After answering about 20 questions, the barmate's questions gradually became abnormal. How is it abnormal?,The specific symptom table xiàn is a question that has no lower limit.、No discipline.,It's basically nothing to do with itself.,It's purely a witty question.。

Seeing the move, Wu Xie's answer was naturally very clever.

Bar friend "zookeeper" asked: Mr. Wu Xie, I am an animal keeper, usually with the poisonous snake of Mangshan soldering iron, I heard that you are a writer, can you make up a short story for me? A hundred words is enough.

Wu Xie quickly replied: One day, an animal administrator was fortunate to be bitten by the Mangshan soldering iron, but fortunately, the medical staff arrived at the scene in time, and the Mangshan soldering iron is temporarily out of danger.

"Haha, the Mangshan soldering iron head is temporarily out of danger of life...... How smelly your feet are. ”

"Hahaha, the story is concise and concise, less than 50 words, full of deep meaning and thought-provoking, I like it."

……

Bar friend "Eternal Spare Tire" asked: Teacher Wu Xie, the goddess I have a crush on sent a message saying: "As long as you dare to be my little train and never derail, I will promise to be your little mermaid and never split my legs", how should I reply.

Wu Xie replied: "The bullet train does not derail, but it is difficult to guarantee that it will not chase the tail, and it is difficult to ensure that the mermaid does not split its legs and does not use its mouth."

Bar friends were shocked! The reply team for occupying the building is neatly aligned

“……”

“……”

“……”

Bar friend "Three Hospitals Patient" asked: Teacher Wu Xie, I have a sore asshole recently, and I still have blood in my shit, do I have hemorrhoids?

Wu Xie replied: Landlord, are you going to pick up soap?

"Haha, that picture is too no, I can't imagine it!"

"Teacher Wu Xie, I didn't expect you to be such a person!"

"Haha, why is this patient offline, and was told by Teacher Wu Xie that he was in his heart?"

After half an hour of teasing with the bar friend, the naïve Wu Xie bar increased the number of fans by five hundred, looked at the time, and the lights were almost out, Wu Xie created a new post and replied.

"One day, a certain gentleman's wife gave birth to a child, he hurriedly ran to the hospital to visit, waited for n hours, there was a cry in the delivery room, he shouted happily, I am a father! At this time, the doctor came out with a sad face and told him that the child was born with a deformity. A certain gentleman stayed there, and he didn't understand the reason, and suddenly his wife's shout came from the delivery room: It's all your fault, you don't reply to the post all day long! ”

Wu Xie turned off the computer after going offline, but the naïve Wu Xie bar's bar friends still let him immerse himself in Wu Xie's last post.

The last post, too down-to-earth. Every heavy user of Tieba understands that this post has no substance at all, and it is completely Tieba style.

This is a water sticker, **naked, a water sticker without a bottom line.

I can't imagine that our poet, youth literature writer, and classical literary writer Wu Xie is such a person.

The next day, the sky was bright.

After Wu Xie finished washing, he opened Weibo and glanced at the private message, which was sent by Wu Xie's No. 1 fan.

"Wu Xie, the rules and regulations of the post bar have been formulated, and I have brought a friend on the Internet again, he is a network master, hacker, you know. All kinds of network technologies are not to be said. This is his Baidu post bar id: Jiuyou GG. ”

Open the mobile phone sticker, check the list of administrators, and sure enough, there is an administrator named "Jiuyou GG".

And the first pinned post is about the introduction of the management of the naïve Wu evil bar. In addition to Wu Xie No. 1 fans, his introduction is the most stylish, trendy and fashionable.

"I'm still the same stuffy, all kinds of sass; All kinds of pants, all kinds of demons; Despicable, obscene, shameless, known as the obscene little cheap Jiuyou GG. ”

Before the first class began, as soon as Wu Xie entered the classroom, he was greeted with enthusiastic applause from his classmates, standing solemnly, and having the illusion of being warmly welcomed by the masses who led the inspection work.

"Miracles are made by force."

"Miracles are a miracle. Wu Xie, yesterday you brought honor to our class and our department. ”

Wu Xie is embarrassed, grateful is grateful, and what he said about a miracle that scared people to death.

The welcome ceremony lasted for five minutes, the students offered flowers, took pictures, and finally pushed away all the boys, and the girls in the class took a photo of the life of the ancient emperor and the beauties of the harem with Wu Xie.

The boy in the audience is called envy, jealousy and hatred. But there is no way, who led our broadcasting department to achieve unprecedented good results in history and get rid of the hat of "weak sports".

After the welcome ceremony, Wu Xie ushered in the collective attack of the boys.

"Wu Xie, you kid is powerful. Yesterday not only achieved honor for our department, but also won glory for the school. You don't mean to be treated, no. I heard that the hospital is going to reward you with another 1,000 yuan. ”

"Yes, Wu Xie, I didn't expect you to be good at writing articles, and you also have a hand in sports. Director Tian has always been a good talker, and you must have a part in this friendship with the Foreign Chinese College. ”

"Hey, I can't imagine that I have been thinking about it for a long time, and Mu Chengcheng, which I have been unable to get for a long time, will be seen by you. Let's not talk about anything else, if it's a brother, I'll take a few photos of Mu Chengcheng. ”

"Cut, Wu Xie, my request is not as excessive as his. Help me keep an eye out for other beautiful girls in the Chinese Academy, here are my details and photos to see if they are interested. ”

Sweat!

Wu Xie's ears were about to be calloused.

The animals were clearly congratulating themselves, but in fact they were all uneasy and kind. Let's just say that the little thin man with two girlfriends is for the photos of Mu Qingcheng. Uh, by the way, his two girlfriends are left and right. and the little fat man who asked him to give the information to the friendship girls.

That information is too detailed.

180cm, 18cm, 180㎡, 180 times/min......

Hey, you short and chubby little fat man, you are too good at talking nonsense. If you are 1.8 meters, I am 2 meters.

After the morning class, Wu Xie took the bonus issued by the school, including 1,000 yuan from the sports meeting, and 1,000 yuan from Director Tian on behalf of the department, a total of 2,000 yuan, and led the whole class to a restaurant near the school to eat.

Of course, they went out through the "dog hole" of the school. Otherwise, if you are caught by the security guards, you will have to criticize and educate.

The meal lasted about an hour, although it was a restaurant near the school, and the price was very common, but there were dozens of people in the class, plus the gang saw that they couldn't enter the friendship list, and they turned their sadness into appetite. After a period of cooking, Wu Xie went out for 2,500 yuan.

Yes, the academy bonus is gone, and I still lose 500.

But Wu Xie is very happy, and now he doesn't care about money. He is not poor anymore, he now has 350,000 yuan in savings alone, and sends more than 2,000 remittances to his family every month, and he is also a small man in school.

The most important thing is that he knocked back all the money word by word, which is the crystallization of the fruits of his labor, and he uses it with peace of mind.

ps。 Ask for recommendations, ask for collections