The anklet with Janeway's body temperature quickly lost its temperature in my hand, and I felt as if I had given her an empty joy, according to the original script, this Chinese New Year's Eve should not be spent like this.

I put the anklet back in my pocket and turned around, Mi Cai was still standing where she was, her hair fluttering from the cold wind, she looked so thin on this extremely cold night.

I walked towards her with heavy steps, but I didn't think she would mind the scene just now, because we never started, so there would be no burden that only those lovers have.

I came to Mi Cai, smiled at her, and then said, "The wind is so cold, why are you standing outside?" ”

"No matter how cold the wind blows from the sky, it only colds the body, and the wind blown by people is cold ...... heart."

I was still immersed in the trance just now, and only after a while did I ask Mi Cai, "How should I understand this?" ”

"Whatever you want, but it's time for us to go in, and a lot of customers are still waiting for a few drinks with you, the bar owner? I came out to call you for them. ”

"Oh."

I answered, and Mi Cai was already walking towards the bar with her head down.

I looked at her back, and then at the sky, and the fireworks that kept bursting in the air blocked my vision, and my eyes stayed in the flickering splendor, and I felt a chill in the wind.

I tucked my clothes and lit a cigarette for myself, maybe this night I can't wait for the spring wind, my heart seems to be trapped in this cold winter by an inexplicable force, and time can't take me away, into the spring, although spring is close at hand.

……

I was so drunk that night I didn't even know how I got back to my accommodation, until I woke up the next morning to the sound of firecrackers.

I sat on the bed for a long time, and then I remembered that I should go back to Xuzhou today, and go back to pay New Year's greetings to my father and mother, I think they are waiting for me at the moment, and they are also waiting for Mi Cai.

I immediately put on my clothes and got up, and instead of going to the bathroom to wash, I went directly to knock on Mi Cai's door, and said "Happy New Year" while knocking...... Happy New Year, are you up? ”

After a long time when no one responded, I twisted the handle of the door, but found that it was locked, and then I had a bad premonition in my heart, and hurriedly rummaged through the cabinets to find the key to the door, but I was stunned when I opened it.

There was no shadow of Mi Cai in the room at all, but the quilt was neatly stacked, which means that Mi Cai was not in this room at the moment, and maybe she left after sending me back last night.

At this time, I understood the meaning of the phrase "No matter how cold the wind blowing from the sky is, it is only cold to the body, and the wind blown by people is cold to the heart...... ".

I also understood that it was my entanglement with Janeway that stung her sensitivity, so she chose to avoid me on the first day of the new year.

But where did she go to avoid it?

I returned to my room with some frustration and wanted to make a call to Mi Cai, but I accidentally found a note pressed under the phone on the cabinet.

I immediately pulled out the note, and as expected, it was indeed left to me by Mi Cai.

"Zhaoyang, I went to my uncle's house for the New Year...... I wish you a happy new year and take me to say a happy new year to your parents. ”

Looking at the smiling face attached to the text, I only felt that my heart was pierced in an instant, and then the pain of hindsight could not stop me from drowning me.

I understand that her pride makes her eyes unable to tolerate a grain of sand, and her insecurity makes her sensitive and suspicious, so she, like me, has been isolating herself from love with a wall of self-fiction, she longs to be close to me, but she is afraid to be close to an impure me.

So my worries and low self-esteem are not groundless...... All my pain comes from liking her, but not the man she needs most.

I folded the note and put it in the cupboard, lit myself a cigarette early in the morning, and half-lay on the bed and smoked, not wanting to explain anything to Mi Cai, because she didn't question me anything.

Furthermore, what is the meaning of a love if it is obtained by constantly explaining?

At this moment, I suddenly didn't want to have any expectations for Mi Cai, and I was willing to maintain a tacit understanding with her, forget the previous ambiguity, and just be an ordinary friend.

After making this decision, I suddenly seemed to have lost a heavy burden, immediately extinguished the cigarette in my hand, and then opened WeChat and sent her a message back: "I wish you a happy new year...... Get back in touch when you get back to Suzhou! ”

After sending the message, I put my phone in my pocket, then simply packed a bag and drove the Alto on the way back to Xuzhou.

On the long road, I felt a little lonely, and I felt more or less regretful in my heart, but I was also glad that the incident of Janeway last night sounded the alarm for me and made me see myself clearly.

Why should I defile the purity of Micai with a messy past and a body that has been involved with many women?

If I have that crystal clear city in my heart, then Mi Cai must also have it, but I am not qualified to be a man in her city.

If I really like her, I should be silently by her side with self-knowledge until she meets the man who should be with her for the rest of her life.

……

It wasn't until 2 o'clock in the afternoon that I returned to Xuzhou, the city I hadn't seen for a long time, and I was embarrassed to press the doorbell when I stood at the door of my house, after all, I had already told Ban Dad that I would bring Mi Cai back, but now I broke my trust in him, and he must be disappointed.

After standing for a minute, I rang the doorbell, and it was my mother who opened the door for me, she looked left and right, and asked, "Zhaoyang, didn't your father say that you want to bring a reliable girl home to show me, what about people?" ”

I laughed and hugged her and said, "Happy New Year, Mom!" …… I miss you! ”

My mother pushed me away, but she didn't have a seizure with me after all, and said helplessly: "You...... I've been in Suzhou for so long, and I haven't seen you become more reliable! ”

"yes, so I can't find a reliable girl."

My mother sighed: "Alas...... There's no way to take you, go into the house, and I'll give you a hot meal. ”

Walking into the house, Ban Dad sat on the sofa and looked back at last night's "Spring Festival Gala", saw that I was back, and subconsciously looked behind me, then put down the remote control and asked, "Where is Xiaomi?" Didn't you say they came back together? ”

Still laughing, I said, "Yes, but she went to her uncle's house for the New Year...... Belch...... It's also very good, after all, having her family with her is much better than coming to Xuzhou for the New Year! ”

I deliberately explained that Ban Dad frowned, he has always been wooden, but his expression at this time was more disappointed than when my mother heard the news, which made me realize: Since I had a relationship with Li Xiaoyun, my mother is not interested in other girls, but Ban Dad has always recognized Mi Cai, maybe there is a difference between the two of them at this point, but this disagreement has caused me more pressure, because at this time, it seems that neither Li Xiaoyun nor Mi Cai is likely to be with me.

In addition to feelings, the most urgent thing I should think about is how to redeem that guitar and return it to Janeway.

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