"Wow, with such a low attendance, you still say this movie will be good?" Zhao Yazhi looked at the sparse audience in the theater and couldn't help but ask in surprise.

"There are few people who watch it, it doesn't mean it's not good-looking, it's high and low." Xu Guanwu waved his hand and said, "You can see it later, this movie is definitely sincere." ”

"Ah Wu, is this film really that good?" Lin Qingxia asked suspiciously, "Looking at such a low attendance rate, it is indeed hard to imagine." ”

"Alas, I am saying in my heart that you don't believe a thousand things and ten thousand, but it is better to wait for the movie to start, you can enjoy it and know if what I said is right." Xu Guanwu said with a smile.

Zhao Yazhi and Lin Qingxia were skeptical, and after waiting for a while, the movie finally began to be screened.

Skipping the film company logo in front of you, when the movie really begins, the first thing is that a ferry boat appears in front of people, and the people on the boat carry chicken coops on their backs, and you can tell that they are chicken sellers at a glance.

The ferryboat brought the two men ashore and sailed immediately, while the two vendors carried their chicken coops into the woods, only to see them in front of them in a labyrinth of trees and smoke.

The two of them just want to enter the village and sell the chickens, but they don't know that there is a dead end ahead. It is the pig-like like butcher's house, one foot to find a way to die.

At this time, one of the vendors was in a hurry to urinate and went deep into the woods to relieve himself. Another peddler couldn't wait to explore the way, but suddenly saw a person squatting there, and hurriedly stepped forward to ask for the way. The man turned around, but startled the peddler to see him wearing a strange mask on his head and carrying a shiny butcher's knife in his hand.

The peddler thought that he had encountered a thief who had robbed, so he quickly turned around and ran, at this moment. Two more masked geeks appeared from behind. Wielding a butcher's knife at him is a flurry of slashes. And they seem to be crazy. Obviously, it was a chicken coop that was chopped, but he still slashed more than a dozen times in a row. And it just makes a weird sound, but can't say a whole sentence.

The peddler dodged for a while, but eventually died tragically under the butcher's knives of the three masked monsters, letting out a series of screams. His companion heard the sound and came to him, and was shocked to see his companion lying in a pool of blood. I was about to flee out, at this time. On all sides, four more masked monsters surrounded him, blocking him in the middle, and one by one they whined and screamed excitedly.

The naïve peddler thought he had met the robbers, so he wanted to give them the chickens, and he just wanted to save his life. But the masked monsters ignored him and continued to carry him towards the village.

Well, as soon as the screen switched, two blood-red characters of "slaughterhouse" were displayed, and then the hawker who was hacked to death was seen. and his companion, who was not dead, was dragged in by several masked geeks.

After entering the slaughterhouse. The masked monster lifted the dead vendor to the board like a dead pig, and threw the live chicken feathers they had brought into the pot alive without plucking out the internal organs, and then directly covered the pot.

"Wow, you're so cruel to chickens." Seeing this, the peddler said in surprise.

The men turned and pushed the peddler onto the board, and then chained his limbs, and he screamed so loudly that he muttered a strip of cloth on his mouth. The peddler felt that something was wrong, and was about to shout, but he saw the strange guest with a butcher's knife in his hand, and disemboweled, like a pig slaughtering a sheep, and carried out a piece of intestines.

"Gross!" Xu Guanwu was watching with relish, when he heard the sound of retching in his ears, and when he turned his head, he saw Zhao Yazhi covering her mouth with a handkerchief, constantly retching.

Xu Guanwu looked at the other side curiously, but saw Lin Qingxia covering her eyes with her hands, and she didn't dare to look at it.

"Qingxia, open your eyes, the beautiful ones are here." Xu Guanwu laughed quietly.

Lin Qingxia believed it, took her hands away, and opened her eyes, but she happened to see the scene of two masked monsters holding big saws in their hands, sawing the vendor who was not dead in half. Bloody, wailing, although it is a film from the 80s, the special effects have been done quite perfectly, and I can't tell that it is a drama at all.

"Gross!" Lin Qingxia couldn't stand it and began to retch.

Xu Guanwu continued to look down, only to see that the two vendors were cut into several pieces by the masked monster, and at this time, the chicken in the pot was also boiled. A masked geek let out a horrified laugh as he carried a dead, boiled chicken that had not yet been plucked.

Then a masked monster stood at the head of the wall and rang the gong, and the villagers immediately cheered when they heard it, "Wow, it's here again!" ”

A few people put on white cloths with "security guards" written on them, and then one person carried a thick bamboo stick, and everyone seemed to be beating a local tyrant to divide the fields, cheering and flocking to the "big hometown ancestral hall".

At this time, several masked monsters came over with small carts and cheering. When people saw it, they immediately cheered and rushed upward, and the people wearing the "security" armbands before them held bamboo sticks to block everyone and were responsible for maintaining law and order.

Just when the order was about to get out of control, they heard a loud shout, and everyone stood aside, looking at the people with a frightened face, but saw a person walking over with his hands behind his back, holding a bamboo stick, and knocking soundly.

Everyone showed a look of horror and flattery, and greeted respectfully, "Captain! ”

This person came to the top of the steps of the ancestral hall, and only then did he turn around, but he saw him with a beard and a majestic face, "How many goods did you buy this time?" ”

"There were two people in total, cut into thirty-nine pieces, and there were eight chickens." The subordinate replied.

"It's okay for two people, you can finally eat meat"

"It's been a long time since I've eaten meat, but it's great."

At the bottom of the steps, the villagers said happily.

"Thirty-nine pieces of meat, eight chickens, a total of 100 people in the village, the surname Li in the east, the surname Wang in the west, and the surname Zhang in the south, they should be divided into ......" An accountant held an abacus in his hand, and said with words in his mouth while dialing the abacus beads.

The captain single-handedly knocked over the account books and abacus in his hand, "your grandmother, this meat was obtained by our security team, and it should be distributed by our security team." I've decided that we're going to divide the security team with thirty dollars this time, and I'll get the remaining nine pieces for you individuals. ”

"Wow, that's not fair, you have so few people and you have thirty dollars. There are so many of us, but there are only nine dollars. Nine pieces is enough. ”

"It's not fair!"

The villagers in the audience shouted one by one.

"Unfair?! All right. These eight chickens will be given to you. The captain said, pointing to the eight dead chickens hanging next to him.

"How can you enjoy eating chicken!" A villager wailed.

"Alright. Well, the captain said how to divide it, and divide it as it is. At this time, a person dressed as a Taoist priest stood up and said, "But after everyone has eaten the meat, don't forget to come to the ancestral hall at night to overtake these dead souls." ”

……

"Gross!" Seeing these masked monsters killing these people, it turned out to be to eat human flesh. And these villagers were still addicted to life one by one, Zhao Yazhi and Lin Qingxia couldn't help but vomit again.

"Wow, what kind of movie is this, why is it so disgusting?" Zhao Yazhi couldn't help but vomit.

"Is this director Xu Ke psychopathic, making such a film?" Lin Qingxia also frowned and said, "Oh my God, it's only been more than ten minutes, and there are still more than an hour, I really can't stand it." ”

"Me too, Take. Why don't we stop watching and go home. Zhao Yazhi also said.

Xu Guanwu smiled. grabbed Lin Qingxia's hand with one hand, and grabbed Zhao Yazhi's hand with the other, "Don't go, the money has been spent, and then leave after reading." ”

Zhao Yazhi and Lin Qingxia struggled a few times, but they didn't break free of Xu Guanwu's hand, so they had to sit down with him again.

"Husband, why do you like watching this kind of movie?" Zhao Yazhi asked with a frown.

"It's pretty." Xu Guanwu smiled, "Don't you think? ”

"I think it's the hardest, the most ugly film in the world. The director who made this movie is psychopathic, and the audience who watches this movie is also ......," Lin Qingxia couldn't help but say.

"What?!" Xu Guanwu asked.

"Perverted." Zhao Yazhi added on the side.

Xu Guanwu was embarrassed, "Okay, since I am said to be perverted, then I will show you perverted." Saying that, Xu Guanwu opened his mouth wide and bit Lin Qingxia.

Lin Qingxia was startled, and hurriedly flashed to the side, but her hand was caught by Xu Guanwu, and before she could flash to the seat next to her, she was bitten on her wrist by Xu Guanwu, and a clear tooth mark was engraved.

"Humph! Nasty, get people wet. Lin Qingxia wiped the saliva on her wrist and said, "Look, what does it mean to have a tooth mark?" ”

"No, I'll give you a private special watch, the only one in the world." Xu Guanwu said with a smile.

Zhao Yazhi couldn't get used to the two flirting in front of her, so she couldn't help patting Xu Guanwu, "Okay, you two should be quiet, it's not good to disturb others watching the show." ”

Xu Guanwu nodded and said to Lin Qingxia, "Okay, obediently accompany me to watch this play, and we'll make trouble when we go home in the evening." ”

"But this movie is so scary, people will have nightmares at night after watching it." Lin Qingxia said timidly.

"It's okay, don't you have me with you at night?" Xu Guanwu smiled, "Look good, there will be something wonderful later." ”

Lin Qingxia was obedient, sat back in her seat, and continued to watch with Xu Guanwu.

……

At this time, the movie has already talked about two more people coming to the big hometown by boat, one of them fell into a trap and was hoisted high in a tree, and the other took the opportunity to snatch his money and swaggered into the village.

The person hanging from the tree is played by Xu Shaoqiang, he is still quite popular now, and as long as he makes money, he never picks a show, so the appearance rate is still quite high. In this film, he plays a central agent 999 who hunts down the ocean thief Rolex.

Just as he was trying to find a way to escape, at this time, several masked monsters surrounded him.

Lin Qingxia didn't dare to look any further, covered her eyes, muttered, and hid in Xu Guanwu's arms.

Xu Guanwu hugged her, but his eyes were still staring at the big screen, and he didn't notice Zhao Yazhi's jealous eyes on the side.

Nine Ninety-Nine is worthy of being the central secret agent, and with his good kung fu, he defeated the masked monster, and the mask monster also died under his own butcher's knife in a daze.

It is worth mentioning that between this fight, the masked monster still can't speak, but only makes all kinds of weird screams, with the butcher knife in his hand, and the mask on his face, as if the legend doesn't understand people's words, and only knows how to eat people.

After 999 got out of trouble, he came to his hometown. And the thief who entered the village before him ran into trouble.

As soon as he entered the village, he immediately attracted the attention of the villagers. In order to catch him and eat meat, the villagers used all kinds of means, such as covering their heads with sacks, such as sneak attacks, etc., but they were all dodged by mistake. But the actions of the villagers did not arouse his vigilance, only thinking that there were local thugs who wanted to rob his property, but he did not expect that they cared not about his money, but about his body of more than 100 catties of meat.

Bao Tie gallant entered the village and still did not change the problem of petty theft, smelled a vision from a family, immediately sneaked in, but met a very ugly woman, after seeing him, he immediately pounced on him like a nymphomaniac and picked up his pants, almost let him lose his chastity.

Xu Guanwu couldn't help laughing when he saw this, this fierce beauty dressed as a woman by the famous Hong Kong giant Xiao Jin is not inferior to the flowers that often appear in Zhou Xingchi's movies. And given that this is an 80-year-old movie, it is at least ten years earlier than Zhou Xingchi's "Like a Flower".

It can also be seen that Xu Ke's comedy talent is actually quite strong. (To be continued......)