Since Ye Shaoweng's seven-character quatrain "It's Not Worth Visiting the Garden" was spoofed by netizens into a wild sentence, "a branch of red apricot comes out of the wall" became popular, our Confucian saint Kong Qiu could not escape the poison. Pen × fun × Pavilion www. ｂｉｑｕｇｅ。 ｉｎｆｏ

A good sentence expressing friendship "There are friends from afar, and they are happy" was changed to "There are friends from afar, can you still eat?" ”

There are friends who come to you from afar, of course, you have to invite you to dinner, this sentence is very real, and people who don't know will think that the latter sentence is the original sentence.

Xiao Qiao, who is dancing with a spatula in the kitchen, thinks that with his own face, he is in a quiet corner and blooms quietly, which makes people feel much calmer than those words that are not talented and hold back; It's much more solid than those overly talented and flashy words.

"Hehe, you kid is really blessed, these two girls are first-class beauties in any dynasty except the Tang Dynasty, and they were all met by you." Shi Qian said enviously.

"I can't see that you are still a cultural person, Brother Qian, do you still know how to expel the Tang Dynasty?" Xiao Qiao took some water from a scoop and poured it into the pot, and asked with a smile. He didn't expect that Shi Qian still understood this, the Tang Dynasty, with plumpness as the beauty to express the peaceful and prosperous atmosphere of that era.

"I wasn't born to steal, of course I did." Shi Qian said unhappily: "Don't underestimate people, if I don't have two clicks, how can I go to the enemy's barracks and steal the documents I need?" ”

"Yes, yes, I didn't say anything." Xiao Qiao responded and added the washed rice to the pot.

"Hey, seriously, do you need me and Hua Tuo to give you some sweat medicine? These two chicks are very stubborn, I'm afraid you won't be able to take it down without any means. "Feelings, they drugged women at that time.

Without waiting for Xiao Qiao to refuse, Xiang Yu kicked Shi Qian. Don't look at them as spirits, but Shi Qian is obviously not light on this blow, grinning and crying out in pain. Xiang Yu didn't care about him, Ruying's sharp eyes glanced at Xiao Qiao, and said, "Boy, I will never allow you to use this kind of indiscriminate means." Which woman you have in love can you chase, crooked way, go less. ”

"You don't need to be so serious, Brother Yu, I haven't said anything yet." Xiao Qiao was busy with the work in his hand in an orderly manner, and said with a smile: "The women in this world are much more beautiful, can I still drug whichever one I like, Brother Qian, your method is too unrealistic." Besides, it's all monogamy now, and I haven't done any of it yet, so how can I worry about other people. ”

Shi Qian hugged his legs and said slightly: "Did you say Lin Yuxin's girl?" But now they live in a room with two people, and it's not convenient for you to start, I think it's better to use my method, I ...... with Hua Tuo."

Before he finished speaking, the other leg was also made up by Hua Tuo: "You have a lot of ideas!" Who is going to make sweat medicine with you! ”

Shi Qian rubbed his hands on his legs with tears in his eyes, and said aggrievedly: "Am I not doing it for Xiao Qiao?" It doesn't matter what method he uses, wouldn't it be good to achieve the result? Anyway, Xiao Qiao will not be with Lin Yuxin in the end. ”

When the lid of the pot was opened, a burst of white smoke rose up. Xiao Qiao said firmly: "Since it belongs to me, I will rely on myself to get her." ”

Stuffing the boiled porridge in the pot, Xiao Qiao cut some pickles bought from the market, and waited for the dishes and chopsticks to be put on the table, and then greeted the pair of girlfriends who were watching TV with bath towels: "Miss, Miao'er, the meal is ready, don't watch TV yet, come and eat something." ”

The two girls turned around at the same time, and just after taking a bath, Lin Yuxin and Shan Miaoer's cheeks still had flushes similar to those of women after being emotional. As soon as she heard that there was something to eat, Shan Miaoer ran over without saying a word. To Xiao Qiao's surprise, she had faded the powder on her face, but the bone-chilling charm on her body had not diminished at all.

took the bowl of porridge that Xiao Qiao had just served, Shan Miao'er gently blew the rice grains on the side of the bowl, and put the spicy cabbage into her mouth. His eyes widened, and after chewing and swallowing slowly, he couldn't help but praise: "That's right, where did you learn this craft?" ”

"The children of poor families are in charge of the house early, and I am self-taught, so let's try it, Miao'er." Another bowl of porridge was served to himself and Lin Yuxin, and seeing that the latter was still not moving, Xiao Qiao couldn't help but exclaim again: "Miss, the body is the capital of the revolution, why are you angry with me if you are not full?" Come on, the porridge will be cold in a while. ”

"Why did you provoke Xin'er?" It didn't matter what Shan Miao'er said, her mouth was too full, and several rice grains squirted out directly as soon as she opened her mouth. But she didn't care at all, she smiled at the stunned Xiao Qiao, and reached out and pulled those rice grains in front of her.

Such Shan Miaoer is not pretentious at all, it is easy to get along with her, and she doesn't have to stretch herself all the time. Xiao Qiao smiled and said: "There is a person from country H who has to challenge me with taekwondo, so I casually agreed to him." When she came back and told the eldest lady, she was angry. ”

"Then she cares about you, don't look at Xin'er's arrogant appearance, in fact, she is a sullen ......" Shan Miao'er held two chopsticks and moved towards Xiao Qiao in the air, and suddenly saw Lin Yuxin's vicious gaze cast here, and immediately changed her words: "Actually, she is a knife-mouthed tofu heart, hehehe...... Hehe...... Heh......"

Lin Yuxin came to the table, stretched out her foot and kicked Xiao Qiao's calf, her eyes didn't look at him at all, and said directly: "Give Miss Ben a seat, I'll sit here today." ”

"Oh... Oh..."Xiao Qiao was stunned, realizing that the eldest lady was unhappy with herself, suppressed her smile, and moved her ass and bowl to sit on another chair. He can tell right from wrong, Lin Yuxin is just too worried about his safety, this alternative way of expressing feelings is also quite interesting.

"What are you talking about me?" Lin Yuxin lifted the stool forward and asked.

"Hehe, let's just say that the people from country H want to challenge me, Miao'er said that you are a knife mouth tofu heart, and you are so angry because you are worried about my safety." Xiao Qiao didn't hide it, and told Lin Yuxin. Not to mention, sit farther away, which is enough for pickles.

"Whew! Who's mad at you? Yes? Who's mad at you? Lin Yuxin was like an angry little tiger, and her pink fist hammered directly on Xiao Qiao's chest: "Return that person from country H, I'll give you a chance to reorganize the language, and re-embellish the sentence for me!" ”

If she hadn't been angry with Xiao Qiao, Shan Miao'er really couldn't find any other words to describe Lin Yuxin. That little face swelled like a pufferfish, I really want to try to prick Lin Yuxin with a needle, will she explode.

"Uh...... is a fourth-dan taekwondo black belt, the champion of the WTF competition in country H, the vice president of the Asian Taekwondo Enthusiasts Association, the first place in the Chinese Taekwondo Wushu Championship, and a bunch of people who I can't remember the awards, challenged me, and after I accepted it, the eldest lady got angry. ”

"I repeat, I'm not angry!" Lin Yuxin slapped the table, and said to Shan Miao'er: "It doesn't matter if you can't remember, I remember." The 2nd Taekwondo Exchange Tournament won the first place in the 50KG class of Group A competition, the "Wuhun Cup" Taekwondo Exchange won the individual all-around championship of the Pinshi Competition, the champion of the Taekwondo Star Cup Competitive Finals, and the first place in the 55KG class of the men's group of the Taekwondo Open Championship. Jin Shenghao's honors can be stoned to death if they are piled up, Miao'er, do you think this guy will only agree to other people's challenges if he is looking for death? ”

"Like...... It's a bit of a dead ......" Although she doesn't understand sports at all, as soon as she hears the key words of international, what cup, champion, and first, Shan Miao'er can imagine how powerful Xiao Qiao's opponent is. The reason why Xiao Qiao is said to be dead is because she didn't see anything from Xiao Qiao at all...... Ruthless.

"Did you hear what Miao'er said? You don't understand what anyone can understand, do you? Your wings are stiff, don't you, think you're invincible if you're stronger than before? Lin Yuxin greeted him again.

"Listen to me first." Xiao Qiao blocked Lin Yuxin's fist and held it in his hand to prevent her from moving: "Do you think I still swallow my anger like before and calm things down?" Listen to Jin Shenghao belittle our Huaxia martial arts, and let him look down on us Huaxia people? There are too many people looking at me, whether it is the principal of our school or my classmates, they all regard me as hope. I know Kim Sung-ho is powerful, better than everyone I've met before, but I can't run away from it. ”

"I want dignity."

Lin Yuxin's clenched hands finally let go, she could find ten thousand reasons to persuade Xiao Qiao not to fight, but Xiao Qiao only needed one reason to convince her. He said he wanted dignity, and that's it, that's enough. His words were just right, and the simmering made people's hearts warm.

Shan Miao'er's eyes moved left and right, staring at these two guys with eyebrows and flirtatious eyes, and made the judgment that these two guys were affectionate. The chopsticks bumped against the wall of the bowl, making a crisp sound, and Shan Miaoer said: "I said you two, when I am transparent?" Dry wood and fire, you are. ”

"Phew!" Lin Yuxin took a sip, and immediately let go of her hand as if she had thrown coals.

Xiao Qiao laughed twice: "Hehe, who dares to treat you as transparent, let's eat, Miao'er." ”

The ancients said: "There are only three things." ”

The ancients also said: "The Buddha can only endure three times." ”

Lin Yuxin counted Xiao Qiao, after such a while, this is the fourth time he has called Shan Miaoer "Miao'er". Wave after wave of unsettled, Xiao Qiao offended Lin Yuxin again without realizing it.

Women are cautious creatures, Lin Yuxin pretended not to know and asked, "You are very familiar with Miao'er?" ”

"I'm not familiar, this morning is the first time I've spoken officially, what's wrong?" Xiao Qiao pulled the chopsticks and said.

"Not really." Lin Yuxin said lightly, but muttered in her heart, "I don't know what your name is Miao'er, don't you still call me Miss in front of people when you are so familiar with yourself, why don't you call me Xin'er." Bastards, dumbass, bastards. ”

Fiddling with the chopsticks, Lin Yuxin said casually: "The meat is too old to taste." ”

"The yolk and egg whites of the preserved eggs are separated, and they have been boiled for a long time." Lin Yuxin said disgustedly.

Lin Yuxin frowned: "It's too salty, salty." ”

"Put too much water, porridge is thin." Lin Yuxin shook her head and sighed.

Shan Miao'er put down the dishes and chopsticks, burped without any image, looked at her best friend with a smile, and said, "Xin'er, shouldn't you be jealous because Xiao Qiao called me Miao'er?" ”