When my brain was confused, Su Han on the other side didn't bother me, and after a long silence, I finally said to her: "Chen Yi and I have lived together since we were children, and the distance between us is just two walls in that alley. Before the age of marriage, as long as we are together, we are all happy, I can take her around crazy, and she will give me her snacks; When I was older, she would buy two movie tickets, invite me to the movies, I would ride her on my bicycle, we would eat a bucket of popcorn and drink a bottle of drink, I thought, there should be no better memory in my life than this, but, since we fell in love, everything has changed, her father found me and told me how realistic this society is; Her suitors also came to tell me how incompetent I am, Chen Yi carefully maintained it everywhere for the sake of my self-esteem, and I could feel how tired she was like this."

I sighed when I said this, Su Han knew that I hadn't finished my words yet, and was just using this interval to calm down the feelings, so she didn't interject, and still waited patiently for me to continue.

I stared at the osmanthus tree growing next to the ancient well in the courtyard for a long time, and finally said: "Looking back, the days after we fell in love, although it was not long, it was full of all kinds of grievances, pain, panic and careful struggle, even if there is a little happiness and warmth are like Su Han from God, can you tell me, is love really like this, two people must fight for it so hard, so like walking on thin ice to care, in the end, it is still a mountain of swords and a sea of fire in front of them, and then just like this reminds the fearful to live"

Su Han looked at me with empathy, and replied for a long time: "I haven't experienced what you said, but why don't you grit your teeth and wait for a bright future?"

"Maybe Chen Yi and I are not the kind of people who live with special confidence, so we can't afford it and can't let it go, but time will always give us the answer, no matter what the final result is, I recognize Su Han, do you know that I have a grandmother who is regarded by the society as a lonely old man living in a nursing home; I also have a biological father who was exiled to Shenzhen, and his whereabouts are unknown; My mother was said to be a good woman, but she ignored me for so many years, and I didn't want to believe in her goodness anymore; There are too many things I have to do, if the love that should be happy still brings me so much pain, I am afraid that I will collapse, I will collapse, I have been really tired of living all these years, I am just a small person who is difficult to become a climate, and the success you are talking about, only at the moment of success is called success, there are not many people in this world who are as lucky as you. ”

Su Han sighed: "The qiē that you and Chen Yi are facing now is probably worse than the situation we were in back then."

My thoughts were a little sluggish, I didn't speak anymore, I didn't drink tea, I still stared at the osmanthus tree next to the ancient well for a while, and after a long time, I finally changed the topic and asked Su Han: "Do you and Qiao Ye have specific plans?"

Su Han shook his head: "I'm also very confused now, I persuaded Qiao Ye to go back to Nanjing to explain things clearly, but he didn't want to." He said that as soon as he returned to Nanjing, it was complicated, and his marriage with Qin Miao was different from that of ordinary families, and divorce was impractical. ”

"Qiao Ye is right, but are you willing to follow him so namelessly?"

Su Han looked at me and didn't answer for a long time. At this moment, her eyes are so similar to Chen Yi before, I see the contradictions and complexities in her heart, and many times, we are unwilling to make a choice, but the shape is not forgiving at all.

I also thought about it, if Qiu Zi'an hadn't proposed to Chen Yi, Chen Yi and I would have been so peaceful, wouldn't it be good to live a peaceful life for a while, but there are so many people in this world who can't wait and vow not to give up until they reach their goal

The next day, I woke up to the alarm on my mobile phone, and it was already half past ten after washing, and Chen Yi had already packed all my things, and then came to my room again to sort out my luggage for me. In two hours, we will also take the flight back to Nanjing, I feel a little reluctant, I know that there will be few opportunities to come to Lijiang in the future, and even if I come, there is no Chen Yi to accompany me.

After Chen Yi folded my last piece of clothing and put it in the box, he asked me, "Did I leave anything behind, I will clean it up for you." ”

"There's a razor in the bathroom."

Chen Yi went to the bathroom to find the razor again, wrapped it in a convenient bag very carefully, put it in my suitcase, and sat on the bed waiting for me who was polishing my shoes, but to my surprise, she didn't tell me about Qiao Ye and Qin Miao, she looked very calm, calm as if she had just ended an ordinary trip.

At eleven o'clock, we got on the special bus to the airport, arrived at the airport at 11:30, got the boarding pass, checked in the luggage, and there was still nearly an hour before the boarding time, and we sat next to each other in the waiting area of the airport to rest

I was a little bored, so I put my keychain on my finger and turned it, and dropped it several times halfway, but Chen Yi picked it up for me, and then took out the pastries from my handbag for me to eat, and in the eyes of others, we are a couple, the man loves to play, the woman is gentle and careful, and even I myself have such an illusion. So much so, for a moment, I hugged her, and then used my fingers to stroke the ends of her hair to pass the time of waiting, and Chen Yi herself did not averse to such intimate contact, she kept leaning on my shoulder and playing with her mobile phone.

When I woke up, I suddenly felt sad, if we can get rid of those troubles in Nanjing, how good it would be to stay in Lijiang, and in time we will be able to find the ease and happiness we once had

I was a little sad, I let go of Chen Yi, who was being held by myself, and then closed my eyes and leaned back in the chair, forcing myself not to think about anything anymore.

After a while, Chen Yi patted my arm, and when I opened my eyes, she took off her mask and said to me: "Jiangqiao, if you want to buy a car, remember to call me, I have friends in many 4S stores in Nanjing, it should be a lot cheaper." ”

"Well, I'll call you when I think of what car to buy."

Chen Yi nodded, and after a little silence, he said to me: "I will transfer that money to your card after I go back." ”

"According to what we said, 200,000 is enough."

"Well, I know"

Chen Yi smiled at me after finishing speaking, and then watched the people in front of him come and go and fell into a state of distraction. After a long time, she grabbed my arm, leaned back on my shoulder, and closed her eyes a little tiredly.

I took off my coat and draped it over her, and the waiting time for boarding became less and less as we moved

Because the plane stopped in Kunming, when we arrived in Nanjing, it was already half past five, I was standing at the exit of the terminal with Chen Yi's luggage, we were facing the familiar lights of the city, and the passengers around us who had been talking Nanjing dialect in stop-and-go, and it was time for us to say goodbye.

I handed the luggage to Chen Yi and asked, "Where are you going back?"

"Go to the house on Danfeng Street, my mother has already cooked dinner."

"Well, that's not a good way, let's take a taxi."

"You go first, I'll watch you go"

I felt a pain in my heart for no reason, and then shouted at her: "Why are you making it like life and death, Nanjing is so big, won't we meet in the future?"

As I spoke, I dragged Chen Yi towards the taxi waiting place, Chen Yi didn't know where the strength came from, she grabbed a lamppost and refused to move forward.

I let go of her, she looked at me and sobbed, two lines of tears stained her gray mask, my heart was dripping blood, and I threw my luggage on the ground, I wanted to yell at her like before, I hated her disobedience but, I was choked inexplicably, my nose was sore, and my tears couldn't stop coming down

I turned my body, raised my head to prevent myself from crying at this time, I picked up the luggage on the ground, and walked quickly to the taxi parked not far away, I left her behind, and did not look back, and when I walked outside the eaves, I found that the weather in Nanjing was so cold, and the sky was still drizzling

I had never been so decisive as I had been at this point, I told the driver who opened the window "Tulip Road", threw all my luggage into the trunk of the car, and I sat in the passenger seat of the taxi without saying a word

After the driver pressed the meter, the car started slowly, I finally looked in the rearview mirror, her figure stood in the cold wind more and more blurred, but the lights on the highway bridge became more and more clear, I really heard the sound of the cold wind blowing, and I also heard my heart being torn a little bit in the fragile body

I hated saying goodbye because it was too hard for me to bear