After my grandmother's request to marry Xiao Ai, my brain was in a state of flux, and I never felt that it was something I needed to face right now.

My wooden state made my grandmother's heart very bottomless, so that when she looked at me, her eyes became more and more eager, and finally she couldn't hold it back, and said to me: "You have a word for grandma...... Can you marry Xiao Ai's girl? ”

I held back for a long time, and finally replied: "Grandma, can you look at the issue of marriage with the eyes of the times?" Even the 20th century has passed for more than ten years, and now is really not the era of my parents, who could get married with a bicycle, a sewing machine, and a flashlight...... At the very least, I have to have a decent house first, not for luxury decoration, but also for a medium decoration...... Also, there should be a car, and the wedding must be held in a reasonable hotel...... These standards, what do you want me to meet now, and you don't know, she is the daughter of Mr. Xiao, even if Mr. Xiao has fallen now, but she was once the daughter of the most well-known local real estate developer in Nanjing! ”

My venting words left my grandmother in silence, and I saw a wave of powerless self-reproach in her silence. I deeply believe that if she had enough money for me to get married, whether I accepted it or not, she would give it to me at this moment, but my grandmother was just an old lady with a disabled leg and foot, relying on doing some manual work in a nursing home to reduce the burden on me, how could she have such a huge savings? So her expression looked even more sad, and my heart was not a good one.

I put down the bowl that I had been holding in my hand, lit a cigarette for myself, and regretted it in my heart, I shouldn't have opened the bloody reality in this way to show my grandmother, I should have found another excuse, just say that Xiao Ai has no plans to get married at this stage, so grandma will be much better, because since Yang Jin and Jiang Jiyou left one after another, poverty has become a lingering pain in the hearts of our grandparents and grandchildren.

When I was about to finish a cigarette, my grandmother looked at me with a complicated look, and after a long time, she whispered to me: "Xiaoqiao, you are an adult, and grandma should tell you about the past of your parents...... Perhaps, it will give you a little inspiration. ”

In just an instant, the blood in my whole body surged up rapidly, and then my heart beat faster, but the wind blew so lightly this night, as if telling me that this was just a night no different from before, the stars and the moon were there, and there were also a few thick clouds blown to the most marginal part of the sky, and a qiē was very common.

I held my breath and waited for my grandmother to continue, I believe that this will be a relationship that is rare in the world, because I have faintly received some information about Yang Jin from Lao Jin, but Lao Jin's knowledge must be very limited, and grandma is the one who knows the most insider.

It seemed more complicated than my feelings, and it was a long time before my grandmother whispered to me, "Your father and your mother met in '88. In the winter of that year, your father and your Uncle Jin were discharged from the army together, and your father could drive when he was in the army, so after being discharged from the army, he was assigned to work as a delivery driver in a textile factory...... That night, your father drove a truck to deliver goods as usual, and when he drove to Yuhua South Road, he found a girl lying on the side of the road, this girl was your mother Yang Jin...... Your dad is honest and kind by nature, and he is not afraid of getting into trouble, so he drove your mom to a nearby hospital without saying a word, and paid for her medical expenses, and then got in touch with the teacher at her school according to your mom's student ID, but was mistaken for the driver who caused the accident...... At that time, the technology was not as developed as it is now, there was no monitoring equipment on the road at all, and your father couldn't explain it clearly, so he was taken to the police station for investigation, which was really wronged! ……”

Because this incident involved my parents, my brain unconsciously simulated the picture at that time, in that picture, Jiang Jiyou was depressed because he was wronged, and Yang Jin was lying on the hospital bed fighting with death.

I lit another cigarette, took a heavy puff, and when I was at ease, I asked, "And then?" ”

"Later, fortunately, your mother finally woke up, and she proved to the police at the police station that your father was not the driver who caused the accident, and regarded your father as her life-saving benefactor...... Later, she went back to Beijing, but she kept writing with your father. ”

I asked uncertainly, "Back to Beijing?" ”

Grandma nodded and replied, "Well, your mother went to Renmin University in Beijing, and she came to Nanjing for fun, so she didn't expect such a thing, but according to me, this is the fate of her and your father...... So, she came to Nanjing after graduation, and after about half a year, she married your father, and she will have you the next year. ”

At this point, Grandma paused, her expression was sad, she sighed deeply, and then she was silent for a long time, and I had pieced together the limited information I had received from Lao Jin and what I had heard at this time, and I already knew a rough ...... As a veteran, Jiang Jiyou is not worthy of Yang Jin, whether in terms of knowledge or family background, he is far from being worthy.

Grandma said: "Later, your grandfather and your grandmother came to Nanjing once, but grandma and I, as parents, were not able to meet with them, but I heard your father say that your grandfather was the first batch of cadres after Shenzhen was designated as a special economic zone, and your father did not know what kind of cadres he was...... At that time, your mother was already pregnant with you, and it was impossible to follow them anymore, but your mother was in such a family, with a strict family education, and her behavior was bad for the norm, which your grandfather would never tolerate, so he broke off the father-daughter relationship with your mother, and never appeared again in the next few years. ”

I questioned: "If this is really the case, then why did Jiang Jiyou divorce Yang Jin, there are no difficulties and obstacles in front of them, as long as they live a good life!" ”

Grandma signaled me not to be anxious, but the silence that followed brought tears to her eyes, and she said to me after a long time, "What is happening below is what Grandma wants to remind you...... Grandma wants you to stop following your dad's old path. ”

I nodded and replied, "Grandma, you speak slowly, I'll listen quietly." ”

Grandma wiped her tears with a handkerchief, and said to me: "Your mother was assigned to work in the government in the first year she came to Nanjing...... Your mother cared very much about his feelings, and when she was pregnant with you, she quit her job in the government and gave birth to you, so she simply went to work in the textile factory across the street from us...... However, your mother is really a piece of gold, she is decent, she has university knowledge, and she has nothing to say, so there are many people who think about her, even if your mother hides away from these people, but she can't stand some people who tell right and wrong, gossiping behind people...... When this gossip reaches your father's ears, it will kill him! …… After a long time, his whole person has changed, he has become unmotivated, he has become a good drinker and a good gambler, and he even killed someone because of a drunk driving when you were seven years old......"

Grandma couldn't cry when she said this, and I still have a rare impression that during that time, there were always a lot of people blocking my door to make a fuss, but it didn't take long for this matter to subside, but I was too young at the time, so I didn't know how it calmed down, and it still needed grandma to explain to me.

I gently patted my grandmother on the back to calm her down, and the night went down like this, and every qiē darkness seemed to render this sad past, although in this past, there were white dandelions, and I stood under her apron looking at the cooking smoke, waiting for dinner, but still could not hide the gloom of the overall environment!

My grandmother finally said to me, "Later, your mother found a relationship, borrowed money, and finally gave an explanation to the victim's family...... However, after listening to the rumors, your father decided that your mother was looking for an improper relationship between men and women, so he intensified his gambling, and even had other women outside, and beat your mother...... It wasn't until you chilled your mother and killed your heart that you finally broke off with him with divorce...... I didn't stop it, because your dad is already sick, and divorce is the only way to survive for your mom...... However, grandma was reluctant to let her take you away, grandma was worried that she would remarry, her mind was not on you, and her stepfather would not give you a good life, so grandma knelt down and begged her, and she had to fight a lawsuit...... She finally agreed not to take you away, but grandma didn't expect that not long after she left, your father would follow...... In the end, our grandparents and grandchildren were left in Nanjing! ”

I was very depressed in my heart, it turned out that Yang Jin was going to take me away, but my grandmother insisted on keeping me, but she didn't expect that Jiang Jiyou would also leave, and there was no news for so many years.

For the first time, I was afraid of the turning gears in fate, because it gave people too much pain that they couldn't bear, and life is not a fairy tale, although the acquaintance between Jiang Jiyou and Yang Jin is as beautiful as a fairy tale, but the ending is still cut by the knife of reality, drenched in blood, unrecognizable!

My heart was full of unwillingness, and my voice was much louder: "If she really had the intention of taking me away, why didn't she come back to see me for so many years, not once?" ”

Grandma shook her head, signaling that she didn't know, but whispered back with guilt: "The day your mother left, I had a long talk with grandma. She said that she may never return to Nanjing in her life, but on the day Xiaoqiao got married, she would definitely come back to have a look...... After so many years, I don't know if she still remembers this sentence! ”

I swallowed in pain, closed my eyes, and tears fell...... At this moment, I can't find myself in the grievances and hatreds of the previous generation, but I am instinctively sad, and I instinctively remember the picture of singing the song "Mom" with Xiao Ai in Lijiang last year. I don't know if I've been as well-behaved as I sing in the song over the years, but I know that I can't hold my head up in a heavy life!

"Xiaoqiao, you and Chen Yi have been childhood sweethearts since childhood, but why didn't grandma match you together? …… Because grandma is afraid that you will follow your father's old path...... If Xiao Ai, the girl, hadn't experienced such family changes, grandma would still have concerns in her heart, but after this period of getting along, I know that this girl is very dependent on you, and you do many things very well, unlike your father, so grandma thinks that you can live together, but you have to work hard yourself, support each other with her, and improve each other, so that you are not your father and your mother's old path! ”