In the summer of 2003, in a small Internet café in Tongchuan County, Rongcheng, Fan Wan was smoking 2 cents and 5 cigarettes, and the computer screen in front of him was glowing with blue light, constantly changing colors with the transformation of the picture, and the lingering smoke came and went with the shouting and killing sound from the headphones, which was particularly intense!

But the greasy mouse and the keyboard that had been smoothed out made Fan Wan unable to keep up any spirits. The reason is because there is no money.

Fan Wan was born in this marginal town since she was a child, grew up here, and there is nothing worth showing off except for studying well in elementary school, she learned to smoke in junior high school, of course, fighting, and picking up girls are naturally not a problem, and later she was promoted to high school.

Now I don't know how many all-nighters Fan has had at night, he is a regular visitor to this Internet café, he comes here to sit and play games when he has money, and he comes here when he has no money, because he doesn't know where to go otherwise, it is like a gathering place for defective teenagers who do not go to school, smoky, and have nothing to do all day.

Fan Wan's mother died early, and her father was an ordinary taxi driver, working for others, at that time, there was no taxi company in Tongchuan County, they were all privately contracted, and they had to pay money to the boss every day, and if the business was good today, the remaining money could be kept by themselves.

In short, 365 days, every day, Fan Wan's father Fan Zhengmin is also extremely disappointed in this son, in other words, he doesn't have much hope, but at the age of 16, what can he do if he doesn't study?

Do you want to go out to work?

Fan Zhengmin knows his son very well, so he went out like this, and it is estimated that he will call home in a few days, but it is still the same sentence, no money!

Fan Wan has a few friends.,But they're all unproductive goods.,Of course,Fan Wan is not much better.,Turn off the game to open the web page.,Open the stand-alone game to see if there is even CS in the Internet café.,It's a pity.,There's none.。

Most of the people were already asleep, and a few were hiding in the corner watching a small movie, Fan Wan touched his pocket, there were still two yuan left, and it was not possible to cover the night.

"Boss settle the bill, take two more Chaotian Gates to me!" Fan Wan turned off the computer and got off the computer, went to the front desk to check out, and bought two cigarettes by the way, like this kind of Internet café will sell loose cigarettes, that is to say, a pack of whole cigarettes is dismantled and sold, because most of the student party has no money to buy a whole pack, five yuan a pack of Chaotianmen, dismantled is 5 cents two, the boss is very skilled to take two to him, obviously, Fan Wan is a regular customer.

He took a cigarette neatly, put one in his ear and one in his mouth, took out a lighter and lit it, and squatted at the door of the Internet café in the middle of the night, only seeing a little fire in the dark.

Fan Wan is not ignorant, on the contrary, he knows his family situation and wants to study well, but unfortunately the foundation can't keep up, and occasionally makes the head teacher feel that the sun is coming out of the west and listens carefully to a class, but before the day comes, Fan Wan has become the same as before.

There's no way, I don't understand, it's impossible for the teacher to make up lessons for a poor student like Fan Wan alone, unless Fan Zhengmin is willing to spend money to invite the teacher to a meal and give a red envelope or something.

But that's not long-lasting, because Fan Wan understands that this kind of make-up class is actually doing homework, the teacher asked you to buy a bunch of papers to do, and she corrected it when she finished it, and she told you about it if she made a mistake, as for whether you understood it or not, it was another story.

Therefore, Fan Wan cheered up a few times and was negative a few times, and finally returned to this field.

It's hard to be a good person, but it's only a matter of minutes to become a bad person.

Fan Wan stood up and went home along the familiar street with a cigarette in her mouth, and there were few passers-by in the dark, although it was summer, it was still a little cold at night.

Fan Wan is good-looking, 78 meters tall, which is okay among high school students, and he also has a favorite girl, who is a classmate in their class, with a long ponytail and a group of smug girlfriends.

Like many ordinary high schools, poor students like to have good grades, and good grades always fall in love with poor students, and then the two get worse together, so Fan Wan feels that if those who are beautiful and have good grades can't resist the temptation, it is estimated that they will go to a third-rate university in a few years, but the girl he likes is not, Fan Wan didn't think about looking for her, in fact, Fan Wan knew that the girl had a good impression of him, but he still retained a little conscience, but he gave up this idea.

When he returned home and opened the door gently, the fan in the house that had been used for several years was still squeaking and was placed on a plastic bench, Fan Wan knew that his father had fallen asleep, and he did not work the night shift tonight.

Skillfully touched the kitchen, washed his oily face, brushed his teeth, and washed his feet with the shower head a few times, Fan Wan lay back on his bed.

In the dark night, Fan Wan opened his eyes and looked at the ceiling above his head, turning over and over, surrounded by a qiē that he had been familiar with since he was a child, the enamel cup that had been used for many years, the photo of his mother before her death, and the only elementary school award certificate she had received since she was a child, and in addition, there were only cigarette butts hidden under the bed and tied up in plastic bags.

Fan Wan took the last cigarette off her ear, put it in her mouth, hid in the quilt and lit the fire.

Because this will make the lighter quieter, although Fan Wan defected, he was still afraid of his father, if his father knew that this kid was smoking, it was estimated that he would immediately be hit by a big ear scraper.

lit it, Fan Wan took a deep breath very reluctantly, and then gently exhaled the cigarette, enjoying it very much, the smoke can numb his nerves and make him no longer so sad.

However, when this cigarette was finished, Fan Wan became helpless again, he didn't know what he should do in the future, what to do?

It is estimated that after graduating from high school, he will go to work, or learn to drive and become a taxi driver for life like his father, or he will be sent by his father to be a soldier, but there is no road that Fan Wan hopes to take, because he knows that these roads cannot get rid of the fate of his family's poverty.

Perhaps, you really should make a decision.

There are times when decisions are impulsive, and what young people want to do, adults don't necessarily do, or even dare not think about it.

And Fan Wan had such thoughts before and tried, but every time he came back when he ran out of money, his father even laughed at him, saying: "If you kid has the ability to go, don't come back, what is it if you go away and come back like this?" ”

Fan Wan heard these words many times, and then gradually became numb.

But tonight, Fan Wan couldn't sleep, because he was very confused about his future, and he couldn't find the future in the small county town of Tongchuan.

Fan Wan got out of bed and sat on the edge of the bed to light a cigarette, but unfortunately he touched his trouser pocket, but there was only 1 yuan and 5 cents left, and a lighter.

It's ridiculous, no, I don't have money to smoke but I have a lighter, Fan Wan smiled self-deprecatingly, and then began to think about whether she should follow the idea in her heart.

For a long time, Fan Wan didn't move, and it wasn't until more than 4 o'clock in the middle of the night that there was a quiet movement in this small bedroom.

A backpack that hasn't been used for a long time, some changes of clothes that you usually like, an electronic watch from a girl who likes you for your birthday, and of course, the most important thing.

It's money.

Fan Wan quietly took out the photo album on the cabinet, which left a photo of Fan Wan and her mother, but Fan Wan didn't want to see her mother one last time on a whim, but under the photo, she hid her biggest reliance this time.

took out the photo, revealing three gray old man's heads, as well as two 50 and several 10 yuan, this is Fan Wan's last belongings, a total of 465 yuan, these are all quietly given to him by his grandparents on weekdays, Fan Wan didn't dare to let his father know, because once he was known, he would definitely be confiscated like New Year's money, so he hid them.

Finally, put the money in your close-fitting pants pocket and carry the packed backpack over your shoulder.

Want to go?

Fan Wan looked at the familiar qiē around here, the one he did tonight no one knew except himself, his father was sleeping next door, if he put down his backpack and went back to bed at this time, he would still be the same as before.

made a decision suddenly, but at the moment of implementation, Fan Wan retreated a little, the comfortable life made him reluctant to leave, maybe there was a little family bond, maybe there was the girl he had always liked but didn't dare to confess.

After continuing to sit for more than ten minutes, Fan Wan pressed the watch to light up, and the time displayed on the electronic watch was 4:55 in the morning.

Silence returned.

In the dark night, only Fan Wan's shining eyes and the sound of her heartbeat that she could hear.

I don't know how long it took, until the sound of my father turning over came from next door, which made Fan Wanru wake up in a dream, what should I do?

There seems to be a force pushing him invisibly, go? If you don't earn money, won't you come back?

Fan Wan finally asked herself.

The movement next door seemed to have become the most turbulent motivation for Fan Wan to leave home, he walked out of the bedroom with a backpack, took a piece of paper and a pen, went to the toilet to turn on the light, and wrote the news of his departure on a small stool.

Fan Wan knew that after a few hours, his father would not come to him when he saw it, and he would not feel anything, he would only be Fan Wan the same as before, running away from home, a child's trick.

If you run out of money, you will naturally come back, this is Fan Zhengmin's evaluation of his son Fan Wan.

Finally, gently placing the note on the coffee table in the living room, Fan Wan stood up and looked around at the familiar Qiē.

Inexplicably a little sad.

He is only 16 years old, in fact, he is not different from other children, he never resents his parents, if the time can be repeated, he will definitely study hard, and his father will work hard to earn money for him to study, but now he is okay?

There are some things that there is no turning back, and Fan Wan knows that her life may be different because of tonight.