The night wind blows people haggard, and their thoughts come and go. Pen ~ fun ~ pavilion www.biquge.info

Winter in Shanghai, it's cold, what early spring? It's still not much different from winter.

Stomping my feet next to the bus stop, I guess I'm going to have to stay here tonight.

The lights of the building not far away are dim, and it has nothing to do with me. I wanted to go to the under-built building to find a way, but after thinking about it, I found that they would definitely out when I found out that I had no money, and today I was unlucky enough that I didn't want to make a fool of myself again.

Let's hope a miracle happens, it's cold enough here, and the cold hasn't healed yet, God won't torture me like this, right?!

There are fewer and fewer people coming out of the building before the building, it should be very late, and the mobile phone has no battery.

Look up, there are no stars and no moon in the sky.

On such a cold and strange night, I was praying for the appearance of the knight, and I wrote so many beautiful stories of knights saving the princess, and there should be a knight who appeared to save me from being shipwrecked.

When I think about it, the odds are slim to none, and the reason for that is simply because I'm not a princess.

Plunged into boundless despair again, do you really want to spend tonight?!

Looking back at the building, it can't be my hope after all.

That's it, walk back on your legs, you must no longer lose faith in Mengmeng, before leaving, I promised to accompany her to go shopping tomorrow, and I don't want to stay in this strange place, the stranger the place, the more insecure.

Walking back, I should not get lost without turning towards the main road, I blame myself for falling asleep on the bus when I came, not only lost my wallet and haven't remembered the way back, who made me a road idiot by nature.

Such a deep night, Zheng Xiaoyang, where are you? What are you doing? With whom? Is it Sophie Fei or Zhongli?

But I heard Zhongli say that she and Zheng Xiaoyang were childhood sweethearts, if this is the case, then Zheng Xiaoyang should also be rich! People say that things gather like and people are grouped, but Zheng Xiaoyang's previous economic conditions were similar to mine. By the way, didn't he leave in the end? Oh, I should have gone back to my own house, seeing that Zheng Xiaoyang is dressed much better now than before, he should be staying in the house where he has money now.

Zheng Xiaoyang, we are destined not to be together with such a big gap, right?!

Is it, Zheng Xiaoyang?!

I know that the reality is so cruel, but I still miss Zheng Xiaoyang.

Zheng Xiaoyang, you must be asleep now.

But, dear......

With his legs raised, his heart was confused, and he was still indulging in the dream of missing Zheng Xiaoyang, there were too many things to tell Zheng Xiaoyang, but Zheng Xiaoyang, we never had the chance to meet again, right?

The night is dim, the street lights are faint, and I walk forward with my head down.

What's standing in my way? What is it, what exactly?

I didn't look up, but I saw an object move to my left side, and its body was black. However, I felt that there was no threat to my life, so I leaned to the right, lowered my head and continued walking.

After a few steps, the black object stood in front of me. I frowned, thinking to myself what kind of boring guy. Leaned to the right again, trying to get around this strange obstacle and leave, I was unlucky enough today, I wanted to get angry but didn't get angry, I met a strange person in this strange place, I was angry again, no matter how willful, in case he didn't threaten my life and finally caused some threat to my life, then wouldn't I be stupid.

But how come I don't feel any danger to my life at all? It even feels a little familiar. Wait, do I feel wrong, but I've always followed my feelings, and I feel that I can't go wrong, but why......

Very familiar feeling......

I stood to the right of the man and didn't move, he parked the motorcycle in front of me. I still didn't look up, but I saw a black motorcycle with the man's black shoes, black pants, and the hem of a black trench coat.

There's something wrong with this man, is there? I don't have this person in my memory, he can't really come to trouble me, right? But I don't think he has any sense of danger to my life.

I want to walk, but I can't move my legs.

I bowed my head and was silent, what did I say? What can I say to this man?!

Yell at him and tell him to get out of the way, or politely ask him to get out of the way?

But why can't I say a word, what's wrong with me?

In such a dark and silent night, there were no people coming and going, and in the dim light, I lowered my head and did not speak, and the person opposite me did not speak.

It was as if time had stood still, and I wanted to fall down and never wake up again, but why......

"Yang Yang ......" The dry but soft voice pierced the bleak night sky and entered my quiet eardrums. All of a sudden, it pierced my heart.

The voice...... So familiar that he ......

I raised my head suddenly, just one glance, it was still that face, but from immature to mature, from pure white to black, what changed him?!

I couldn't say anything, and then I was silent.

After all, am I losing him, or is he losing me?

So what does it matter, it's just why he's here, and how did he meet me?!

"Bring your boyfriend to me for a while." I looked into his face and wondered how I could break the silence, what to say, I hadn't seen him for years.

His gaze stayed on the corner of his lips, and in the faint light, his smile was clearly mocking.

Did he come here to see my jokes?!

Is that really the case? Xiao Jiang ......

I don't remember if I said anything to him, I just felt like my head was in chaos, my feet fluttered, and I ran away.....

I admit that I am not a particularly strong person in the face of feelings, but, Xiao Jiang, how should I face our past?

Without looking back, I kept running forward. The darkness ahead, there is not a little hope in sight, and even so, that darkness can at least contain my fragile past and hope.

The wind blows and ruffles my hair, and the short hair flies.

I wanted to cry, but I couldn't, my body trembled in the cold wind, and in the cold wind, there must be a bleak song.

I didn't dare to look back, I wanted to leave him with a strong memory, even if it was just a back.

Xiao Jiang, what can I do to face our past? So, let me choose to escape. Maybe God will never give you and me a second chance to meet again, as long as you are happy, then you will not live up to the not very long happy days we have together......

I don't think he caught up, so maybe it wasn't necessary anymore.

All I heard was the sound of the wind, my hair hitting my face, and no motorcycle. At the moment, I just want to hide in a no-man's corner and cry happily......

I don't remember how far I ran and how far I traveled. Leaning against a corner, his body went limp, his head rested on his knees, and finally, he cried loudly.

I don't know if it will disturb the residents here, but at the moment I just want to cry happily, this heaven and earth, just accommodate this moment of my willfulness.

Tears also soaked in the memories......

That year, he gave me the big red apple.

That day, in the park under the June sun, we sat on a stone bench and chatted.

It turns out that I have so many similarities with him, I like red, I hate those aunts who sow discord, and I am afraid of injections......

That day, he told me he liked me. I also said that I liked him, but he confessed to me first.

At that moment, I forgot that I had a Zheng Xiaoyang in my heart that I never forgot.

At that moment, I liked him, and I only had him in the world. His red t-shirt and his simple smile when he helped me......

Grab the people around you, it's better to live in a dream world that you weave.

He went to the shop and bought a bracelet, and there was a ring on it, and he took it off and put it on the middle finger of my left hand, which was just right, and I couldn't pull it out.

The bracelet is triangular in shape and is made up of lines. The lines are full of scattered stars, which reflect a beautiful brilliance in the sun.

He put the string of stars on the bracelet in the pocket of his T-shirt, and that pocket was in the place of his heart, did he put me in the place of his heart like this?

Although it is just a simple ornament, although it is just a small thing that is not valuable, but at least it is a commemoration of love, which is the testimony of my first true love!

Although I knew that at that time, he still had a girl named Yan hidden in his heart......

She was prettier than me, and she would often bring some friends to the store, and she would call a lot of wine, and then she would get drunk. There were almost all the undesirable boys and girls on the table, mostly boys, and then, when she was drunk, she threw up on the ground, and the boys started to ......

He liked her because she was more beautiful than me, and she had known him before I did.

I don't like that girl named Yan.

First, she is a girl in society, and she was only seventeen or eighteen years old when she mixed up with those bad teenagers; Second, she is the girl that Xiao Jiang likes, how could I possibly like her!!

We didn't announce our relationship in front of my aunt and them, and we silently made eye contact at work.

He'll still do things for me, but he'll do things for me if no one else is going to sneak my hand, and then I'll pout, and he'll laugh like a kid when he leaves.

My heart is as sweet as honey, and a girl in love will be controlled by her boyfriend with all her joys and sorrows.

He was a year younger than me, so I later wrote some novels about sibling love to commemorate my sibling love that was not the end but had long since ended.

At night, we held hands and went out to play, and he loved to touch my hair, when I was a girl with long hair.

In the trunk of a tree where no one is around, he will press me against the trunk and kiss me gently, and then he will breathe heavily......

At that time, I didn't understand the meaning of breathing like this, until later I gave my first time to a man I didn't love deeply, at least my feelings for that man were not as deep as my feelings for Xiao Jiang.

All these are all my regrets.

I didn't give him the best things, and although he asked for it, I didn't understand anything at the time. Neither the good students in the school, nor the sage Confucius teacher will teach their students how to fall in love.

So, everything was missed, all the good things that should have belonged to him and me.

......

In the moonlight, the shadow of us holding hands.

Under the sun, we are far apart.

Xiao Jiang, is it because of this reason that our love can't last long?!

Why are we getting farther and farther away?

But you know what? With you, I forgot that I still have a Zheng Xiaoyang in my heart. I don't know what love is, so I like you very much, but why did we end up parting?!

Summer nights can still be cold.

In those days, you didn't contact me, I think you forgot about me, or were you with that girl named Yan? I can't help but let myself be cranky, I can't let myself quiet down and work hard.

That summer night, from sunset until the sun and stars stuck out to look at this silent world, you kept talking to me on the phone, I don't remember what you said on the phone, the little phone was hot in my ears, a few hours, was there that long?

Later, you sang "That Night" to me, and it was my least favorite song. Then you cried and said that you had done something sorry for me and asked me to forgive you.

You've been crying, I'm crying, sitting on the big rock outside the alley, my body is cold.

I came out when I received your call, not even wearing a coat, and the arms outside the clothes shed lights and distant moonlight.

I'm holding my phone, listening to your voice and crying...... Here, I'm crying too.

Passers-by looked at me with all kinds of looks, and I thought they must have thought I was a psychopath.

Yes, I was completely nervous from the moment I was with you.

You're drunk, you're drunk, you don't want me to go to you, you're afraid you'll do stupid things to me, but now when I hear you crying, how I want to be by your side.

Although I hate you when you're drunk.

Drinking is all mantra, right? Xiao Jiang.

You didn't tell me where you were after all, have you forgotten that I am your first love? Am I your first girl?! It's the beautiful girl named Yan who is the first girl in your heart, right?!

Chaotic world, chaotic thinking.

I always remember this place, because I later learned that this phone call was the beginning of the demise of my relationship with you.

You disappeared and went to work in another store, although it was not far away, but I no longer had the courage to look for you, you abandoned me, I should be a very poor girl!

You're my first love!!

Later, it was a long time gone...... Later, the relationship faded.

I didn't even say anything about breaking up, and then I found out that the ring you wore on my finger that I couldn't pull out was gone.

I know we're going to break.

Isn't it? It's mine? My dear?

My aunt called me to go to Shanghai to develop, in fact, I didn't want to leave, but you have abandoned me, and my first love ended inexplicably.

What else do I have to be nostalgic for, what qualifications do I have to stay with you, you abandoned me, didn't you?

So, goodbye!

Goodbye, my first love; Goodbye, you I used to like; Goodbye, all the good things you have given me......

Goodbye, Sichuan.

I quit my job, straighten my long hair, put on my high-heeled boots, and appear in front of you.

You call me a leprechaun, you laugh.

I couldn't laugh anymore.

On the last night, you didn't send me home like you used to, are you telling me not to struggle anymore? Or tell me clearly that you are going to break up now, and tell me that you have abandoned me, so cruel, so real......

I walked back alone, turned the corner, and cried.

After crying, I dared to go home.

The night before parting, I finally waited for you. From two or three o'clock in the afternoon until you get off work, and then until ninety o'clock when you are willing to come and see me......

You're still the same as before, just don't smile at me anymore, your eyes are full of hatred, why do you hate me? Am I betraying our simple feelings? Or did I say something that hurt you...... I can't know.

I don't know what was said, you have to go, you have to go.

You hate me, I take your hand and then want to kiss you. You're so tall, you're with your lips closed, my lips touch the coldness of the corners of your lips, and you push me away...... I didn't cry, I just looked at you, looked at you all the time, was it hatred, revenge, or despair?

No, no, I just want to stay with you, how can I give up my first love. However, you didn't say anything to let me stay, even if it was a loving look, but you still pushed me away after all, without hesitation, don't you have a trace of attachment to me?!

You're leaving, and I can't keep you anymore.

That's it, I'll go, I hope I never come back, never want to see you again!!

Let's go, let's go away! Then you'll be happy, right?

I looked into your eyes one last time before leaving Sichuan for Shanghai, and said in an almost pleading tone, "Tell me you must be happy, okay?" Holding your hand for the last time, you want to leave so much, can't I even want to get the blessing of parting?

Can't you even make such a small request? A small wish.

Hold your hand and don't let go.

You turned around, stared at me with wide eyes and hatred, opened your mouth helplessly, and said word by word: "You...... One...... Decide...... Want...... Happiness. ”

I couldn't say anything anymore, I couldn't say anything, I opened my mouth, did I tell you that you must be happy I forgot, I only saw you shake off my hand hard, very annoying, turned around, and gradually disappeared from my sight.

I think you're going to disappear into my world eventually. How long will it take me to forget you?

I left, I didn't cry, the phone hung on my fingers, listening to the song "You Must Be Happy", why didn't I come to grab the phone, why can't I even cry if I want to cry?

I thought of him in the dead of night, the flowers I sent, and I also said some heart-rending love words, and gambled on a happy bargaining chip.

I think of him on the crowded streets, how is he now, but I can't give you the answer you want, but you must be happy.

To Shanghai, quiet, live, go to work, get off work......

After a long time, you called and said you wanted me back, as long as I went back, you could do whatever you wanted.

I didn't agree, do I want you to hurt me again, abandon me again, and cry because of you again?!

No, no...... Absolutely not!!

"You won't be happy in Shanghai!!" A familiar tone, a hateful tone, and then, you hang up.

Where did you get my phone number?

Are you here to hurt me again?

Are you popping up right now to see my jokes?

Xiao Jiang, how can you be so cruel?!

Are you still the same person I know?

At this moment, what can I do but cry silently?

Heavens, isn't it enough for you to hurt me?

I can only live in the beautiful dream with Zheng Xiaoyang that I have woven for myself.

It must be so......

That's it, that's it......