Xiaping hugged the bowl, tears kept dripping into the bowl, "I'm sorry, I'm really sorry......"

She was too weak, too selfish.

It's okay to be stupid, but it's good that she can bear any sin alone!

Her An An is the most innocent one, and all retribution should not happen to him.

An An, I followed my mother in my previous life and suffered for a lifetime, in this life you will be someone else's child, it is my incompetence that will harm you for a lifetime, I am not a qualified mother, and I am not qualified to be your mother......

On Chinese New Year's Eve, Liu Xiaping held a wine bottle and ate two dishes from 1979 to 1980.

That night, she was alone at home, crying heartbreakingly at the moon hanging in the sky.

(To be continued.) )