Chapter 24: Wandering

Maybe it's because of being at home, my mother has a good appetite, she ate a lot at noon, and she slept beautifully in the afternoon, and when she got up again, she looked in a good mental state, and there was no trace of illness and hospitalization, which made Zhao Xiaocui very relieved. Pen Fun Pavilion www.biquge.info and she also happened to take advantage of the two-day holiday to relax, every time she stayed at home, Zhao Xiaocui was the most relaxed and there was no pressure at all, so she had to take this opportunity to enjoy this feeling.

When I went to the hospital on Friday morning to cooperate with the ward round, the doctor said that the recovery was good, and he could be discharged from the hospital next Monday, and he could take medicine at home on the weekend to observe it, so he didn't use the hospital, Zhao Xiaocui and her mother were happy, because they were going to be discharged on Monday, Zhao Xiaocui decided to take another day off on Monday to arrange things at home and go back.

In the two days she stayed at home, in addition to accompanying her mother to the hospital, Zhao Xiaocui spent the rest of her time either accompanying her mother and aunt to visit shopping malls and supermarkets or turning around the vegetable market, living a leisurely life; The second uncle in the family heard that their mother was okay and was about to be discharged from the hospital, and they were all clamoring for a dinner, especially this time the aunt and Zhao Xiaocui were there, and the family was all over, so at noon on Saturday, a big family came to the restaurant to eat and get together and chatted for most of the afternoon, Zhao Xiaocui also hadn't participated in a family dinner for a long time, she looked around at everyone, with a smile on her face, this kind of smile is an undisguised smile from the heart, without a trace of pretentiousness and unhappiness, looking at the relatives around her, she suddenly thought of the days when she drifted north, Although a person is free outside, no one cares, but all things are carried by himself, not because he doesn't want to tell his family, but because he doesn't want his family to worry about it, and sometimes it's useless to say it, every time he goes home and gathers with everyone, he also talks about his glamorous side, and the pressure and the bitterness behind it can't be put on the table, so Zhao Xiaocui also had a kind of resistance to family gatherings before, or just to deal with it on face. But this time because her mother was sick when she came home and got together with everyone again, she felt a kind of family warmth and mutual happiness, I don't know if her heart is calm or everyone has really changed, Zhao Xiaocui enjoys the satisfaction and happiness from the heart at this moment, in a trance she doesn't want to go back to Beijing, she doesn't want to go back to the room she shares with others, she doesn't want to go back to do the work that she doesn't know where the future is, this moment is meaningless or even futile, pessimistic and frustrating for her, She just leaned on the backrest, holding a water cup in her hand, taking a sip from time to time, watching and listening to everyone chatting, although the content is very trivial and homely, but this is life~~~ In the past, I always wanted to work hard to get ahead, but I have also encountered a lot of nails for so many years, and I am basically at the starting point, what kind of future do I want? What does it take to stand out? Get dressed, buy a bag, and look good? This is too empty, and now everyone's conditions are good, every time I come back to reunite with friends and classmates, everyone has good clothes and bags and dresses up beautifully, so what else is there besides these? Future, vision? But in the five years that I have been outside, my vision may have improved, but it is limited to bragging with others, what kind of future do I want, in fact, Zhao Xiaocui herself doesn't know, her original idea of staying in Beijing is very simple, that is, she wants to live the life she wants to live, not to be bound by her family, but now her life doesn't seem to be what she thinks, there are too many things that go against her will, just like the company was disbanded before, she was in a low mood, but she could only endure it herself, and she couldn't say it! Just when she drifted north for five years and didn't even have a boyfriend, her parents no longer waited for her to grow old, although she still walked step by step, but her back began to hunch, especially her hair turned white almost overnight, and most of her had to rely on hair dye to make herself look young, and she was often uncomfortable here and there from time to time, and in order not to worry her, she almost never spoke, if it weren't for her clever running back this time, she was still kept in the dark.

'What the hell am I trying to do in Beijing?' Zhao Xiaocui asked herself from her heart for the first time, and she had asked herself when she was frustrated and lost before, but she always believed that bread would have milk, but after seeing her parents this time, she suddenly wavered, yes, what is it? She has been holding the water cup and thinking about her own thoughts, watching a large family chatting, as if she has gradually become an outsider, time is so terrible, it can make everyone's distance get farther and farther, although the family also knows in their hearts that it is not easy for her to work hard outside, but no one has ever said that she is not easy, she is encouraging her, every time my uncle says, 'My Xiaocui will definitely be able to get ahead, and you will have to set a big table then.'" How harsh these words were when they were poured into Zhao Xiaocui's ears before, but now? Looking back, this can be regarded as an encouragement from my uncle, I was too careful, looking at my uncle Zhao Xiaocui, whose face was swollen and red, suddenly found that he was also old, and the white hair on his sideburns ran out mercilessly, which was in stark contrast to the black hair on his head, which was even more dazzling.

After dinner that day, Zhao Xiaocui had an open chat with her parents for the first time, and she asked her parents directly: "What hope do you have for me?" ”

"We? Wish? There is no hope, we just want you to have a good life and not have too much pressure. Dad said, and Mom nodded in agreement.

"Do you want me to come back or in Beijing?" Zhao Xiaocui asked again.

"This is up to you, now young people have their own ideas, people grow up to live according to their own will, after all, everyone has their own living thoughts, besides, now the traffic is so developed, if we miss you, we can get to you soon, and you can come back soon." Dad continued, and Mom nodded.

Zhao Xiaocui didn't answer again, the family fell into silence, and suddenly Dad continued: "If you want to come back, it's okay, no matter where you are, we will support you." "Yes, we all support you, but you should also think about personal problems, after all, you are getting older, and girls are too old to find." Mom said.

"Well, I see, don't worry, I'll pay more attention to my side."

"Anyway, you don't have to worry about the affairs of the family, if you need our help, just ask, although your parents don't have much ability, they still have a little ability to help you." Dad added.

Zhao Xiaocui nodded silently and didn't speak or ask any more questions, she helped her parents back to the bedroom to rest, while she leaned back on the sofa in a daze, yes, she wavered, but she didn't know what she could do when she came back, so she had to bury her head between her knees and remain silent.