- Chen Jiu put the bamboo tube back on the pyre, and at the same time casually explained: "The pu fan is used to urge the fire, but the fan is not allowed in the stove...... First, it is not easy to get the fan in, and secondly, even if the fan is forced to enter, a lot of firewood ash will be rolled out, so it is rare to make any good meals in the smoke-filled kitchen. ”

Although she didn't get the answer she wanted, after a short period of anxiety, she had no intention of continuing to ask.

"I really don't have the talent to burn stoves, but a few of them firmly don't believe it, but ...... Now they should be able to see it for themselves. Lin Shan continued to flip through the book, the corners of his mouth raised, although he didn't say any euphemistic words, but the dry atmosphere in the kitchen just now suddenly warmed up.

No matter how seamless a wall is, to let sunlight penetrate it, you only need to move a brick of space.

Lin Shan stopped turning the book for a while, took a pair of tongs standing next to the stove, and held the manuscript books that were piled up together in the stove. Immediately after that, he followed the example of Chen Jiu just now, and picked up the bamboo blower that rested on the pyre......

In fact, whether it is sitting in the court to handle cases or cooking in the court, there is no absolute division between men and women. It's just that in ancient times, some people made up a set of rules for indoctrination in order to be lazy - of course, this rule is not all for locking women in the scope of activities of the hall, but also throwing out some other shackles - in short, many things are not that men can't do it, such as cooking on the fire, it's not that they can't learn, it's not that they will be cursed by some mental power if they do it, but that a man is willing to do it.

Willing to do this from the bottom of his heart, Lin Shan imitated old wine and learned quickly.

If you learn how to stir-fry with her, you may need more experience accumulation, but the job of making a fire is ...... If he only burns the paper manuscript that is already dry and flammable, as long as he is not distracted like just now, there is absolutely no reason to only smoke and not catch fire.

The fire in the stove brightened, and the smoke in the kitchen quickly dissipated.

Lin Shan put down the bamboo tube sideways and turned around. I saw Chen Jiu standing next to the stove looking at him a little dumbfounded.

Lin Shan asked casually, "What are you looking at?" "Pick up another manuscript at random.

"Look at you." Chen Jiu replied in a daze, still standing in place.

"Huh?" Lin Shan's hand was about to flip through the book slightly, and suddenly a sentence came out: "Is there something on your face?" After saying that, he felt as if there was an itch somewhere on his face, so he stretched out his fingers and scraped it.

This scrape. I really wiped a trace of firewood dust from my fingers on my face.

Looking at Lin Shan's face as if there was an extra black cat whisker, Chen Jiu couldn't hold back his laughter, and finally stopped standing by the stove, she took out the handkerchief tucked in her sleeve, first went to the water tank and scooped half a scoop of water to wet it, and then walked back, squatted down beside Lin Shan again, and wiped his face with a handkerchief.

The man in front of him had a gentle smile on his face again.

Because it was so close, Chen Jiu felt that this warmth was almost about to melt in front of her eyes, and some of it was about to dazzle her eyes.

Fortunately, she and he didn't keep looking at each other like this.

Aged wine floats in the eyes. Out of the corner of her eye, she suddenly saw a little red stained by Lin Shan's sleeves, and remembered the cohesive blood he suddenly coughed up just now, and her heart ached. But she soon silently told herself that she must let go of the knot in her heart, and at the same time she must find a way to open the knot outside her heart.

Lin Shan's chest still has wrinkles, and other book friends are reading:. That's what he just caught. Chen Jiu hesitated slightly, then reached over and stroked it, and asked with the question, "What happened to you just now?" In the past, you were only like this when you were seriously injured, and the old pharmacist said that you were suffering from ischemia at that time, and you haven't done it again for almost a year after you recovered from your injury, but now what's going on? ”

Lin Shan didn't say anything to comfort her, but said more directly: "Actually, you know why. Isn't it? You know that my illness is not in my body, but in my heart. ”

If he said this to Liao Shi, he would have to confuse the senior pharmacist with strong theoretical intelligence...... What is not in the heart or in the body? Isn't the body and mind one?

But Chen Jiu understood that the body and mind in his words were often alienated, and he was often dealing with things with the reason he was accustomed to, with little or no choice based on his mind alone. Because his emotions only need to touch somewhere in his heart and are banned. It can become very fragile and fragile.

Women are naturally sensual, and in addition to Chen Jiu's delicate sensibility in women's thinking, she is also a woman who knows many things about Lin Shan's past, and constantly swings between her confidant and lover and can't find her own identity.

So when she heard him respond to her in a questioning tone, she was stunned: it turned out that he also knew it.

Of course, Lin Shan knew where his heart disease was.

In the past, he would have only avoided touching that place. But today, when hugging the woman in front of him, he suddenly made a decision secretly.

He decided not to run away once, at least today, he had to face it head-on.

The discomfort in his heart surged again, Lin Shan stopped turning the book, the hand holding the manuscript book gradually tightened, he lowered his eyes slightly and said: "There is a woman living in my heart, this is something that you know alone. She has lived there for more than ten years, and if she is driven away for a while, it is not normal to be stabbed for it. ”

"But...... I can't see you hurting yourself for a shadow that has disappeared for so many years......" The slightly wet handkerchief slid to the ground, Chen Jiu couldn't care to pick it up, she tightly grasped Lin Shan's hand that was gently covering her knee, and her fingers were slightly cool, "I've always been by your side, why can your attention only be on the shadow in your heart?" I see you frowning and tired, and your heart will feel bad, but can you feel these feelings of mine? ”

Lin Shan's gaze drooped, and he couldn't see clearly what kind of waves were in his eyes at this time, but his shoulders suddenly stiffened, and this subtle reaction was magnified in the eyes of Chen Jiu, who was extremely close to him.

"Why can't we just try to forget?" Chen Jiu asked, "I can feel that you have been taking responsibility for her, but what have you done to be sorry for her?" I just feel that if she were still alive, not only could she not blame you, but she should also be grateful to you. If it weren't for your persistence and so many years of dedication, it would have been difficult for her daughter to grow up healthy. ”

"No, I have something to be sorry for her." Lin Shan sighed softly, the uncomfortable feeling in his chest gradually became more and more obvious, and he had to put aside the topic slightly to relieve himself. "Did the old ghost who can't grow a head anymore, but whose tongue can still grow, tell you about a certain rule in my sect?"

Of course, Chen Jiu remembered very clearly the words that Liao Shi explained to her just a few days ago. Because although it is only a fragment of the explanation. But it solved one of the biggest mysteries in Chen Jiu's heart, a reason why Lin Shan was indifferent no matter how hard she tried to get close.

Faced with his question, Chen Jiu nodded and asked, "Just because of this?" Even if you once rejected her, she later married the emperor and was named Concubine Xian, and she was already happy. ”

"I used to think so, too." Lin Shan said in a low voice, "She also thinks so, if she marries the emperor, she will have her status, fine clothes and food." Feelings can also be cultivated slowly. But she failed, so she didn't get happiness. ”

"But can you say that such a failure is all your responsibility?" Chen Jiu originally looked at this matter from Lin Shan's camp, but when she heard the meaning of self-blame in his tone, she couldn't help but defend him, "Her failure." It may also be because one of the two people in the marriage is not deep enough to love, or both of them just come together in shape. It is not difficult to imagine that an emperor loves too many things, but his identity indirectly requires him to be fraternity, but fraternity may be the greatest affection; And if a woman does not have enough love. What's more, she is such a decisive and assertive woman, of course she will not compromise lightly......"

Chen Jiu's words made Lin Shan gain some strange but clear insights, but the sense of guilt in his heart not only did not get sorted out, but gradually grew. He took a deep breath and said, "If I hadn't rejected her, she wouldn't have had to make such a dangerous attempt." ”

"A dangerous attempt?" Chen Jiu was puzzled.

Lin Shan said softly: "More than ten years ago. When I just left the Great Wilderness Mountain, although she was already very close to Wang Chi, she regarded him as a confidant and friend. At that time, she often said that one was that a woman could become a close friend of a man, and the other was that she would never marry an emperor. ”

It was never burned again. The Great Wilderness Mountain has always been a mysterious place built by the North Fence School, with the majestic peaks piercing the sky, and the yin and yang cutting the dawn. Although he occasionally felt bored when he studied with his master in the grass house, Lin Shan always felt that life in the mountains was the most peaceful and peaceful part of his life.

But a person's life course of decades cannot have only one tone, and he who learned from that ancient school is destined to be unable to avoid a storm.

However, what bothers Lin Shan the most in this life is not what he has learned or done, but a love word.

The love words strictly forbidden by the Beili School were quietly planted in his heart by a woman who was also at the most worry-free age in his most harmonious life.

Maybe it was so much rain that day that he ignored this little movement in his heart; Or maybe it's the raindrops, the spirit that fell from the sky, gave rise to the foggy atmosphere that was passed on by Yan Ran's clever smile!

However, it wasn't until he lost it completely that he belatedly admitted the word.

Acknowledging this loss will only bring untold suffering.

Lin Shan breathed a sigh of relief, and then continued: "She explained that marrying the emperor is a very dangerous thing, I can't understand why she said that, and I didn't ...... until she died."

Thinking of his misguided life, and thinking of the cause of Ye Ziqing's death, who was about to find out the truth, Lin Shan suddenly felt a tearing pain in his heart. He couldn't help but continue to speak, but in fact a salty smell had surged up in his throat, and his crushed lips turned slightly white.

He still couldn't hide it completely, and a trace of blush quietly overflowed the corners of his lips, stinging the heart of the woman beside him.

"Don't talk about it... Don't think about it anymore, I don't want to see you sad anymore......" Chen Jiu trembled and probed the sleeves of Lin Shan's two sides. After recovering from his injury, his health was not as good as before, and he often carried a sweat towel with him. Finding the neatly folded sweat towel and handing it to him, she said, "The old medicine master said that depression hurts the lungs, and sometimes you might as well try to release the accumulated qi, maybe it will be more comfortable than enduring." ”

Lin Shan took the sweat towel handed by Chen Jiu and wiped the corners of his mouth silently, he didn't recite the nineteenth chapter of the "Book of Land Things" like just now to calm his mind, he just didn't say anything more.

He came to the north with a heavy responsibility on his shoulders, and he didn't want to add to his burden in order to deal with some old things at this time. Only then did he realize that he had underestimated the word sealed in his heart and overestimated his ability to forget. After many years, I still haven't been able to forget that shadow.

Not thinking about it is indeed a way to cool the feelings.

Chen Jiu saw that his love had finally smoothed out, and although she hadn't yet asked for the answer she wanted, she was afraid to continue to ask again.

After many years, she followed Lin Shan. The identity of the non-wife and non-friend is ambiguous, and she has always been in a passive position, and she thinks that this is really related to her lack of initiative. Liao Shi said what he said to her a few days ago, and she has been thinking about it since then. Gathering courage. Now she finally mustered up the courage to ask, but she didn't expect that just a few words would provoke Lin Shan like this.

She was a little scared, the courage in her heart had begun to waver, and along with the courage like grass broken by the wind was her little bit of confidence...... He has not abandoned for more than ten years, but it is still not as important as the shadow in his heart.

Sighing silently, Chen Jiu took his gaze away from Lin Shan's face and swept over the stove without any idea. For a while, he ignored the fire in his muzzle, and the fire became much darker. Chen Jiu hesitated for a moment, and then picked up a scrap manuscript in the box beside him. I'm going to throw it into the mouth of the stove.

But at this moment, her hand holding the book was suddenly held by another hand reaching out from the side.

Chen Jiu was slightly stunned, and listened to Lin Shan say: "This book hasn't been turned over yet." ”

If it is an ordinary woman, in the face of this blocking words, she may inevitably be a little sensitive and suspicious, and feel aggrieved that she is not even allowed to touch one of his waste manuscripts. But Chen Jiu did not move this kind of cowardly thought at this time.

Maybe it's because she's a hard boy. In the face of many things, she has to think about her choices like a man in order to bear the pressure of living alone. It may also be because she has been with Lin Shan for a long time, and there are some places in her heart that rebuild each other, allowing her to think more rationally. At this time, she just suddenly thought of some details of Lin Shan's book burning, which were all flipped over before burning.

But he flipped through the book so fast that it wasn't like reading, it was like ...... Looking for what?

Chen Jiu handed the waste manuscript booklet in his hand to Lin Shan. Then he turned it over again, facing backwards and turning it backwards again, and then turning it backwards again, and then he threw the discarded manuscript book into the stove.

Chen Jiu leaned in with the tongs on the side to raise the fire, and then she looked back at Lin Shan and asked softly, "Are you looking for something?" ”

"Hmm. Looking for a letter. Lin Shan didn't hide it from Chen Jiu, "Three years ago, Jiang Chao took the letter that threatened me, saying that if I sent him back to Beijing halfway, he would destroy it. ”

Chen Jiu thought for a moment, and then said, "It seems that the love you disdained at that time was pretended. Actually, that letter is really important, otherwise you wouldn't be looking so carefully now. ”

Lin Shan said slowly: "If it can be preserved, of course, it is better than nothing, but if it must be lost for some principle, then lose it, in fact, it is not particularly important." ”

"But you later agreed to Jiang Chao's follow, and you still changed an initial decision for that letter." Although Lin Shan only mentioned a few words about that letter three years ago, Chen Jiu remembered the words he said very clearly, so she knew who wrote the letter, and this is also the important thing.

"I'll help you find it." Chen Jiu changed the topic, and after a slight pause, she suddenly smiled and said, "I believe that in addition to my heart, my hands are also skillful." ”

Lin Shan suddenly smiled and said, "You also need ingenuity to find things? ”

Chen Jiu's expression moved, and he pretended to be annoyed and said, "If you don't allow me to help with this, you will think I'm stupid." ”

"What kind of theory is this...... The smile on Lin Shan's face stiffened slightly, and after a moment he said again: "Okay, I don't dislike you." ”

I don't hate you.

It's just these four words, even if there is a melting warmth in the heart of Dechen Jiu, as if all the sourness, disappointment, and pain gathered in the previous question have all been dissolved.

She probably didn't even know herself, and she didn't expect much he could give her.

Slightly lowering his head, the corners of Chen Jiu's mouth hooked a faint smile, and he turned the book silently.

After a while, the gentle warmth in Chen Jiu's heart gradually settled, and she suddenly remembered a question that she had just ignored, and immediately asked: "By the way, Brother Lin, I remember that you didn't have the habit of putting things in your books before, and you once belittled it, saying that it was easy to cause loss...... How could the letter be hidden in this way? ”

"I've searched everywhere else, but I haven't found it. Although I am not sure if I lost my mind and was caught in the book one day, I can really rule out this possibility by looking for it. Lin Shan maintained the posture of flipping through the book, and said slowly. There are some bad habits, once learned, that are likely to be harder to change than good habits. I have been away from the Shimen School and the officialdom in Kyoto for more than ten years, and after living an unrestrained life for a long time, I naturally have some bad habits. ”

Lin Shan's words are clearly reasonable. But when Chen Jiu heard this, the shadow of another person appeared in his mind.

Of course, Chen Jiu has seen Ye Ziqing.

Although it is only a few faces, it is impressive again and again.

If it weren't for the family Jin Shankan behind this woman, who could put pressure on the treasury of the Southern Zhou Dynasty at that time, although she had no fame, she still had a high social status; If it weren't for the fact that this woman had used her own power to help the hungry in the war years, although the means of calculating her business peers were a little dirty, there were always far more people in the world who thanked her than the few people who hated her; If it weren't for the fact that she resolutely bought and changed the way the Red Square was run in the face of a lot of criticism, the women in the building would have at least had some choices of their own to entertain others, although they had not left the party...... If not. That woman was really a bad habit, at least in the eyes of the world.

From the young female boss who opened the Qinglou Flower Shop to the virtuous concubine Niangniang who later got pregnant and then married, that woman not only has a lot of bad habits in the eyes of the world, but she will never use her bad habits to crack and change the good cultivation of the people around her. It is not easy to change yourself because of the habits of the people around you.

However, Lin Shan didn't mention it so far, even if Chen Jiu thought about it, he wouldn't say it explicitly.

She was silent for a moment and then suddenly said, "If I have a lot of bad habits, will you be disgusted and alienated from me?" ”

Lin Shan raised her head, a little surprised why she suddenly said this, and hesitated slightly. He said calmly, "There is nothing wrong with you, and I am not tired of you. ”

Yes or no, no, he rarely lingers in the "if" when he speaks.

But his words of certainty did not satisfy Chenjiu.

Chen Jiu lowered his head and muttered in a low voice: "Not being bored does not mean liking. ”

Lin Shan also lowered his gaze again, as if he had fallen into some kind of contemplation.

That's when it happened. Chen Jiu, who was turning the book more and more slowly, suddenly saw a flower in front of her, and a very thin envelope appeared between the title pages of the waste manuscript in her hand, obviously because the time had caused the original white envelope to be yellowed, and the stains on the envelope were dull in color, like bloodstains - it was the letter that Jiang Chao held to threaten Lin Shan three years ago.

Ye Ziqing has written many account pages. It was full of quirky "fonts" twisted together like loaches, and she didn't write much text in the box. First, because she doesn't like to communicate with people in that subtle way, even if she is still a girl who has not yet left the cabinet, she always has something to say to people in person; Second, her handwriting is so ugly that she can't find words to compliment her, and she seems to be quite face-saving in writing.

The person who can get Ye Ziqing's handwriting, Lin Shan, is one of the few people.

Chen Jiu's hand froze when he turned the book, not only did he not continue to flip it, but he also did not go to get the letter, nor did he prompt Lin Shan.

There was a hint of hesitation and hesitation in her eyes.

The fire in the stove has burned extremely vigorously under the "efforts" of the two people in front of the stove, and the water and rice in the iron pot with the dense lid on the stove have begun to make a slight noise...... At this time, if she raised her hand and threw the old letter containing Lin Shan's memories into the stove with the waste manuscript and the entrainment, she would be instantly drowned in the sea of fire, and she had done this action more than ten times, and Lin Shan, who was still contemplating with slightly lowered eyes, would not see anything strange at this time.

Burn this letter, and the man in front of him will have one less thing to inherit and reminisce...... And then he can make the lingering shadow in his heart fade a little?

However, in the end, the aged wine did not really do so.

Love and loyalty are one, how much you love someone, how deep you love and be loved, no matter whether there are other cunning shaves in the world, at least Chen Jiu must be loyal to what he loves