Today is the thirtieth day of the lunar month, and Govin has been staying at Ba Lao's house for one night.

Since the 28th day of the lunar month, after being dragged to the foundation by Lin Yiming, Gewen remembered that he was going to spend the New Year at Ba Lao's house this year.

So after sending off the postal car carrying the inaugural issue of "Tongpao", he hurried to the Jiangdong farm, from where he got more than a dozen quails, hens, and eggs, along with some relatively rare books that he had mailed back from Beijing earlier, to his old home.

I just went, and I was taught a lesson by Ba Lao and Sister Xiaolin, what little red guy doesn't like the old man and the like, what is not the old man who doesn't come over, what is not hiding in the house, etc., Gewen finally appeased the two of them.

And Govin also saw Ba Lao's son Li Xiaotang for the first time.

Li Xiaotang has been working in the editorial office of the Shanghai CPPCC since graduating from Fudan University, and usually lives in the dormitory, he doesn't want his identity to be known to the public, so he rarely comes back on weekdays, and Gewen and he have never had a chance to meet. The Chinese New Year is approaching, and there are almost no visitors to the house, so Li Xiaotang went home.

On the twenty-ninth day of the lunar month, Govin spent it with the old family.

Ba Lao and Sister Xiaolin are very familiar with Gowen, and have never treated him as an outsider, and Li Xiaotang is also extremely kind, not only calling Gowen brother, but also grasping him to discuss literature and historical culture.

Govin felt very relaxed, and for a moment, he really thought that this was his home.

That night, when everyone sat together and chatted, Govin talked about his recent creation of "Bright Sword", and when Govin said that one of the purposes of his creation was to reflect on the buzzing history, Ba Lao was very curious, and like an old naughty boy, he asked Govin to quickly bring the manuscript, he wanted to read it. On the other hand, Li Xiaotang also coaxed.

If it weren't for Sister Xiaolin's great power, I'm afraid that Govin would have rushed back to get the manuscript overnight. Even so, Govin had to get up early in the morning of the 31st day of the lunar month to get the manuscript.

No way, who made him a disciple of Ba Lao.

At this moment, the absent-minded Govin finally put the magazine in his hand that he didn't even look at on the coffee table.

Then his gaze stared straight at the old man opposite.

The old man's mentality is very good, but his body suddenly began to deteriorate sharply from the second half of 84 years, and he also spent a period of time in the hospital in the second half of the year. His hair was still as gray as before, but his hands were even more dry, and his face was thinner than before.

At this moment, the old man's emaciated face was flushed, and his eyes were staring at the manuscript in his hand.

Startled, Govin squeaked, quickly got up from the moved rattan chair, and rushed to Ba Lao's side in a few steps.

The loud noise did not alarm Ba Lao, who remained in his original position.

Govin's gaze passed through the side of Pa Lao's face and fell on the manuscript in his hand—

……

Zhao Gang looked at Feng Nan with an extremely complicated eye, and sighed in his mouth: "We have lived for more than ten years, and you have always played the role of a gentle wife in front of me, almost ignoring the other side of you, do you want to show your sword edge until the last moment?" It's really a late strike......"

Feng Nan showed a sad smile and said, "Character is fate. I have no power to change you, the only thing I can do is to be with you until death. ”

Zhao Gang shed tears bitterly: "It's pointless for you to do this, this is deliberately indebted to my conscience, why don't you give me some free space?" Give me some power to choose? ”

"Zhao Gang, do you know the Decembrists in Russia?"

"Of course, it was also a group of idealistic revolutionaries."

"I'm thinking about the Decembrists in Russia, I'm thinking about their wives, what a bunch of noble women. After the failure of the Decembrist uprising, they were exiled to Siberia by the Tsar, and their wives were faced with two choices: either they broke off their husbands and remained in Peter as a nobleman. Either they were deprived of their nobility and accompanied their husbands to Siberia for hard labor. These noble, effeminate women showed great courage and resolutely chose the latter. Dostoevsky was moved to tears, and he said: They have abandoned all their nobility, wealth, social and family membership, and have sacrificed everything for the sake of high moral deeds and for the sake of freedom. Innocent of them have endured what their 'criminal husbands' have endured for twenty-five long years...... You see, more than a hundred years have passed, and in the minds of the people, those heroic Decembrists are not as perfect as the historical image of their wives. The wives of the Decembrists became a group, a symbol of heroism, and history remembers these great women. You know, if there is no you in this world, my life is meaningless, and the loneliness of my mind and the nostalgia for you will also kill me, remember? When I first met you, I really knew what love at first sight is. Then I thought, thank God, this man is a gift from God. ”

Zhao Gang gently hugged his wife and looked around the living room, after the house was raided, the living room was unrecognizable, the collection of books was torn into piles of waste paper, and the big photo of him wearing a dress and wearing the rank of major general was crossed red.

He smiled softly: "Life is really like a dream......"

"Tell me, back then, you threw your pen into Rong, threw yourself into a revolution, and after decades of conquest and killing, you ended up like this, do you regret it?" Feng Nan asked.

"I don't regret it, I did my duty as a Chinese, when the nation was in danger and the strong enemy was pressing, and it was impossible for any bloody Chinese to stay out of the matter. In the face of the aggressor, we did not disgrace the Chinese soldiers. As for the war that overthrew the rule of the Kuomintang, I am proud to have participated in that war. It was a dictatorial, unpopular, and corrupt government, and that government would not collapse without the intolerable nature of heaven. I fought in two wars in my life and did what I wanted to do. Nothing to regret. ”

Zhao Gang couldn't help but burst into tears, he wiped away his tears and said: "I think of Mr. Tian, ten years ago, it was in this house that I had a heart-to-heart talk with Mr. Tian, and now I think about it, Mr. Tian is really a rare wise man, and his vision can really see the future through the fog." Ten years ago, he feared a catastrophe for our nation, and now he is unfortunate enough to be right. I see that revolution is perhaps a neutral word. It can lead people to the light, or it can create human disasters in the name of revolution. Revolutions must conform to universal moral principles, i.e., the principles of humanity, and if they are indifferent or indifferent to individual lives, or even cause bloodshed and death for no reason, the so-called revolution is of a dubious nature, no matter how beautiful it may be. I now finally understand Ding's cry from Gorky: Let's make everyone more humane in these days of universal bestiality...... It is impossible to be a revolutionary without rejecting humanity, without love and compassion. Feng Nan, I don't have the ability to stop the spread of the disaster, but I have the ability to defend my dignity, and without dignity, I'd rather die! ”

"This life is enough, the wind sweeps the sea, the waves are horizontal, the boaters are magnificent, and the waves of life and death are not magnificent? The smoke and flames of war, the fight of a hundred battles, the joy of victory, the grief of the deceased friend, the cold face of the strong enemy, the beautiful scenery of the gentle countryside, the interweaving of joy and pain, the companionship of youth, friendship and love...... What more could you ask for in this life? ……”

Zhao Gang opened his eyes, his eyes were shining, he patted Feng Nan's back, and said softly: "Hey, it's time for the Decembrists to hit the road, dawn is a good time to hit the road." ”

Feng Nan was already in tears at this time, she hugged Zhao Gang violently and cried bitterly: "Zhao Gang, I'm afraid, this is a piece of my heart, I'm just afraid that when our body disappears, my soul will also drift away, without you, I'm too lonely." ”

Zhao Gang smiled and said, "Don't worry, I will hold you tightly, I can't run away if I want to." ”

Feng Nan wiped away her tears and showed a childlike smile on her face: "Really? You're going to tell me how to count, reassure me. ”

She gently picked up Zhao Gang and said, "Let's go, my dear Decembrists, we are going to Siberia in the snowy ......."

……

When he got closer, Govin found that Ba Lao was not only clutching the manuscript in his hand with both hands, but also the cheeks of his face that looked down were rising and falling rapidly.

The old man has brought in his own emotions?!

Govin had to start calling Ba Lao's name softly, "Ba Lao, Ba Lao...... Are you okay? ”

Hearing Gowen's worried voice, he finally put down the manuscript in his hand, took off the glasses from his face, and struggled to get up from his desk.

Govin hurriedly picked him up.

"Xiaowen, help me to the yard." Ba Lao's voice was a little old, and he was even more choked.

"Okay."

Govin helped Ba Lao put on his coat, and then helped Ba Lao out of the sun room, turning in circles in the yard without purpose.

Holding Ba Lao's arm, Govin could clearly feel that Ba Lao's mood must not be calm at this time, because his thin arm was still shaking gently, as if he was convulsing after crying for a long time.

After walking in the yard for a while, the two of them came to the magnolia tree in the garden.

At this time, although it is winter, the magnolia tree is still lush, but the leaves are a little yellow, and in another month or two, when spring comes, all the leaves on the tree will fall off, and then new shoots will be born.

Ba Lao stopped, he looked up at the magnolia tree, and remained silent.

Govyn stood aside, also silent.

After a long time, Ba Lao's calm voice finally came out-

"I only got married when I was 40 years old. At that time, the wedding with your wife Yunzhen was extremely simple, there was no ceremony and no table for a banquet. Since then, your wife has lived with me in poverty and displacement. In the year of the victory of the Anti-Japanese War in 45 years, your sister Xiaolin was born. After the founding of the People's Republic of China, my work and social activities increased day by day, and I was very busy, and I was always away from home for several months of the year. Everything in the family is controlled by your wife, and it is not easy to take care of the old and the young. ”

"During the Cultural Revolution, during the years when I was criticized, Yunzhen, as my wife, was also imprisoned in the cowshed, hung up with the card of 'Cow Ghost Snake God', was sent to sweep the streets, was abused and tortured by the unreasonable people around her, she was broken by the copper head belt of the Red Guards, and came back to lie to me that she accidentally fell and injured herself...... I have always regretted that I did not stay by her side when she was dying, I regret that I did not hear her last words, and I regret that there are many things that I did not pour out to her. ”

“…… Before Yun Zhen entered the operating room for surgery, she said to me for the first and last time in her life: It seems that we are going to separate! Listening to Yunzhen's words, I was heartbroken, I gently covered her mouth with my hand, lowered my head and kissed her, I was in tears, and she was also in tears...... To this day, I remember her lying in a hospital bed. She was very quiet, but not lethargic, and kept her eyes wide open. I looked and looked as if I were looking at a candle flame that was about to burn out. How I want these eyes to stay forever, how I fear her leaving me......"

Ba Lao told the story of him and his lover without logic and purpose, and his tone was choked and trembling.

Govyn's heart was terrified, and he had never seen this state of Ba Lao again. For a moment, he was very worried that Ba Lao would not fall down like this.

After a few times of wanting to speak and stopping, Govin finally mustered up the courage to persuade him: "Ba Lao, don't say it, the deceased cannot be chased, the body is important!" ”

"After Yunzhen died, it took three years before I brought her ashes back! Now Yun Zhen's ashes are in my bedroom, and I always have Yun Zhen's translation at the head of my bed, and every time I think of her, I will pick up a book and read it, and when I look at it, I feel that Yun Zhen is back again, looking at me, talking to me, smiling at me......" Ba Lao did not stop his words, he muttered to himself, and he didn't know whether to say it to Govern, or to the intimate lover who was separated by yin and yang.

After a long time, the old man fell into deep thought again, and several tears were falling on the dry grass in front of the old man.

Govin was really scared.

He didn't dare to alarm Ba Lao now, and he wanted to ask Sister Xiaolin and Li Xiaotang for help, but he didn't dare to leave.

Fortunately, I don't know how long it took, Ba Lao collected his emotions.

He turned around, looked at Govin with red eyes, and said, "Let your boy see the joke." Watching "Bright Sword", I unconsciously thought of your wife...... It's all to blame that paragraph you kid wrote was too sensational! Remember not to talk to you Sister Xiaolin and Xiaotang for a while. ”

"Got it, I won't say it!" Like a schoolboy, Govin nodded solemnly, but he breathed a long sigh of relief in his heart.

The true feelings of Ba Lao before really frightened him!

……

……

There was no update yesterday.,When I uploaded the last chapter just now,,I found that the average subscription data has actually increased by more than a dozen!

It turns out that it is not updated, but it can also be ordered!

I want to cry again.

Here, please be able to support all the subscriptions, only when the average subscription rises, the big era can enter the eyes of the editors, and will not be buried.

Please order it all! (To be continued.) )