I have never experienced what the atmosphere of death is like, but it must be associated with sadness.

There are many things that must pass that we cannot control, such as life; Many of the feelings that must be expressed, we missed the best period, such as family affection; This shijie always likes to leave regrets, and then let future generations endlessly remember.

On the third day after Fang Wenke and Zhao Jun went to visit their father, his father left this shijie in his sleep without warning.

Life is ending here, and it is also the end of the father-son relationship that has just started.

After Fang Wenke heard the bad news at home, he sat on the ground with weak legs, and he didn't say a word for half an hour.

It seems that in the past half hour, he has been constantly filtering the pictures from childhood to adulthood in his mind, and he is arresting those clips about his father. He tried his best to engrave them in his memory, but the memory became wet and blurry with the tears in the corners of his eyes.

It turns out that in this strange definition of life, once any complaint collides with death, it will be unconditionally forgiven.

Fang Wenke forgave his father's belated fatherly love, but he couldn't forgive himself for not having time to fulfill his filial piety.

When Fang Wenke and I rushed to the hospital, my father's face had been covered by a white sheet, and he didn't have time to take a look at his remains after all.

The silence in the hospital room gave one the feeling of being about to suffocate. Grandpa sat straight on the edge of the bed, his back to us without saying a word. He half-squinted, staring at his son on the hospital bed, as if he was passing on something, as if saying goodbye.

Grandpa's green hair is particularly dazzling against the backdrop of the light outside the window, which is how many years have passed.

The white-haired man sent the black-haired man away, a silent tribute from an old man who was nearly eighty years old to his son.

Fang Wenke and I stood behind my grandfather, not daring to make a sound. Neither of us dared to take a step forward, for fear of disturbing my grandfather, and even more afraid of waking up the person who had lost his soul.

At this time, Zhao Jun walked in with a stack of formalities.

Zhao Jun's eyes were blood-red and swollen, and he looked like he had just cried bitterly.

It turns out that men also have such fragile times, when facing family affection, when facing life and death.

"You're here." Zhao Jun said in a hoarse voice.

"Grandpa has been sitting here for a long time, and we didn't dare to disturb him." I whispered to Zhao Jun.

"I've been sitting for half an hour, and I haven't said a word, just sitting." Zhao Jun coughed twice and said.

However, the sensitive Fang Wenke still felt that his grandfather was a little strange, so he stepped forward worriedly and patted his grandfather on the shoulder. However, Grandpa was motionless, and even his back became dim in that instant.

Zhao Jun also noticed that something was wrong with his grandfather, and hurriedly grabbed his grandfather's shoulders, only to find that his grandfather's face was no longer bloodless, and it was as pale as the sheets on the hospital bed.

Zhao Jun shook like crazy, but his grandfather still didn't react, as if everything in front of him had nothing to do with him.

Zhao Jun collapsed and knelt on the ground, he shouted loudly to his grandfather out of control, but his grandfather couldn't hear it anymore, his wrinkled eyes were half-squinted, and his head was shaken to the side by Zhao Jun.

Grandpa stopped breathing due to a sudden heart irritation, and Grandpa passed away, along with his father.

At this time, goose feather snow fell outside the window of the hospital, and it was the first snow in the city.

Everything is about to be covered in snow, covered with heartbreaking memories, covered with pain that you don't want to express.

This winter full of stories has come, but the people you love the most have left.

"I watched you grow up beside me, so zuihou for a moment, I also want to watch you leave me. Child, I can't let you go, so I'll go with you. "

After the father and grandfather were declared dead, the funeral was held the next day, and it was Fang Wenke and Zhao Jun's mother Fang Yun.

After Fang Yun learned of the death of her ex-husband and grandfather, she pushed off all her work schedule and took on the obligation of holding a funeral.

Throughout the funeral, Fang Yun was busy alone. She hadn't laughed or cried all day. She seems to be a numb individual, doing her filial piety and her love.

In the corner, I sat with Fang Wenke and Zhao Jun, who hadn't eaten all day, let alone said a word. He just stared blankly at the two men in the black and white frame, one was his grandfather and the other was his father, the two most important people in his life.

Fang Wenke sat beside me, handed me a few pieces of bread on the table, and said, "Eat something!" You've been busy all day. ”

I took the bread from Fang Wenke's hand and asked, "Does your mother still love your father?" ”

"It's supposed to be love, because when she's sad, she's like this, not laughing or crying." Fang Wenke replied to me in a weak voice.

"Then what about Weishenme wanting to divorce in the first place?" I pressed on.

"Because of different values, my mother is vain, and my father is indifferent to fame and fortune." Fang Wenke turned his eyes to look at Zhao Jun, who was godless beside him.

"And are they still in love?"

"Dad loves Mommy." Zhao Jun suddenly interjected and said his first sentence of the day.

I stared straight at Zhao Jun, holding the freshly opened bread in my hand, looking forward to his next sentence.

"Dad loves Mom, and Dad hasn't looked for another woman for so many years, just because he can't let go of her in his heart. In the past few years of my mother's business, my father has been paying attention to her, and when my mother's business first started, my father asked a friend to help her, but my mother never knew about it. Zhao Jun snorted twice, he felt that his words were a little pale.

Fang Wenke lowered his head on the side, not wanting others to see his tears surging again.

The three of us were silent, not knowing how to proceed with the topic, as if it was a dead proposition, with no results and no point in discussion.

Suddenly, there were a few sobs behind us, and I subconsciously turned around and saw Fang Yun raining down tears.

Their mother cried, because the sadness was too strong, and she defeated the pretense of strength in her heart.

What have the years taken away? Does it take away innocence, or does it take away health?

We are always in the process of losing, constantly having, and you think you have succeeded, but you don't know that you have lost the most important thing.

I finally admitted Zhao Jun's sentence "Dad loves Mom", because Fang Yun didn't love their father. They are just too stubborn, and no one is willing to take a step back in the face of choice.

They thought that stubbornness could be exchanged for each other's obedience, but they lost each other's company in their persistence, and then went further and further.

You don't know your true heart until you really lose, you lose, so you fall in love.

Actually, love has always been there.