In our hometown, everyone's conversations are straightforward, and they rarely turn corners, but in the capital, everyone likes to hold it when they speak, that is, they pretend, especially the local people in the capital, who have a sense of arrogance in their bones, and the simple dialogue is not easy to say, so they must be held. Pen? Interesting? Pavilion wWw. ｂiquge。 ｉｎfo

It's like this Shengge Rinpoche, when I asked him what he was called, his mouth was closed, his eyes were empty, as if he didn't hear me, and he had to answer from his disciple.

This is in our hometown, and I would have spat on it a long time ago. I learned it from those Hutong strings and eight banners, and I didn't learn the good habits, but it was just some stinky problems.

At the moment, he arched his hand and introduced himself: "I am Zhang Fa, Miss Lin Yurou's plenipotentiary agent, the master may wish to say it directly, Miss Lin entrusts me with full authority." ”

The great monk looked at me at this time, looked up and down, and asked, "You are less than thirty, right?" ”

I smiled and praised: "The master has good eyesight, contemptible, Chinese New Year's Eve six, he learned a few hands and feet when he was young, so his appearance does not look old." ”

This is nonsense, but also helpless, I am young, it is a short board, the so-called hairless mouth, not speaking firmly, twenty-year-old little fart monkey monkey, who takes it seriously?

Not to mention the seventeen or eighteen-year-old days in the novel, the mythical story Nezha slays the dragon at the age of three, and in reality, the little doll with no power can only be a minion for others.

When I heard that I was Chinese New Year's Eve six today, the great monk's face changed, his body stood up straight, he looked at me carefully, and asked, "What kind of kung fu did Mr. learn?" ”

I laughed, "Tong Zigong." ”

The master understood, "So far, Yuanyang has not been leaked? ”

I nodded, "I haven't had any dreams." ”

The master made a sudden appearance, "No wonder, since this is the case, let me tell you, originally you asked me to observe Feng Shui, I can do my duty, but I am compassionate, I can't see the disaster happen and not rescue, I look at Miss Lin's face, the heavenly court is high and convex, the cheeks are high and fleshy, the mountain roots are straight, the face is square and the jaw is moist, it should be a happy appearance, but under a closer look, I saw dark clouds covering my head, the atrium was dim, my eyes were red, and my complexion was vain, I was afraid that something bad would happen. ”

After talking about it for a while, I didn't understand, so I scratched my head and asked, "Can the master simply say that I don't have much culture." ”

The master was stunned, and the apprentice behind him explained: "Miss Lin has a rich and prosperous career, but she is not in good health, and something bad may happen." ”

I asked again, "What murder?" To put it bluntly, I can represent it all. ”

The master hesitated, waved his apprentice away, and said in a low voice, "Is Miss Lin pregnant?" ”

I nodded, looking stunned, "Master, can this be calculated?" ”

The master waved his hand, "It's a piece of cake, listen to me, it's a big deal, it's not trivial, if you can represent it plenipotentially, you have to make a decision as soon as possible, otherwise, Miss Lin's fetus in her womb is afraid that it will not be guaranteed." ”

I'm annoying these gods to bluff people, first saying that people are rich and noble, and then saying that there is danger, especially the child in Lin Yurou's belly is mine, he just said some inauspicious words, if it weren't for the fear of causing trouble to Lin Yurou, I would like to give the monk a brick on his head now.

At the moment, he asked in a low voice, "How to decide?" ”

The master glanced at me and said, "Even if you are the father of the child, I can't say these words to you, I still have to let Miss Lin come in person." ”

This is amazing, the great monk not only counted Lin Yurou pregnant, but also counted me as the father of the child? This time, I couldn't accept it, thinking that he had some ability, so I quit and told Lin Yurou.

Lin Yurou went to see the master by herself, avoiding me, the two of them chirped and muttered, more than half an hour, Lin Yurou came back, her face was not good, "I'm tired today, let's go back first." ”

When I went back to the hotel, Lin Yurou sighed and sighed, pulled me aside, and asked, "Ah Fa, will you be good to me?" ”

Yes, is this still doubtful? I rolled up my sleeves and showed my chest, "If you don't believe me, I'll show you my chest." ”

Lin Yurou waved her hand and turned her head over, "I'll tell you seriously, you are a little younger than me, and you really don't feel a loss if you marry me?" ”

The two of them have been good for more than ten days, Lin Yurou asked this kind of thing three times, I answered three times, and today I took it out and asked again, which is inevitably boring. I replied, "You don't believe me, what can I do?" Then he asked, "Did the old monk tell you something that made you undecided?" ”

Lin Yurou sighed, thought for a long time, and asked, "I'm also going to worship a guru, do you say it's okay?" ”

"No way!" I jumped high in an instant, some time ago I was familiar with Akai, and I knew from Akai's mouth that Chaoyang District is a gathering place for celebrities, and it is also a place where living Buddhas gather, the so-called worship of the master, men donate money, women donate their bodies, but where they apprentice, double cultivation is a matter of time or time.

Women worship Buddha to seek inner peace and attain the supreme Dharma, double cultivation is the only way to go. Akai said that those Rinpoche translated the secret method of double cultivation into the vernacular, the content was unsightly, and the most ** little yellow text could not reach that level, but female celebrities believed in Buddhism, and flocked to it, to put it bluntly, they were engaged in master and apprenticeship****** and the most disgusting thing was that they couldn't tell outsiders after they had finished lewd, and they would suffer a dumb loss. Once the master deceives the female celebrity's body, he will become a parasite, and he will never give up until he squeezes the last drop of blood out of the female disciple.

Lin Yurou retorted: "What you have heard are all rumors of Yeluzi, the real virtuous monk, the five roots are pure, how can it be like what you said." ”

I waved my hand, "Where are there still great virtuous monks, the host has asked people to expose that they have illegitimate children and are still raising mistresses outside, that is, those idiots believe in Buddhism, and they dare not go." ”

Lin Yurou saw that I was resolute, so I didn't say it anymore, but I was unhappy, I didn't laugh or talk when I sat there, and I didn't want to eat in the afternoon, so I sulked.

I thought that I must have gone against her will and made her unhappy, so I thought of a way to make her laugh. I wanted to help her bathe before going to bed at night, but she was refused.

Yesterday was not like that, the two of them sat in the large bathtub and had a great time.

When Lin Yurou finished taking a bath, she didn't give her the same bed, and said with a dark face: "You go back to sleep tonight, I'll be quiet." ”

I used to hear people say that a woman's heart, a needle under the sea, can't see clearly, can't guess through, but now I can be regarded as a teacher, these mature women in their thirties, their minds are much more elusive than girls in seventeen or eighteen.

I went outside, called Director Chen, and asked him for an idea.

Director Chen is also depressed these days, and when he heard that I had something, he asked me to go to Guanchengyuan's house.

I was also in a hurry to catch the blind, everyone went to the door of the community, and I remembered the first time I went to the door of Director Chen's house, empty-handed, not like words. If there is only one Director Chen, it is okay, the key is that there may be a wife in the family.

Speaking of Director Chen's family, it is also talked about in the circle, first lived with a famous host, and later broke up and married a famous movie star of his family, anyway, there is no director in the circle who does not envy Director Chen, they all say that he is worth his life, and the two wives before and after are all first-class beauties.

I bought gifts in the supermarket next to me, it looks like I don't know what to buy, I don't have money to buy expensive, I don't have to be cheap, I think about it, I bought a bag of rice imported from Thailand and a barrel of cooking oil, regardless of whether he is genetically modified or non-GMO, pick up the most expensive one to buy.

After going up, it was also a coincidence, the one who opened the door was a big man, looking familiar, but I didn't know where I had seen it, he enthusiastically helped me get oil and rice, and greeted the house, "Lao Chen, this is your relative?" ”

After entering the house, Mrs. Chen was also there, and sure enough, it was the same as what appeared on TV, graceful and luxurious, and generous, so panicked that I didn't know whether to reach out or give up, I didn't know whether to call a teacher or an aunt, and finally held back a sentence, I am your fan.

The big man said, "Since there are guests at home, I won't bother, let's talk another day." ”

The big man walked out, Mrs. Chen went to send it, greeted warmly in the elevator, and waited for people to go down, I slapped my thigh and exclaimed, I was annoyed, that is the famous master who played Kangxi, I borrowed from the sky for another five hundred years, and now I don't know anyone when I see it.

At the moment, I remembered the name of Guancheng Park in my heart, and then came back to block Mr. Chen.

But he said that when he saw Director Chen, he was really depressed, sitting at home drinking and chatting with Teacher Chen. Blame me first when you meet, come and buy something.

Mrs. Chen praised me, "Xiao Zhang can pinch and calculate, and it just so happens that there is no oil or rice at home." "After saying that, I went to the kitchen to stir-fry, and I didn't ask if I had eaten, it was very natural to prepare, and the enthusiasm was not pretentious.

Director Chen asked me what was going on, but I had a hard time, I couldn't talk about my relationship with Lin Yurou, so I vaguely used her instead, and said that I went to see the great monk, especially the big monk is pregnant, I don't accept it, I came to Director Chen today, just to ask, is this Rinpoche iron-mouthed divine calculation, is it true or false?

Director Chen laughed, "You don't need to check the pulse to know that a woman is pregnant, this is not a skill, any dog can know it." ”

I couldn't figure it out.

Director Chen said: "Because of the dog's nose, a woman is pregnant, and a woman can smell it." ”

I laugh at what I say, but a monk is not a dog.

Director Chen said: "There is a cow man in Shenzhen, who sells sanitary napkins, has been on TV, he has a stunt, shake hands with women, you know whether women have menstruation, the host doesn't believe it, and ten women are called up on the spot, shake hands with him one by one, one says one is accurate, do you say God or not?" ”

And said: "He explained himself, when a woman has menstruation, the temperature on her hands is different from usual, he can feel it, if he doesn't say so, he says that he has clairvoyant eyes, and can see whether a woman has pads, and then inspect it on the spot, one test and one accurate, if you are you, are you afraid?" ”

Speaking of this, it happened that Mrs. Chen came over with the dishes and plucked Director Chen with her eyes, "The older you get, the more immodest you are, what do you say to your children." ”

I listened to it strangely, so I asked Director Chen to continue.

Director Chen said: "To be a director, you have to understand more, astronomy and geography have to be understood from ancient times to the present, humanities and nature, less is not enough, the great monk can export the estimation of a woman's pregnancy, it is nothing more than the same as a doctor, looking, smelling, asking, cutting the old four, women are pregnant, there are more or less phenomena on the face, it's just that we ordinary people don't pay attention to it, don't pay attention to it, but the doctor can roughly know at a glance, what disease a woman has, can it be said that those doctors are immortals? ”

I understand, no wonder the big monk began to sniff when he entered the door, staring at Lin Yurou with a soft face, it turned out that he was secretly thinking about it, and he wanted to kill Lin Yurou.

Speaking of Rinpoche again, Director Chen closed his eyes, took a sip of wine, and waved his hand, "There is no way to do this, if it is left in Chairman Mao's time, they dare not be so blatant, but now the world is different, and there are many deceitful people." But we can't blame everyone else, what is a Buddha? Buddha is a faith, is to guide people to do good, was crooked by the crooked mouth monk sang, you can't blame the Buddha, you have to blame...... Who do you blame? ”

I said blame the crooked-mouthed monk.

Director Chen waved his hand, "No, blame those who do bad things." Do you know why Buddhism is popular now? Because there are too many bad things to do, and there are too many people who are afraid of ghosts knocking on the door at night, what is a Buddha? Buddha is a good thing, no matter how many people you kill, you can become a Buddha on the ground if you put down the butcher's knife in one sentence, and if you do a good thing in your life and do a bad thing, you will fall into hell. If you think about it, when the Buddha comes out, good people don't dare to do bad things, bad people do bad things desperately, and when they have done enough bad things, they become Buddhas on the spot. ”

I was listening carefully, and Mrs. Chen slapped the table over there, "Old Chen, you have drunk too much, go to sleep." ”

Seeing this, I got up and knew that Mrs. Chen was an eviction order.

Director Chen didn't follow and pulled me: "Sit down, let's talk again, it's rare to have time today, let's talk to you about the big truths in the world, our film and television industry, don't talk about those messes, just talk about film and television, you know, why are our domestic films becoming more and more bad in recent years?" ”

I replied, "The actor didn't play well. ”

Director Chen slapped the table hard, "Wrong! ”

I said, "The director is not good." ”

Director Chen still waved his hand, "Wrong! ”

I won't," you said. ”

Director Chen said: "It's because some people don't want us to make good films, and some people don't want our country's films to be strong, and they know what it means to be a layman in charge of an insider?" You know? Who knows what kind of people are in charge of Chinese movies? It's a bunch of uneducated pigs! It is these pigs who hinder the development of Chinese films. Speaking of excitement, Director Chen coughed repeatedly, and Mrs. Chen hurriedly patted him on the back, blaming him in her mouth: "I said that I can't drink it, I can't drink it, I have to do it." ”

As soon as he finished speaking, Director Chen coughed loudly and spit out a mouthful of blood.

Immediately, the corners of my eyes flew slanted, my eyebrows raised, and I knew that something bad was going to happen, so I hurriedly called and notified the ambulance.

Mrs. Chen said: "No, just help me go, I'll drive to the hospital." ”

The doctor diagnosed that Chen Dao had stomach bleeding, but fortunately it was delivered in time and there was no major problem.

I thought Director Chen would be unconscious like in the film and television drama, but no, in the middle of the night, he was full of energy, he wanted to go to the toilet, he wanted to drink water, and he was as happy as a donkey.

Seeing this, I dispelled my inner doubts, at first I thought that he married a wife who was sixteen years younger than himself, and I was afraid that his health was not good, but now it seems that I think too much, and the two of them are in harmony.

Before leaving, Director Chen advised: "According to what I said, watch more, learn more, think more, this drama will definitely be filmed." ”

This is unusual, and I haven't heard anyone say that this drama can't be filmed.

Director Chen's words will be put aside first, I will take care of Lin Yurou's preoccupation and know how Shengge Rinpoche is pretending to be a ghost, so I will report to Lin Yurou first, so that she should not worry and be afraid.

Who knew that he would go to the hotel during the day, saying that he was going to meet a film and television producer and was going to be recruited as the general manager of the company. In the afternoon, he said that he would go to Starbucks to meet people and sign an artist.

I wanted to go over, but she refused and asked me to wait at the hotel and let me know when she was done.

Inexplicably, a sense of foreboding came over me and made me uncomfortable.