Zhang Taiping was lying on the bed with empty eyes, and the white checkered ceiling seemed to reflect the smiling but pitiful face again. The girl's name is Zhang Xiaowei, oh, she can't be called a girl anymore, because she married a woman five years ago, and even her daughter is four years old, and their ending is not that the girl loves vanity, dislikes the poor and loves the rich, and is unfaithful to love, but is full of too much helplessness and providence, which has to start with Zhang Taiping's life experience.

Zhang Taiping grew up in an orphanage, and he didn't know who his parents were. I just heard Grandma Zhang, the oldest in the hospital, say that she was sent to the door of the orphanage on the night of the thirtieth night of the Chinese New Year's Eve in 82. At that time, he looked only about a year old, and his little face was red from the cold, but he didn't cry or scream, and he saw the small eyes of the person rolling around his bones. The neck is worn with fine linen silk and a jade pendant engraved with the word Taiping. Grandma Zhang believed in Buddhism, and at first glance, she felt that she was fated with her, and after looking at the jade pendant around his neck, she named her Taiping, and her surname was Zhang. The birth date is set at the thirtieth year of the Chinese New Year's Eve.

Zhang Taiping was raised by Grandma Zhang like her own grandson, and he was smart and clever since he was a child, but he was frail and sickly. Even with the special care of Grandma Zhang, who is the director, she is still thin and weak, just like the children in African refugee camps, and has been malnourished for a long time.

When he was twelve years old, Grandma Zhang died. It was not only a mental blow to him, but also a physical challenge. After Grandma Zhang left, he was in a state of hunger all day long, not because he was provided with less food, but because he always had to eat three or four times the food of children of the same age to feel full. Two hours later, the feeling of hunger would sweep over the body again.

When Grandma Zhang was alive, she also took him to the hospital for a few check-ups, but each time the result was that he was sick and healthy, but his blood sugar was a little low.

However, the blame is that no matter how much you eat, your stomach is always unsatisfied. It's like a bottomless pit, no matter what you fill in, it's still empty.

When he was in middle school, food was provided in the cafeteria, but fortunately he met a sympathetic aunt. Every time he eats, he always slowers himself for dozens of minutes than others, and then enters through the back door until he is full.

The stomach is full, but the emaciated body can't be changed, and there is even a tendency to develop towards the white bone essence, and going out late at night can always scare the person who has something in mind. The terrifying and terrible appearance is destined to not be recognized by his classmates. Poverty and suffering are the elixir of maturity. While other children are still looking for fun things to fill out their childhoods, he already knows that the opportunity to learn at school is not easy to come by. Because of the alienation and avoidance of his classmates, he devoted all his energy to studying. So the junior high school students all know that the first in the grade is a skeleton ghost!

The high school entrance examination score is among the best in the district, and he is admitted to a private high school for free, and there is a living allowance of 200 yuan per month.

The better news than his results is that his body has finally turned around, although he is still a pot-bellied king, but after a summer vacation, he finally has grown some flesh between his skin and bones, and he looks like a person anymore, and he is no longer as scary as before.

Life in high school was no different to him than in junior high school. After all, high school students are much more mature than junior high school students, and their likes and dislikes for a person are not as obvious as those of junior high school students, and there are people who are willing to socialize with him and hang out together. But the quiet and closed surname he cultivated in the three years of junior high school made him unable to integrate into laughter and extreme sports. Coupled with the maturity and hunger that far surpasses his peers, he can only be alone in the corner to study, study, and learn!

When I was a sophomore in high school, a girl who transferred to another school came. Her name is Zhang Xiaowei.

is very Rongxin, Zhang Taiping, who has always occupied the corner and sits alone, has become her tablemate.

The girl doesn't look amazing when she looks at it, but she is petite, and her apple-like round face shows two small dimples when she laughs, which makes her look particularly cute. The little nose is always wrinkled, adding a bit of lively atmosphere.

Girls who have just transferred to another school are not yet able to integrate into the various small circles that have been formed in the first year of high school. So when others were chatting or exercising, Zhang Taiping, who was still working hard, was fortunate to get the company of the girl and the curious eyes that glanced over from time to time.

Zhang Taiping and the girl started during a physical education class. Zhang Taiping clearly remembered that day was September 21 of '99.

On this day, the girl ate a large piece of ice cream at noon, and felt a pain in her stomach during physical education class in the afternoon. The girl who was a little sloppy remembered that you can't eat anything too cold during your menstrual period. The girl who felt that she had done her own evil had to take a leave of absence and go back to the classroom to rest.

Pushing open the classroom door, the girl was surprised by the table that was lying on the table. The girl thought curiously, "Won't he have a good friend too!" ”。

However, as she got closer, the girl heard a series of cooing sounds.

Naughty, she quietly crouched down on the bench to confirm that it was indeed from the stomach of her tablemate.

When I looked up, I saw a pale face covered in sweat.

"Are you hungry?" She asked softly.

Zhang Taiping didn't answer, just closed his eyes and bit his lip with his teeth.

The girl took out the snacks in her bag, pushed them to him and said, "Here you go." ”

Zhang Taiping still didn't move, but the sweat on his face dripped down his chin to the ground.

"Obedient, it's really not good for your health." The girl's voice was surprisingly soft.

This soft voice seemed to have magical power, and Zhang Taiping finally raised his head. Through the blurred vision, what greeted me was a pair of sincere and slightly pitiful bright eyes.

"Let's eat," the girl gave her a smile, two shallow dimples on her face.

Zhang Taiping, under the guidance of this heavenly sound, mechanically tore open the snack bag and put it in his mouth.

He didn't know if there were angels in this world, and he hadn't seen them before. However, at this moment, he believed, the angels were around.

Since then, the girl has brought two breakfasts a day, and there is always a whole bunch of snacks in the bag. They begin to get to know each other and then become friends.

For Zhang Taiping, the happiest two years have passed.

His results are always at the top. Although the girl has been improving with his help, there is still a distance from his results.

After the college entrance examination, while waiting for the results, the girl was obviously depressed and full of worries. He knew what the reason was, but he deliberately didn't ask, but secretly looked at the girl's volunteer form when filling out the volunteer, and said goodbye with a smile in the girl's weeping eyes. Then I got a job during the holidays and slowly waited for the moment to surprise the girl.

His first choice for college was Northwest Agriculture and Forestry, because he and the girl both liked this imperial capital full of historical vicissitudes and classical connotations. The main thing is that the girl's first choice is here.

Without any suspense, he arrived at the campus two days before the start of school, which may be about to witness their sweet time.

Taking advantage of the afterglow of surprises, their freshman year life is sweet and enviable.

However, God always seems to like to give people a thunderbolt on a sunny day, watching people's helplessness and pain and the sky clear.

In the summer vacation at the end of his freshman year, Zhang Taiping felt the hunger before high school again, even worse. It's like the ** who has just woken up from hibernation wants to eat, and the stomach is frantically absorbing the energy in the body. What's worse is that at this moment, it is not only the energy of the food in his stomach that is absorbed, but also his life force.

Some of the muscles that had been built up in the previous four years quickly dried up in a few dozen days. Every morning, there are a few more strands of gray hair on his head, and wrinkles on his skin.

He had thought about killing himself, but he couldn't do anything under the girl's silent pleas overflowing with tears.

Knowing a person at the moment can become a pain. He understands the girl's dreams, what the girl is pursuing, and what the girl wants most. However, can I give all this now?

Guilt and self-blame erode his soul like the devil, and he couldn't give the girl happiness, and he couldn't give the girl happiness. Then seek relief, a better relief for girls.

He begins to snub the girl, using his ugly appearance to sarcastically hurt the girl.

In fact, the girl in his heart understands it completely, but a relationship is not said to be able to let go.

So, he used self-harm to drive the girl away. This time he succeeded. The price of success is two broken hearts.

In the days when there were no girls, Zhang Taiping began a devilish college life.

He soaked in the library like he was eating like crazy. In addition to reading all the information about the agricultural profession, there is also a lot of information about Chinese medicine.

He has obtained a professional master's degree and a doctorate. I went to take the Chinese medicine qualification certificate again. Then he frantically visited the famous old Chinese medicine doctors in various places, because the obsession in his heart was still there.

He once guessed with a neurotic thought whether he was pregnant with a **** in his body.

I also went to the street fortune teller to calculate a hexagram from the blind man, and the blind man gave the saying that "the lonely star of the sky". Although I haven't read many novels, I still understand the meaning behind this word. So he kicked the blind man's stall with indignation and walked away, and the blind man did not ask her for money, but watched him leave with regretful eyes behind his back.

If you can't seek medical treatment, it's useless to take medicine, and your fortune telling doesn't achieve what you want, and your heart is completely dead.

Now he works as an administrator on the country's largest flower and fruit tree trading network, and at the same time writes novels on the country's largest website. There are also three or four hundred thousand in a year. He deducted the cost of high-energy materials that he needed all the time, and the cost of basic necessities, and donated the rest to the orphanage that raised him.