A moment later, I went downstairs with Fang Yuan, he got into the company's business car, and I sat in Yan Yan's car.

My nerves fell into inexplicable colic, and I even complained in my heart that Fang Yuan shouldn't have told me so suddenly that Jian Wei would come back, after 3 years, I didn't know what to use to face her.

I've been crazy for countless days and nights trying to see her, but I'm afraid to see her...... Fear of silence and embarrassment after meeting is too painful.

Yan Yan started the car, looked at the rearview mirror and changed lanes, and asked me, "Zhaoyang, why do you look preoccupied?" After asking, he shook his head and added, "...... Kind of not quite like you! ”

I smiled and said, "Do you have to be heartless to be like me?" ”

"It's Fang Yuan's news that Jian Wei will be back, right?"

"Hmm." I answered, but opened the window and lit a cigarette.

"No wonder, except for Janeway, no one in this world can pry your Zhaoyang's melancholy nerves!" Yan Yan sighed.

"You think too much, she's not so aggressive, and I'm not so vulnerable." I still smiled in response.

Yan Yan shrugged her shoulders and said, "Zhaoyang, you know how cold and warm you are...... The brighter you smile, the more your heart hurts. ”

"It's like you know me better." This time, I finally put away the smile that Yan Yan thought was a disguise, to prove that I was not as hurt as she said.

"So many years of friends, I don't know you who understands you...... Zhaoyang, let's talk to you from the heart, although we all feel sorry for you and Jian Wei, but ...... I also have to tell you: when a woman changes her mind, the man she once loved has become a second-hand smoke that has been smoked, and she can no longer breathe in pleasure, and she smokes her own red eyes, and the only thing she can do at this time is to abandon this second-hand smoke, do you know what I mean? ”

"What are you talking to me about?" I asked, taking a deep puff of my cigarette.

"I hope you're smart."

I was silent for a long time and asked unwillingly, "What do you say is love?" …… Isn't it just a promise, and then a lifetime of perseverance! Why did you give the other party a promise, but you didn't have the courage to be persistent? ”

"Zhaoyang, love is really not as simple as you think, why did Fang Yuan and I go to the end, but you and Jian Wei can't, you should understand."

I was silent again, I did understand that although Fang Yuan and Yan Yan were not wealthy families, their family backgrounds were not bad, and they could be said to be the right match, and Jian Wei and I ...... I distinctly remember that before Janeway went abroad, her dad bought her a Cadillac CTS as a graduation gift...... But does love really have to be measured by material things? I don't really understand!

Yan Yan said again: "Jian Wei really loved you, you also know that she went to the United States to study in order to avoid her parents' forced marriage, hoping to stay for 3 years, after returning to China, her parents can accept the fact that she is with you, but why did she break up with you after arriving in the United States, I also can't figure it out...... Probably really because of ......"

I didn't want to repeat the feeling I felt when I broke up, so I interrupted Yan Yan: "Stop, like you said, when she changes her mind, when I am a second-hand smoke that can't breathe pleasure." ”

"I said she changed her mind just as an analogy," Yan Yan comforted again......

There is a kind of person in this world, they have a special ability to comfort a person who wants to die to really die, there is no doubt that Yan Yan is.

……

Throughout the day, I accompanied Yan Yan to buy the relevant items for their marriage according to the list issued by Fang Yuan, and it was not until the evening that I had a simple meal with Yan Yan and dispersed.

Although I didn't sleep all night yesterday and did another day of hard work today, when the night was approaching, I didn't have a trace of sleep, walking on the street, every time I saw the couples snuggling past me under the neon lights, my heart swelled up with endless loneliness and emptiness.

I still habitually want to empty myself, as if my night should belong to a nightclub, and I tell myself: maybe drink some wine and sleep more soundly tonight.

Listening to the loud bar music, watching the changing and flickering lights, the people twisting their waists like crazy, after a while I had a few bottles of beer in my stomach, people were also a little dizzy, I liked this feeling, there was no trouble, no love and hatred, only the haze and illusion that was both true and false.

There are two resident bands in this bar, and the two bands take turns performing every night, and today it happens to be Robben's "Tearing Nerves" band, and I have a good relationship with Robben, and sometimes we play music together.

Robben stuck his fingers on the guitar strings, made a noise similar to friction, and smiled teasingly at me: "Zhaoyang, come up and play......?" ”

I put down the beer bottle, jumped onto the stage, took the guitar from Robben, and said to the rest of the band, "Come back to the sun." ”

Everyone nodded, various instruments began to sound, and the heavy metal music began to expand under the flickering lights.

With a drunken vent, I stepped on the prop in the shape of an ammunition box with one foot, and began to play the electric guitar frantically, singing in a roaring plosive sound: "The utopian hand dragged the flag, the coat tucked my bones, desperately remembered the route from which I came, turned around and smashed against the wall; Mom, I can't come back; Mom, you're a little tired, Mom, give birth to me, give birth...... Raise your throat and tear your neck open......"

Only halfway through the song, the young man with long hair, a black jacket, and a gold chain stared at me and yelled at me, "What kind of bird are you singing...... Hurry up and change the song ......"

I stopped and squinted at him: "Your grandson will tell me again." ”

Long hair kicked over the nearest drum kit: "You stupid, Lao Tzu asked you to change the song!" ”

"Uncle ***......" I stood on a high place, kicked in the face of the long hair, as if to find the pleasure of venting, and then jumped off the platform and smashed the guitar, and in a blink of an eye the guitar was smashed by me, and the long hair was also beaten and curled up on the ground with his head and screaming heartbreakingly.

A couple of people with long hair rushed towards me with beer bottles, but Robben and the band members blocked me, and in the confusion I saw someone call the police, so I threw away the remains of my guitar and ran out of the bar.

……

In the interrogation room of the police station, the lights were shining on me, and sitting across from me was an elderly policeman who looked quite kind.

"Name, gender, age, place of work."

"It's not...... Brother policeman, that grandson is really underbeaten, it was he who kicked our drum kit first, you know we play music, the instrument is our own brother, he beat my own brother, can I live with him? …… Brother policeman, it's not like I want to fight, it's really that there are bad people in the masses!! I said with a sad face.

"You kid don't talk nonsense, no matter how many reasons you have, it's not right to fight, the law doesn't give you this right, you know?"

"Brother policeman, I know that I am wrong, I have done a very deep introspection and review in my heart, I should not ignore the majesty of the law, I will definitely raise my consciousness in the future, be a good citizen who abides by the law, and resolutely do not drag down the harmonious society!"

"Alright, don't be stinking poor! …… Go and pay the fine. ”

"Not detained, right?" I asked cautiously.

"The young man who was beaten by you also suffered some skin trauma, he agreed to go private, and you compensated him for the cost of going to the hospital and lost work, plus a fine, a total of 6,000 yuan."

“6000！！！ …… Brother policeman, I don't have so much money with me! ”

"Call your family, friends."

When I heard the words family and friends, I was suddenly confused, and I really felt how lonely I was in this city where I had lived for two years.

I definitely can't find Fang Yuan or Yan Yan, firstly, they are close to getting married, and I don't want to provoke this trouble to them, and secondly, they have expressed their hope to me countless times that they hope that I will live a safe and stable life, and it is better not to let them know about such things, for fear that they will be disappointed!

……

After thinking about it for a long time, the excessively beautiful face that hated me so much came to my mind.

Looking for Micai, yes, looking for Micai! Anyway, I am a scumbag in her eyes, and I have no image at all, so let her help me pay the fine first, and then pay her back next week with the money I owed before.

At this time, I was really glad that I had written down her mobile phone number in the morning.

I took out my mobile phone from my pocket, found Mi Cai's number, and dialed it out.