My surname is Li and my name is Meng. When my mother gave birth to me, it was just before sunrise, and my father named me Li Meng.

My father was in the barracks most of the time, he was a soldier since he was a child, and he did not reach the "captain" until he was in his twenties, according to him, I am afraid that he will not be able to rise again in this life, unless there is a big war. But if there is a big war, the risk is too great, and he now has a wife and children, so he will not do it if he still works for the Hu people like before.

I remember it very early, when I was about three or four years old. I have two older sisters, who are not very good-looking, and the young sister's face is square and very dark, and my father is simply poured out of the same mold. My mother has been saving money in a small clay pot since my two sisters were born, and I once asked my mother what the money in that jar was going to do.

My mother sighed:

"Meng'er, don't complain about your mother's partiality. You are so good-looking, you will definitely not worry about not being able to marry a daughter-in-law in the future, but your two sisters, Da Nier is too tall and has dark skin, and Xiao Nier's face and your father are out of the same mold, I am afraid that it will be difficult to find a mother-in-law in the future. Mother now began to save dowries for them, and when she was fourteen or fifteen years old, if she really couldn't find her in-laws, she would give your two sisters a lot of money. ”

I couldn't help but laugh when I saw my mother so worried. They are my father's daughters, my sisters, and they are still worried that they will not be able to get married?

Speaking of my father, he is a legend in the township. My father's parents died early, and it was my cousin who raised my father, and later my father took the position of my cousin to become a soldier, and he actually mixed up in the barracks, and he also had a relationship with our Chu family, a big family in Jingnan.

Our house was the largest in the village, and everyone said that my father was very rich. In fact, all the money of my father was handed over to my mother at home, in fact, it is my mother who has the money.

My mother is very diligent, but because she keeps getting pregnant, my father hired two mothers-in-law to work at home. In our township, people like us don't have the habit of recruiting girls, and people will laugh at the laziness of the women in charge, but my father not only invited, but also invited two.

My father was in the barracks all day long, and others couldn't persuade my father, so they advised my mother to be diligent and thrifty. My mother is a weird temper, what others say, she likes to listen to it, and if she doesn't like to listen, she will fart as someone else. Therefore, countless people in the township said that my mother's limbs were not diligent and her grains were not separated, and my mother closed the door to take care of her life.

Then one year, my father didn't come home for four months, and the whole family was very upset.

In the barracks, there is a rest for two months, and a rest is four days, and every time I take a break, my father goes home, and there has never been an exception. If my father went out to do something, he would never hide it from the family, and if he didn't come back, something must have happened.

My mother went to the village gate every day to see it, and my two sisters and I waited at home.

My eldest sister asked me, "Did my dad die in battle?" Same as the father of the Niu family next door? ”

My little sister knocked on my big sister's hand and said unhappily, "Can Dad be the same as Ah Niu and his father next door?" His father can't do anything but beat women, and our father can knock down a cow! ”

I listened to the young lady's words and breathed a sigh of relief. Yes, my father has so much strength, his ability is high, and most importantly, he has us behind him, so he will definitely not let himself have an accident.

Sure enough, after another half a month, my father finally came back, but he lost a lot of weight. His mother asked him what was going on, and he said that he had gone far away to clean up the mob, and the mob he saw was actually a bunch of hungry people who had eaten from Yizi, and he really couldn't do it, so he resigned and came back.

My mother thinks my father is doing the right thing, but she is worried about the problem of eating for a family of five. It's a disaster year, and after a long drought, my family can have some food, all thanks to my father's salary in the barracks and a little oil and water from Uncle Chu. Now that my father is back, and the family has no land, what should I do?

At this time, I was five or six years old, knew a lot of words, and was reading the "Book of Songs". My dad was at home and happened to be teaching my two older sisters and me to read and write. Other people's daughters can't write, but my two sisters write very well, and my father never looks at what other people's families do, he only does what he wants. He thinks it's good to learn calligraphy, so our whole family learns calligraphy.

Except for my mother. My mother always felt that she didn't need to read so many books, and she didn't go out to show up. So I only learned to write my own name, and I didn't write it. My dad wasn't reluctant.

The first lesson my father taught me was "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you", but "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." There are thousands of people in this world, and if you don't like it, others like it. So even if you think it's good, don't necessarily let others feel good, just think it's good yourself.

I have remembered this truth for a lifetime, and then I made many friends, and we were able to become friends because I remembered this truth of my father.

Dad lived at home for more than a month, and we watched the grain change from one tael of silver and one stone to five taels of silver and one stone. A few years ago, grain could be bought for only 50 wen for one stone. Now it is the court of the Hu people, and the officials of the Hu people collected taxes last year and went to all our grain, but this year there is no grain in the fields, so we can only buy grain outside.

Ah Niu of the next door has been sold by his father, and he has two younger brothers, who are already thin and have lung disease, and his father and mother said that they can't support him, so it is better to sell him to someone else's house, so that he can still live. Then a man on a donkey bought him and was never seen again.

My mother's little clay pot is getting lighter day by day. When the clay pot was about to bottom, Uncle Chu came.

Later, my father followed Uncle Chu away, and Uncle Chu gave my family a large sum of money, even if the food was five taels, it was enough to eat for a year. My dad said he'd pick us up when he got outside. As soon as we have money, we will ask our fellow villagers to bring it back and tell us not to worry about not having food.

I knew that my father was worried that our family would also fall into the same way as Ah Niu's family next door, so he risked killing his head and followed Uncle Chu away.

My mother's little clay pot has money again, but my mother doesn't smile anymore.

The Central Plains rose everywhere, and many people went to join the army every day, and my father, as the first group to go, won the envy of many villagers. Everyone knows that the earlier the people who go to the road, the more trusted, Jingnan already has more than half of the Chu family, I heard that every time Uncle Chu captures a city, he opens a warehouse to release grain, and recruits soldiers, now there are very few people in Jingnan who starve to death, and every family has a few people to serve as soldiers, and the military salary is sent home, and there is always a little food to buy.

At this point, I had finished reading the Book of Songs and began to read the Analects. My father sent back two silver coins, both of which were carried in large baggage skins, and my mother's clay pot could not hold it at all. The mother began to worry again, because she didn't know where to put the money. Later, I thought about it and put it in the kitchen flue.

Although the family has money, my mother still lives like she had no money before. At this time, the grain price Tuochu family recovered the blessing of Jingnan, and it has stabilized at about three taels and one stone, but even so, the grain price is still very expensive. My mother buys very little grain every time, and she always buys a large part of coarse grains and a small part of fine noodles.

I know what Lu Daoniang is thinking, our family is old and weak, women and children, my uncle is still sick, and I suddenly have money at this time, I am afraid that I will bring trouble to the family. My mother raised three chickens, and the eggs were given to my sick uncle to replenish his body, and my grandmother and I ate grain and vegetables, and my mother used the rest to feed her stomach.

In short, life is not as good as before. In this world, you can't spend money even if you have it, it's really depressing.

My dad gradually became famous outside, some people said that my family was going to be developed, and some people said that my dad had married a little one outside, and he didn't want us anymore, my mother was still the same as before, living her life behind closed doors, anyway, she didn't let others see the jokes.

But at night, I could still hear my mother's choking voice. I'm a young son, and I haven't slept in a separate room with my mother until now, and because of this, some of my mother's small movements can't be hidden from me.

I don't know how to dismiss my mother, because my father has not heard from me for a long time. My father and Uncle Chu went to Jinju next door, and Aunt Chu's family is also a big family in Jinzhou, so it is easier to fight Jinju than other places.

Two chickens were stolen from my house that month, and someone secretly dropped torches in at night. My mother was frightened, but my uncle and his family couldn't look at it, so they asked us all to live in his house, which was reassuring.

My mother still kept the silver in the flue, and only brought the small clay pot.

In the summer of the second year, I heard that Jinju had been captured, and Jingnan and Jinju were leveled, and the rear was stable. My father sent a letter to the family, saying that when the autumn was over, he would pick us up and go to Jinyang.

My mother was happy for many days, and she pulled the cloth for the first time and began to make new clothes for us. My father is also a general now, and if we are still wearing sackcloth, I am afraid that it will be a disgrace to my father.

Before the clothes were finished, the cavalry of the Hu people entered the village.

They were a force that came back from the Western Regions, and after returning to the Central Plains, they found that the rear had been recovered by the Han Chinese, and they heard that it was a rebellion by the Jingnan elite soldiers led by my father and Uncle Chu, so they took a detour and came to the countryside to take revenge.

The Hu people were not prepared to stay alive, and slaughtered the city as soon as they entered the village. The men in the village had all defected to Uncle Chu and my father's army, and there was no strength to resist.

The Hu people were □□ and plundered everywhere in the village, and the family of the uncle took us to hide everywhere, and the house was so big, and we hid all the people inside and outside the house.

My mother and I were thrown into his well by my uncle, and it had dried up for a long time because of the drought, and we hid it on both sides, so that the people on it could not see that there was anyone inside. That night we hid in the well, listening to the screams, cries, and laughter outside, which was very piercing. I felt like my whole body was trembling, and my mother told me to block my ears, but I listened with my eyes wide open.

I knew that she was trying to listen, and she was afraid that there would be voices from her sister and her cousin's family.

The slaughter lasted a day, and it was not until midnight that the sound of horses' hooves gradually became inaudible, and we stayed up in the well all night until dawn to be sure that we were finally safe.

At noon, my cousin rescued us, but his face was ugly. My two sisters and uncle were searched out by Hu Bing, my uncle died on the spot, was chopped into pulp, and my two sisters committed suicide by hitting the wall.

Uncle Lobby's wife and children were all arrested, and no one left a whole body. The little cousin's family escaped because they were hiding in the cellar.

My mother fainted on the spot, and my grandmother had always used my uncle as a support, and when my uncle died, she also took advantage of the fact that others were not paying attention.

My family of five, plus my grandmother and uncle, a total of seven people, there were only three left in an instant.

The village can't stay any longer, and no one knows if the Lu Daohu people will come again. The survivors, led by my uncle, are ready to go to Jinyang to join my father.

Before defecting, all relatives should be buried. My two elder sisters were not allowed to be buried in the ancestral grave because they were not adults, but my mother insisted, and my cousin had to erect a tomb in the most remote place.

My mother buried the little clay pot full of money.

Before leaving, I sealed the door of my house with a wooden bar.

My future is out there, so I'm going outside. But the past I cherish is here, so I hope I can come back before I die. There is no future without the past, and I want to seal this room until then.

My dad once said that no matter what happens outside, as long as the home is still there, we will eventually have a place to go back. We wanted to keep our home, but we had to leave.

To nail one's past means to plunge into a treacherous future.

Previously I was the youngest child, and from today onwards I am the eldest son.

On the fourth day after the Hu people slaughtered the village, our trek towards Jinyang began.

The author has something to say: I woke up from a nap today, and when I saw my son and husband who were sleeping on the same back, I suddenly wanted to write an article for my chubby father.

But because I have been typing for a day today, my neck is sore, so I can only give up after typing more than 3,000 words. I'll make it up tomorrow. It doesn't affect the text, you can buy it or not, see how happy you are.