After ending the call with Xiao Ai, I took a taxi to Xinjiekou, and on the way, Xiao Ai also used WeChat positioning to send me the specific location of her and Yuan Zhen.

There was a bit of traffic jam on the road, and it took me about half an hour to reach my destination, and I saw Yuan Zhen who was dizzy and leaning on the lamppost, Xiao Ai was supporting him beside him, but his steps were also a little floating, his cheeks were flushed, and he obviously drank a lot of wine.

I came to them and stretched out my hand to support Yuan Zhen for Xiao Ai, he had obviously drunk to the point of fragmentation, I didn't want to make this already delicate atmosphere embarrassing, so I smiled and said to Xiao Ai: "It seems that Yuan Zhen is not as drunk as you, so you can still look at me with two big eyes."

"The white wine he drinks, the red wine I drink, I drink a glass of him, do you understand?"

I looked at Yuan Zhen and praised from the bottom of my heart: "Dude, a lot" and then reproached Xiao Ai and said: "You don't persuade him to be in moderation, drinking too much wine will hurt his body"

Xiao Ai was silent for a while, looking at the crowd of people who were coming and going around him a little sloppily, and then replied: "He said, if you hurt your body, you hurt your body, it's better than being sad, I think so too, so many years of friendship, but there is no chance to say goodbye in the future." ”

I looked at her, and in my image she never seemed to say goodbye to me, and I was always curious about it, and for a moment thought that she hated this way as a parting message.

I didn't choose to solve this puzzle when Xiao Ai was drunk. The next moment, I picked up Yuan Zhen, who was already incapacitated, mixed in the crowd, and walked slowly towards the hotel that had just been booked, while Xiao Ai walked behind me, holding my clothes all the time, for fear of being dispersed by the dense crowd.

The hotel is nearby, and after getting the room card, we took the elevator to the pre-booked room. I was a little tired, so I sat on the sofa and lit a cigarette to rest, while Xiao Ai took some hot water and carefully wiped Yuan Zhen's face

But Yuan Zhen's expression became more and more painful, he grabbed Xiao Ai's hand like a drowning man, and said intermittently in a daze: "Senior sister, you have to go, my heart is as uncomfortable as drinking poison for me, just like garbage, but I still have to live on these garbage, I know, in your heart, I am also the same as the garbage in this world, but you don't want to lose it, I live very lonely with me, and I don't understand the firewood, rice, oil and salt in this world, but I love you and you are gone, My life is rubbish."

This sudden drinking talk made my eyes subconsciously look at Yuan Zhen, and I saw his pain and longing, like a vast snowfall, vast and desolate

Xiao Ai's eyes were filled with tears, and her voice was very soft, but in the quiet room, it was so clear: "But, I don't love your brother, go and see the world, try to love it, even if it's cold and the road is far away, but it still has a beautiful side, and this beauty is not something that I can replace alone, it's just that you haven't discovered it yet."

I took a deep puff of my cigarette and left the room in silence, for the time belonged to them, and the smoke that accompanied the dandelion was about to leave.

In a few days, I will say goodbye to Xiao Ai, a wandering dandelion, like a gust of exhausted wind, my ability is only enough to send her here, I am destined to be like Yuan Zhen, and sacrifice in her life.

I secretly told myself that on the day of parting, I would definitely not be as painful as Yuan Zhen is now

When a cigarette was about to be lit in her hand, Xiao Ai walked out of the hotel room, she gently closed the door, we seemed to have a tacit understanding, neither of us spoke, just looked at each other

It wasn't until the waiter pushing the dining cart walked past us that I whispered to her, "Is it okay for Yuan Zhen to stay in the hotel alone?"

"His brother from the old band will come over later."

"That's good" paused, and I asked again, "Where are you going, I'll send you." ”

Xiao Ai took out 4 coins from his pocket. I already understand, this night. We still have the agreed business to do, we have to go to Tulip Road to buy corn to eat, and the four dollars she bargained with the vendor to get it, pinning all our hopes for the night.

It's still the familiar convenience store, the lights are warm, the world outside the bench is full of fireworks, Xiao Ai and I sat side by side on the bench, holding the corn in the temperature in our hands, but Xiao Ai only bought one this night, we ate half of each, and as for the remaining two yuan, we can buy it again tomorrow.

It seems that everything that should be said has been said, and we just sit like this, and at this point in time, if it was placed in the past, Tulip Road was already sparsely populated, but because it was the New Year, there were still many nearby residents with their families to buy New Year's goods on the street, and the laughter and laughter infected me unconsciously, and I habitually squinted

Finally, Xiao Ai picked at the hole in my clothes that was burned by cigarette butts with his hand and asked, "Are you burned by cigarettes?"

"Hmm."

"So you're more frizzy than me"

I smiled, subconsciously took out a cigarette, and was about to light one, but Xiao Ai, who had never disliked my smoking, stopped me this time, and she signaled that she didn't want to smell the smoke now.

Then I realized that she didn't like the way I sampling, but just to make herself like what I liked, I put the cigarette back in my pocket, and fell into silence, but I didn't get bored because the time I spent with Xiao Ai could already be counted down in hours.

"Jiang Qiao, have you ever loved a woman seriously?"

This was the question that Xiao Ai next to me asked me when the fireworks in the distance burst for the third time. I was stunned for a moment, and finally turned to look at her, who seemed absentmindedly peeling the uneaten corn kernels with her hands. Yes, I think she's absent-minded, but I don't think it's nervous, because she's not a nervous woman in my eyes

I don't think she is a woman who likes to listen to lies, so after a period of silence, she replied: "Chen Yi is the woman I love seriously, my life before I became an adult is her shadow, I took the train back and forth for a day and a night in order to see her who went to school in Beijing, and finally just stood outside the classroom and looked at her a few times, because I only have one day off." ”

Xiao Ai's hand stopped peeling corn kernels, and I stopped talking, but I thought of Chen Yi again, a woman I will never forget in my life

"Why don't you say it, I want to hear how much you love her."

"There's nothing more to say, she and I are not people in the same world after all, we have long been on the same road, going farther and farther in both directions" I put my fingers on my legs, looking at the fireworks in the distance a little helplessly, a gust of wind made me feel suffocated, I didn't want to think of the past at this time, so I lowered my head and smiled bitterly, and then played with the cigarette in my hand over and over

After a long time, Xiao Ai finally replied: "I know that Chen Yi is the woman you love the most in your life, and the woman who appears after that, no matter how good and how much she loves you, is just a pathetic substitute for you."

I have no words because this topic always makes me depressed and makes me unable to find a direction for the future

Xiao Ai sat beside me for a while, then took the corn bone from my hand, threw it in the garbage bin along with hers, and then turned and walked to the side of the road, she was leaving, but I knew she would come again tomorrow, so I didn't leave her, although I don't think there was something to say to her.

I miscalculated Xiao Ai, and she didn't come to me again two days before Chinese New Year's Eve. In the past two days, I called her, she just said that she was not in Nanjing, so she hung up the phone, and I sent a message to ask if she would come back for the New Year, but she did not reply.

I felt that the night two days ago was probably the last time I saw her, but she promised me that she would return the 10,000 yuan she owed me before going to Taiwan, and she would not be untrustworthy.

Thinking about it, I finally gained some confidence.

Grandma was picked up by me last night. At this moment, she was sitting in the courtyard washing the dishes to be eaten at night, and I was outside the courtyard pasting couplets with freshly cooked paste, but from time to time I would look at the mouth of the alley, and I looked forward to seeing the familiar figure wearing red clothes, just like the atmosphere of the New Year, which brought me a good mood

"Bridge, is this child Zhao Mu back for Chinese New Year's Eve?"

"He won't come back this year, and the group sent him to inspect projects abroad."

Grandma sighed and replied while picking off the yellowed leaves: "Zhao Mu, this child is promising, his parents will be happy if they know it" Speaking of this, she seemed to be talking to herself and said: "Hehe, my grandson is not bad, otherwise how could there be so many little girls who like to go to the nursing home to see grandma, grandma actually understands, they are not concerned about grandma, it is you." ”

The older generation will always blindly look down on their children and grandchildren, I smiled helplessly, and replied: "Grandma, you wash the vegetables well, in fact, there are not many people who go to you, we are better friends at best, not as close as you think"

"Don't say it, this girl Jin Qiu went to the nursing home to see me a few days ago, but Chen Yi's girl hasn't been there for a few days."

I interrupted and said, "Grandma, the day is so long, don't worry about who went to see you and who didn't."

"But I have to keep it in my heart, thinking about my grandmother's life, it's just a little bit of a thought."

I felt sad in my heart, although I didn't let my grandmother say it just now, but I knew that the next thing she wanted to talk about was Xiao Ai, but she couldn't figure it out if she didn't come here for the New Year, because I thought of another possibility, the 10,000 yuan she could let someone else transfer it to me, or transfer it to my bank account, and she didn't have to pay it back in person.

That's how I got caught up in the midst of gains and losses

When the couplet was halfway pasted, there was a familiar sound of footsteps at the corner of the alley, I was extremely sensitive to the sound, and immediately recognized that it was Xiao Ai's footsteps, and she was wearing high heels, otherwise I would not have heard it so far, my heart inexplicably produced a trace of joy, she finally came, did not release my pigeons.

As I imagined, she was wearing a long red down jacket with a pair of red high heels on her feet, and she was pushing a bicycle with a lot of vintage goods. I'm sure that the New Year's atmosphere in the whole alley is not as strong as that of her alone, especially the knitted hat she wears on her head, which shows several cartoon children playing with firecrackers

I didn't try to greet her, but I never took my eyes off her.

"Jiangqiao, grandma, I bought her New Year's goods"

"I'm here, I'm here." Grandma, who heard the movement, responded while picking up the crutches beside her and walked out of the small courtyard, the smile on her wrinkled face was extraordinarily hard, but it was from the heart.

Grandma held Xiao Ai's hand, and after asking why her hands were so cold, she put Xiao Ai's hand into her cotton clothes, and then gently stroked Xiao Ai's somewhat messy hair, as if looking at her granddaughter, maybe closer than her granddaughter

At this time, there was another familiar sound of footsteps in the alley, and my heartbeat suddenly accelerated, but I didn't believe that Chen Yi would return here at this time, back to this alley.

I unconsciously clenched my hand, and looked closely at the corner, Xiao Ai also followed my gaze

Based on the experience gained for more than ten years, there is nothing wrong with it, Chen Yi, who has not been seen for a long time, walked over from that corner wearing a red cotton coat, and she also held some couplets in her hands. Then I remembered that their old house should also be replaced with a new couplet today. So, we seemed to face each other in a thrilling situation

I just looked at her, and despite her light makeup, I could faintly see a non-obvious wound on her neck, which was the best proof that she went to the so-called most brutal survival show, and that she was indeed living a life that I could not have imagined during this time.

Chen Yi finally walked in front of us lightly, she didn't look at me or Xiao Ai, she just smiled and said to grandma: "Grandma, I don't see you for a long time, I wish you a happy new year and good health." ”

Xiao Ai's hand was still in her own clothes by her grandmother, and her grandmother didn't intend to let go because of Chen Yi's arrival, but Xiao Ai herself withdrew her hand from the cotton clothes, and then looked at Chen Yi

At this time, grandma took out a red envelope from her pocket and handed it to Chen Yi, she said: "Don't think grandma's red envelope is small, grandma also wishes you all the best next year." ”

Chen Yi said thank you, and then took the red envelope, she finally looked at me My heartbeat kept increasing because of her gaze, even if she was expressionless, I seemed to be able to see her joy, anger and sorrow