readx; After reading M's three short essays and the conclusion at the end of the article, Chang Berry suddenly felt that M's old cow seemed to be casual but seemed to be intentional, prompting her of some problems in life and love. Pen × fun × Pavilion www. ｂｉｑｕｇｅ。 info So she replied to Lao Niu:

Hee-hee, old cow, first, thank you for your concern for the calf; The second is to talk about my feelings after reading. Does the first Bible story you wrote show that "marriage and love are actually a kind of fate", and that the goodness of the heart may lead to an ideal life? The second story tells whether it is telling whether it is "to take anything that comes seriously to it, even if it is a bad thing or a good thing"; The third story, Maverick, thinks it is more instructive, illustrating the importance of the backbone of the "friend" team, and also showing that you should not be "greedy" at any time. Isn't that so, old cow?

After Chang Berryzi sent a message, she actually held the mobile phone in her hand, and she believed that Lao Niu would reply to the message soon. Sure enough, after a while, I heard the message prompt music play......

Haha, Maverick, you're right! That's smart. However, this is just a story that I rewrote from the Bible, and I actually voted for the newspaper of the company I am working for now. Of course it was published. Maybe it makes some sense to the company's employees. Some resemble "chicken soup" text. However, I longed for Buddhism but did not convert to it; My wife used to believe in Jesus, but I don't believe in it, but because of her, I am now reading the Bible. Okay, let's not talk about that; Are you doing well? Which section does the Love March play to?

After reading Lao Niu's information, Chang Berry felt a little strange, why did he say that his former wife, could it be that he married a new wife? Hee-hee, gotta ask! She thought, these three words could not explain her worries and sadness. And about his intimate contact with his new boyfriend, it is inconvenient to talk to Lao Niu in detail. So she had no choice but to call Mr. M:

Hello, old cow! I can't tell you about some things, so I have to call you. See your message Maverick is smiling too! Why do you say your former wife? Don't? Oh, that's it, old cow? It turned out that you said the wrong thing, and there was an extra "of" word in the sentence group of "former wife" in the message, hehe, I thought that the old cow didn't want the old sister-in-law, and my calf had a new sister-in-law?

Actually, about me, I won't tell you anything, old cow! In fact, my relationship with Li seems to be good, and I can't detect the slightest hint of hypocrisy in him towards me. But I just think it's not a problem to treat me as a real girlfriend for a long time, and not want to get married? Yes, that's what you're talking about! Oops, old cow! Let me tell you, he bought me a pair of jade bracelets that are worth a lot of money, and I accepted them. It's a token of our love. yes, but you don't think Mavericks are greedy for money, do you? Oh no, that's good!

Niu Niu has also told you Lao Niu before, and his original affection for his girlfriend has not evolved into reality in me. Even though my calf is very good to him! So the old cow, the little cow, I have been sad in my heart now, and at the same time secretly entangled!

Oh Maverick, I'm really hard to say, if you want to say it, then you'll be silent! Since you have accepted his jade bracelet, it means that you have been lassoed and the calf has been put on a nose rope. Haha, yes, I'm laughing at you, but it's just to make you laugh, nothing else, don't think about it.

Of course, don't think too much about it! Besides, you don't have no reason to destroy him to get married? Yes, you have to destroy him, there are some good things in this world, and there are always long nights and dreams. Well, yes, that's just the advice of the old cow. There is a saying: The song of the sue is not easy to sing, but it is better to read the music yourself. In short, don't be sad, and there's no need to dwell on it. Wrinkled calves if you go on like this! Of course, if your calf is depressed and has nowhere to vent, Lao Niu will give you some self-made and self-"directed" jokes to relieve your boredom.

Okay, old cow! I'm still very depressed at this time, saying things are things, can you send it to me quickly?

Oh, my God! Didn't Lao Niu say just now, it takes time to write and direct by yourself. My story is not a "wizard" who is a ghost, with long sleeves flicked, and it comes as soon as it is said! Ha ha. Tomorrow, tonight.

Okay, old cow, but we have to wait until tomorrow, then the calf's life will die again tonight!

Okay, Maverick, in order to save Maverick's life, Lao Niu will write down his life tonight. That's it, you can get busy......

At night, Chang Berry happened to be not working overtime; And the boyfriend surnamed Li on the phone said that he worked overtime at night, and at the same time invited Chang Berry to come to him later. Chang Berry hung up the phone, smiled bitterly and said in his heart, I should go to you, and I should do it to give you a bowl of noodles; It's just my old chestnut, I'm afraid that you will keep the calf...... Thinking of this, I can't help but feel a little upset and sad.

The depressed Chang Berry picked up the mobile phone and prepared to swipe WeChat, just when he saw that QQ had a "message". She was suddenly overjoyed, knowing that it was Lao Niu who had sent her a story! Hee-hee, this old cow, it's done so quickly! Alas, those who know me, old cow also!

1. Xiao Q's embarrassment: "I didn't mean it"

(a)

Xiao Q has liked to be in a daze since he was a child, and he didn't understand that his peers were playing tricks on him, seeing him dumbfounded like a deaf person, so he suddenly put a big firecracker in his ear, thinking that this would scare him a lot. Although he immediately felt a sense of embarrassment and irritation, he was still fine. The children were bored and angrily came to him and said, "Are you deaf?" He calmly said to them: I am deaf, I did not mean to!

Xiao Q often messed up his mother's combed hair when he went to school, and forgot about the other after rolling up one trouser leg...... He never wears brightly colored clothes with color. His mother simply made him plain or dark clothes to wear, and he was so dumbfounded that one day on the evening road, a dazzled old lady asked him for directions, and politely called him old man. When the old lady heard his milky answer, she said, "Oh my God, it's a child." He said: I'm sorry, I didn't mean to.

Xiao Q spent his teenage years in the countryside. He grew up pedantic. At that time, the rural water source was environmentally friendly, so few people used wells. Outside the village is a small lake or pond. When Xiao Q comes home from school, he often carries water for the family. A few times he came to the waterhole with a bucket, and without going down to the dock to fetch water, he unknowingly returned home with an empty bucket, and his mother asked, "Idiot, how many miles of water are you carrying?" He put down the bucket and saw that it was empty, so he said, "Mom, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to."

Xiao Q later fell in love. Every time I go to my girlfriend's house and see my future mother-in-law, I call my mother affectionately...... After getting married, he sent his lover back to his parents' house, and his lover's eldest sister came out to greet him, and he blurted out to her eldest sister: Mom! So everyone present laughed all at once, and the lover's eldest sister blushed. My lover asked: You are not short-sighted and not farsighted, why do you call my eldest sister a mother? He replied in a whisper: I didn't mean to......

(b)

Lao Q went out to work and rented a house outside the company. Every time, the old man who guards the rental building will sit under the willow tree outside the door, and his little grandson will sit at the door watching TV; Every time he passed by, he would habitually touch the child's head, squat down and pinch the little nose...... After work that day, he subconsciously touched the head again when he passed by the door of the rental building, and then squatted down to pinch the little guy's nose. But this time he was shocked, it turned out that it was not a child, it was his grandfather who was watching the dormitory building! The old man was staring at him angrily...... He said, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to, I didn't know you had changed seats with your child."

Once, Lao Q set the newspaper version after editing the proofs to the newspaper printing instrument of the engineering printing department, and then took a large bundle of paper rolls to the printing lady's desk. The young lady hurriedly stood up to help. Because the field was too narrow, she accidentally let her chest against his chest in the rush, and he stepped back and said, "I didn't mean to." The young lady suddenly bowed her head and blushed. At this time, he also blushed and scolded himself in his heart: You are really too much! It's hard to make a girl's house feel ......

A work partner suddenly fell ill, Lao Q rushed to the bus to sell her medicine, it was raining heavily, he hurriedly got on the bus, when he sat down, he couldn't help but scream, and then stood up and laughed three times! It turned out that the flannel seat cushion on the chair was full of water, and he felt that his ass was all wet, even to the inside of his crotch. Several young people in the car laughed and laughed, and he touched his fat buttocks and said: Sorry! I didn't mean to. So, a carload of people laughed!

Second, the ghost and Lao Pu quarrel wildly

Pu: Hey, hey! Where the hell did you come from? If you don't report it, you will go to heaven and go wild?

Ghost: What's the matter? From the ground! I've consulted God! Who are you? Can you handle it?

Pu: I'm a poet! You're like a ghost, and you don't know me. I've written more than 900 lyric poems, have you heard of them?

Ghost: Oh, got it! What are more than 900 poems? If I were a poet, I would write a thousand! But why did you come here to guard the garden?

Pu: After being nurtured by my love poems, those two people broke the rules of heaven and were punished by God and sent to the world.

Ghost: Oh, I see, so you're here for the changing of the guard? Just impatient? Did you deliberately duel with someone to guard the garden for God? So did you eat snake fruit?

Pu: The love customs of that era transcended reality! I ate snake fruit, but I always think that imported apples are not as delicious as the world!

Ghost: You're talking nonsense! Still say it's not delicious? Is the fruit of heaven not as good as that of the earth? But if you eat it for nothing, you can't soak a girl here, but you can't soak a girl, just soak a poem that doesn't rain!

Pu: You're right! God there's a chick there who won't let you bubble! What did you just say, what is a poem that doesn't rain?

Ghost: Returning the poem? So lacking in association? If it doesn't rain, it's a sunny day, and it's a love poem!

Pu: Who knows your Chinese ghost characters? But I don't have women, wine, salons, balls, and ghost poems? I didn't expect heaven to be poetic! Alas! Never mind! I think I wrote more than 200 love poems back then!

Ghost: You're not talking nonsense, you have written so many love poems, there must be a lot of lovers, right?

Pu: Of course, what a wonderful tsarist era it was! I've got a lot of lovers! Say there are 36 less (not counting my wife), say more than 100!

Ghost: Oh my God! But in this way, you are a saint of love, not a saint of poetry! So many lovers write more than 200 love poems? You're not ashamed!

Pu: What do you think! How many lovers do you have? So why don't you write a love poem?

Ghost: I only write ghost poems? But to put it mildly: if I want to have a lover, I will have 1,000 dreams for her, write 300 love poems for her, and dream her in the "heart" and bury her in the "private".

CP: You're too confident, aren't you? According to my analysis, you have 1 lover, but this one is unreliable! Look at your ghostly nature? You have violated the rules of heaven, and now you know why God called you to heaven, right?

Ghost: You're talking nonsense! How do you know? God didn't call me, I consulted him, and he didn't allow me to come from my own children. What if I have a lover? My wife and I are a friend, but unfortunately she is already a ghost! But to say that my lover is a well-behaved person, not like yours!

Pu: What's wrong with my lover? You're ghost-chewing again! Why? Tell me about it!

Ghost: Which of your lovers is human? It's not a grain or a salamander, it's not sugarcane or a piglet, it's not a wolong or a sitting frog, it's not ......

Pu: Don't talk nonsense, you slander my lover! You'll have to name them!

Ghost: Okay, for example, listen, the baogu salamander, the sugarcane monkey, the Wolong frog......

P: It's no wonder you're not going to blame! You're pronouncing my lover's name in the Chinese vernacular! You're probably talking about Bakunina, Goncharova and Vorontsova, right?

Ghost: I don't know who it is? Anyway, it's your lover's name, and what kind of snails and sharks......

Pu: I'm not poor with you! You talk nonsense like a ghost, and you just can't talk about it!

Ghost: If you are not poor, you are not poor, go to God! I created a painting of the Garden of Eden and gave it to him.

CP: Do you know how to draw? Take me first! What kind of ghost painting is it seeing?

Oni: It's a tonal painting anyway! Although it's the old-fashioned sub-grandfather Xia Grandmother, the snake demon in it is not bad, hehe, it's not like the nameless one you painted! It's not ashamed that you still use a pen and aluminum pen to draw those ghosts fighting and sending your lover!

Pu: You know a ghost! I drew a sketch! Like my poems, fresh and natural, you send paintings to God to win him over, want him to die happily and reward you with an angel, look at your ghostly virtue, delusional about you!

Ghost: That's why you're here? I don't want angels, I already found one in the world, and I wrote a contract, but she said that God didn't sign and seal, it doesn't count! So......

Pu: Perverts! So report to God! Who knows what the hell you have in mind? Don't take the angels away when you see them, don't move any of them, you must know that I have always liked beautiful women!

Ghost: You're a pervert, you think you just like beautiful women? You said you wouldn't bring it if you didn't let me bring it? I didn't want to bring it, but I want to bring it now! What's up?

Pu: What's the matter? You take the angel away, and I'll fight you trickster!

Ghost: Do you think I'm afraid of you if you're a poet? A duel is a duel! I am the devil, who am I afraid of?

Pu: Wow! You think I'm afraid of ghosts? I am a poet and an angel, who is afraid of whom? ……