Chen Yi turned on all the ceiling lights in the living room, and everything became brighter, which cleared some of the oppressive atmosphere, and also allowed me to see Chen Yi's surprised expression (qingqing). For a brief moment, she seemed to discourage the idea of going out, and she sat down on the sofa in the living room......

I leaned against the door and looked at her, and it took her a long time to calm down and say to me, "I didn't expect that Yuan Zhen was no longer there...... Human life is really too fragile, and our destiny is even more fragile! ”

"Yes, in this golden world, we are all too small, Yuan Zhen is just one step ahead of us, if we can live well after this time node, it is called earned; If we don't have a good time, it's really hard to say whether we are lucky to be alive or Yuan Zhen is more enjoyable......" After a pause, I whispered again: "Actually, the most pitiful person is Xiao Ai, Yuan Zhen died (body) body, but she died thought...... Therefore, many times when I met her face to face, I felt that she had not become just a look, and the rest was a stranger. ”

Chen Yi looked up at me, her expression (Qing qing) was a little complicated, and finally simplified into a shallow smile, and said to me: "So, Yuan Zhen is dead, you feel that you have a sense of responsibility for her, and then you have done these recent things (Qing qing), to the ears of others, (Tingting) has a sense of anger at the crown for a red face!" ”

"You're wrong...... I didn't think about it that much. ”

"You can't hear the good or the bad?"

"I can hear it, but I'm still willing to listen to it as a good thing."

Chen Yi glanced at me again and replied, "Yes, otherwise we won't be able to talk...... After a pause, she said again: "I think you are talking to me about this, just hoping that someone can understand what you have done recently, because you also know that it is not right to do so...... So these are your current troubles. It also makes you so contradictory that you begin to be sensitive, and you begin to doubt what kind of road you are walking underfoot. ”

Looking at Chen Yi's determined appearance, I suddenly wanted to cry, because after going around and around, the person who knew me best turned out to be her...... I was on the verge of a breakdown, living in a heavy mind almost every day, and even dreaming for several nights that I could fly, to a strange world with no people, no disputes, and no color......

I have too many words in my heart that I can't say, so I still look at Chen Yi silently, with mixed feelings in my heart, I am really not a person who can see everything, like most people, I have my concerns, I have my compromises, I have my gloomy sadness......

Chen Yi exhaled softly, then looked up but closed her eyes, her heart (emotion) seemed to be more complicated than mine. Finally, she said to me, "Jiang Qiao, when the whole world is unwilling to understand you, I want to be a woman who understands you...... As I said, I'm not afraid of anything, I'm most afraid that you will live in a life that others have forced you on, helpless......"

My heart felt like it was soaked in warm water, and my nose felt sour. It's like you're struggling for a long time in a river with no light, and finally you see a woman looking for you along the bank with a bright light...... It's just that you once thought she was gone, but she has always left a light for you in her heart.

Yes, I cried, I couldn't hold back my tears...... I'm fed up with living in the eyes of others and can't escape, and I'm tired of this hypocrisy that the more I live, the less I look like myself...... I'm always complaining that Xiao Ai has changed, but I'm not.

At this moment, Chen Yi stood up from the sofa, and then gently hugged me, I experienced a long-lost touch, just like that summer, she was wearing a white dress, sitting next to me, the same shampoo smell, the same soft and amazing.

I didn't dare to hug her, I just leaned on her shoulder and left, wiping my tears from her shoulder. Then he smiled and asked her, "Do you really understand me?" …… Do you think everything I'm doing now is what I should do? ”

Chen Yi nodded sincerely, and she replied: "I understand, because when everyone is powerless, what you need most now is not questioning, but recognition, even if it is very small...... Jiang Qiao, I'll help you check on Yuan Zhen's affairs (qing), I must have more connections in this circle than you, and those things (qing) back then will more or less have a little rumor coming out...... If Xiao Ai really had no choice but to leave back then, he even chose to leave after making a sacrifice...... Then you go and grasp her well, she is the woman who (loves AI) the most in your life. ”

"Didn't you say that Jin Qiu is the most suitable woman for me? Not so long ago. ”

"I said it, but people's minds change...... Before this, I didn't know that Yuan Zhen was no longer there, and I didn't know that you were living in such pain and so confused. ”

I finally lowered my head and said "thank you" to her, and then "thank you" again.

Chen Yi held my shoulder, she asked me to cheer up like a man, and then smiled at me with a forced smile: "Jiang Qiao, no matter what the future holds, you at least have the opportunity to choose who you want to live with, but ...... Some people have no turning back...... The only thing she can do is to use her own painful experience to tell the man who can't ask for it to be brave, to be sincere, and to be true (love AI) ......"

I looked up at her, and for the first time I felt that I owed the woman in front of me too much, too much...... I finally let go of the burden in her heart, which was already someone else's wife, and gently hugged her...... It's like more than twenty years ago, when we hugged for the first time, held hands for the first time, and played for the first time, she became my wife...... But because I became her husband, I was severely reprimanded by her father, saying strongly that I was playing hooligan, but no one except myself knew how pure the (love ai) used to be for her...... Come to think of it, this is the biggest pain between us!

I lost her and never really had her......

Chen Yi has grown up, and she was hugged by me, she was not excited, nor did she cry like rain, she just patted my back gently, pronounced my name in her mouth a few times, and then silently shed tears.

……

With all the windows closed, I left my residence, and Chen Yi had left the neighborhood before me. She said she had a dinner to attend tonight, so she couldn't accompany me to dinner on this seemingly monotonous night.

I sat alone at a food stall on the street, asked for a bowl of (hot) dry noodles, tore open the chopsticks once, and began to eat mechanically. However, behind the numbness, I hope that all the pain is a one-time (sexual xing), just like the chopsticks in this hand, and you can throw it away after eating.

A moment later, my phone rang in my pocket, it was a call from Lao Jin, who first asked me if I had eaten, and then asked me to go to his house to have a few drinks with him.

I couldn't refuse, so after paying the stall owner, I drove my newly bought Maserati to Lao Jin's house. I know in my heart that drinking is human (love), but what I really want to talk about is my engagement with Jin Qiu, and this is what they care about the most.

After about 20 minutes of driving, I arrived at the community where Lao Jin lived, and then parked the car in the parking space that Jin Qiu had bought before. At the same time, Lao Jin also came back from a walk, he took a little golden retriever who was not yet an adult and stood next to my car, looked at it, and asked me, "Have you changed cars?" ”

"Well, I just changed it today, and I haven't had time to rush to play the card yet."

"What kind of car is this?"

I replied, "Maserati, an Italian car, (quite ting) for young people." ”

"Not bad!" Lao Jin sighed and didn't pay too much attention to the car. He also told me that he had gone fishing in the reservoir this afternoon, and that he had caught a lot of fish, and that he had caught my favorite snakehead, which had been made into our appetizer.

To be honest, I once liked this feeling of home, and because of this, I felt that my marriage with Jin Qiu would not be too bad, because Lao Jin and Luo Sumei would really care for us, and we would have a lot less trouble after marriage.

……

After I sat down with Lao Jin, she also untied her apron and sat down, then filled me with a bowl of soup, handed it to me and said, "You smoke a lot, so I cooked you white fungus and red date soup, you taste the taste, it is very clear of your lungs." ”

Without saying thank you, I took it from Russell Mei's hand and tasted it, a taste that only housewives have time to cook.

After padding my stomach like this, I drank a few glasses of liquor with Lao Jin, and then he talked to me about my engagement with Jin Qiu, and he asked me, "Have you thought about what to do with Jin Qiu's engagement?" ”

"Well, what we mean is to keep it simple, just invite some relatives and friends who are close to each other, and the hotel will not be picked, and it will be prepared to be held in the Tulip Hotel...... If you and Auntie still have any conditions that I need to meet, I will definitely do it. ”

Lao Jin smiled thoughtfully, and replied: "We don't advocate extravagance and waste, as long as you two can live well in the future, we don't have any conditions......"

"What about the bride price? Do you want my mom to talk to you about this? ”

Lao Jin shook his head and replied: "We are not selling our daughters, what kind of bride price do we want...... You can buy a ring for Jin Qiu before you get engaged, and we don't want anything else. ”

Lao Jin's reasonableness made my heart really warm. So, I can also understand the contradictions in my heart. I think that as long as I am a normal person, I will want to have such a dependence and home after so many years of wandering, and the obsession in my heart drives me to respect my heart...... That's why we have created a situation where we enjoy one side and contradict each other.

After a moment of silence, I said to Lao Jin, "I'll go to the mall tomorrow to buy it." ”

Luo Sumei interjected, and she replied: "Don't be in such a hurry, according to our customs here, you have to take Jin Qiu to pick it up." ”

I nodded, and I answered the matter. After that, Lao Jin didn't mention it again, and we had a good drink, and then I stayed at his house for the night.

……

This night, I had another dream, in the dream for no reason, Xiao Ai and I were lying on a (chuang) bed as before, but the room we stayed in was something we had never seen before, and the window was full of tulips of various colors...... But this scene didn't last long, so I woke up and sat on the bed for a while, only to realize that this was Lao Jin's home.

My head hurt a little, and then I felt like vomiting, which was really bad for me, because everything was inconvenient, and I was afraid that I would move too much and disturb the sleep of Lao Jin and Luo Sumei. In the end, I forcibly held back the feeling of wanting to vomit, and slept until dawn. After making sure that Lao Jin and his wife went out for morning exercises, they vomited happily in the bathroom, and then sat on the ground for a long time as if they were prostrating...... I also thought about it for a long time...... But there is still no eyebrow.

And at this time, I really began to look forward to seeing Qiu Zi'an tomorrow, and I hope he can bring me some valuable clues. But there is another possibility, even if he is a shareholder, he will not know (qingqing), because this is a deliberately concealed thing, so the other party will also take this into account, so that the fewer people who know, the better.

In a daze, I received a call from Yang Jin, who told me in advance that she would arrive in Nanjing at about 4 p.m. and asked me to pick her up at the airport. Although I didn't say it explicitly, I also knew that it must have come for my engagement with Jin Qiu, because according to custom, both parents must meet before the engagement takes place.

……

At 9 o'clock in the morning, I went to the company on time, and the employees in the company were very attentive, and they held a special welcome ceremony for my new car. I am also very generous, each of them used WeChat three times, and sent a red envelope of 600 yuan, which is regarded as sharing the victory results of the first stage of the company, and I hope that in the next time, everyone will make the company bigger and stronger.

When it was almost ten o'clock, Qiao Ye rarely came to visit my company, saying that it was a visit, but it was more like he was here to play, because he was not for business, but just sent me a red envelope. He was afraid that he would not be able to come on the day of my engagement with Jin Qiu, so he must deliver the money in advance.

His behavior made me feel that a marriage was close to me, but I couldn't be happy, and even selfishly hoped in my heart that Jin Qiu would delay his return to Nanjing because of some urgent matters, which also gave me some breathing space.

Just when I lost my mind, Qiao Ye knocked on the table and said to me with dissatisfaction: "It's rare for a buddy to come to your company once, don't you want to mess with me, just forget it, and hang me here like this, do you really think I'm thick-skinned and not afraid of embarrassment?" ”

I looked at Qiao Ye, took out a pack of cigarettes from the drawer of the table and threw it to him, and then fell into a state of distraction. Qiao Ye despaired of me, but instead of leaving, he took out a cigarette from the pack of cigarettes I gave him and lit it, and then his face showed a face that was even more confused than me...... Presumably, in addition to giving red envelopes, he also has something on his mind to talk to me.