49. One Hundred Years of Solitude

The night breeze blew, taking away the temperature of the human body with malice, and the sporadic figures in the distant lights couldn't help but shrink their necks. The goose-yellow light shines through the windows on the passers-by, and there is a faint sound of knives and forks colliding, children playing and laughing, and women gently reprimanding.

The pedestrians finally withdrew their greedy gaze, and as usual, they raised their collars and quickened their pace, looking for the light of their own place.

"Home..."

The girl who passed by him muttered to him.

Life is like a journey -- I don't know who said that, it sounds poetic and makes sense, but if you live long enough, you will find that this sentence is incomplete.

It lacks a necessary condition.

The so-called "travel" contains the meaning of "going" and "returning", and if there is no "place to go back", then it is not travel.

Exile.

This is how witches have survived for thousands of years.

It wasn't her choice.

She tried.

She also naively thought that nothing was invincible, as long as she worked hard enough, as long as she worked harder・・・・・・

At least, what can be changed・・・・・・

At that time, she didn't know the horror of "time".

"Family", "friends", "affection", "thoughts", "beliefs", and even "memories" ・・・・・・ all these things, human beings, are so fragile and worthless in the face of "time".

Human beings should have a "choice" in order to have an "end".

As the little imp said, if it is immortal, then what is the point of all this qiē?

And when she is deprived of all her choices, the last way left is "fate".

Alone, keep going.

The girl laughed silently.

She wasn't angry with that little ghost at all, even after he brutally used herself and killed the child she had raised in an almost inhumane way.

It's not the first time she's experienced this kind of thing, it's not so much that she has produced antibodies, but that the same scar has healed and then been torn open countless times, and the pain nerve has already died.

Sooner or later, the child would have died.

Maybe it will end up in old age, maybe it will be an accident, maybe it will die at the hands of others, or it may end one's own life.

Same result, different ways.

She wasn't angry at all.

She's used to it.

The body is immortal, but the human heart grows old.

Time, giving, and taking away, so long and reciprocating, over and over again, has no end.

Time, invisible, intangible, but everywhere, just so quietly, flowing bit by bit, erasing the part that still belongs to her.

Like a hamster in its chest, waiting, gazing at the ruins, it pounced on the fresh, sprouted of the sprout of hope and devoured it all as it always had done when it trembled again.

The world has never changed・・・・・・

The next intersection she'll turn right, and the next one she'll meet someone, maybe something's going to happen, and then keep going.

Next, you have to...

"Where are you going?"

A cold voice sounded behind him.

C.C turned his head blankly, and it took a long time to recognize the other party.

"Yo, Lelouch."

This was the first time Lelouch had seen this kind of expression appear on C.C's face, dazed, trance-like, like the walking dead, if you want to describe it, like a certain eleven who has just come with a referian.

Lelouch's brow furrowed even tighter.

"Come back with me."

"Going back?"

C.C was stunned for a moment, and then couldn't help but laugh out loud, laughing so much that he even bent down, but without the slightest joy.

"You don't understand anything, do you? Hahaha..."

"What are you talking about?"

Lelouch ignored her, and the shooter grabbed her wrist and tried to pull her away.

I thought I would be resisted, but I didn't expect that the girl just walked behind him obediently, wiping away the tears of laughter with the back of her hand.

Lelouch stopped in confusion and looked back at her.

"Did that little ghost sue you?" C.C asked first.

"Hmm."

Ylan called him after the incident and told him what had happened. Lelouch only knew that he had killed a person who tried to threaten his Geass abilities, but he did not know what had happened.

Don't worry, I've already done it for you, but I'm afraid that my sister-in-law's love will fluctuate a lot, Brother Huang, you are a veteran of the love field, and the most vulnerable time for girls is the easiest time to get it, you know, right--This is Yilan's original words, and Lelouch can feel that the white hair on the other end of the phone is giving a thumbs up.

"What did that kid do?"

"Kill my ex." Still with a smile and cynical tone.

"I asked, what did that kid do to you?"

"Ah, is it the feeling of brothers? I'm such a guilty woman..."

“C.C!”

No, this is not the usual witch, this is not her, something went wrong, it must be asked here.

Lelouch pressed her against the wall and looked at her fiercely. The girl lowered her head, and the long hair on her forehead blocked her expression.

C.C glanced at the hand on his shoulder and laughed again.

"You two are exactly the same in some places."

"I'm not interested in guessing the riddle. Now, sue me for what really happened. Lelouch said word by word. Where were you going? ”

"Where am I going to go・・・・・・ I want to know myself."

[Bang! 】

Lelouch slammed his fist into the wall beside the girl.

The knuckles that had not been tempered and did not know how to punch to protect themselves, C.C could even feel the blood splashing on his face.

She slowly raised her head and looked into Lelouch's eyes, there was no sparkle in her amber eyes.

"You want to hug me? Or do you want to hit me? ”

Lelouch shuddered, and the hand that grabbed her shoulder loosened.

"Is that so?" Lelouch's voice trembled slightly. "Is that what you think of me?"

"Isn't it?"

“・・・・・・”

C.C brushed his hand away, ignored him, turned and walked away alone.

In the end, he is just like those people, but his pride does not allow him to show it.

If you want to get yourself, or you want to kill yourself, or both, there are only three people in the world.

"What you want, I can give you."

Lelouch's words stopped her.

"'Death'. Right? ”

C.C turned to look at him, his eyes filled with doubt.

"How could you..."

"That kid sued me and took away your code, that's the condition of the contract, isn't it?"

“・・・・・・”

"I'll kill you, after that." Lelouch looked at her with a determined look in his eyes.

"After the end of the qiē?"

"Follow me, in the dead country of Britannia, the new world I promised Nanali and Yuphimia was built on the ruins of the empire, and after this qiē, if you still want to end, I will give you what you want."

Lelouch walked up to her and said in a provocative tone.

"Don't take yourself too seriously, how many empires do you think I've seen? How many civilizations do you think I've seen the fall and fall? The so-called 'history' that you have learned, you have learned about every king in the textbooks, but just like you, they are my contractors. If you think you can make me change my mind..." "What do you think is special?"

"I know you better than they do."

"Ahem! Ahem, you, you say... The girl was stunned and wanted to laugh, but she coughed violently because she was too anxious.

"I know you better than they do." The corners of Lelouxiu's mouth lifted slightly, and he looked at C.C with a winning look. "I know you better than you do."

"Tell me about it." C.C folded his arms in disdain and tilted his head to look at him.

"You have to be gentler than you think."

"Ah, I see, the former?"

C.C shook his head in disappointment, classifying him as wanting to hug himself.

"If the people you choose are all emperors, then they must all be decisive and ruthless characters who can afford to let go, but why have you survived until now?"

"What do you mean?"

"How many emperors didn't want to live forever, how many emperors didn't want to 'borrow another five hundred years from heaven'? And you, not only gave them strength, but also gave them almost at their fingertips, the ultimate dream of the king. But none of them, none of them have taken your CODE for thousands of years, why is that? ”

“・・・・・・”

"Why, they'd rather die than take your life?" Lelouch raised his hand to brush away her forehead, looked at the red bird-like mark with a complicated gaze, and gently pressed his hand up. "It's not that hard at all, is it?"

"Because you are so good to them that they are willing to die for you." Lelouch said softly.

“・・・・・・”

・・・・・・ Mao ・・・・・・・・・・

"This can't be acting, no one can act for hundreds of years, if so, they should also show themselves like a witch, so that they won't hesitate when they start. But, you can't. Even if you've seen so much human ugliness, you can't hurt others.

Because you are a gentle man,

That's your nature,

Not kindness, but gentleness.

You want to make yourself look like a bad person, you want to use vicious words to make people disgusted with you, you deliberately emphasize your inhuman side, you don't want to have any contact with me outside of work. You really wish I could kill you.

But to be honest, I don't want to.

It is impossible for a person who is truly bent on death to be gentle with others, and it is impossible for a person who is completely desperate for the world to accompany a blind girl to origami cranes. I don't believe that a dead heart can smile while collecting pizza stickers.

You're not trying to die.

You're just too tired and want to close your eyes.

I can't promise you anything, but I'll look for a solution as the king of the new world after this qiē is over. If I can't do it in my lifetime, then I'll fulfill my contract. ”

"In my lifetime..."

C.C didn't speak, lowered his head as if thinking about something, and muttered after a long time.

"A hundred years of life is just a blink of an eye for you, right?"

Fingers slid down the girl's cheek, dragging her chin and holding her face up. Lelouch looked her in the eye, looking for answers.

C.C avoided his gaze.

100 Years of Life・・・・・・

Life・・・If there are only 100 years・・・・・・

You can be integrated into the world, not just as a background being, not just as an observer, really as a "person"・・・・・・...

・・・I should be able to remember the names of those flowers more seriously, right?

For a long time, a sigh.

"You two are really the same." As she spoke, she pushed his hand away.

"Huh?"

"Is this kind of small action hereditary?"

"Small movements? ・・・・・・That's right! Or what the hell did that kid do to you?! Lelouch thought it sounded weird, and it took him a while to react.

"Can you stop touching me like this in the next few years?" The moment her fingers touched her jaw, her back felt a chill in her conditioned back.

It's not because I remembered what the imp did.

She felt like she was being targeted by something again. The malice that has tormented her for thousands of years, called "time".

At that moment, it seemed that something sprouted in my heart.

Time was watching, thinking, brewing, and waiting with cruel patience for the harvest to come.

A new reincarnation.

"Lelouch, can you do it? Enemies of this world? C.C turned around and whispered behind his hands.

"Isn't that what I'm doing?"

"You still don't understand anything・・・・・・ C.C sighed and looked up at the starry sky.

"What about your answer?"

"Why did ・・・・・・ do that? All you need is the ability I give you, don't you? ”

"We should be accomplices."

"Wordplay." C.C disdains such ambiguous answers.

Lelouch pondered for a moment, and finally turned his heart on the side.

"You are the most advantageous weapon against Geass, I am grateful for the opportunity you gave me, you are one of the few people I can talk to, I am curious about your abilities and the past, it is sad to stay around, etc., there are many reasons, but at the end of the day・・・・・・ I may really belong to what you call the 'former'."

C.C didn't expect this answer, and his eyes widened in surprise.

"Is this a confession?"

"Whatever you want."

The man's voice behind him became rough, and he seemed to realize that he had said something terrible, and if he turned around now, he should have seen his embarrassment as he forced his composure.

A smile unconsciously appeared on the girl's face.

"I didn't think you could really say it, how does it feel to let go of your self-esteem?"

"It's worse than I thought."

Leluxiu said bluntly, it is rare that there is no repulsion. This kind of thing, the person who speaks first is already equivalent to admitting defeat.

The girl turned around and looked at him with interest for a moment.

It wouldn't seem good if he could really sleep in this man's arms・・・・・・

"Let's go." C.C stepped forward and grabbed his wrist and said in a brisk tone. "Say... 'Do you see me like this?' Well? ”

"Shut up."

Lelouxiu's body stiffened, and he instinctively wanted to withdraw his hand, but was firmly grasped by the girl.

"Is this the kind of plot of 'the male protagonist who finally woke up, running under the moon to confess for love'?"

"Shut up."

"When did it start? Find yourself unable to take your eyes off me anymore? ”

"You're endless..."

Lelouch twisted his head to the side and walked beside the girl.

"How do you explain it to Xiali when you go back? Ahh ”

"Then I'll just say nothing."

"That's not going to work. Haven't you realized? ”

There was a smile in the girl's tone.

"I've got the handle, but it's a lifetime thing."