I don't want to write about taking a day off tonight. Pen & Fun & Pavilion www.biquge.info

There is no motivation or inspiration to write new chapters to update the ...... Owe a chapter, people are a little tired.

Tell me my story, everyone should think of this chapter as my mood talk, or a journal.

In 2010, I was out of school, so I dropped out of school and started studying music to pursue my dream. At that time, I thought that people can't live like a salted fish, people must have dreams, and I look down on anyone who doesn't have dreams!

That year, I was 15!

Reality has struck me head-on, but society has taught me that dreams are a fart. A philosopher was invented in his heart, and the philosopher said: Dreams are meant to be shattered!

At the age of 15, I started my musical journey with a guitar on my back.

Write your own songs, arrange your own songs, and sing your own songs. I thought that Lao Tzu was the first in the world, but all kinds of original musicians on 5sing told me: You are a trash.

After 11 years, the dream of original music that had lasted for a year was shattered. But I still firmly believe that hard work will always pay off. Exiting the front desk and secluded behind the scenes, I became a music producer.

I began to learn music on my own, starting with composition, and learning it little by little. to computer arrangement, and then to post-mixing. I was 16 years old and already a music producer.

He worked as an arranger, composer, and sound engineer in the recording studio...... A gunslinger who worked as a gunslinger in a record company, made up a tune and sold it for hundreds of dollars, and was not named. The music industry doesn't call it that, but the author world calls it a gunslinger.

After 12 years, my heart began to waver. The master told me that music is a fart, and everyone in China plays music. 1.4 billion people, except for the dumb, everyone will hum a couple of sentences. There are a lot of people who write songs, and there are countless professionals. The record company says too much, and says a lot less, but why do people sign you?

That's an iron truth, people of fire don't necessarily sing. Andy Lau doesn't know how to read music, and so-and-so never sings in person, and there are many substitute singers. Why? Because of this damn music, unless your talent is amazing and you have earth-shattering luck, otherwise, this kind of thing has not happened more than ten years ago.

Singers, it's money thrown out. And musicians are in the relationship......

For 13 years, he gave up music. I finally found out that it was a road that went to the dark. That year I was 18.

In the second half of the year, he entered the online literature industry. I started writing novels, still foolishly believing that my efforts would succeed!

I started writing books in the second half of '13, and it was not until June '14 that I started to sign the first book.

The first book is 40... One million words is complete.

The second book was all 60 and 1 million words were completed......

By a year or five, I was 20...... Start writing two books, or even three books at a time.

The last book, the average order 140.Halfway through the writing, I encountered a large-scale sweep of the website and was unfortunately killed.

Lord Yama, is the ...... I can't count how many there are. I've written too much because of the bits and pieces. It's still on the streets, and the results are terrible.

Now in December, the end of the year, and we are about to enter the 16th year. I don't know what next year will be, but if there is still a voice in my heart telling me that hard work will pay off!

13 to 15 years. I had nothing and lost a lot.

I was 18 years old and my ex-girlfriend for two years. She left. I told myself that it was a temporary departure. There have been many separations and reunions before, and I told myself again that this time it was only a longer time to be apart, well, five months......

I was her first love. At that time, she had always had short hair, and I argued with her more than once because of this, but she just said, I don't like long hair, I want short hair, I want to wear neutral clothes......

I called her today, and she greeted her very politely, like an old friend I hadn't seen for many years, but her tone was cold.

She said, "My hair has grown long now."

I didn't speak, my eyes red.

She said again, this is the last call, and I will block you when I am done, because my new boyfriend will not let me contact my ex-boyfriend again.

I continued to be silent.

She said: Don't contact me again, I figured it out, you said that girls should look like girls, and long hair is actually beautiful. He also encouraged me to grow my long hair, so I kept it. I'm sorry I didn't ...... for you back then.

I forced a laugh: I wish you happiness, I am doing well now. Good bye.

Hanging up the phone, I didn't drink, and poured a few large sips of liquor. My heart was roaring, two years, what I gained, what I lost. I didn't get anything, I was still a loser, and I was still a stupid second thing who lived for my dreams. And I lost love, I lost my youth, I lost the good memories of my peers.

When my peers were messing around in college, playing games, eating and waiting for death, enjoying the 'ruined youth', I got up at eight o'clock every day, wrote two books a day, and coded until the wee hours of the morning.

When peers have academic qualifications, they are waiting to graduate from college and arrange a job at home. I'm working hard for my future, the future from a dream to a reality!

I lost my whole youth in exchange for continuing to hit the streets...... Continue to fail, continue to be steadfast.

I see, the heart is like a rock, which is actually a curse. Their subtext is to say: The stones in the pit are smelly and hard, and they will stay in the pile of and urine!

Imagine that the woman I love is now being coquetted in the arms of another man. Imagine that I was talking about this in this no-man's corner, and she was talking and laughing with her new boyfriend in a western restaurant. Imagine when I am alive alone, I am happy alone, I am sad alone, and I can't even find a friend to talk to. Former classmates, there was a large group of brothers and friends sitting together on campus laughing, unscrupulously talking about which class of beauties was so beautiful......

I lost a lot, I lost my friendship with the computer for a long time. Facing the computer for a long time, I lost love. I lost my youth and the most beautiful years of my life!

A cigarette is inhaled hard, and nicotine is streaked through the trachea and into the lungs. The hot pain, the cool tears came out. I can finally laugh uncontrollably...... It's time to forget.

Forget your youth, forget all the good. I should continue to persevere on this path and go further and further. Forget everything, forget all the negative emotions, I instill chicken soup for the soul in myself, I still think that hard work will always pay off, perseverance is victory.

Even if...... It's a victory for the spiritual world.

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I flipped through this vest, from June this year, to the present, the sum of all the manuscript fee income.

$3,000......

From June to December. I started writing a book and earned 3,000 yuan.

Hehe.

And that's what I got......

Who can understand that the codeword is tired to the point of nosebleeds? The liver is overloaded, and with a sneeze, a nosebleed will be sprayed on a computer monitor. At the age of 20, I have spondylosis, frozen shoulder, and I haven't left one behind... I seem to have lost my health......

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Sigh, the reality is actually like this.

Life goes on, but the dream is coming to an end......

Thank you to the readers who have always supported me, and to the fans of Dabao.

Thank you for being with me along the way.

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Crazy!

Hysteria!

Everything today has finally pushed me to the limit!

Cry a lot, get drunk. Put on headphones and turn up the volume of rock music to the maximum, listen to the intense music, put your head in the quilt, and shout hoarsely:

"I don't admit defeat !!"

"I don't throw in the towel!!!!"

……

It's such stubbornness, and it doesn't change. Accepting the reality, there is still a soil in my heart for the stock of dreams, and I don't know how long it will live......

This is the words of a fool. is an essay of a loser.

Thank you all along the way!

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