Klut Atoll, 24 September. Yamamoto Isoroku's combined fleet was stationed here. On this very day, an army officer of low rank but with great influence came here to ask for a meeting with Isoroku Yamamoto, commander of the Combined Fleet. This forty-year-old officer with a pair of garden glasses is the most famous troublemaker in the General Staff Headquarters, Masanobu Tsuji. Speaking of this buddy, it's definitely a gem. Later, someone on the Internet discussed one of the saddest combinations during World War II. The Tao is: the general of perfume (France, the most famous is perfume) plus the staff of Ni (Japanese transliteration) plus the soldiers of macaroni (this does not need to be explained, Italy) plus the counter-espionage of the principal (chairman).

Needless to say, the general of Perfume is that the world's first army is handed over to them for command, and it will be finished in a few weeks, which is exactly "not afraid of god-like enemies, afraid of pig-like teammates; If you are not afraid of a teammate like a pig, you are afraid of a captain like a pig. Therefore, it is well deserved to rank first in the saddest group.

Macaroni soldiers have always loved peace, it is said that in North Africa, once, a small number of British tanks charged the Italian anti-tank gun position, at the beginning, the Italians fired back, just two minutes of shooting, the Italians suddenly stopped resisting, raised the white flag, when the British asked the reason, the Italians rightly said: "Because of our?? Ammunition?? The box was not opened with a crowbar, so we were forced to surrender. ”

The principal's counter-espionage, see all kinds of spy war movies that have been super popular recently, and the school (one) (book) [read] The novel ybdu has never taken advantage of it. When he was doing it with the Japanese, even under the nose of the counterintelligence agency, the vice president was successfully rebelled by others, and he also successfully absconded. It's no wonder that the principal's spy agencies all have the word "unified", and they are indeed very similar to some kind of "bucket".

As for Ni's staff officers, it was not a fuel-efficient lamp. The junior staff officers of the Japanese Army are a group of particularly crazy people who dare to do anything in order to wear the general's epaulettes as soon as possible. In them, there is no such thing as "defying the condemnation of the world". What they are best at is not assisting generals in formulating detailed battle plans, but deciding on the tasks of their superiors according to their own preferences. The boss of this gang of buddies is called Ishihara Waner, and he is a damn dead eunuch (this guy likes to hang an ancestral extra-long katana and load 13 everywhere, and once went out to ride a horse, and when he got off the horse, in order to load 13, he jumped off the horse directly. As a result, tragedy struck: the extra-long katana was on the ground at one end, and the other end, the hilt, was on Ishihara's little jj. As a result, it really hurts - the eggs are broken. Later, this one was cut off.) That guy has been a factor in stability and unity since he was a child. It is said that when this guy was in the third grade of middle school, he sketched in an art class, and this guy handed in a very realistic work: a very cute little jj, and there was a line of words on the side: "My baby, painted in the toilet, October 1st". (Just make fun of your little jj and get retribution!) The best thing this guy did was that he started the 9/18 incident. At that time, these buddies didn't discuss it with the commander of the Guan (that) Eastern Army at all, and decided to do it themselves. (Actually, the commander of the Eastern Army also knew, but for some reason he pretended not to know) but these buddies - Ishihara Waner Nakasa, Ita (that) Seishiro Ogaki, Hanaya Masasa and Imada Shintaro Shosa - didn't pay much attention to secrecy, and this matter was known to the General Staff Headquarters. So the General Staff Headquarters sent a deputy chief of the combat department, Miji Jianchuan, to Mukden to stop the Guan (that) Eastern Army from coming in chaos, but as soon as he arrived at the Guan (that) Eastern Army, he was pulled by Hanaya Shoshao to drink, and then he was put down, and then when the wine woke up, 918 was already finished. Xiao Liuzi's Northeast Army has been completely disarmed, and the Ishihara are busy counting the loot, no, it should be said that it is captured, it cannot be called trophies, there has been no battle at all.

Immediately after the incident, Ishihara was promoted to the rank of Osa, and was promoted to the head of the War Guidance Section of the General Staff Headquarters, and then concurrently served as the chief of the Operations Section of the First Department (Operations Department), the core section of the General Staff Headquarters. In 1937, he was promoted to the head of the First Department of the General Staff Headquarters. Because of the success of the "Manchurian Incident", Ishihara Wanji and Itagaki Seishiro became heroes of all Japan.

With this precedent of taking shortcuts for promotion, the atmosphere in the back is bad. In order to be promoted, the big guys rushed up, and all kinds of "incidents" came out like dog pee moss after the rain. Among these people is the staff officer Masanobu Tsuji, who is now in Krut.

In 1937, he served as a staff officer of the North China Front, and when he was appointed as a staff officer of the Eastern Army in 1939, he simply drafted and issued a "Outline for the Handling of the Manchurian and Soviet Border" in the name of General Ueda Kenkichi, commander of the Eastern Army, and openly encouraged the front-line troops to provoke the Soviet army, which led to the "Nomenkan Incident". The Japanese army was beaten by Zhukov's mechanized troops at Nomenkan, and the soldiers were defeated. As a result, the commander of the Eastern Army, Kenkichi Ueda, was removed from his post due to the unprecedented defeat of the Japanese army, and as for the staff officer Masanobu Tsuji, well, it was not easy to mix with the Eastern Army in the Guan, so he changed places and became officials in other places and went to Taiwan to continue to be a scourge.

In July 42, the General Staff Headquarters was not careful, and released this guy again, and went to the 17th Army Headquarters to investigate. This time the sea is wide from the fish to the leap, and the sky is high and the birds are flying. On July 15, after arriving in Davao, Philippines, where the headquarters of the 17th Army was located, Masanobu Tsuji immediately instructed the 17th Army: "It is a 'great order' to use both land and sea and immediately attack Port Moresby." This buddy has advanced again, this time even the name of the emperor has been stolen.

Of course, the 17th Army felt strange, when did the emperor directly command the imperial army? But this is an order from His Majesty the Emperor conveyed by the head of the operations squad of the General Staff Headquarters, who would dare to oppose it? Aren't you afraid of "heavenly thieves"? So on July 18, Hyakutake Haruyoshi issued the order for military operations, and on July 21, the investigation detachment crossed Mount Owen Stanley and began combat operations. Even the headquarters of the 17th Army was simply moved from Davao to Rabaul.

Who knew that on July 25, Hattori Takushiro, the head of the base camp operations section, came angrily to ask the 17th Army if the results of the investigation had come out, and then everyone knew that this was Masanobu Tsuji talking nonsense again, and he was stupid from the central to the local.

Shingo Takayama, the leader of the combat force squad of the combat division, asked Hattori: "What should I do, do you want to engage in military justice?" ”

But you have to admit that sometimes the evil is the character. Hattori thought for a long time before saying: "This is related to the face of the base camp, and spreading it will make people doubt the command system of the base camp, and besides, the battle has already begun, and it is useless to punish Tsuji-kun, so let's work hard and strive for the success of the battle." Summoning Tsuji-kun back first." That means "the past is not to blame".

Later, the army suffered losses on Kuah Island. Originally, if you suffer a loss, you will suffer a loss, but if you admit it, you will get it. As the saying goes: often floating in the rivers and lakes, how can you not be stabbed. He also said, "Those who come out to mix will have to pay it back sooner or later." But the Imperial Japanese Army has never suffered any losses. As soon as he suffered a loss, his first reaction was not to quickly throw out the garbage stock of Kuah Island to clear his position and stop the loss, but to continue to eat in line with the belief of "where he fell, he would get up from there", and continued to increase troops to Guah Island one after another. As a result, it was tragic that he was trapped again.

Obviously, without heavy weapons, no matter how many people go up, they will not be able to hit the airport. However, if the airport is not solved, not to mention that heavy weapons will definitely not be delivered, and even ammunition and food will not be delivered. The more people who go up, the more and faster they starve. So a logical circle comparable to chickens laying eggs and egg-laying chickens appeared. The army is dizzy in this circle, and no matter how it goes, it can't get around. Thinking about it, there was only one way to deign to go to the navy for help.

But on the question of who to send to the Navy for help, trouble arose. Just as the navy has always looked down on the army's "dirt buns," the army has always looked down on the navy's playboys who "worship foreign and flattering foreigners" who even have to eat according to the rules of the British. Who wants to lose this person? In the end, everyone said, "Tsuji-kun caused trouble last time, didn't he deal with it?" Let him make meritorious deeds. So the scourge of Masanobu Tsuji was once again released and sent to the navy. It's hard to say whether the army sent such a scourge with the intention of framing the navy, anyway, Yamamoto didn't say a good word when he mentioned Tsuji Masanobu in his diary. Of course, at that time, Masanobu Tsuji did not say anything good about the navy, and he almost put all the responsibility for the failure of Kuah Island on the navy.

However, at this time, Masanobu Tsuji's impression of the Navy was really good. First of all, the heroic appearance of the Yamato, the world's largest ship with a standard displacement of 65,000 tons and a full load displacement of 72,808 tons, shocked Masanobu Tsuji. Then he was also very touched by the Navy's hospitality to him.

Masanobu Tsuji used to often publicly scold the navy, but this time he came to the land of the navy, and he originally thought that he was going to be abused by the navy. As a result, after boarding the Yamato, Yamamoto didn't have time to see him on the first day, so the navy arranged for him to eat and sleep first. As a result, the misunderstanding came out.

Originally, the navy really prepared a pair of small shoes for him, so he first excused himself that Staff Officer Tsuji was working too hard, so he went to the room to rest first, right? Throw him into the worst guest room on the Yamato. When it was time to eat, I casually took a boxed lunch and threw it to him.

The problem is that Masanobu Tsuji didn't have many opportunities for naval ships before, most recently on July 24 when he was aboard the Navy's destroyer USS Asagi, a 40-year-old warship. I can't eat well and sleep badly. Needless to say, the conditions are so bad. Now that I'm on the Yamato, I'm like Grandma Liu has entered the Grand View Garden. The Navy threw him into the worst guest room, but this guy didn't realize that people were abusing him at all, but thought: The Navy is really interesting, let me live in the same way as in a five-star hotel, not only has a super clean and super soft bed, but also has a separate bathroom, which is full of high-end goods. At least better than anywhere in the Army. When it was time to eat, in order to prevent him from finding out that the navy did not give him good food, the navy simply did not let him go to the restaurant and directly gave him a boxed lunch. But as soon as Masanobu Tsuji opened the lunch box, he found that there was fish and meat in it, which one tasted better. When I recalled the "everyday" diet of the Navy that I had eaten on the destroyer "Asagi," and that I had always spared no effort to attack the Navy, and that the Navy had treated me so generously that the food and accommodation I had eaten and lived in were better than those of a five-star hotel, I was so moved that tears came out of my eyes.

However, Masanobu Tsuji didn't know at this time that one of the functions of the Yamato was really a luxury hotel. After the launch of the world's first battleship, in order to show his cordial concern for the navy, Emperor Hirohito personally stayed on the ship for a few days, followed by a large number of high-ranking officials and nobles. In order to receive the emperor and members of the imperial family who came to inspect, Yamato's accommodation and dining conditions were designed to the highest standards from the beginning. So much so that he deliberately wanted to abuse the army's dirt buns, but people still misunderstood them.

The next day, Masanobu Tsuji met with Isoroku Yamamoto, commander of the Combined Fleet. The conversation between the two went well, and Masanobu Tsuji felt that General Yamamoto was very kind.

In fact, Yamamoto is not kind, and there are two reasons why Masanobu Tsuji feels this way.

First, the navy was built strictly according to the standards of the British Royal Navy, and every move was imitated by the British, and gentlemanly manners were of course included - even if they wanted to bite you to death, they had to put on white gloves before biting you.

Second, Yamamoto himself has a weak heart. The army has done this, in fact, it has also let the navy cheat. And Yamamoto has not yet cultivated to the point where he can harm others like Masanobu Tsuji and still have a face that does not change.

As a result, the Navy once again misunderstood Masanobu Tsuji.

The twin sides agreed, and the Navy agreed to send valuable battleships. Masanobu Tsuji left satisfied.

As soon as Masanobu Tsuji left, Yamamoto once again received instructions from Navy Minister Nagano (that) Shufu: "Don't break the warship!" ”