The wind is quiet at night, and the lights are dim at night.

The day in September is not cold, but the cold dew falls in the middle of the night, and the cold is pressing.

After Gu Jinzhi bathed, he called the palace people to come in and serve and change clothes.

The smell of the bath was very strong, and the four little palace maids who came in all frowned slightly.

Gu Jinzhi's eyes did not squint, and let them serve and put on their middle clothes and come out of the bath.

Her hair was wet.

Zhu Zhongjun had already bathed and waited for a long time.

This side is done, Aunt Cheng's great responsibility can be relieved, and she took her people back to Kunning Palace to make a difference. The Xilan Hall was quiet.

Seeing Gu Jinzhi come out, Zhu Zhongjun smiled at her.

The palace man took a towel and wiped Gu Jinzhi's hair.

Gu Jinzhi took it and said with a smile: "It's not early, so you don't need to serve anymore......"

The palace people obeyed, didn't dare to say a word, and retreated outside the hall one after another.

closed the door of the palace, and in the wide and tall inner hall, only Gu Jinzhi and Zhu Zhongjun remained.

The roof of the hall is high, and in the glazed tiles of the dome, a few wisps of cold moonlight are revealed, which are reflected on the ground, and the moonlight that penetrates through the window is connected, quiet and condensed.

The chill of the autumn night crept up.

Zhu Zhongjun got up and hugged Gu Jinzhi to the bed.

He took the towel in her hand and said with a smile, "I'll help you wipe your hair." ”

Gu Jinzhi said yes.

She sat with her back to Zhu Zhongjun, the wet green silk hanging down, all on her thin and delicate shoulders.

Zhu Zhongjun helped her wipe her hair, and her movements were gentle.

The two were silent, and Zhu Zhongjun spoke: "Gu Jinzhi, I have a very strict problem.......

"I don't describe myself like that." Gu Jinzhi replied. The tone was calm and undulating, "Who said that there was something wrong with him?" This is a curse word. ”

"I have a hidden disease." Zhu Zhongjun changed his statement. "Except for sexual diseases, no one can be accused of any other disease. It can also be called a hidden disease, right? ”

Gu Jinzhi: "It should be possible." ”

She spoke very lightly and had little interest.

She felt that Zhu Zhongjun was talking nonsense.

They have been married for so many years, and Gu Jinzhi is a doctor again. Although the doctor will miss the time when he asks for the consultation of his dearest, Gu Jinzhi can see the clues of the disease.

Zhu Zhongjun has no hidden illness at all.

"When I was studying outside, most of my classmates thought I was gay." Zhu Zhongjun said.

"At that time, there was also this saying in our school, and the good-looking boys were all gay. You don't have to chase it. You are the best in the good-looking, and it is not unusual for others to misunderstand like this. "Gu Jin's way.

Zhu Zhongjun smiled.

When they were young, the domestic atmosphere was relatively conservative, and when he was in junior high school, it was girls who confessed to him.

When he went out to high school, most of the people who confessed to him were boys. There are also girls, but there are fewer of them. It's all Asian girls.

At that time, girls always said that he had the temperament of a......

“…… Have you dated guys? Gu Jinzhi asked, "Is this your hidden disease?" ”

The towel in Zhu Zhongjun's hand tightened, and his voice couldn't help but be angry: "No! What you say is disgusting. ”

"You said it first." Gu Jin's way. "I didn't say you were ......"

"I'm not!" Zhu Zhongjun immediately said, "We have been married for so many years, am I?" Isn't it clear to you? When I was with you, did I perfunctory you? ”

"Nope." Gu Jinzhi said fairly.

Zhu Zhongjun was satisfied.

The conversation turned back to his hidden illness.

"When we parted. I was in the prime of life. Zhu Zhongjun said, "Men have sperm and worms. I can't avoid it either. Sometimes I'm in a hurry and want to find someone. I used to look for ......"

Gu Jinzhi gently pursed his lips.

She never thought that Zhu Zhongjun would spend the rest of her life as a monk.

It's not realistic.

Their marriage was to be separated by Gu Jinzhi.

Whether he was looking for another woman, Gu Jinzhi didn't care much.

Now, she still doesn't care much.

"I've looked for ...... twice," Zhu Zhongjun said hesitantly.

Gu Jinzhi sighed: "It's okay. At that time, we were all separated, and you found someone else, which is not considered adultery. Besides, it's all from the previous life, and I didn't expect you not to look for it. Now, I want to marry you, I want to marry you now. Don't betray me in the future. ”

Zhu Zhongjun behind him was silent.

His hand wiping Gu Jinzhi's hair also paused.

He coughed lightly, looking embarrassed.

“…… It didn't work. Zhu Zhongjun was silent for a long time before he said.

Gu Jinzhi was also stunned.

"What's wrong?" Gu Jinzhi asked him.

"Disgusting." Zhu Zhongjun said, "The first time I went in, it was hot and wet, sticky and sticky, like swallowing the purulent phlegm spit out by others, I was so frightened that I withdrew, and I was so disgusted that I put on my clothes and left." The second time, I obviously wanted it very much, but when I thought of the feeling last time, it was even more disgusting, and I didn't even do the prelude, so I let the woman go......"

Gu Jinzhi frowned.

She thought for a moment and said, "When you do it with a woman, you feel disgusting?" ”

Zhu Zhongjun hummed softly.

"You're not gay?" Gu Jin said, "Who are you fooling?" ”

Then he remembered something, turned around, and looked at him, "Are you still like this, when you touched me, were you disgusting?" ”

Zhu Zhongjun threw away the handkerchief in his hand, leaned over her body, and kissed her on the lips.

Taking her hand in his mouth, sucking his beard, he let go of Gu Jinzhi, took her hand, and went down to touch him.

The hot doppelganger stood unwillingly.

"If it's disgusting, can you have this reaction?" Zhu Zhongjun said, "I'll do it with you, it's not disgusting at all." Our husband and wife for more than ten years before, which time was unpleasant? ”

Gu Jinzhi hurriedly retracted his hand.

Her attention shifted to Zhu Zhongjun's question, and she was less disgusted by his touch.

Thinking back to the joy of the bed in the previous life, it seems to be perfect.

Zhu Zhongjun has never expressed the slightest dislike for women.

Gu Jinzhi glanced at him.

In the bright candle flame, his eyebrows and eyes turned against the light, and he was handsome and gorgeous. Leaving only a deep outline, he looked at Gu Jinzhi so seriously.

Gu Jin said: "Those words." You made it all up, right? ”

Zhu Zhongjun immediately glared: "Am I so despicable? It's true, I swear to you. ”

Gu Jinzhi pondered.

She thought about it for a long time. I recalled all the medical knowledge in my mind and said, "...... You're probably having a psychological problem. After we separated, did you get any stimuli? ”

After they separated, Zhu Zhongjun was not stimulated.

But he really doesn't have a good impression of girls.

This is the psychological shadow that his mother gave him.

He remembered his mother in his second uncle's bed all his life......

As long as he wasn't with Gu Jinzhi, he could think of his mother when he looked at other women. Then, he would feel sick.

"Nope." Zhu Zhongjun said.

"Then you're gay, don't quibble." Gu Jinzhi said, "Zhu Zhongjun." Do I look like a man? ”

“…… Homosexuality is not what you define it that way. Zhu Zhongjun despised her, "Actually, those two things happened, and I also thought that I might be, so I found a man and tried it." ”

Gu Jinzhi's brows furrowed even deeper.

"And then?" She asked.

"More disgusting." Zhu Zhongjun said, "Just thinking about it, I want to vomit." At that time, I thought, will there be contact, will it change? What's the use of thinking, you have to try it. For the rest of my life, I can't live on my own, right? I'm normal. I've never made out with a man, so I tried it. When I saw him undressed, I didn't react. He's going to come near me. I broke the bridge of his nose with a punch. ”

Gu Jinzhi slowly breathed a sigh of relief.

Luckily, he's not.

Gu Jinzhi doesn't want to get married, she is not that great.

"Gu Jinzhi. I've never told you, but I said it. It's all true, I promise. There is a half-truth. that I may not die well. Do you understand? Zhu Zhongjun asked her, "Actually, I don't like men, and I don't like women." I just like you. I'm a monster. ”

Gu Jinzhi's eyes suddenly opened, and he looked at him fixedly.

Zhu Zhongjun took her hand, put it on his chest, and said softly: "I only like you." You don't have me, you can find someone else. Without you, I'm left with me. Don't ignore me......"

Gu Jinzhi looked at him stunned.

“…… It's not scientific. She said, "Because of what?" ”

Zhu Zhongjun pursed his lips.

Even now, the reason is still difficult for him to say.

The biological mother did something unbearable, and Zhu Zhongjun wanted to keep it as secret as possible.

He didn't want Gu Jinzhi to know those things.

It seems that he has the ugliest side of himself, and he doesn't want Gu Jinzhi to see it. No matter how much he loved her, he didn't have the courage to reveal all his disgrace. Although he knew very well that Gu Jinzhi was not a person who did not distinguish between right and wrong.

Zhu Zhongjun is Zhu Zhongjun, and his mother is his mother.

To understand is to understand, but to be unspeakable.

Reason cannot prevail over emotion.

"You're stressing me out so much." Seeing that he was silent, Gu Jinzhi said, "You...... Do you like me? I never knew. ”

Zhu Zhongjun was silent again.

He felt very aggrieved.

"Can I take those words back?" Zhu Zhongjun let go of her hand and said, "Forget it, I'll make up the story." ”

Then he touched her hair, which was already eighty percent dry, and said, "It's not early, go to bed." Tomorrow morning, we will have to 'see you in the morning', and we will have to toss for another day. ”

With that, he slept in the bed and lay down on his side.

Gu Jinzhi didn't move.

She looked at the man lying with his back to her, and her heart was full of mixed feelings.

Her heart, as if it were a dry and hard clod of soil, needed a lot of emotional water to water it, and it slowly penetrated to soak her heart.

Zhu Zhongjun's water was poured very loudly.

Although it was half a beat slower, Gu Jinzhi still understood.

She asked, "Have you ever loved me?" ”

Zhu Zhongjun was angry for a while.

He didn't get up, still turned his back to her, and said in an aggrieved voice: "My heart is still the same, it has never changed." I've always loved you. You don't have to feel pressured, just like me a little. ”

Gu Jinzhi was stunned again.

It took a long time for her to lie down.

Zhu Zhongjun's shoulders were next to her.

There were ripples in her heart, and it was difficult to dissipate for a long time.

She turned around, hugged Zhu Zhongjun's waist tightly, and pressed her face against his back.

The warmth of his skin spread to Gu Jinzhi's face through the light middle coat.

Her eyes were astringent, and tears welled up in her eyes.

(To be continued......)