On the way back to Baton Rouge from the Angolan prison, there was silence in the pickup truck, Joseph did not try to speak again, Hugo only kept his mouth shut, not even the radio was turned on, only the scattered sound of the wind and the rolling tires outside the window, which made the hot summer even more dull, and even breathing became difficult.

Hugo's mind is building Matthew's life little by little, and in a trance, he only feels that he is Matthew, Matthew is him, the two characters are completely overlapped, all the memories are intertwined, unable to distinguish each other, and even make Hugo have an illusion of "this is what I have experienced".

Matthew's family was a simple, typical American blue-collar family, his father was a carpenter, and his mother was a textile mill worker, and they were united by an unexpected pregnancy, and they lived together before they even had time to get a marriage license.

My father was an alcoholic, and he had a strict drinking problem, and every time he got drunk, he would complain about the unfairness of the world, and the partiality and independence of the government. Cut, complaining that rich people control the rules of society, complaining that he lacks a platform to show his abilities, complaining that his parents are not from a good background, complaining that his appearance of Matthew ruined his future, and complaining that his wife has become a drag on him......

In Matthew's memory, although his father complained a lot, he was lucky not to beat anyone, he just lay on the sofa and complained about everything. Matthew didn't know if he should be glad he hadn't been a victim of domestic violence.

Mother was a weak woman, and in Matthew's memory she seemed to cry all the time, crying when she heard her father's voice raised a little bit, crying when she saw that she was not full, crying when she was worried that there would be no heating in winter, and even crying when her finger was accidentally pricked by a needle. At this time, his mother held him tightly in her arms and cried as much as she could, and he could clearly remember the feeling of tears running down his back.

Matthew felt that his mother was pitiful because she was so weak and she needed a strong arm to protect her, but unfortunately neither his father nor himself could provide for it; But Matthew also felt that his mother was very annoying, and that endless crying always complicated everything, and how he wished she could shut up, but every time he saw her tears, he couldn't help but soften.

Later, Craig was born, then Sony, and finally Troy, which made their family crowded, and their already poor life fell into a quagmire.

Matthew didn't like the atmosphere at home, his father's complaints and his mother's tears always filled the house with an oppressive atmosphere that made him breathless, and he wanted to escape from here. But his weak mother and his younger brother, including his poor father, were his fetters, and he felt that he was going to be trapped here for the rest of his life.

The school days were always hard, and the children of the rich families always liked to laugh at him and tease him, and he tried to fight back, but his thin figure was very difficult to succeed. The sturdy kids on the rugby team were keen to throw him in the trash because they loved watching him struggle to crawl out of it.

He also didn't do very well in reading because he couldn't concentrate, which made him frustrated. He wanted to do well in his studies, he knew it was one of the best ways to get out of this hellish place, but every effort ended in failure, he wanted to study, he tried to read, but he couldn't, which made him angry with himself.

He knew that he had to be strong, not only because other people would constantly bully him and humiliate him, but he also had no way to get out of this hellish place, then it was fatal, he didn't want to go on like this for the rest of his life, at least he didn't want to be like his father, hiding at home and drinking all day, being a coward; And because he wants to protect his mother and brothers, he needs to protect them, and if even he doesn't stand up, his mother and brothers will be eaten to the bone in this damn place.

Matthew met Carl Vitello (Carl). vitello）。

Carl was from the next town, and he was expelled from school for committing an accident, but his father was a wealthy man, so he transferred him to their school. Carl saved him from the rugby team on his first day at the school, and they became friends ever since.

Matthew thinks Carl is very powerful, and he is always able to settle things with him, although Carl always orders him to do this and that, but he doesn't care, because many people in the school envy him and want to be like him.

When he saw the star quarterback of the football team peeing his pants in fright at Karl with a pistol, he felt that life was finally starting to look good; When he sees Carl entangled with the school's most popular beauty, Mei, his life can finally see women; When Carl threatens the best students in his class to help them with their homework, the teacher doesn't notice that his future finally dawns......

With Carl, Matthew began to learn to enjoy life for the first time, he learned to drink, he learned to smoke. poison, learned to gamble, learned to mess with women, even if he is not tall, even if he is not strong, so what? Karl gave him a revolver, which made him invincible, and Matthew felt that he was incomparably strong, even against the players of the rugby team, and he was extremely strong enough to make the opponent kneel in front of him with ease.

He used to be afraid, he used to regret it, but every time at this time, he would see his mother sitting in a chair curled up in a ball and crying silently, especially after his father died of alcoholism, this family fell on his shoulders, he knew that he could not be afraid and could not be weak, he needed to stand up for this family.

So, Matthew began to enjoy this qiē. Gradually, he became one of the most famous and powerful people in the town, and many ordinary residents took a detour when they saw him, which made him feel like he had supreme power.

Matthew began to raise the whole family, and he even got married and found his wife, who was called Helen. Although he got a job repairing cars, he was obviously happier than a job extorting and blackmailing Carl everywhere, and he was keen on this kind of life, because Carl was often the one who was in charge, and he only needed to go up and collect the money, which was so easy and effortless.

That day, he and Carl went to a motorcycle party where they participated in a gambling game, but unfortunately lost, he lost all his two hundred dollars, and Carl was also penniless. The two men tried to rob the bikers directly, but they were surrounded by a group of men with submachine guns and had to flee.

In the bushes, they saw an old-fashioned used car, and in it was a young couple who were dating, and he later learned that the woman's name was Hope, and the man's name was Walter.

There was nowhere to vent their anger, so Karl pulled him in - they had guns in their hands.

Carl pulled Hope in front, and he pulled Walter behind, thinking they were just trying to teach the couple a lesson, and then snatched their car and left. But things get out of hand, and Carl is trying to commit violence against Hope, who warmly invites him to enjoy Hope.

He wanted to refuse, but he couldn't refuse Carl, he couldn't help it, so he went over and enjoyed Hope, and then it was Carl's turn.

That's the end of the story, isn't it? However, he saw that Carl had completely lost control, picked up the dagger and stabbed Hope frantically, like a madman. He wanted to run away, he wanted to leave, but Carl's ferocious eyes scared him, his steps couldn't move at all, Carl ordered him to grab Walter, was it because Hope was dead?

He couldn't refuse, he couldn't refuse Karl's orders, he really couldn't ...... So, he grabbed Walter, and then he heard Carl pull the trigger.

This qiē was all instructed by Karl, and it was forced by Karl, so he should be innocent, right? He is innocent. Even if he was guilty, he was only guilty of following Karl's orders, right? So how should it be judged in law? Shouldn't he be acquitted? He still has his mother and younger brothers to take care of......

As soon as Hugo looked down, he saw that his hands were covered with blood, it was Walter's blood, and he wanted to wipe them clean, but no matter how he wiped them, he couldn't wipe them clean, which made him feel infinite panic. Then when he looked up, he saw Derek's bloody corpse lying next to him, it was Derek, not Walter, and he put this blood-stained dagger at his feet, Derek's hideous face seemed to be smiling proudly, "I lost, but you didn't win either......"

Hugo was taken aback, and desperately crawled back, trying to avoid Derek's eyes, but those eyes were always there anyway, and he looked around, only to find that it was an endless darkness, with no coordinates and no lighting, only a corpse of Derek accompanying him.

Hugo had to get up, and ran forward with all his might, I don't know how long, and there was still eternal darkness all around, but the dead silence was heard, and he heard a cry that seemed to be nothing, which made him stop and look in fear.

Suddenly, not far away, a figure appeared, curled up in a chair, whimpering lowly, and the mournful cry gently drifted with the sound of the wind. It was Matthew's mother...... Or his mother? The surrounding blackness faded like a tide, and in a blink of an eye, it became Matthew's home, and Matthew's mother curled up in her chair and wept sadly, and the tears continued to overflow like a flood, as if the whole house could be flooded in the next second.

What's going on? Is he Hugo or Matthew? He looked down at his hands, but they were still Matthew's blood-soaked hands, and his soul was looking at them, he was Matthew, Matthew was him.

Suddenly, Hugo was frightened awake, and suddenly sat up, gasping for breath, and the wet sweat made him look like he had been fished out of the water, his heart pounded against his chest, and his temples seemed to burst, and he blindly looked at the scene around him, and turned his head several times in a row, only to realize that this was not Matthew's house, but a hotel room in Baton Rouge.

It was just a dream, just a dream.