Gaze shifts, apricots between flowers. Pen | fun | pavilion www. ｂｉｑｕｇｅ。 ｉｎｆｏ

What am I doing?

Obviously looking forward to it, obviously waiting......

But it ......

How will he react?

Will he be worried? Do you wonder if something is wrong with me?

Or will you be angry?

- I missed my appointment.

Once again, I betrayed the trust he placed in me.

Maybe he'll just stop paying attention to me!

Why?

- Now I feel like even that doesn't matter.

Is it that you don't like him anymore?

Or do you like it too deeply, too long, and you're tired?

Either way, my figure had disappeared from his sight forever; Overlapped, forcibly draped in the apparition of the woman.

- I'm no longer myself.

I made up my mind, but I stopped at the moment......

Me, I, I......

I'm scared! I was afraid to see the gentle look in his eyes that treated me like someone else; I was afraid that he would always smile at me that was not mine; I was afraid that I would lose myself like that.

Because, it's so warm!

But at the same time, it's too painful.

I shouldn't be remembered!

Now that I think about it, the reason why he didn't know me when we first met was because he had already made a decision at that time.

He's already chosen—to start over.

Never know, never understand, start over before there is a cause and a relationship.

So he forgot about me, and at the same time forgot about Yakumo-senpai...... Why didn't I notice it at that time?

Curled up on the bed, under the thick quilt, I involuntarily reached out to my chest. There was a cherry blossom pendant that didn't belong to me, soaked in blood and cold to the touch.

It was his possession, but it came into my hands at some point. I can't remember, and I don't dare ask, so that's how it is.

In fact, I realized, I don't know when or where, and I don't know why—I lost some of my memories.

The truth is probably hidden in that lost memory!

"Ding Dong~"

While I was thinking, the doorbell rang.

Although in his current state, he didn't want to answer the door, but he still had no choice but to get up and get dressed quickly.

"Ding Dong~"

"It's coming, it's coming!"

Rather than the people waiting outside the door, I felt impatient at first, and simply shouted rudely.

"You're slow, Apricot!"

The moment I opened the door, the first time I saw the person standing behind the door, when I opened my mouth and was about to speak, I heard a very willful complaint.

"Why ...... You"

"I'm here to pick you up, sort it out, let's go! Everyone is still waiting! ”

"No, why would you ......"

"Hurry up! While you're grinding, time is ticking! Willfulness should also be done in moderation, that person is not going to settle for the character of others, and ...... Haven't you already made up your mind? ”

Then, no matter how painful it is, no matter how unbearable it is, you must keep trying. The way back has been cut off, and the only way left is forward. ”

"There's no time left for hesitation!"

"If you don't hurry up, you're going to be really hated by (that person)!"

"Wait a minute!"

"Bang!"

I rushed back to my boudoir and sat down at my dressing table and dressed myself seriously and quickly. For some reason, after listening to her words, my heart was suddenly filled with warmth, and a fire was stirring in my chest.

Today, I'm going to dress myself up and show my best side in front of that person's eyes, so that one day, ......

"Long wait......"

When I opened the door again, she was gone!

But even so, I didn't hesitate to walk to the man's house as fast as I could, almost in a straight line.

"Thank you so much, senior sister!"

"Really, that's why you're thought to be me by that person!"

I bowed deeply in the direction I sensed, and the moment I looked up, I seemed to hear her sigh with mixed joy. I don't know if she can see it or not, but in response, I smiled brightly: "Even then, I'll gladly accept it!"

Gaze shifts, Yakumo frost maple (Arashika).

"Looks like that kid doesn't matter anymore! Then that's all that's left for Makoto! But...... How can I tell him? Time is running out, just wait! I hope it's still too late......"

The girl walked slowly alone on the no-man's land, the cold wind blowing through her bun wantonly, picking up strands of loose hair, revealing her face as white as snow.

The girl did not cry, did not feel sad, did not hesitate, did not regret.

It's a pity, but it's a pity!

It's sad, but it's warm!

All that remains is to watch quietly and wait quietly......

That's fate, that's marriage!

People who are together often do not love each other, and people who love each other often cannot be together......

The sky makes people!

Not child's play, not a joke, but a fact.

"If I told you now that I still love you, would you still believe it unreservedly? Honest.. “

Looking at the potato chips in the oil pan and listening to the laughter coming from time to time outside the kitchen, I couldn't help but smile with satisfaction.

- Together.

- Happiness can be achieved for all.

This is my wish.

Gentle I don't want to hurt others, and I sacrifice myself for this; Ruthless, I wanted to hurt others, and for that he froze his heart.

Contradiction! But they coexist at the same time!

I longed for someone!

Because if you are alone, you will not hurt others.

- I know.

This is a selfish and crazy wish!

I longed for true death!

Because I can no longer find a reason to continue living, and I don't think I need to continue to exist!

Boring rules, boring traditions, do not change every day...... to be constrained, to be restricted; False smiles, empty words, cold "home" that can't feel the temperature...... Left out in the cold, abandoned.

In the darkness of the night, what I felt was:

Lonely! Lonesome! Chilly!

Gradually, I got used to a person, I gradually liked someone, and gradually and unconsciously ignored the gaze of others.

I live in my own world, I only think about myself, I only do what I want to do, I only say what I want to say......

Lonely?

- There is darkness with me.

Lonesome?

- Tell yourself about it.

Chilly?

- Getting used to it turns into enjoyment.

I smiled, a bleak smile. Tears fell unconsciously, dripping into the oil pan, and the pot suddenly fluttered.

"Huh? Why? ”

I wiped the liquid from the corners of my eyes and felt the wetness in my hands, I didn't know why.

In order to adjust my emotions, I habitually closed my eyes.

"Blank ......"

"Huh?"

For a moment, I heard a very familiar voice.

"Blank ......"

Not again! The voice echoed in my ears, faintly, as if it were nothing. All of a sudden, I felt so uncomfortable, so uncomfortable! The whole body can't stop suppressing something, it's grievance, something is oppressing me.

It's heavy! I felt like my face was all white. I had difficulty breathing, and my whole body was cold, as if I was in an ice cellar, as if I was frozen.

"Why?"

"Blank line~"

The voice came again. It seems to be right in my ears, but it feels very far away, far and near.

"Blank line!"

"Who is it?"

"Blank ......"

"Smack!"

The owner of the voice wept, and I felt my face suddenly cold and moist, as if the tears had fallen on my face. But it can't be......

I reached out and touched my face, and I wanted to confirm that it wasn't true. And then I proved it! There were no water stains on the fingers in front of me, but the cold and wet feeling was real, and it was not an illusion.

Because I'm feeling it! Every minute, every second, every moment!

But...... If that's the case, then what's going on?

"Hurry up and ......"

"Who is the owner of the voice? Why do I suddenly feel like she's calling me? ”

"Wake up, ......"

"Who am I?"

"Makoto Ito!"

"-No."

In the deep mountains and old forests, at the moment of crisis when Mo Kongxing was on the verge of death and his life was dying, a delicate girl rescued him.

I don't know if it's because the sky has no eyes, or if God blesses it. After 12 hours of emergency rescue, Mo Kongxing, who was bent on seeking death, finally failed to achieve his long-cherished wish. After walking around the Hades Palace, he came back alone.

It's just that the man has returned, but the heart is dead!

- Mo Kongxing has become a vegetative person, and he has been lying on the hospital bed for half a year now.

A few hours ago, Mo Kongxing, who was already in a vegetative state, suddenly had a physical reaction, and it seemed that he was showing signs of awakening. And the doctor who learned the news later learned from Gu Lanxin - at that time, Gu Lanxin was shouting in her heart for Mo Kongxing.

So he suggested that Gu Lanxin continue to do what she had done at that time - shouting in her heart that Mo Kongxing was not empty.

Then, Makoto heard the voice!

This leaves Makoto speechless and nowhere to vent. He really doesn't want to wake up!

But he saw it!

Looking at the oil pot, a young girl was revealed in a daze. She lay on her stomach at the head of the bed, holding the right hand of a teenager lying on a hospital bed. Nervously and excitedly, she whispered again and again - "empty line".

For teenage girls, it's hope!

And for Makoto, this is despair!

Makoto Ito's sight.

Why?

Why is this the case?

Why exactly?

Is it funny to play tricks on me and see my unwilling expression of pain?

Damn, why is this so? What's just me?

"Didn't you say that? What a pathetic and pathetic man! ”

A voice that was both familiar and unfamiliar echoed in my ears was the hot spring man I "met" when I was unconscious in the foggy mountains.

No, that's me, the real me!

"Even in dreams, at least in my dreams, I hope they can all be happy!"

"Haha, what an interesting speech!"

"This is the dream, and it's your dream, and you're the only god here! So, God, have you given them the happiness you want? ”

"Shut up!"

I covered my ears and roared inwardly!

"Then again, what exactly do they want to be happy? With Makoto Ito, who are you with now? Makoto Ito is only one, and it is impossible to be 'together' with everyone, and what has created this concept is this society that has become deformed and inexplicable traditional morality. ”

"Although I understand, although I understand, I am powerless to change! Because I don't want to impose my ideas on others, I have to avoid the system for this. ”

"If you like everyone at the same time, and let everyone like you at the same time, the next choice is to immigrate or not get married......"

"The plan didn't work out because it had a fatal flaw – you imposed your own ideas on Makoto Ito."

"I obviously don't like them, but I just make them like you......"

"You ......"

"Long-winded, shut up for me!"

Finally, I couldn't hold back my yelling anymore.

"Well, you just cherish it! Now you know that time is running out, and it won't be long before you wake up! ”

The hot spring man's voice was far away, but there was a noise outside the kitchen. Before the crowd came in, I shouted, "No one will come in!"

It's just that I feel uncomfortable, but I don't want to wake up from my dreams.

He buried his face deeply, and he hung his head heavily. Just for a moment, just for a moment......

Everything is understood......

The truth of that "nightmare", the fact that has been reversed and mistaken – that is not a dream, but a real reality.

- It was him, who was in a dream, but did not know the dream.

It was the heavens that were playing tricks on him, it was fate that was laughing at him, it was he who betrayed him!

- I should be alone.

- I should be the only one.

He thought subconsciously.

But......

Outside the veiled kitchen, there was no longer a soft laugh; Because of me, they don't smile anymore, but they still look forward to it. They are waiting for someone to arrive!

- Makoto Ito!

That's me!

In order to live up to their hearts and make up his mind, Makoto wiped away his tears, put on a smile, and took firm steps.