Pillow Creek sat cross-legged next to him and asked him, "Have you drunk?"

The fruit quinoa nodded.

"I thought you'd spend your whole life dealing with dairy and sugary drinks. ”

"Do you think it's bad to drink?" asked Fruit Quinoa cautiously.

"No, you make your own decisions about your life. ”

"Do you drink?"

Pillow Creek shook his head.

"You still don't think it's good to drink. ”

"What do you think of the girl who smokes?"

"I don't like that. ”

"That's right. Pillow Xi took out the cigarette case from his bag, "But I smoke." There are also many people who have told me that they don't like me to smoke, but I still smoke, and I feel that my life, my body, and my health can be controlled by myself. I'm not going to force myself to change myself to suit anyone's preferences. ”

"Even if you...... Yunxiu told you that he didn't like you to smoke, and you couldn't listen to it. ”

"He doesn't care about me in this area. ”

"What about you, do you not like what he does? ”

"To be honest, both me and I are over thirty years old, and we both know how to get along comfortably, and the way young people bind each other is not very applicable to us. ”

"Is this why you married him, because he is mentally mature, because he will not cling to you to make unreasonable and childish demands on you, because he is comfortable with him?"

"It's not. ”

"That ......"

Pillow Creek lit the cigarette and watched it burn, but didn't smoke it.

"If you marry someone one day, what will it be for? ”

"Married to someone else?" Fruit smiled, "I didn't think about it. Since my 18th birthday, I just thought I was going to marry you. Even after the breakup, I thought so, when we went on tour in a foreign country and went to a strange place, I would go to see the church first, and over the years, I have collected a lot of photos of beautiful churches, and I always feel that one day I will show them to you. ”

The fruit quinoa cried as she spoke.

Pillow Xi wiped his tears with the back of his hand, and the fruit quinoa grabbed her hand and buried her face in her palm to cry.

"Don't cry. Pillow Creek said: "You are a big star now, you can't drink like this." ”

"You know...... Do you know how much I like you. ”

"Do you know how I've been here all these years?"

Fruit Quinoa took her hand and touched his ear piercing.

"Do you know how much it hurts when you get these? ”

Fruit quinoa pulled down the collar of her shirt, showed her the tattoo on her chest, and asked her:

"Do you know what I was thinking when I asked my master to tattoo this sentence? ”

"What ...... you?"

"I don't know!"

"Every year on my birthday, I am so sad that everyone gives me a cake and sings a birthday song to me, I only think of the day I was 18 years old in South Korea, I half-knelt in front of you, begging you to ask if I can be with you. ”

"I don't even dare to celebrate Christmas, and when it comes to Christmas, when I see couples walking hand in hand, I will think of the cold rain that day, and you sat in front of me and cried. What if you ...... If you have read the content posted on my Weibo, you should know how I have been doing over the years and how much I like you. ”

"How can you ...... How can you marry someone else, how can you marry someone else...... What do you want me to do? What should I do? What do I want to do in the future, what do I want to do in the future, what do I want to do in the rest of my life?"

"I'm sorry. ”

"I don't want to be sorry!"

"I can give you whatever you want, more than he can give. If you don't like me playing games, I won't play them. If you don't like me, I'll change it. You don't like me to care about you, as long as you don't say it, I don't have to ask. If you don't want to see me, I'll disappear. I give you enough space, give you enough respect, I can give you what you want, I can give you everything, I like you so much, I can accommodate you in everything. ”

"Quinoa. Pillow Xi sighed and touched his head, "It's not like this to like someone." You're not happy with me, and it's tiring to accommodate and cater unilaterally. You are now a big star, there are thousands of people like you, I just, just a person on this earth who is too small to be small, not as dazzling as your own light. ”

"You're not one of the smallest people on this earth. You are my whole world, you are my whole world. ”

"I am a selfish and vicious woman. Didn't you complain before that I didn't take the initiative to contact you, and I didn't care about how you lived every day. ”

"I can understand ...... now"

"No, you don't have to understand, it's not because I'm that kind of person, it's just that I don't like you enough. ”

Fruit Quinoa looked up at her in horror.

"I now take the initiative to call my husband at least three or four times a day, I will also take the initiative to tell him what I ate and drank every day, who I saw and what happened, I will also be eager to share his joys, sorrows and sorrows of the day, and I will also want to participate in his life without me. That's how I'm selfish, not only selfish, but also vicious, not worthy of your liking. ”

The fruit quinoa still looked at her blankly.

"I'm not afraid to tell you. I have known Yunxiu since I was 13 years old, and he was not called by that name at that time, and when I met him, he had nothing, and he would be scolded for spending a few more yuan of pocket money. I knew from that time that I had to be good to him in my life, and as long as it was within my ability, I would give him what he wanted. We separated when we were 15 years old, met again when we were 17 years old, and then we were together, and we were each other's first love. You remember the first time we worked together on a commercial, and I was with him at that time. ”

"This relationship didn't last long, and then because of a misunderstanding, they quarreled and separated, and the most inextricable time was when I chose to quit the circle. Everyone wondered why I, who had always been cheerful and hardworking, suddenly committed suicide by cutting my wrists due to depression. Cutting my wrists was real, and I can still see the scar on my wrist now, but not because of depression. I was desperate to get away from him, and that paranoia had reached the point of madness. cut his wrists, I wanted to separate from him, and at my house, in front of him, I took a knife and cut it down. ”

Because of this move, he chose to let go. You know what happened after that, I applied for a university in South Korea, went there alone, and then joined CL as a trainee. ”

"What happened in the middle is omitted. I married him suddenly, my grandmother had lip cancer the winter before last, and she wanted to see me get married and have someone to take care of before she went to the operating room. I bought a bottle of whiskey at the hospital, drank it all, and ran to the Yun building to find him, asking him if he could marry me and marry me. ”

So I went to get the marriage certificate the next day. I don't want to tell you this to show how anxious I was at that time, how panicked I was, or how unscrupulous I was to achieve my goals. At that time, when I thought of getting married, I only thought of him alone, although I was ...... Although it had reached the point of old age and death before, when they broke up, they also said that they would never see each other again in this life. But when it really came to get married, the only person who thought of him was him. At that time, I felt that my feelings for him might be much thicker than I had perceived. I never tell others about my marriage with him, I am talking about the result of free love and voluntary marriage. ”

"I didn't think I'd be separated from him. Instead, I would laugh out loud when I thought about being with him ten years from now, twenty years from now, thirty years from now, sixty years from now. I am with Yunxiu, of course, there are such and such objective reasons, but the most important thing is that I love him. ”

Pillow Xi moved his eyes to him, "Can you understand now, in my bones, I am a selfish and mean person, I will not force myself to give you a share of the love I gave to Yunxiu just because you like me." ”

"I won't be separated from him, and I won't die!"

"Ziquinoa, life is still long, life still has to live, don't predict your future. Your future, your future, and the rest of your life should not be limited to me, or even to love. The weather forecast can't accurately predict whether it will rain tomorrow, so how can you know what you're going to do in the future?"

"You're so young, and you're doing better than countless people in this world. In the future, you can be willful, if you like it, you will be with people, even if you don't like it, live high, you deserve to be admired. You will meet or have met a good girl in the future, she loves you enough, she will tolerate all your shortcomings and shortcomings, she will try to participate in your world, and she will take your joys, sorrows and sorrows as the focus and benchmark of life. Of course, the premise is that you also have to be good to people. ”

Pillow Xi touched his head again, "I hope you won't meet someone like me again." ”

"What if...... If we hadn't broken up four years ago, it would have been me with your name on the marriage certificate now, right?"

"There is no if!" Pillow Creek said firmly: "Zi Quinoa, there is no if! What happens is what happens, and what is past is what is past, you can look back, but you can't go back." People have to look forward. ”

Pillow Creek stood up and walked towards the door, finally thought about it, and said, "I will change the number, and you can also delete my contact information." ”

"Don't ...... Stop calling me and crying after getting drunk. ”

"In the future, don't drink because you're unhappy. You're only 22 years old, and there's a wider sea of stars waiting for you to explore, and that's when you can understand that I'm really, really, too small. ”

Pillow Creek closed the door for him. As soon as I went out, I saw a large number of people waiting next to me.

"I've said everything I need to say. She spoke, "Don't worry too much, it's nothing if it doesn't involve life and death." It's still young, and after a while, it's all right, and if you figure it out, it's fine. ”