Pen × fun × Pavilion www. ｂｉｑｕｇｅ。 In the days that followed, Vera Chen kept going in and out of the house, sometimes, dozens of times.

Parents are very worried and distressed when they see Chen Weiwei like this, and they will look at the scene in front of them like other people.

When they saw their daughter behaving abnormally, especially after being diagnosed with depression in the hospital, they had two very extreme thoughts in their hearts.

One is that Chen Weiwei's depression has worsened, and it is developing towards a serious point that is unpredictable as a parent.

The second is that Chen Weiwei's condition has been cured, or rather, it is simply a misdiagnosis by the hospital, not only better, but also changed the previous more homely sullen personality, and became lively and cheerful.

In the minds of Chen Weiwei's parents, it is such a simple and straightforward thought, for the depressed Chen Weiwei, either close to heaven or close to hell, of course, he {she} hopes that his daughter can fly into heaven to be a phoenix, but he doesn't want his injured daughter, in this crowded world, always in a self-contained loneliness, unable to brush up any sense of existence, and feel hesitant about the road to be taken every day.

Chen Weiwei didn't care too much about whether it was right or wrong for her busy performance of using her hands and feet, and she didn't take into account the feelings of her parents, but every time she came back from outside, she would always bring back a large bag and a small bag, and then go into her boudoir, just like disappearing, and the door was locked without sound.

Chen Weiwei's parents looked at their daughter like this, they were both happy and anxious in their hearts, he {her} couldn't help everything that happened in front of them, they just held the best thoughts and prepared for the worst, and they didn't know that Chen Weiwei would have bought a ticket to go abroad.

Such a seemingly crazy move lasted for a week, and in this week's time, the number of times Chen Weiwei went in and out of the house was about to catch up with the total number of times she stayed at home all year round.

The night before leaving the house, Chen Weiwei packed all the items that needed to be taken away in her suitcase, locked herself in the house as before, and ignored her parents in the living room, sending invitations or knocking on the door to greet her.

She put these boxes and bags quietly in the corner of the room, sitting alone on the bed, looking at everything familiar around her, as if she saw the scene of studying abroad and leaving the city, at that time there was not as it is now, feeling depressed and lonely, at that time, there was the warm company of her parents, there was her own inner vision of life on the other side of the ocean, there were all the perfect expectations for life, there was a pious and ideal waiting for future love, and now there is just like the Himalayas, the company of thin air, Some are just the youth that will never return, and some are just the sadness of being stung by time.

Chen Weiwei stood up, brushed her hand over the bedside, brushed over the corner of the table, brushed across the balcony, brushed every place she could reach, closed her eyes and let the emotion that began to boil permeate in the palm of her hand, the tremor that burst before it reached the heart, as the blood flowed through every fragile place in the body, all the memories rattled, as if ruthlessly opened by a hurricane, whether it was sad or happy, sad or sorrowful, it was re-unfolded one by one, and the clear reflection was already empty and numb, But you can still perceive the changes of time in your mind.

She brushed over these, already familiar places like old friends, all emotions were constantly changing between stretching and condensing her eyebrows, she breathed desperately, standing in front of every object, her chest was constantly felt, there were past emotions beating on her chest like a drum.

She was very sad, but she had no urge or desire to cry, which for her perhaps only felt a kind of pleasure that was about to be released from the long-lasting repression, and in such a long, polar night-like darkness, she was about to see the sentimentality before the dawn came.

Looking at this room, looking at everything that is so familiar and intimate here, looking at the oil paintings placed around them, one by one scrolls are so quietly placed there, how simple and beautiful they used to be holding a paintbrush gave them the most real and three-dimensional life.

The empty room, Chen Weiwei looked out from the window alone, there was never time outside, because of whose joy or dissatisfaction changed, it was still as dark as it made people feel panicked, and it was still with such a sad color, smearing everything in the city, only the light shined through the leaves, or directly on the ground, but this light was always so powerless in the night surrounded by darkness, but it never stopped fighting against the darkness, just like we are in this vast world, We have always used our thin and strong arms to fight against the changes in this world, even if we know that our strength is insignificant and not enough to change anything, but we are still loyal to our own warriors in life, never give up and want to create, our own success and bravery, until one day we are defeated by anger, hurt by ruthlessness, eroded by loneliness, torn apart by unknown injuries, scattered in the river of life.

She stood in front of the window for a long time, looking at the world outside the window, year after year, month after month, and even day after day of a little starlight, that is the power of happiness in this black, is the light that people light up for life in countless streets and alleys, from the round egg-like light bulb, to the vertical energy-saving lamp that has successfully slimmed down, it seems that these light sources also feel the burden of the years, and they are carrying out a quietly changing weight loss and weight reduction exercise for themselves.

The same is true of life, these times are like weights, constantly accumulating and precipitating in our limited space, weighing on our shoulders, if we want to continue to walk further, we must be ruthless, throw away something appropriately, so that our life is light, and we will not feel so tired.

The lights outside the window from the beginning of a single illumination, to the flickering and changing neon makeup, we are all like these lights, living in a busy city, constantly changing ourselves, to adapt to the needs of life, but suddenly looking back and forgetting, we first began to look.

Chen Weiwei suddenly thought of the crystal candlestick that she almost left in the drawer, she was grateful for the darkness outside the window, if it wasn't for the loneliness of the darkness in front of her, which made her want to be warm, she might not necessarily think of the crystal candlestick that stored her youthful memories.

Chen Weiwei walked to the table and sat down, gently opened the drawer on the right with her hand, and carefully took out the crystal candlestick and placed it in the center of the table.

She wanted to light the crystal candlestick, but found that the light in the room made the candlestick seem a little redundant, so she got up and walked to the door and flipped the switch to turn off the lights in the room.

The room that was still lit just now was wrapped in a black curtain in an instant, and it was wrapped in a black curtain, and it was pitch black, and nothing could be seen, only a trace of cold moonlight shining in from the window, which was left on the corner of the table in front of the window.

Chen Weiwei returned to the table, took out the lighter that had been prepared for a long time but had never come in handy from the drawer, and as her fingertips slid over the lighter, the flame lit up the crystal candlestick.

The flickering light of the candlestick went from dark to bright, illuminating the whole room, Chen Weiwei propped her arms on the table, watching this candlestick burn little by little, just like seeing her own fleeting youth, after wanton squandering, just like the bright light emitted by this candlestick, in the continuous consumption of life's energy, the light is also close to extinction step by step.

The flames that flicker constantly in the burning, in the scorching temperature, slowly melt and volatilize the solidified wax oil, just like the sky above the ice and snow of Antarctica, there is a stronger and warmer sun, the scorching temperature appears, where it should not be, the warmth is misplaced where it belongs, and what melts like that is a kind of melancholy, a kind of helpless sadness and panic.

Time ticks forward, and in the sound of tapping the dial, it is as thin as quicksand, falling into a bottomless vortex that can never be recovered.

Chen Weiwei was intoxicated with the warmth of this candlestick, although she knew that the final result must be that it was gradually extinguished in the flames, and the world returned to darkness.

Chen Weiwei thought that she was going to leave the city tomorrow, and she wanted to use this helplessness to leave some words on the paper to confess, or leave it to her parents as a thought before returning, even though she knew that he {she} was not her biological parents, but the nurturing grace of more than 20 years of hard work was far better than the October pregnancy before being abandoned.

Let's go, this voice that echoed in her heart reminded her of Li Zongsheng's song - The Price of Love, just as the song sings! People have to learn to grow up.

Life always has to be experienced, I don't want to encounter the wind and rain, life can't always stand, there is no wind and rain under the roof, if that's the case, you can't see the so-called red sun.

Chen Weiwei took out the pink fountain pen that had accompanied her for many years, such a fountain pen was specially customized by her when she was in high school and spent a high price from the stationery store owner.

Holding the pink pen that has been by her side for so many years, Chen Weiwei wanted to write something, but hesitated at the moment when the pen fell.

She suddenly thought that this could not be the case, whether for her parents, or for those relatives and friends who prayed for their safety after they left, when they saw these bloody words, it was tantamount to holding a suicide note in their hands in anxiety and anxiety, and their own farewell was an uncertain wait for life and death for them, if these words were quietly placed here, waiting for them to find out and see them, it would be like a catalyst, aggravating their grief.

Of course, there is Jinhong, she doesn't know why, she always thinks of him so uncompetitively, at this time she feels that she doesn't leave any words, so that he will forget himself in his heart, and he will be more desperate, instead of unforgettable and full of melancholy.

Chen Weiwei closed the cap of the pen and prepared to put it back in the drawer, and at the moment when she opened the drawer, the V-shaped customized version of the large diamond ring that Yan Qing gave her before followed the moment the drawer was suddenly opened, and it slid in front of her eyes.

If it weren't for this diamond ring, Chen Weiwei would have thought that she would have cleaned the remaining memories of Yan Qing cleanly and spotlessly.

She clearly remembered that this was given to her that day when Yanqing knelt on the ground in front of the dining table and proposed to herself sincerely, at that time he also said that this diamond ring, the reason why it was made of diamonds to create a huge V-shaped shape, was because his name had the word Weiwei, and the duplicate name represented an important meaning, just like he was in his life, and it was also infinitely superimposed.

She slowly pinched the diamond ring with her fingers and placed it on the table, and under the light of the candle, the surface of the diamond ring was stained, and it was a warm pale yellow shiny.

Chen Weiwei knew that this diamond ring was soaked with all her hatred for Yan Qing, but that kind of hatred was also distorted and transformed by all the previous love, just like with Yan Qing, all the beauty and fascination under the moon before the flowers, in the later injury, like this diamond, turned the original transparent and attractive mirror into the shadows, and became an indelible hatred.

She put the big diamond ring, with the V face forward, on the letterhead without leaving any pen and ink, and waited for the crystal candlestick, which was extinguished in the fading firelight, and she didn't turn on the light again, but just like that, after the alarm clock on the mobile phone, she quietly lay back on the bed and fell asleep.

Chen Weiwei deliberately looked at the time before going to bed, it was 2:00 in the morning, less than three hours from the time to get up, she felt that she hadn't slept for long, after rolling back and forth on the bed a few times, she felt that she had just closed her eyes, and heard the sound of the mobile phone alarm ringing.

Chen Weiwei got up from the bed, it was the next morning, the sky was hazy, and the scene of dawn was brewing, the darkness of the late night had gradually dissipated, and it became fainter and fainter in the hazy light.

Chen Weiwei did not rush to the bathroom in a hurry before leaving, and showed off the flowers and branches she painted like a fairy, but simply looked at the mirror in the house, painted some light makeup, and even wiped her face with a wet wipe, wiped it several times, and then dried it with a dry towel.

She did not go to the door of her parents' bedroom like other partings, gently pushed open the door of the room, and looked at her sleeping parents again, and saw his {her} vicissitudes of life and white hair, and reluctantly burst into tears.

She admitted that her seemingly full and round body, in the face of such an emotional parting, was actually weak, not strong enough at all, she was so scared, she cried out in tears before she turned around, afraid that after she saw it, she couldn't leave this place.

She lightly took her suitcase and went out of the door, and before leaving, Chen Weiwei, a woman who claimed to be a senior housemaid, cleaned up the boudoir for the first time in more than 20 years.

Chen Weiwei, who went downstairs with her luggage, did not drive, but directly dragged her bulky suitcase, took a taxi, and went straight to Capital International Airport.

The car didn't take a while, and arrived at the Capital International Airport, Chen Weiwei dragged her luggage on, the journey that did not mark the return date, she didn't know, whether she would return to this place, and she didn't know how long it would take to come back, at this time she was very confused in her heart, just like standing in the terminal and looking out the window, the fog that was not too big was like a haze, suspended in every corner of the city.

Chen Weiwei, who finished checking in her luggage, sat on the chair in the terminal with her ticket, she was afraid that she would meet familiar people in this harbor full of encounters and separations, so she could only wear the Korean version of big black sunglasses like a star came out, covering one-third of her face, and directly changing her mobile phone from silent mode to shutdown in advance, she even sat there, thinking irresponsibly, in this way, all the joys, sorrows and sorrows in this city have nothing to do with herself.

She was about to leave, and in her heart she was supposed to be the joy and rushing madness before liberation, but she couldn't do it, so perfect success was brewing, and there was not even any motivation to be willing to use it as fuel for such an emotional outburst.

Only the shallow sorrow that lingers, leaning on his shoulder like a friend, dwelling in his own heart.

She doesn't want to care, and she doesn't care if there will be a whole city after she leaves, where all the heavy rain can fall, and she doesn't care if there will be a taste of sadness and bitterness similar to herself in the rain, and she doesn't want to think about the sun after the rain, and she won't shine into the boudoir where she is so faithful, sprinkled on those oil paintings full of life, illuminating those characters and flowers.

In the empty terminal, the sound of boarding announcements was heard in my ears.

"If you have a flight to city A, please bring your boarding pass to the boarding gate to board the plane"

Chen Weiwei wore sunglasses, holding the boarding pass to city A in her hand, and walked towards the boarding gate, no one knew where the place she was going to, maybe it was a tropical country in Southeast Asia, maybe it was a port town in Europe, maybe it was Greece with a white hug, only she knew where to go.

Across the gate, she boarded a flight out of the city, leaving everything in the city out of the clouds.

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