Alas, man has no eyes before and after, and can know the past, present, and future. If a person has a disease, cover his heart and shine on it, then he knows where the disease is, and he takes medicine to bait, and all of them are cured. I am not a subject of the Lin Kingdom, so naturally I have no chance to meet the immortal mirror. And the Buddha said: There are three realms and six realms of confusion, maze, maze, and lost, I have strayed into the maze since then, and have been wandering in the maze for several years, but in the end I have gone farther and farther on the lost path. I have struggled and sunk, if it weren't for the creation of people in the dark, if it weren't for the wrong rope tie under the moon, I might not have taken another path in life......

"Brother Ruo, this is where to go, people can't walk anymore!"

It was a slightly hot and white day in autumn and August. At that time, the long wind swept the clouds and mist in the clear sky, and the sun swayed golden ripples with a bright and joyful brilliance against the field. At that time, the red, yellow, and white flowers that lay on the tender green branches, crouched on the green mountains, and leaned on the banks of the turquoise streams and rivers bloomed. The chickadees chirped in the sun-drenched jungle and leaped lightly on the expanding branches. At that time, thousands of mountains were horizontal, thousands of rivers were covered with autumn shadows, and the heaven and earth were awe-inspiring in a solemn and clear place......

Du Ruo smiled affectionately, reached out and grabbed the red lotus's sweat-soaked palm, "Hold on a little longer, and you will reach the mountain in front of you!" ”

"Alas, it's so far away!" Red Lotus pursed her lips, glanced at the green mountain peaks high in the sun, and threw down Du Ruo's hand coquettishly.

"Red Lotus, let's compete and see who gets on first!"

"What about losing?"

"Pick your nose!"

"Ah——, good!" Honglian clasped her palms together and shrugged her nose happily, "Brother Ruo, look over there!" Du Ruoguo really turned his head to look, "Hehe, you've been fooled!" Red Lotus made a coquettish grimace, threw down a string of silver bells broken on the mountain road, and walked a dozen steps in a smoke.

Du Ruo smiled slightly, picked up the sketchpad, and also strode forward, looking halfway up the mountain, Honglian slowed down breathlessly, her smooth forehead was covered with fine beads of sweat, "Honglian, let's rest for a while, look at you tired!" ”

"Ah, you want to pick me cheap, no way!" Red Lotus glanced at Du Ruo with a white head, and a smile appeared on her red fluttering face, while speeding up her pace more lightly.

Du Ruo smiled and shook his head, deliberately taking a few steps behind, watching the red lotus's hair beating briskly behind his head, and his colorful back swept all the way across the verdant grass. Du Ruo only felt a full of affection rushing into his heart, a different kind of tenderness made him feel like he had eaten honey, the corners of his mouth involuntarily cracked a touch of sweet laugh lines, and he ran to the peak in one breath. Red Lotus said "ouch", took off her coat, and lay on her back on the grass.

Du Ruo put down the drawing board, picked up the clothes that Honglian threw aside, and sat down next to Honglian, "Get up, drink some water, it's windy here, be careful of catching a cold!" ”

"Go, I want to make a bad heart!" Honglian pushed Du Ruo away with a strange palm, got up lightly, turned over to the opposite side and lay down, and took out a handkerchief and put it on his face playfully.

Du Ruo smiled, stood up, chose a place with a wide field of vision, and set up the drawing board.

The red lotus lay down for a while, and saw that Du Ruo was very attentive to painting, and unconsciously approached with a hint of a smile, looking at Du Ruo just inconspicuously painted countless messy colors on a piece of white cloth, and couldn't help but be happy again, Gu Zi sang a little song, and picked flowers all over the hillside. When she jumped up and down with a large handful of red, green, and green wildflowers, returned to Du Ruo's side, and glanced at the canvas that was gradually contouring, a burst of inexplicable excitement could not help but make her tiptoe closer, and her eyes flashed with surprise and joy.

Du Ruo smiled back, bowed down and added a few more strokes to the canvas, and grabbed the body of the red lotus that was about to escape. Red Lotus smiled charmingly, fell delicately on Du Ruo's shoulder, and stuffed all the wild flowers into Du Ruo's nose.

Du Ruo lowered his head and sniffed, then took a deep breath with humor, and sniffled as if he was in a matter, looked at Honglian's smiling face, and shook his head solemnly, "Well, it's not fragrant!" ”

Red Lotus was so angry that she straightened up, shrunk the flower to the side of her nose, sniffed the strong fragrance, and then raised her head with a smile, and looked at Du Ruo with a soft and strange charm.

Du Ruo grinned, a few stilted looks flashed in his mysterious eyes, and he hugged the red lotus to his chest in a strange way, leaned over and kissed the red lotus's delicate hair, and then leaned against the root of the red lotus's ears with relish, "The wild flowers are fragrant!" ”

"Ouch, I'm going to die!" Honglian screamed coquettishly, gently stabbed Du Ruo with her elbow, and then buried her face between her palms in embarrassment, while twisting her body in Du Ruo's arms again and again.

Du Ruo smiled happily, full of a sincere kindness and affection, picked up the red lotus, walked to the sunny pine tree and lay down. The sun shone warmly on the mountains, the wind whispered softly, and the cool air filled the air with the fragrance of wildflowers.

Honglian suddenly turned over and lay on Du Ruo's chest, shyly raised a pair of crescent-like eyebrows, and her radiant eyes were full of tenderness and sweetness, "Brother Ruo, I'm so happy!" ”

Du Ruo was excited, and hurriedly reached out to hold the hand of the red lotus stroking his chest buckle, and hugged the red lotus by his side, looking at the red lotus was shy, childishly half-closed eyes, slender eyelashes reflected the mottled light and shadow in the forest, and gently shook a few times. Du Ruo only felt a warm current rushing into his heart, as if incomparable happiness embraced him, and a feeling of affection that was as good as he could have made him close his eyes meaningfully and breathe a long sigh of relief. At the beginning of a year, there is a spring, there is no centenarian person at the age of 100, why should people live in the world to deceive themselves, waste their lives and emotions for some imaginary ideals and absurd beliefs, follow their own living environment, follow the crowd, be willing to eat, wear beautiful clothes, live in peace, enjoy their customs, honestly do their own work, and then hold a family business, have a love. Du Ruo's pursuit of art does not have the same surname of the living organism and the objective environment in terms of social consciousness, nor does it have the superior surname of natural selection between individuals and populations in terms of physiology and genetics. So why hang yourself on a tree, the east is not bright and the west is bright, the south is dark and there is the north, since you can't be a painter, you can't go to the city, you can't find a young girl surname, you have been called Master Du and Brother Ruo all your life, isn't it also very interesting, isn't it also a kind of personal value orientation of achievement motivation role cognition in the social environment. Since ancient times, cherishing flowers must get up early, who is willing to see flowers late, never folding flowers and mustaches, who is willing to love empty branches. married with the red lotus, fell in love with the red lotus, and accompanied the red lotus to complete the road of life. Why don't you have to get along with yourself, and if you can't eat grapes, you can't learn such a sweet lemon psychology that grapes are sour!

"Brother Ruo, what are you thinking, and you are thinking about the beauty in your city?" Honglian quietly opened her eyes at some point, and saw that Du Ruo's face showed several different expressions in an instant, and she couldn't help but raise her head with a hippie smile, and her dark eyes were full of playful and joyful expressions.

Du Ruo smiled shyly and mockingly, bowed her fingers to the red lotus's nose, leaned over and sat up against the tree, and put the red lotus on her lap with her sideways, "What do you want her to do, she has long left no trace in my heart, but she has sent books a few times and asked someone to bring a few paintings." But seriously, I am still grateful to her, although she has suffered all the hardships and lost face, and she is still a bamboo basket to draw water, but people must always have a little gratitude, and know how to drink water and think about the source, otherwise how can I have the ability to ask you to be the boss, the business is doing well, so you are also stained with her light, and you can't laugh at her at every turn and make fun of her. I don't know how she has been in the city in the past two years, or has she lived alone with her son? ”

"If she wants another letter, she will reply to the letter, and if she needs money, she will send her some money, it is difficult for you to remember her so much, I am afraid that she will forget you a long time ago, there are many rights and wrongs in front of the widow's door!" Red Lotus smiled secretly, and a wrinkle of concern or sarcasm appeared at the corner of her mouth.

"Alas, what do you do with her, no matter how good she is, to me she is just Chang'e in the moon, out of reach; No matter how bad it is, it's just the white lady in the Leifeng Tower, we can't worry about it and don't worry! Du Ruo smiled, waved his arm as if he wanted to drive away a nightmare, and stared at the red lotus with his eyes, "The work area is calling again, and I have to go back to work with the little evil skin, otherwise I will be fired." What do you think, anyway, I don't want to go back to work anymore, so let them be fired, the unit is just a symbol for me, I have worked hard for nearly ten years, and I have not gained any benefits. In the eyes of the leader, at best, it is a number of people, this time we have made money, maybe it is a pink eye, then I remembered that my number is also a talent, and said that I want to give full play to my strengths, and even play an official tone, our career still needs people like you, it's really funny! ”

"Then go to work, the railway is not your leader to repair, he is not like a dog to obey the call of his superiors, guilty of being like him, you think about whether you do things for a month or not, there is always money to get, where to find the good thing of pie in the sky, besides, you are serious 800 top jobs to work, and you did not go to the back door to support him, this iron rice bowl that was finally served can't just be thrown away!" Red Lotus raised her eyebrows, straightened up with a stern face, and her scorching gaze stared at Du Ruo's face without hesitation.

"What kind of business to do, this is just the beginning, you won't watch too many Hong Kong films, you've been brainwashed! Where to find this good thing that can come to money with a wave of your hands! Du Ruo was shocked when he heard this, and sat up, his eyes staring at the red lotus, and the palm holding her waist couldn't help but tremble.

"What do you say, you are really a piece of wood, your job is exchanged for your father's life, no matter how bad it is, you also work in a railway unit, and you don't have to worry about food all year round, if you are fired from the unit, what do you do? Returning to his hometown to farm, now the rural fields are distributed to each family, and there is no piece of land; Survive by painting, the national policy changes day by day, and the tax is collected so badly, and then you have to crack down on speculation, and you have to lose all the money you make, and then the family will drink the northwest wind with you! Besides, doing this for more than half a year, delaying me a lot of time, surnamed Suo closed the door to rest, you all went to work, I stayed in Shenzhen, reviewed while guarding the store, and had time to read more books and be admitted to university next year! Red Lotus turned her face in annoyance, and lowered her neck in frustration, her frustration lingering over her entire brow.

"Okay, okay, you're the boss, you have the final say, go to work, I'm most afraid of seeing your yin or yang face. It's just that it's so far away, it's rare to see each other for ten days and a half months, and I'm left alone to face the empty railway line and empty room all day long. Du Ruo's heart softened, and he blurted out insincere words.

"What are you afraid of! Are you afraid of living like the Cowherd and Weaver Girl, or are you afraid that I will be like Du Lanxiang, and a young boy will take me to the immortals! Red Lotus raised her eyebrows, playfully stretched out her hand to hang on Du Ruo's neck, face to face flashing with wise but amusing brilliance.

"Whether you ascend to immortal or go to university, in short, I am a red heart, two preparations. Ascension to immortals, I slapped my ass and left; I clap my hands to support the university entrance examination, and rural youth do not only have one way to take the university entrance examination! After passing the exam, he jumped the dragon gate, immediately transferred to the commercial grain account, and left the countryside for the rest of his life; If you don't get the test, you will return to your hometown to farm, and honestly repair the earth, so every year there will be thousands of troops and horses crowding the single-plank bridge. At that time, my teacher made a pair of leather shoes and a pair of straw sandals to hang in class, saying that if you are admitted to university, you will have leather shoes to wear, and if you can't get into college, you can only wear straw shoes! If my father hadn't died early, and my family would have had to come to the railroad to take a job, wouldn't I be like my classmates in my village studying on the other side of the ocean, why would I be almost thirty years old, and I can't say a daughter-in-law! Du Ruo sighed gloomily, closed his eyes uncomfortably, and choked up the words that he couldn't stop because of emotion.

"Really?" Honglian blinked her eyes happily, took a long breath, her face was full of happy smiles, and while leaning over and snuggling Du Ruo, she raised her hand and gently rubbed it on Du Ruo's shoulder, "Brother Ruo, you are so good!" ”

Du Ruo sighed slightly, and lay on his back on the grass, looking at the green pine branches above his head slowly swaying in the mountain wind, a few white clouds on the pine branches fluttering leisurely in the blue sky, and one or two spots of light through the branches slowly moved around the red lotus's body. Du Ruo felt a very familiar sadness hit his heart, and the sorrow of her insistence on going to school and the gloomy sorrow of her abandonment of the store made his face look like a wilted petal, and it took a while to ease his senses, and he reached out to comb the red lotus's hair flowing in the wind like a cover-up, and the words in his throat finally splashed out like a fountain.

"Red Lotus, you really don't want to open a store, you have to go to college! Haven't we made a lot of money in the past six months? Keep doing it, it's no better than going to college! As soon as you go to college, I have to wait for you for four years, and after four years, who knows what the outcome will be, and whether you will return to the mountains? Will you still look down on me, a road maintenance worker in the mountains? Maybe it's another wrong love song, a love that only blossoms and doesn't bear fruit. But I can't help but want you to go to college, and it would be too unfair to you to marry you at the age of study, and I don't have this great blessing! If my brother is actually quite pitiful, he has been like an ant on a hot pot for the past two years, looking for a partner back and forth, and he hasn't even found the shadow of an object, so it's hard to stick to you, and the marriage is two things, and I don't know which monkey year and horse month can achieve positive results. In my youth, I was like a dog in the mountains all day long, like a pig who could only eat a little in the trough, I want to change it, I want to get out of this pig and dog-like life, you know what others say, Du Painter who took the wrong medicine, Du Ruo, a drunken maniac, and Du Erpole carved at the bottom of the well, so that no woman likes me, and I am notorious like a pile of shit, can I really be such a bastard, to put it bluntly, it's not because I don't want to live a mediocre life in the mountains, with a dream, I want to go to the city on my own and eat a bowl of rice under one roof. Think about it, how good life is in the city, there are parks, shopping malls, film and television cities, libraries if you want to study, universities if you want to study, and exhibition halls if you want to paint. How can people in the city have these bright and green material enjoyment, there are these spiritual pleasures, we can only say that we are out and done, said to fall and rest, sharpened the head and squeezed on the noble road, can only have a top hat to wear, cut off the toes to run on the rich road, but there are a pair of rotten straw sandals to wear, people also say that you are cheap, a stinky pig's head and a rotten nose hillbilly, restless, blind toss, have never seen the world. However, there is no permanent family, there is no fixed door for blessings, people are counted as heaven, and the Tao is in virtue. Could it be that the people in the city are really amazing, superior to others, and the eldest son born to the eldest mother. Isn't it just that the fetus is good, highly educated, and has a good unit with a mixed face? Since we have cast the wrong baby and the unit is not good, we should always read more books, otherwise we will really look down on ourselves, and it is natural for us to go away for the rest of our lives. And this is also taboo! If I don't have so many ideas, I don't have so much heart, if I go to work like everyone else and just go to the mess point, build the square city after work, and go to the city from time to time to dash a few tickets, then your brother will be a big good person, and you can also eat enough and have nothing to do to slander others. You see that I have read enough books, and I still look like a cultural person who understands honor and disgrace and knows advance and retreat, but others don't see it that way. What is Du Erpole doing when he buys so many books, he hasn't graduated from junior high school yet, and he is like a person in the school city who is mixed and elegant! ”

Red Lotus smiled, pretending to understand whether she knew or not, lowered her eyebrows, got up and sat beside Du Ruo, while slowly piling up the wildflowers on Du Ruo's body, "Who said that, really!" ”

"Red Lotus. Tell me, if my brother is okay, talk about talent, talk about demeanor, talk about deeds, no worse than others, why do others arrive at the age of thirty, their wives and children are harmonious and beautiful, and my wife is still from the city beautifully, and I am almost half of the ground, my wife is not settled, my son has no hope, but I am still a bachelor! ”

"Look at you, crush all my flowers!" Red Lotus frowned in annoyance, threw all the broken petals on the ground, and turned away in displeasure. However, looking at Du Ruo's sighing expression that didn't seem to be contrived, there was a layer of discouragement and disappointment between his eyebrows, and a trace of pity couldn't help but rise in his heart, and he hurriedly turned sideways and fell beside Du Ruo, opening a pair of eyes that were as bright as autumn water, staring at Du Ruo with tenderness and shame, "Brother Ruo, why do you have to think so much, who wants to laugh at you Sha, a piece of sky on everyone's head, a piece of ground under everyone's feet, you are your life, others have other people's lives, You always like to impose your ideas on other people's heads, you like to paint, others like to go to the city to play, what's wrong with this, others marry a city wife, you also envy it, why do you say you want to marry me. You seem to have worked hard, you have struggled, you have suffered more than others, you should be higher than others around you, and the beautiful woman in the city will marry you first, this idea is too vulgar! There is a saying in our mountains, no matter how bright the moonlight is, the grain will not be dry, no matter how big the slap is, no matter how big the coat is, no matter how big the clothes are under the rain, no matter how high a person's ability is to leave the society, it is a dead end, you have to eat, to wear, to use, to have a social reference that shows your ability, you are not bound to be self-contained, happy to know your fate, you are not upright, you live in peace, all day long in fantasy, wanton, all to achieve personal wishes for the ultimate goal, this is not good! You keep saying what bamboo canes and shoes, plum wives and cranes, and a cloud of smoke and rain Ren Pingsheng, but in your heart, you want to go to the city stupidly, life in the city is good, there are many beautiful women in the city, this will not work! Contrary to common sense, to put it mildly, it is outright individualism! Our teacher also said that value is determined by the socially necessary labor time, and the length of a person's labor time can never be used to determine the amount of value of a commodity. Moreover, since ancient times, there have been very few people who have achieved great careers by relying on personal struggle, and not all of them have lived a lifetime with Da Yu and Tu An. If brother, I know that you are a good person, with a good heart, do not make bad, and know how to be civilized and polite, not the kind of reckless and ruthless person who only wants to be merry and happy. I'm going to college, and you support it, and you don't even say a word of reproach! People's hearts are flesh and blood, and I will not leave you alone wherever I go! I don't want to, if you want to think about it again, I won't hurt you, let you blow the wind alone in this barren mountain and wilderness, if you catch a cold, I won't bother to wait for you......"

Du Ruo listened quietly, his face was spicy, and his heart was like an old tree that had experienced a cold and bitter summer and withered vines suddenly entered the spring of wind and rain, with both the bitterness and bitterness of being tortured by the years, and the indescribable sweetness and joy. Seeing that Honglian lowered her head slightly, her face was dripping with a layer of fine sweat due to nervousness and crampedness, and her eyes that seemed to be open and closed also showed a bright light due to emotional excitement. Du Ruo couldn't suppress the surging passion in his chest anymore, and jumped up from the grass at once, waved his arms to hug the red lotus, and stretched out his mouth to kiss the red lotus's slightly curved and red lips.

Honglian sneered, a cloud of shame suddenly rose on her face, and she hurriedly put her hand against Du Ruo's chest, while looking at Du Ruo's face whose breathing became very heavy in an instant with a hazy joy, "Brother Ruo, if you want to be a relative's family in the future, just order, don't be so anxious to catch it, it's scary!" Du Ruobei felt a fever on her face, embarrassed and couldn't help laughing, and suddenly lost her heart to kiss the red lotus, looking up at the red lotus is squinting, squirming the corners of her eyebrows with a smile, and a few crushed petals have been pasted on her black hair like silk, Du Ruo couldn't help but feel hot in her heart, so she reached out to brush it off for her.

Honglian waved her hair a little reservedly, slipped away, threw down a string of silver bells scattered in the winding sun, flew around the gurgling stream, and picked a bright little flower and inserted it on her sideburns, "Brother Ruo, it looks good, right?" ”

Du Ruo's heart was pounding, looking at the red lotus leaves flashing her eyes charmingly, the slender body and slim limbs stood by the turquoise stream, looking at the stream behind the red lotus reflecting the mountains on both sides, the clear stream showed a sparkling wave all the way, gurgling on the stone wall full of moss, looking at the hill above the head of the red lotus and the mountain peak higher than the hill, the white clouds fluttered leisurely in the middle of the sky, the pine color reflected each other on the rock wall, what a delicate and poetic painting, what a warm and glorious picture, that rhyme, that composition, It was full of the light and color of the theatrical surname. Giorgione's "Sleeping Venus", which is famous for depicting sweet female surnames, is not this kind of composition, and Ingres's "Spring", which is known for its noble and vulgar [***] art, is not also this kind of artistic conception. Even among the modernist painters, Matisse, who brought the expressive power of flat colors to the extreme, and Picasso, who broke the structure and spatial relationship of things with "Les Demoiselles d'Avignon", did not both win in the history of art with the image of a woman with bright lines and simple pictures. The glorious image of the female surname [***] and the poetic composition of natural scenery are always the theme of the enthusiastic eulogy of painting art......

Du Ruo suddenly felt a strong creative impulse, a flood of unprecedented inspiration rushing to his mind, and he couldn't stop rushing to the drawing board with excitement and eagerness. However, when he picked up the pen and opened the canvas, a kind of sadness hidden in the depths of his soul, a sudden decadence of years and no achievements, quickly hit his heart. What's the use of painting these Raushzi, no matter how good the painting is, you can't find a woman to marry, and no matter how well the painting sells, it can't win the heart of a woman. She is not about to leave, like a lark that has broken free from the fetters of a dead tree, spreading her wings towards the blue sky she loves, and dropping herself like a fly that has pinched off her head and melon seeds and circles the mountain. It's time to rein in the precipice, and waste the good time on it year after year, and the older you get, the more difficult it becomes; It's time to throw away the illusion, and then hesitantly lock the marriage partner on the ambiguous red lotus, and you have to waste a few years of time. Standing at thirty, men should get married, and people can't get married after thirty, how can they not become a social waste! Du Ruo couldn't help but smile indifferently at himself, and without thinking about it, he threw away the brush far away with a click.

Honglian was stunned for a moment, the smile on her face faded suddenly, she hurriedly ran back from the stream a few meters away, picked up the paintbrush, and looked at Du Ruo's face with a crushing face, and she couldn't help but approach with concern again, and asked in a trembling voice, "What's the matter, Brother Ruo-"

Du Ruo became more and more gloomy, took the brush from Honglian's hand, and without saying a word, turned his back and marked two scarlet "×" on the canvas that had a hint of it.

Honglian was taken aback, and when she heard that things had changed, she struggled to snatch the paintbrush from Du Ruo's hand, and stared at Du Ruo sternly with her innocent eyes, "Brother Ruo, the ruffian is coming up again, what the hell is wrong with you!" ”

Du Ruo was stunned when he heard this, and couldn't help but take a step back in a daze, looking at the red lotus Guli twisting her delicate cheeks strangely, and there were complex expressions between his eyebrows that seemed to be confused and uncertain, Du Ruo secretly sighed, and the fear of the red lotus could not be blamed for a thousand mistakes suddenly rose in his heart, but when he was young, a resentment of the marriage and the difficult time of the good day made his face tense in an instant, and his eyes became extremely sharp in discouragement and despair, and he pursed his lips with disdain, " Aren't you going to college, what's the point of me painting these pictures again, such a lucrative business is thrown away like garbage, I'm sticking to the back of your ass like two hundred and five, isn't it innocent to find shackles to wear, and besides, don't you want me to go back to the work area, and then I've been to the kind of people who are blinded and laughed at, so why catch a lice and crawl on your head, what kind of paintings, what, that's not right! ”

Honglian froze suddenly, and a sudden burst of anger made her face pale as if it had been solidified, looking at Du Ruo's cold and gloomy face, with a disgusting sneer hanging from the corners of her mouth, and suddenly felt a wisp of desolation rush into her nose, and the bottom of her heart seemed to suddenly press a sharp stone, and the indescribable pain was unbearable and unspeakable, and she couldn't help but turn around silently, and a chilling depression enveloped her whole body for a while.

"Why, I'm angry again, what do you want me to do, I paint, you have to go to college and sell it, I don't paint, you cry and ignore people with a sad face, you say, what do you want me to do!" Du Ruo restrained and restrained, and finally couldn't help but feel on fire, his eyebrows were tightly twisted together in an uncontrollable rage, and he suddenly jumped in front of Red Lotus like a nervous person.

"What can I want from you! How dare I ask you! You are so great, gold-inlaid character, who has offended you, shouting and screaming like a madman, and having the ability to shout at the beauties of your city! Don't think I don't know, you've struggled for so many years, you've worked hard for so many years, your ideal is not to marry a beautiful woman in the city! No wonder people call you Du Erpole, Du Maniac who took the wrong medicine, I don't think he wronged you at all! I just want to take the university entrance examination, change my fate with my own ability, I am a rural girl, I can't recruit a job, I can't go through the back door, I don't take the university entrance examination, how can there be a way out, I have to stay in the countryside for the rest of my life! He only knows how to be angry with me, to make evil, and to shake his might, and he is a man of that kind of person! The red lotus was also angry for a while, and the bitterness and humiliation that had been suppressed in her heart gushed out like a tide at this time, and a vicious and ugly expression swept over her face that was sparkling because of the harshness.

"Okay! If you have the ability to take the test, I didn't stop you, and I will whip you if you pass the test! Du Ruo's heart was sour, a gloomy mist rose all over his face, his throat and eyes were even more sour, and he even choked up his voice. It turns out that Honglian looks down on him at all, and she is like a long-tongued woman who often makes a little ugly thing about him in the past, is there still an emotional basis for raising eyebrows and respecting each other! Is this still the object of love that he loves with his heart and tries his best to protect! Du Ruo was dazed for a while, just like the ** that had been tormenting him in the depths of his heart in the past, he was suddenly exposed naked, a little self-respecting dignity and a little self-proclaimed Sven were swept away, and people suddenly seemed to collapse, with indescribable depression and decadence, "This is really a great insult, my highest ideal is to marry a beautiful woman in the city!" Du Ruo suddenly let out a burst of wild laughter, and the scenes of the past that had been forgotten in the corner of memory for a long time were also unbearable to look back on at this time, making him feel disheartened and shaking his body, and walking crookedly all the way to the top of the mountain.

Honglian was taken aback, and hurriedly grabbed his sleeve hard. Du Ruo shook his head nonchalantly, his face spasmed strangely, and then burst into tears silently.

The red lotus was in a dilemma with Du Ruo, panicked and chaotic like a rabbit in his heart, and saw the sun gradually disappear in the green micro on the other side of the peak, and the mist around him quickly spread, and the gusts of mountain wind shook the mountains and forests, making a chaotic and sharp howl, which made her feel like a thorn in her back, and she suddenly gave birth to a pinprick-like chill.

Red Lotus perched in a panic and followed over a mountain, her heart was stubborn and stubborn, and her stubbornness and stubbornness had long been gone, she suddenly found that she was very weak, very ordinary, and an infatuation did not change, so that she was so confused and helpless, she turned her head from time to time to look at the sunset that the peak was about to sink, she really wanted to cry out loud, and wanted to scold herself obediently, guilt and extreme disgust were also tormenting her, she couldn't help but twitch her nose aggrieved and aggrieved, and Qingying's tears were full of desire," Brother Ruo, let's go back—"

Du Ruo subconsciously said "um", stood up in a trance, and stared at the red lotus as if he didn't know, but after a while, he frowned again, and a wave of anger came from contempt and hatred in his heart, as if the lost reason returned to his mind, and suddenly an unspoken sense of shame and an undoubted self-esteem made him push the red lotus away violently, and his face instantly rioted with a perverse and fierce look, "What are you still doing with me!" Let's go! I, Du Ruo, am a stone roll in a muddy field, I can't turn over for a lifetime, a straw rope is a trouser belt, and I don't need you to be pitiful. Didn't you say that my highest dream was to marry a beautiful woman from the city? Are you? You don't pee on yourself, you look at your virtue, rustic, unkempt, and dressed like a child. If you go to Yuexi to meet the Yue girl, the white lotus blooms in the red lotus pond, hehe, only I am blind, and you are a good and pure red lotus! ”

"If brother——, don't do this! Count me as shallow and said the wrong thing, I'm sorry for you, it's not okay! Red Lotus felt a tingling pain in her heart, as if she had been forced into a corner, and she was stunned for a moment, her eyebrows were filled with gloom, and the humiliation and despair of shame and regret also forced her for a while.

Du Ruo was even more angry, an unforgettable disgust and a strong disgust for the red lotus filled his entire heart, and then he wrung his eyebrows coldly, staring at the red lotus's face that looked like he was in fear, "Hehe, joke, how can you be sorry for me, you are too worthy of me." I look at your face all the time, you have to go to university, I don't have a word of complaint; You're going to lose your business, I didn't say a word. But you can't look down on me, spit in my face at will, you think I, Du Ruo, am an honest, spurned, pitiful and disgusting master. It's just a stupid pig, I don't know what to do, the dog bites Lu Dongbin, and I don't recognize the real person with my eyes. I'm a scumbag, inaction, indisputable, others hit my left cheek, I will still stretch up the right cheek, isn't it just a slap in the face, what's the big deal! The Bada Mountain people are trampling on the market, tearing the monk's clothes and throwing them into the fire, picking up dung and chewing in the mouth, which is not admired by all generations; Mi Fu saw the boulder ugly, 'this is enough to be my worship', that is, with a crown, called a brother, not also famous. I don't dare to say that there is also a kind of emptiness and painful madness of the literati, but if I use it, I will do it, and if I give it up, I will hide it, since I am full of poetry and books, and I am forced by the environment to make a difference, so why should I retreat and be alone. Saying that my highest ideal is to marry a beautiful woman in the city, I really know me too well, I like beautiful women, you don't see, I am posted on the cabinet, hung on the wall, painted on the book, are all women with bare butts and big tits, but this is a typical example of human beauty, understand, is the aesthetic synaesthesia of human beings! Women are born to give birth, so the fat buttocks are beautiful from generation to generation, and women have to raise children, so there is a breast worship in the next generation! The students of the Academy of Fine Arts do not all complete their artistic studies through [***] assignments. I'm almost 30 years old, I haven't talked about my girlfriend, I haven't even seen what a woman looks like when she sleeps in bed, and I don't know any secret female surname experience, so what else do I paint, then my pursuit of art in the past few years has become child's play. Tell you, Honglian, let's open the window and say bright words, I love you, I love you unforgettablely, you have almost shaken my principles of being a man, you have made me understand a lot of principles of being a man. I don't think I can live up to your youth, I don't think I can despise your pity, I want to be good to you with a heart, and live a lifetime with you, but I didn't expect you to step on the threshold with one foot, don't know how to advance or retreat, and laugh at me like those long-tongued women who are tongue-pickers! There will be times when the wind and waves will be long, and one day I will realize my dreams, and one day I will get what I have worked for. Since we don't have a common language, like a broken basin and a broken bowl, we can't get together at all, and since you look down on me at all, then what's the point of love! It just so happens that you are going to college and have been to your sunny day, and I want to go back to the work area to be a road maintenance worker that I can't see the sky, so you take your sunny road, and I will cross my single-plank bridge. Break up as soon as possible, cut it in two, and you're leaving! Let's go! ——”

"Brother Ruo - what are you doing! Who is going to break up with you, you are always nervous, talking nonsense with your eyes open! Red Lotus suddenly shook violently, let out a long moan, and her eyes were filled with tears at once.

"Who is your brother? Don't wear flowers on your feet and neck, it's not a beautiful place, stick a flat arm in your crotch, and raise yourself. You're not young, pretty, and knowledgeable, go to your Prince Charming! I have two poles, I took the wrong medicine, you didn't see it, I am half a person who has been in the ground, and the blessings that come will be dissipated by people like you who are piled up with flowers and bones, not to mention that we have not grown this artemisia on the ancestral grave of Du Erpole, even if I was a monk in my previous life, I burned incense for a lifetime, and read Buddha for a lifetime, I am afraid that I will not have this flying blessing! Let's go! Why tear your skin and make each other unhappy? Like me, shitting and sneezing, carrying a bag at both ends, pretending to be a king and kicking a nest under the soles of people's feet, what else is worth your nostalgia! Let's go! You let me go! ”

Honglian was stunned for a while, her heart seemed to be burning like a raging fire, and her face turned purple with anger, and she screamed hoarsely as if she had eaten arsenic, and waved her fist at herself viciously. Honglian first lowered her head tiredly, her lips trembled silently, and a kind of unladylike sorrow and a kind of sadness of being fortunate filled in her heart. Then she closed her eyes slightly, her tear-stained cheeks twitched pitifully, her legs seemed to be rooted in too much bitterness and loneliness, and the overwhelming despair completely destroyed her. Later, she resolutely raised her head again, like a creature that had broken through the cobwebs, her face was filled with indescribable brilliance, her eyebrows were overjoyed and cheerful, and a feeling of breaking away from the sea of bitterness swept through her chest, and the corners of her mouth, which had been spasmodic, involuntarily alternately appeared a little serene and a little relaxed pleasure, "If brother, you have committed enough coma, the clay man still has a local surname, you treat me like this, one day, you will regret it!" After speaking, he stretched out his hand to wipe the wet tears on his face, and stumbled out towards the sunset mountain road below the peak......

You are gone, with disappointment and sadness; I'm gone, too, slowly soaking away a little bit of love in disappointment and sadness. Red Lotus, if we never see each other from now on, if from now on I am also like a subject of the two-faced country, the front is "pleasant, humble and lovely", the negative side is "rat eyes and eagle nose, tongue like a steel knife", then maybe the tragedy of life will not befall you and me so much, if I am also like Luling Yizi, the Tao through Peng Ze, all the boat into the lake, seeking to get the wish, then we may really be able to live a few days of poor couples, but also can enjoy a few days of happiness for men and women weaving......

Du Ruo came back from the mountains in obsession, and the sky was already dark. The faint outline of the small station protrudes in black and suddenly on the forest belt of the mountain beams, the wind blows the rustle of the trees, it is not the red lotus that follows, the footsteps are fine, and the desire to go stops; The scattered lights in the work area are swept out of the faint bright color by the wind, looking at the shadow of the tree in the distance, the branches and leaves are draped, this style is like a red lotus, every time the new moon rises out of the East Ridge, the red lotus always likes to spread out the hair on the head, standing in the mountain shadow and moonlight, throwing a string of silver bells broken in the clear light, let the wind caress the moon love, graceful and colorful......

Du Ruo returned home in a daze, the house was deserted, the dark shadows of the mountain beams were staggered on the four walls, and the wilted and dry chirping of insects outside the window came for a while, which made his heart even more empty. Du Ruo reluctantly restrained himself from pacing in the room for a few steps, and cursed himself in a sullen voice, then fell on the sofa, and the flower-like smile of the red lotus and the jade-like demeanor appeared in front of him again.

Du Ruoxing shook his head like a wooden, and his two wooden eyes looked out of the window in distraction. In the past years, Du Ruo's fate was difficult, and even more unfortunate was that he had a pretentious heart that could not be ordinary in ordinary years. A person who is difficult to save his face in the surrounding living environment will naturally have no chance of love and marriage, whose good girl is willing to be said to be a white egg that cannot be taken out of the old eagle's nest under the moon, and it is a beautiful eyebrow to show the blind, not to mention the physiological characteristics, cultural quality, and socioeconomic status have an impact on the choice of surname and love, and even a little bit of heart is hazy, and the romantic interest is also hazy. However, Du Ruo feels good about himself, and he is also good at what he does, although he still has no regrets after nine deaths, isn't it just a squirt, a narrow shoulder, wide crotch and crotch animal, do not have some love with Du Ruo, so that Du Ruo's energy and enthusiasm have a place to vent, Du Ruo is still too lazy to love, as the saying goes, the chicken does not nod the phoenix nods, and the cow does not happen and the horse does not happen. However, more often, Du Ruo's heart was gloomy, and he watched the marriage of the same age as himself, who usually doesn't look down on him, and his wife was still a little touching, and after marriage, it was the child's father who was with him. Du Ruo is discouraged, melancholy, and compassionate: he believes that the current social consciousness is a kind of historical lazy power, a roadblock on the road to individual freedom, and people's habits and surnames are still only stuck in the non-moral judgment of obeying the elders in the small-scale peasant economy to abide by the traditional contentment. If Du wants to fully stretch his surname, fully realize himself, and transform his inner creativity into external material and spiritual wealth, he will inevitably go against the two laws of social consciousness. So people called him a Du madman who took the wrong medicine, and a Du painter who carved flowers at the bottom of the well, which is very reasonable; People who are half-cut into the ground don't even see what a woman looks like when she sleeps in bed, and it's just a critical mindset of the social value system about social roles. So Du Ruo wanted to open it, and he had the courage to throw away all the traditions, dignity, and social public opinion that oppressed the soul, and continued to enjoy his fun of creating life, and continued to do his colorful dream of "debuting on the dragon and tiger list in one fell swoop and reaching the phoenix pool in ten years". Just as a dilapidated temple is still a temple, so a toppled icon is still a god......

"Wrong, everything is wrong, you fool!" Du Ruohuo got up from the sofa, subconsciously paced a few steps in the room, and walked ignorantly from the window to the door, and from the door to the window, muttering as if playing a double reed, "What about your good hopes?" What about your lofty ideals? Aren't you a bard in the mountains rather than a thief in the city? You are so high, you are so arrogant, you are so unearthly, how can you even look down on a woman in the mountains! It's time to wake up, fool! Don't you know that the pursuit of the surname is closely related to the pursuit of happiness, you don't say that hardship is just a means, and happiness in life is the goal! Isn't your left and right inscription a flower to drink wine, and you don't go upstairs without a moon! If you continue to eat the ancients like this, obsessively do not come to your senses, cling to the gourd without opening the petals, and stubbornly guarding the granite head without opening the mind, then the poor and destitute will be just behind you, maybe it will really be like an abandoned terracotta figurine, and you will never be able to get out of the mountain for a lifetime! ”

For more than ten years, Du Ruo's happy life has passed between desire and desire, Du Ruo's happy life is thrown between pain and emptiness and boredom, a little favorite hope to maintain Du Ruo's behavioral consciousness, and the most brilliant dream to guide Du Ruo's ideological foundation are all wrong now! For more than ten years, Du Ruo sacrificed his youth and love, and ruined his reputation and dignity for the sake of these favorite hopes and most brilliant dreams, just so that one day because of this sacrifice and destruction, he could leave the cramped living environment in the mountains, and stay away from the poor years in the mountains that wore out people's will, so that he could be like a city man who has a place to stretch his surname eight hours away, and hunt for more freedom of personal emotional life in a broader world. And now it's all wrong! Du Ruo thinks that as long as he steps on iron shoes, wears iron inkstones, travels thousands of miles, reads thousands of books, and trains himself to be full of poetry and books, erudite and versatile, the society will one day let him dedicate his wisdom and talent due to the evolution of the times. Du Ruo believes that people's high socioeconomic status can improve the value of love, and the superior living standard and comfortable lifestyle provided by the man must have a realistic superposition effect on the surname of the female surname, but Honglian just abandoned him! There is nothing in the world that is more heartbreaking than this self-deception of oneself, and there is nothing in the world that is more heartbreaking than this oneself-setting misunderstanding in life!

Du Ruo smiled bitterly, his lips twitched slightly, and he walked to the door crookedly, looking at the row of magnificent bookcases on the opposite wall, and at the beautifully framed oil paintings hanging on the four walls. That's what art is called! All of Du Ruo's misfortunes, famines, and ups and downs in the world are brought about by these unlucky things, and it is these unlucky things that make him boast of his father and the fallacy of others, and now it is difficult to distinguish whether he is a human or a beast! For a while, Du Ruo felt ashamed that he had sacrificed his youth and love so much for these things in the past, and felt ashamed that he had ruined his reputation and dignity in the past and was so intoxicated with these things! For a moment he even hated these things, and in a trance, it was as if he had entered a strange world, and all these things on the four walls had turned into some kind of hideous and ferocious monster that was viciously squeezing him, and Du Ruo ran to the door of the house as if he had fled, and then a deep contempt and contempt for these things flashed through his mind. Du Ruo no longer wants to use his youth and love to show his devotion to these things, and Du Ruo is no longer willing to use his reputation and dignity to show his obedience to these things!

Du Ruo finally couldn't bear it anymore, picked up the mop on the side of the door, crackled and beat all over the room, the inkstone, rice paper, and paintbrush on the table were scattered all over the ground, and the plaster statues, Tang Sancai, and hanging scroll paintings in the bookcase were smashed to pieces. Then Du Ruo burst into hysterical laughter, rejoicing that he had finally been able to banish these things from the depths of his soul, and that he would never have to have to bother with them again. However, it didn't take long for him to cry inexplicably, as if he had swallowed a hairy apricot, as if he had eaten a green walnut, and as if he had eaten a broken root grass, he was not ashamed to feel ashamed. He first cried very suppressed, with a strange look on his face that he had suffered misfortune and vaguely had a few aftermath of life, and then he cried very unbridledly, muttering the name of the red lotus in his mouth, and then he cried very aggrievedly, and sat down on the sofa, staring blankly at the broken objects swaying with a dark halo on the ground, and the tears flowed down the twisted muscles of his face, and dripped all the way to the books or picture albums that he called these things that were spread out or warped around him......

The night is deep, the dark sky outside the window has been transformed into a purple bright color, the stars shine through a few flying clouds like scales and close to the peaks, and the mountains and forests that are hidden by the night and shaken by the wind also begin to show a clear outline in the night darkness, from time to time there are a few withered leaves falling from the closed window lattice, which makes the night deeper and quieter, and the surroundings are silent.

Du Ruo let out a lazy sigh and closed his eyes listlessly, his skull buzzing like a swarm of bees gathered in a nest. At this moment, there was a slight sound in the room, followed by a very small sigh. Du Ruo's whole body was excited, his heart was pounding, he ran to the bedroom in three or two steps, snapped and turned on the bedside lamp, through the thick mosquito net, Honglian was squinting his eyes, curling up on the side of the bed in fear, the eyelashes that were like long curtains closed violently shook twice, and then slowly soaked out two crystal teardrops.

Du Ruo was surprised and delighted for a moment, a huge joy, so that the blood of his whole body boiled, but in an instant, a heart-wrenching pain firmly grabbed him, and his thoughts surged like a dark and boundless water current, which made him suddenly feel a bang in his head, and he couldn't help but kneel in front of the bed, and his hands tightly grasped Honglian's hand stretched out outside the quilt, and grasped his weeping and rippling face, "Honglian, if my brother is sorry for you!" ”

The red lotus shrank all over her body, and a regenerative warm current permeated her body, and the person suddenly woke up from the state of numb and sluggish grief. She wanted to pull her hand away, slap him hard, push him away, and then walk away, but look at Du Ruo's undisguised mourning demeanor, undisguised pain, the old brutality of being angry with her, doing evil to her, and pouring dirty water on her is gone. Honglian felt a hazy longing for love in her heart, a sincere yearning for love, happiness and a happy marriage, and like a vague mist swirling in front of her, she couldn't help but pounce on Du Ruo's shoulder, with an unaccustomed nervous and fearful excitement, and gently rubbed her tearful face on Du Ruo's shoulder.

"If brother, Red Lotus likes you, I want you to like Red Lotus too, Red Lotus can indeed feel that life can't live without you. Red Lotus misses you all the time and wants to be with you all the time, but Red Lotus is extremely afraid of being with you, and sometimes even feels very tired of being with you. Red Lotus can't tell the mystery here, maybe you understand this better. Red Lotus can only soak in lovesickness every time, looking forward to seeing each other, but every time we meet, it can't bring me joy. The red lotus is very painful, and the red lotus often looks forward to a happy life in the future, and whenever we walk together, I wonder if we will be truly happy in the future. Maybe I'm a bad mountain girl who demands too much from you! From now on, Red Lotus will no longer think about it, and entrust her love to you wholeheartedly, and Red Lotus will be a good wife, trying her best to dispel the shadow that hangs over you, so that you can devote yourself to painting your paintings. It's really not ashamed, and I haven't even seen a woman's body. What does painting have to do with a woman's body? Brother Ruo, you can paint, you don't know that Red Lotus likes knowledgeable and educated people! You paint, Honglian shows you the body, our grandmother said that a man will only love a woman with all his heart after seeing her body! ……”

Du Ruo's heart suddenly swayed, and a wisp of excitement from the heart jumped on his eyebrows, and his whole body was immersed in a rich joy. Looking at the red lotus washed by the tears of the clear and beautiful white face without the slightest earthly dirt, looking at the red lotus drunk in the long love and looking like the crescent moon as bright eyes, Du Ruo is like the red lotus has turned into a fairy, in front of her she is like a lotus flower on the surface of the moonlit pool, with the cold dew on her shoulders, and the warm breeze in her arms, the whole body is so elegant, so clean, and so bright, full of freshly baked extraordinary charm......

Du Ruo couldn't help but hug the red lotus, and put his face tightly on the soft and plump breasts of the red lotus, for a while Du Ruo felt that it was sticking to a round of hot sun, the milk peaks of the red lotus's garden, the low milk valley, like the sun, bright and warm around him, how warm, how quiet, and how comforting. Du Ruo suddenly felt his lips twitch, and a few tears of excitement overflowed in his eyes. He lifted the quilt little by little, and the red lotus was only lying on the bed with a thin quilt on his body, and his face was as white as the snow in the distant mountains in winter, which was dazzling [***], Du Ruo felt that his eyes were straight for a while, and his heart seemed to have countless ants crawling. Look at the forehead of the red lotus that is as bright as spring water, the eyebrows that are as green as the spring mountains, the gentle drooping eyelids of the red lotus, the beautiful and neat lips, the delicate and convex curves of the red lotus's chest and buttocks, and the crystal-like transparency that fills the whole body. Du Ruo only felt that every nerve fiber in his body was excited, the heat wave in his heart began to flow, and the chaotic reverie, wishes, and emotions in his mind came to naught, a hidden ** from the dantian, a long-suppressed painful expectation mixed with too much longing and hope, which couldn't help but make him gasp like a bull in heat. He pressed the red lotus tightly to his chest, and his face was flushed with a few bits from the eagerness. However, it didn't take long for him to wake up from his frenzy, and he had no doubt about the guilt of the rules and virtues that had sprung up from there, and the terrible thought that a deep-seated contact with his loved one would lead to the destruction of true love. He barely managed to restrain his trembling body, and he could hear his heartbeat, and he could see the look on his face in the mirror. Look at the red lotus shyly drooping her long eyelashes, her face was instantly filled with the red glow burned by excitement, she was so delicate and seductive, and her heart couldn't help but be stunned again, tenderness and honey quickly floated up, and the calm slowly returned to her heart......

"Don't ...... Other...... If brother! I'm afraid—"

The moon has passed in the middle of the sky, the moonlit night of the small station is extraordinarily quiet, as if everything is intoxicated in the caress of the moonlight, the tall glass window lattice can see the mist on the opposite hill in the reluctant kiss of the green mountain, a few wandering stars suddenly seem to be unable to bear the loneliness of the cocoon, one by one blinked to the house, under the eaves a bird perched in the shade of the tree also seems to be infected by some kind of infection, from time to time flapping its wings, making one or two courtship chirps.

Du Ruowei leaned over and kissed Honglian's chest, neck and cheeks over and over again, sometimes he looked strong and domineering, and put his mouth tightly on Honglian's lips, so that Honglian moved "hmm", sometimes he looked gentle and dear, and bit Honglian's earlobes and nose lightly, so that Honglian couldn't help but shout softly, stretched his eyebrows and eyes, and let out a series of excited funny moans.

Red Lotus lay lazily on the bed, at the mercy of Du Ruo's fiery exhalation and overwhelmed hands, enduring vague pain and vaguely realized humiliation to accommodate Du Ruo's every movement......

After that, it was a strong conquest with a barbaric caste......

Du Ruo faintly felt that Honglian was a little unwilling to give in and a little flustered, but this resistance further strengthened his desire. Du Ruo suddenly felt that he was walking in the fairyland, surrounded by faint green mountains, low and faint green water, the flowers pulled the joy and floated out the most beautiful smile, the grass danced with waist branches and danced the most beautiful dance, the wind blew away the dirt on his journey, the rain washed out a fresh world, and gave him the most beautiful mood and the most joyful emotions. Du Ruo felt that he was a hero walking through the swamp, looking back at the vast grassland, the dark clouds raging against the sky, and the wind carrying the raindrops violently shaking the grass and trees......

Du Ruo has finally gone through ups and downs and can breathe the free air of the world; Du Ruo finally went through humanity and walked into the most beautiful season of love on the road of life. He can enjoy the pleasures, the happiness, the physical and mental pleasures that people can enjoy; The fame, fortune, and social status that people can't enjoy, he can enjoy now. Who said, the infinite past is the end of the present, the infinite future is the beginning of the present, the present is the critical point between a mediocre man and a sage, the present philosophy of a mediocre is to go with the flow, and the present philosophy of a sage is to struggle, to pursue, to endure more suffering......

"You...... You're so faint! What will you do in the future—"

"Don't ...... Other! Red Lotus, my dear! I will always remember this evening! This life and this life will not live up to you! My dearest person in this world is you, I must listen to your words, and then paint, use my brush to knock on the palace of art, so that you, me, and our children will never stay in this ravine for a lifetime, and will borrow a piece of water and soil in the city, support a piece of blue sky, and enjoy the happiness of life at a high level! Thank you, dear! ”