For example, for example, that year was also more serious, and casually said: "The bright moonlight in front of the window." Pen ~ Fun ~ Pavilion www.biquge.info"

"Tell me what's next?" The classmate urged.

"Your mother stripped naked" was a year of hard thinking, and finally squeezed out another sentence.

"Haha" Several classmates laughed and leaned back, and urged: "Hurry up, hurry up." ”

Nian pondered for a moment and continued: "Your father is a thief. ”

Under the laughter and urging of several classmates, he added loudly that year, "Eat your mother's slap." ”

"The moonlight in front of the window, your mother stripped naked. Your dad steals the eyes and eats your mom's slap. A few classmates chewed a few times, laughed, and unconsciously became interested, and one of them suggested: "We might as well sing a few songs." ”

"Yes, yes." I heard a person chanting: "Good rain knows the season, when spring happens, sneak into the night with the wind, moisturizing things silently." ”

"Good poetry, good poetry." Seeing that someone appreciated it, the classmate seemed to be more energetic, and when he looked at the beautiful scenery in front of him, he blurted out unconsciously: "My fair lady, a gentleman is also good." ”

After the two sentences were finished, they stood there unconsciously and without saying anything, and several classmates also thought hard for a long time and couldn't pick them up, when one of them shouted loudly: "Nian, make up two sentences quickly." I heard that year casually chanting: "After you ask for it, rub your hands quickly." ”

"Bastard!" A scolding came, not only the classmates were immediately silent, but Nian also felt that his soul was scattered, because this voice was the voice of the old master Kong, Nian raised his eyes and looked, and saw that the old master Kong had changed his previous appearance, his hands were crossed on his waist, his face was red, and his eyes were angry: "Food, sex, fair lady, gentleman, what a good sentence, you have been ruined by your life, tomorrow morning, you first go to the blackboard in the classroom to write a public inspection, the writing is good, the writing is not good, I will immediately expel you from the teacher." After saying that, he left in a rage.

There's no way, write it, isn't it just an inspection, if I don't even have this bit of writing, I still come out to be a ghost, yes, I have to make a draft first, and I will do it in one go until tomorrow morning, so that you can see that the old master Confucius has not accepted my year in vain, I will praise your old master to the sky, and see how you expel me from the school.

As he said, he tossed and turned in bed that year, meditated hard until he was satisfied, immediately got up, ran to the classroom, lit the torch, found half a piece of chalk, brushed a little bit, the dragon flew and the phoenix danced, and it was done with a wave.

"Okay, let's go back to sleep." was in a daze, he saw someone wake him up, Nian rubbed his eyes, saw that it was a classmate in the same dormitory, and hurriedly asked what was the matter, the classmate said: "Oh no, the teacher is furious about the inspection you wrote." ”

"No, in addition to good words, my inspection is still good words, it is simply holding the teacher up to the sky, how can he be angry?"

In fact, the nature of that year is not bad, and it is indeed a little smart, seeing that the teacher Confucius changed the image of a humble gentleman in the past, the year felt that the old master Confucius must have encountered something unhappy recently, since the teacher is not in a good mood, then, I will find a way to coax you to tease you, make you happy and smile, and the matter can be sent away.

Therefore, this inspection of the year is conceived to say more flattering words, to pat the old master Confucius's ass, because the year knows that for people, nothing is effective, it can be said that the inspection of the year is still full of level, but because there are a few typos in it, the meaning seems to be a little different. In order to give readers a closer look, I will now transcribe the original text of this inspection from that year as follows:

examine

Yesterday, I was having fun with a few classmates in the suburbs, and somehow the teacher came out and made a fuss about my behavior, yelled and became angry, and ordered me to write an examination.

If one of my readers and friends is a teacher, and assuming that you are the Confucius, I don't know how I will feel at the beginning of this examination of the year, not to mention how much difference there is between this lewd corpse and the poetry of the other in terms of actual behavior, even in that tone, Confucius only felt that the sky was dark, and Venus was in front of him, but it seemed to be a black mess.

Fortunately, if it weren't for the fact that there was a podium in front of him to hold him with both hands, then Old Master Kong would have been ready to sit on the ground.

After some time, the old master finally came back to his senses, and forced himself to hold on and see how this guy came to check this test.

As the saying goes, three years old looks big and seven years old looks old, think what kind of person our teacher is, how can he make a big deal about some trivial things, so I will tell the students a story when the teacher was a child.

It is said that Confucius was young and courteous, and one autumn, dark clouds rolled, cold winds swished, and fallen leaves fell from the trees and flew with the wind. At this time, the young Kong Qiu was concentrating on reading under the window, and because the weather was too cold, he was wearing thin clothes and rubbing his hands from time to time. The mother sitting on the side said bitterly, "Child. Take a break! ”

"Okay!" Confucius agreed, stood up, picked up the beans (the utensils used for the salute at that time) placed on the table, and went out of the house without a sound.

The mother hurriedly said, "Child, it's windy outside, it's so cold, and it's about to rain, so don't go to the yard to play." ”

Confucius replied with a straight face: "No, Mother, I am sacrificing to the gods and making a great gift!" ”

"What are you doing with your big salute?" Mother asked him. “

If I don't learn etiquette now, I won't know how to be a person when I grow up. ”

When my mother heard Confucius's words, she was speechless in astonishment. In an era of bad manners, the teacher's behavior is indeed extraordinary, in fact, our teacher is still a person who often has a lot of unique opinions, and I will tell the students two small stories that happened to the teacher recently.

There is a rule in the state of Lu that anyone who travels abroad and sees a Lu person being sold as a slave in a foreign country can spend money to redeem him, and after returning to the country of Lu, he will go to the treasury to report the account, and the treasury will pay it.

Confucius had a student who really saw a Lu man being sold into slavery abroad, so he ransomed him. After the redemption, he did not go to the treasury to repay the account, and others said that this man was of noble character. When Confucius found out, he scolded the student, saying that the student had done something wrong.

Isn't it a good thing that others are strange and do good deeds, and then redeem people and do not pay the bills? Isn't it of high character? Confucius said that we should not look at the problem in this way, and his practice actually prevented more slaves from being redeemed from the Lu people. After this person came back, he did not go to report the account, and in the future, when others saw the slave Lu people, they wanted to redeem him, and thought, after I redeemed it, if I go to report the account, others will discuss: In the past, someone did not report the account, and you went to report the account, and your character was not as good as his. In this way, the person may pretend not to see and not to redeem the person. Therefore, this practice prevents more slaves from being ransomed and bought, which is harmful.

There is also a story: a man fell into the water, and one of Confucius's students jumped into the water and rescued the person, and the family thanked him and gave him a cow, and he took it. Others are talking about it: Do you need money to go into the water to save people? Confucius found out and praised the student, saying that the student had done the right thing, which would have saved more people who had fallen into the water. Because after saving someone, they can collect money when they give them, so if someone falls into the water, some people are willing to save them. So it depends on the objective effect.

And our teacher is also a good example in terms of learning, let me tell you another story of Confucius's learning:

Confucius was very humble in his studies, and he was particularly hardworking. Once, Confucius learned the drum and piano with his teacher Xiangzi. The title of the song is "Wen Wang Cao". Confucius practiced hard for many days, and his teacher Xiangzi said, "It's okay."

Confucius said, "I have mastered how to play this tune, but I have not mastered it."

After practicing for many days, Shi Xiangzi said again, "It's okay, you have already got it"

However, Confucius still said, "No, you have not achieved your will."

After a considerable amount of time, Shi Xiangzi thought that this time it was really okay, but Confucius still thought that he had not played the piece well, so he repeatedly studied and experienced the connotation of the qin song until he saw the image of King Wen expressed in the music, and then he stopped.

His spirit deeply touched Shi Xiangzi, and until now, Confucius's famous saying "never tire of learning, never tire of teaching" is still our motto. Now our teacher is repairing "Poems" and "Books", ordering "Rites" and "Music", prefacing "Zhou Yi", and writing "Spring and Autumn". It can be seen that our teacher can be called not only a great thinker and educator, but also a writer, a theoretical politician, a social activist, a collator of ancient documents, and the true founder of Confucianism.

Seeing this, the old master Kong swept away the anger on his face, and couldn't help but feel that his nose was sour, his eyes were red, and he was almost about to burst into tears, so he wiped it with his sleeve casually, and couldn't help but look down.

Students, therefore, I suggest that we should all collect and sort out the words and deeds of the teacher in the past, and record it in the future, and compile it into a book, let's call it the "Analects", so that our teachers can not only lead the coquettish and obscene fashion trends now, but also pass them on through the ages. The disciple deducted thanks, and bowed to the mouth.