When Kang Ji-chan returned home, he unexpectedly received a phone call, which was from pd Yoo Zhihang, the assistant of the RM program team, telling him that he needed to be there as a vj for the RM shooting next Monday. Jiang Zhican agreed, and came to the filming location of the show early on Monday morning, three days later, in a square outside a building, to get ready.

At around 8 a.m., the members of RM began to arrive one by one, and the filming of the show was about to officially begin, and before that, Kang Zhichan stayed with Huang Jiazi, whom he hadn't seen for several days. The spring is cold, and the two of them are chatting while drinking hot coffee, different from Jiang Zhican's part-time backup vj identity, Huang Jiazi is now a fixed vj of the RM program group, and plans to really stay on the road of vj for a while.

"Zhican, don't look at me like that, I'm not a brain-dead star chaser, it's just that life is too boring, come to RM such an interesting program group as a vj for a while, run and laugh every week, for a guy like me who has no pursuit and no ambition, just eat and wait for death, it's already a very meaningful thing. At least my family is quite supportive, and I don't mess around outside but have a decent job. Well, although it's a bit embarrassing for a young man of my age to be a vj with no future, but it's stable and not easy to mess up, people, it's easy to be satisfied after being disappointed for a long time, and I'm also an explanation to my family. ”

Huang Jiazi sat by the flower bed, and said with a little vicissitudes in his eyes, like a prodigal son who turned back. Jiang Zhican sat next to him, looking at Huang Jiazi's appearance, he didn't know why he hadn't seen him for half a month, Huang Jiazi, who had always been funny and didn't seem to have anything to worry about, became like this, as if he had suddenly matured a lot.

"Why do you still think of me like that? It's really..." Huang Jiazi was a little speechless, grabbed his hair and said helplessly, "Something happened at home recently, and I don't have the ability to help, but I can do it after all, if you keep your own land and don't make trouble." Okay, don't just talk about me, how are you doing? Seeing that you look sluggish and squinting when you see people, you haven't been out for several days, and you can't even stand the light outside? ”

"Well, I haven't been out in the past few days, so I've been staying at home." Jiang Zhican said while holding the coffee. Although he was deliberately groomed and dressed, the bloodshot in his eyes and the tiredness he inadvertently showed could make Huang Jiazi, who was sitting next to him, feel that Jiang Zhican's state was wrong. Huang Jiazi also did this, staying in a dark place where only he was, and he couldn't even tell which time and month it was, and he was swallowed up by loneliness and decadence.

It's just that Jiang Zhican will be like this, he was a little surprised, and he didn't understand whether Jiang Zhican was busy with work or other reasons, so he asked, "What are you doing at home?" ”

"Play games."

"Huh?" Huang Jiazi was stunned.

"I just learned it, in fact, I'm quite talented, and I can be super god." Jiang Zhican smiled and said.

"You're not going to be serious, are you?" Huang Jiazi was still a little incredulous, in his impression that Jiang Zhichan was a legendary self-disciplined and stubborn good student, especially after knowing that Jiang Zhichan was born in Seoul University, he was proud to have such a friend. But now, his good student friend actually told him that he stayed at home and played games for three days, which made him a little unacceptable, and he felt that a certain part of his heart was about to collapse.

"Didn't you say it yourself, people are easy to be satisfied after being disappointed for a long time, and now I am in disappointment. Well, to be precise, it's the disappointment of giving up on myself that I have nothing to do, and maybe when the disappointment is enough, I will be able to find something that will satisfy me. Whether it is the pursuit of dreams in the ivory tower or the life and work in the real world, we must always find a balance so that people can live meaningfully! Do you say yes, friend? ”

"Hell, your theory is really demagogic." Huang Jiazi pursed his lips and suddenly said, "Do you know a sentence called 'satisfaction day by day, representing the depravity of day by day', I am hopeless, and I am willing to fall into satisfaction, what about you, Jiang Zhicanxi, do you want to be the same as me?" I don't think you're going to get the satisfaction of being as depraved as I am now. Because people are never generalized, you and I are two completely different people. ”

"Let me tell you something," Huang Jiazi continued with a sip of coffee, "I have talked about several girlfriends, but none of them are more than three months old, do you know why?" Because the reason for the breakup was never my cheating, it was her splitting legs, and before the emotional conflict occurred, we got together and broke up. But there is one girl who is very different, that is, my last girlfriend, I really liked her, broke off the ambiguous relationship for her, worked hard for her to return home, and even planned to take her home, just wait for my parents to agree, and marry her. ”

As a result, she split her legs, and there were other men in her heart. At that time, I thought, many things, I have experienced a lot, maybe it will become inertia, maybe among the girls in the past, there are also those who really like me and want to get along with me, but I have to leave because of my cheating, or my good reunion and good dispersion, so that she can't even say the last retention. Therefore, when my last girlfriend proposed to break up, although I was very reluctant in my heart, I still told her that it would be good to get together and disperse, and we ended up peacefully, which was neither tragic nor bleak. If it were you, Naochan, what do you think you would do? ”

"I don't know."

Jiang Zhican, a primary school student whose emotional experience is still in the stage of holding hands and walking, faced the math problem of the geometry level of the love field university proposed by Huang Jiazi, and honestly handed in the blank paper.

"Zhican, some people have some things, they often know whether they like it or not, whether it is suitable or not, whether it is suitable or not, regardless of gender or type of thing, it is so strange. You and I, counting this is the third time we have met, but we are temporary roommates who have lived in the same room, and this relationship is not much shallow. I remember the first time we met, I thought you were a friend of my appetite, and then I talked a lot to you, in fact, many people will not be able to stand me like this, but you are different, at least you listened patiently, even if you didn't make any remarks, let me play a one-man show alone, but I still feel happy, because there is an audience like you around me. ”

Jiang Zhican was silent when he heard this, which reminded him of Xu Xian, the girl who was surrounded by people under the lights in front of the snack bar; I thought of Ahn Hee-yeon again, the club girl who held his arm when he was still a stranger, and the black slender legs that lingered in my mind; In the end, Jiang Zhican rubbed his eyes and tried his best not to think about it, but that half-hidden face was like the most tenacious creeper, taking root and entwining in his heart, telling him that no matter how unwilling he was to admit it, he couldn't deny this fact.

"Saying this, it's nothing more than to tell you that I still understand your temperament more or less, if you encounter a situation like me, Zhican, I dare to say, you have **, you can't let go. Because your paranoia is much higher than mine, well, paranoid like a madman, maybe it's a person of your temperament. You may think that what I said is wrong, but when your identity and ability go up - don't doubt yourself, being young and poor means nothing - and when you really have a successful career, I dare say that the greatest strength and weakness of your personality will definitely be clearly perceived by yourself. ”

"But you can't talk too much, now you, if this happens, if the woman is richer and more status than you, the self-esteem of men in the Republic of Korea, I'm afraid you won't be able to keep it, right? Suffering and forbearance, or like you say, playing games all day long to vent, because of the disappointment of self-abandonment with nothing to do, and constantly falling, but straight, you will definitely feel very painful, and even if you fall to the bottom of hell, you will not get the satisfaction of salvation.

"Because in the heart of a man like you, there is always a greedy devil who will not be satisfied; And my heart, as long as there is an angel's feather, can be full of hymns and holy light for a long time, and fall into self-deception and satisfaction. This, and that is the biggest difference between us, is that I can be satisfied with disappointment, while your fictitious satisfaction—the supergods in the game, and the like—will only be a day by day depravity, and the nature of suffering will not change in the slightest. ”

Jiang Zhican looked at the coffee in his hand, didn't speak for a long time, and finally suddenly smiled: "What you said is your life perception?" ”

"Of course, no." A trace of embarrassment flashed across Huang Jiazi's face, "However, it's just a part of what my father taught me, but I've lived for twenty-five years, so I've seen more than you, right?" ”

"Ne, Cassan Smeta!" Jiang Zhican smiled brightly, hugged Huang Jiazi's shoulder, and said softly, "Really, thank you very much, brother!" ”