You are gone, with disappointment and sadness; I'm gone, too, slowly soaking away a little bit of love in disappointment and sadness. Red Lotus, if we never see each other from now on, if from now on I am also like a subject of the two-faced country, the front is "pleasant, humble and lovely", the negative side is "rat eyes and eagle nose, tongue like a steel knife", then maybe the tragedy of life will not befall you and me so much, if I am also like Luling Yizi, the Tao through Peng Ze, all the boat into the lake, seeking to get the wish, then we may really be able to live a few days of poor couples, but also can enjoy a few days of happiness for men and women weaving......

Du Ruo came back from the mountains in obsession, and the sky was already dark. The faint outline of the small station protrudes in black and suddenly on the forest belt of the mountain beams, the wind blows the rustle of the trees, it is not the red lotus that follows, the footsteps are fine, and the desire to go stops; The scattered lights in the work area are swept out of the faint bright color by the wind, looking at the shadow of the tree in the distance, the branches and leaves are draped, this style is like a red lotus, every time the new moon rises out of the East Ridge, the red lotus always likes to spread out the hair on the head, standing in the mountain shadow and moonlight, throwing a string of silver bells broken in the clear light, let the wind caress the moon love, graceful and colorful......

Du Ruo returned home in a daze, the house was deserted, the dark shadows of the mountain beams were staggered on the four walls, and the wilted and dry chirping of insects outside the window came for a while, which made his heart even more empty. Du Ruo reluctantly restrained himself from pacing in the room for a few steps, and cursed himself in a sullen voice, then fell on the sofa, and the flower-like smile of the red lotus and the jade-like demeanor appeared in front of him again.

Du Ruoxing shook his head like a wooden, and his two wooden eyes looked out of the window in distraction. In the past years, Du Ruo's fate was difficult, and even more unfortunate was that he had a pretentious heart that could not be ordinary in ordinary years. A person who is difficult to save his face in the surrounding living environment will naturally have no chance of love and marriage, whose good girl is willing to be said to be a white egg that cannot be taken out of the old eagle's nest under the moon, and it is a beautiful eyebrow to show the blind, not to mention the physiological characteristics, cultural quality, and socioeconomic status have an impact on the choice of surname and love, and even a little bit of heart is hazy, and the romantic interest is also hazy. However, Du Ruo feels good about himself, and he is also good at what he does, although he still has no regrets after nine deaths, isn't it just a squirt, a narrow shoulder, wide crotch and crotch animal, do not have some love with Du Ruo, so that Du Ruo's energy and enthusiasm have a place to vent, Du Ruo is still too lazy to love, as the saying goes, the chicken does not nod the phoenix nods, and the cow does not happen and the horse does not happen. However, more often, Du Ruo's heart was gloomy, and he watched the marriage of the same age as himself, who usually doesn't look down on him, and his wife was still a little touching, and after marriage, it was the child's father who was with him. Du Ruo is discouraged, melancholy, and compassionate: he believes that the current social consciousness is a kind of historical lazy power, a roadblock on the road to individual freedom, and people's habits and surnames are still only stuck in the non-moral judgment of obeying the elders in the small-scale peasant economy to abide by the traditional contentment. If Du wants to fully stretch his surname, fully realize himself, and transform his inner creativity into external material and spiritual wealth, he will inevitably go against the two laws of social consciousness. So people called him a Du madman who took the wrong medicine, and a Du painter who carved flowers at the bottom of the well, which is very reasonable; People who are half-cut into the ground don't even see what a woman looks like when she sleeps in bed, and it's just a critical mindset of the social value system about social roles. So Du Ruo wanted to open it, and he had the courage to throw away all the traditions, dignity, and social public opinion that oppressed the soul, and continued to enjoy his fun of creating life, and continued to do his colorful dream of "debuting on the dragon and tiger list in one fell swoop and reaching the phoenix pool in ten years". Just as a dilapidated temple is still a temple, so a toppled icon is still a god......

"Wrong, everything is wrong, you fool!" Du Ruohuo got up from the sofa, subconsciously paced a few steps in the room, and walked ignorantly from the window to the door, and from the door to the window, muttering as if playing a double reed, "What about your good hopes?" What about your lofty ideals? Aren't you a bard in the mountains rather than a thief in the city? You are so high, you are so arrogant, you are so unearthly, how can you even look down on a woman in the mountains! It's time to wake up, fool! Don't you know that the pursuit of the surname is closely related to the pursuit of happiness, you don't say that hardship is just a means, and happiness in life is the goal! Isn't your left and right inscription a flower to drink wine, and you don't go upstairs without a moon! If you continue to eat the ancients like this, obsessively do not come to your senses, cling to the gourd without opening the petals, and stubbornly guarding the granite head without opening the mind, then the poor and destitute will be just behind you, maybe it will really be like an abandoned terracotta figurine, and you will never be able to get out of the mountain for a lifetime! ”

For more than ten years, Du Ruo's happy life has passed between desire and desire, Du Ruo's happy life is thrown between pain and emptiness and boredom, a little favorite hope to maintain Du Ruo's behavioral consciousness, and the most brilliant dream to guide Du Ruo's ideological foundation are all wrong now! For more than ten years, Du Ruo sacrificed his youth and love, and ruined his reputation and dignity for the sake of these favorite hopes and most brilliant dreams, just so that one day because of this sacrifice and destruction, he could leave the cramped living environment in the mountains, and stay away from the poor years in the mountains that wore out people's will, so that he could be like a city man who has a place to stretch his surname eight hours away, and hunt for more freedom of personal emotional life in a broader world. And now it's all wrong! Du Ruo thinks that as long as he steps on iron shoes, wears iron inkstones, travels thousands of miles, reads thousands of books, and trains himself to be full of poetry and books, erudite and versatile, the society will one day let him dedicate his wisdom and talent due to the evolution of the times. Du Ruo believes that people's high socioeconomic status can improve the value of love, and the superior living standard and comfortable lifestyle provided by the man must have a realistic superposition effect on the surname of the female surname, but Honglian just abandoned him! There is nothing in the world that is more heartbreaking than this self-deception of oneself, and there is nothing in the world that is more heartbreaking than this oneself-setting misunderstanding in life!

Du Ruo smiled bitterly, his lips twitched slightly, and he walked to the door crookedly, looking at the row of magnificent bookcases on the opposite wall, and at the beautifully framed oil paintings hanging on the four walls. That's what art is called! All of Du Ruo's misfortunes, famines, and ups and downs in the world are brought about by these unlucky things, and it is these unlucky things that make him boast of his father and the fallacy of others, and now it is difficult to distinguish whether he is a human or a beast! For a while, Du Ruo felt ashamed that he had sacrificed his youth and love so much for these things in the past, and felt ashamed that he had ruined his reputation and dignity in the past and was so intoxicated with these things! For a moment he even hated these things, and in a trance, it was as if he had entered a strange world, and all these things on the four walls had turned into some kind of hideous and ferocious monster that was viciously squeezing him, and Du Ruo ran to the door of the house as if he had fled, and then a deep contempt and contempt for these things flashed through his mind. Du Ruo no longer wants to use his youth and love to show his devotion to these things, and Du Ruo is no longer willing to use his reputation and dignity to show his obedience to these things!

Du Ruo finally couldn't bear it anymore, picked up the mop on the side of the door, crackled and beat all over the room, the inkstone, rice paper, and paintbrush on the table were scattered all over the ground, and the plaster statues, Tang Sancai, and hanging scroll paintings in the bookcase were smashed to pieces. Then Du Ruo burst into hysterical laughter, rejoicing that he had finally been able to banish these things from the depths of his soul, and that he would never have to have to bother with them again. However, it didn't take long for him to cry inexplicably, as if he had swallowed a hairy apricot, as if he had eaten a green walnut, and as if he had eaten a broken root grass, he was not ashamed to feel ashamed. He first cried very suppressed, with a strange look on his face that he had suffered misfortune and vaguely had a few aftermath of life, and then he cried very unbridledly, muttering the name of the red lotus in his mouth, and then he cried very aggrievedly, and sat down on the sofa, staring blankly at the broken objects swaying with a dark halo on the ground, and the tears flowed down the twisted muscles of his face, and dripped all the way to the books or picture albums that he called these things that were spread out or warped around him......

The night is deep, the dark sky outside the window has been transformed into a purple bright color, the stars shine through a few flying clouds like scales and close to the peaks, and the mountains and forests that are hidden by the night and shaken by the wind also begin to show a clear outline in the night darkness, from time to time there are a few withered leaves falling from the closed window lattice, which makes the night deeper and quieter, and the surroundings are silent.

Du Ruo let out a lazy sigh, closed his eyes listlessly, and his skull buzzed like a swarm of bees in a nest. At this moment, there was a slight sound in the room, followed by a very small sigh. Du Ruo's whole body was excited, his heart was pounding, he ran to the bedroom in three or two steps, snapped and turned on the bedside lamp, through the thick mosquito net, Honglian was squinting his eyes, curling up on the side of the bed in fear, the eyelashes that were like long curtains closed violently shook twice, and then slowly soaked out two crystal teardrops.

Du Ruo was surprised and delighted for a moment, a huge joy, which made the blood in his whole body boil, but in an instant, a heart-wrenching pain firmly grabbed him, and his thoughts surged like a dark and boundless water current, which made him suddenly feel a bang in his head, and he couldn't help but kneel in front of the bed, and his hands tightly grasped Honglian's hand stretched out outside the quilt, and grasped his weeping and rippling face, "Honglian, if my brother is sorry for you!" ”

The red lotus shrank all over her body, and a regenerative warm current permeated her body, and the person suddenly woke up from the state of numb and sluggish grief. She wanted to pull her hand away, slap him hard, push him away, and then walk away, but Du Ruo didn't look like a pretentious mournful demeanor, undisguised pain, and the brutal energy that used to be angry with her, evil to her, and splashing dirty water on her was gone. Honglian felt a hazy longing for love in her heart, a sincere yearning for love, happiness and a happy marriage, and like a vague mist swirling in front of her, she couldn't help but pounce on Du Ruo's shoulder, with an unaccustomed nervous and fearful excitement, and gently rubbed her tearful face on Du Ruo's shoulder.

"If brother, Red Lotus likes you, I want you to like Red Lotus too, Red Lotus can indeed feel that life can't live without you. Red Lotus misses you all the time and wants to be with you all the time, but Red Lotus is extremely afraid of being with you, and sometimes even feels very tired of being with you. Red Lotus can't tell the mystery here, maybe you understand this better. Red Lotus can only soak in lovesickness every time, looking forward to seeing each other, but every time we meet, it can't bring me joy. The red lotus is very painful, and the red lotus often looks forward to a happy life in the future, and whenever we walk together, I wonder if we will be truly happy in the future. Maybe I'm a bad mountain girl who demands too much from you! From now on, Red Lotus will no longer think about it, and entrust her love to you wholeheartedly, and Red Lotus will be a good wife, trying her best to dispel the shadow that hangs over you, so that you can devote yourself to painting your paintings. It's really not ashamed, and I haven't even seen a woman's body. What does painting have to do with a woman's body? Brother Ruo, you can paint, you don't know that Red Lotus likes knowledgeable and educated people! You paint, Honglian shows you the body, our grandmother said that a man will only love a woman with all his heart after seeing her body! ……”

Du Ruo's heart suddenly swayed, and a wisp of excitement from the heart jumped on his eyebrows, and his whole body was immersed in a rich joy. Looking at the red lotus being washed by the tears of the clear and beautiful white face without the slightest earthly dirt, looking at the red lotus drunk in the long love and looking like the bright eyes of the crescent moon, Du Ruo is like the red lotus has turned into an immortal, in front of her she is more like a lotus flower on the surface of the pond reflected in the moonlight, with the cold dew on her shoulders, holding the warm breeze in her arms, the whole body is so elegant, so clean, and so bright, full of freshly baked extraordinary charm......

Du Ruo couldn't help but hug the red lotus, and put his face tightly on the soft and plump breasts of the red lotus, for a while Du Ruo felt that it was sticking to a round of hot sun, the milk peaks of the red lotus's garden, the low milk valley, like the sun, bright and warm around him, how warm, how quiet, and how comforting. Du Ruo suddenly felt his lips twitch, and a few tears of excitement overflowed in his eyes. He lifted the quilt little by little, and the red lotus was only lying on the bed with a thin quilt on his body, and his face was as white as the snow in the distant mountains in winter, which was dazzling [***], Du Ruo felt that his eyes were straight for a while, and his heart was like countless ants crawling. Look at the forehead of the red lotus that is as bright as spring water, the eyebrows that are as green as the spring mountains, the gentle drooping eyelids of the red lotus, the beautiful and neat lips, the delicate and convex curves of the red lotus's chest and buttocks, and the crystal-like transparency that fills the whole body. Du Ruo only felt that every nerve fiber in his body was excited, the heat wave in his heart began to flow, and the chaotic reverie, willingness, and emotion in his mind came to naught, a hidden ** from the dantian, a painful expectation that had been suppressed for a long time mixed with too many longings and hopes, and couldn't help but make him gasp like a bull in heat. He pressed the red lotus tightly to his chest, and his face was flushed with a few bits from the eagerness. However, it didn't take long for him to wake up from his frenzy, and he had no doubt about the guilt of the rules and virtues that had sprung up from there, and the terrible thought that a deep-seated contact with his loved one would lead to the destruction of true love. He barely managed to restrain his trembling body, and he could hear his heartbeat, and he could see the look on his face in the mirror. Look at the red lotus shyly drooping her long eyelashes, her face was instantly filled with the red glow burned by excitement, she was so delicate and seductive, and her heart couldn't help but be stunned again, tenderness and honey quickly floated up, and the calm slowly returned to her heart......

"Don't ...... Other...... If brother! I'm afraid—"

The moon has passed in the middle of the sky, the moonlit night of the small station is extraordinarily quiet, as if everything is intoxicated in the caress of the moonlight, the tall glass window lattice can see the mist on the opposite hill in the reluctant kiss of the green mountain, a few wandering stars suddenly seem to be unable to bear the loneliness of the cocoon, one by one blinked to the house, under the eaves a bird perched in the shade of the tree also seems to be infected by some kind of infection, from time to time flapping its wings, making one or two courtship chirps.

Du Ruowei leaned over and kissed Honglian's chest, neck and cheeks over and over again, sometimes he looked strong and domineering, and put his mouth tightly on Honglian's lips, so that Honglian moved "hmm", sometimes he looked gentle and dear, and bit Honglian's earlobes and nose lightly, so that Honglian couldn't help but shout softly, stretched his eyebrows and eyes, and let out a series of excited funny moans.

Red Lotus lay lazily on the bed, at the mercy of Du Ruo's fiery exhalation and overwhelmed hands, enduring vague pain and vaguely realized humiliation to accommodate Du Ruo's every movement......

After that, it was a strong conquest with a barbaric caste......

Du Ruo faintly felt that Honglian was a little unwilling to give in and a little flustered, but this resistance further strengthened his desire. Du Ruo suddenly felt that he was walking in the fairyland, surrounded by faint green mountains, low and faint green water, the flowers pulled the joy and floated out the most beautiful smile, the grass danced with waist branches and danced the most beautiful dance, the wind blew away the dirt on his journey, the rain washed out a fresh world, and gave him the most beautiful mood and the most joyful emotions. Du Ruo felt that he was a hero walking through the swamp, looking back at the vast grassland, the dark clouds raging against the sky, and the wind carrying the raindrops violently shaking the grass and trees......

Du Ruo has finally gone through ups and downs and can breathe the free air of the world; Du Ruo finally went through humanity and walked into the most beautiful season of love on the road of life. He can enjoy the pleasures, the happiness, the physical and mental pleasures that people can enjoy; The fame, fortune, and social status that people can't enjoy, he can enjoy now. Who said that the infinite past is based on the present, and the infinite future is based on the present, the present is the critical point between a mediocre person and a sage, the present philosophy of a mediocre person is to go with the flow, and the present philosophy of a sage is to struggle, to pursue, to endure more suffering......

"You...... You're so faint! What will you do in the future—"

"Don't ...... Other! Red Lotus, my dear! I will always remember this evening! This life and this life will not live up to you! My dearest person in this world is you, I must listen to your words, and then paint, use my brush to knock on the palace of art, so that you, me, and our children will never stay in this ravine for a lifetime, and will borrow a piece of water and soil in the city, support a piece of blue sky, and enjoy the happiness of life at a high level! Thank you, dear! (To be continued.) )