The rain is not heavy, but there is a feeling that it will not end until the end of Shijie.

It seems that the heavens are also infected by the tears of the squad leader, and I want to mourn for the deceased Xiao Hei.

It is said that "it rains a lot during the Qingming Festival", and when life leaves, a rain as a farewell is very appropriate.

I vaguely remember that when my own puppy died of illness many years ago, the sky was very clear and hatefully blue. It wasn't until late at night, after I had secretly buried it in the community garden, that God stingily shed a few tears.

After that, my father and I had a long conversation, and he, a man who could not escape the emotional whirlpool of the past, had many unique views on life and death, and it can be said that he had reached the depth of a philosopher.

Now, my father used to comfort me, I can borrow flowers to offer Buddha, and say it to the class leader again.

"It doesn't matter if it's burial or cremation." I caught the squad leader's gaze and pointed to my chest, "Bingham Lampman said: The master's heart is the best place to bury the dog. ”

When my father comforted me with these words, I felt like I was empowered while expressing my deep approval.

Of course, I haven't found out who Bingham Lampman is, I can't figure it out now, I can't figure out who he didn't do anything except say this, similar to the current Weibo big V, who is famous for only making remarks.

The squad leader, who was walking along the rain-soaked side street with the same umbrella as me, raised his eyes slightly to look at me, as if surprised that I could say such philosophical words.

Because the pet hospital received a case of acute illness, a German black-backed chicken bone pierced the stomach pouch, and had to be operated on immediately, the squad leader only under my persuasion, left Xiao Hei's body to Xiao Ding to deal with, and walked outside with the umbrella I brought from home.

My original intention was to comfort the squad leader and send her home, but the squad leader wandered aimlessly and took me, the umbrella bearer, to an unfamiliar path, and she obviously didn't want to go home right away.

There are few pedestrians on the wet streets, but the air is relatively fresh, and the slippery pavement reflects the light of the street lamps, rendering the lonely night a little thicker.

The squad leader let out a low cry again, if I hadn't seen it with my own eyes, I really wouldn't believe that the squad leader, who was so strong and majestic on weekdays, would suddenly become a crying bag-like existence.

The night breeze blew the skirt of the class leader's uniform, and I tilted the umbrella a little in the direction of the class leader to prevent her from getting caught in the rain - it didn't matter to me, anyway, I was almost drenched by the time I ran.

What the? You say I might catch a cold if I don't take care of the rain? Don't be funny! Sparta's body is not so fragile!

"But......" After I comforted me a few words, the squad leader spoke up for the first time, "Xiao Hei has obviously overcome so many difficulties, and this time it will not survive......"

Alas, squad leader, you have committed what Buddhism calls "persistence", "as long as you insist on breathing, you can live a long life", the reason why human beings die, like Xiao Hei, is because sometimes they can't hold on anymore!

I recalled the strategy my father used to persuade me, and instead of answering the class leader's question head-on, I asked rhetorically:

"Squad leader, do you believe that there is a shijie after death?"

The squad leader shook his head, "My parents were atheists, and so did I. ”

Instead, I nodded, "That's right, if there is no shijie after death, then the dead Xiao Hei, the current state of existence is 'nothingness', which is an extremely beautiful haode realm, even better than the sweetest sleep." If you don't believe me, try to recall what it was like before you were born. ”

Such an unconventional statement made the squad leader's eyes widen in surprise, "You mean...... After death, because everything is gone, is it happier than the living? ”

Well, that's what my dad meant, and he also quoted a passage in the Tao Te Ching, that is, "I have a big patient, because I have a body, and I don't have a body, what trouble do I have?" ”

Translated from classical Chinese, it is: "If I have a body, I will have birth, old age, sickness and death, and I will have humiliation. ”

Of course, I can't say it directly to the squad leader in such a bookbag, so the squad leader should think I'm pretending to be a big-tailed wolf.

Without waiting for the squad leader to ask more questions, I continued:

"On the other hand, if you think that there is a shijie after death, then no matter what religious point of view, a sick puppy is not guilty, and it will inevitably go to heaven after death, go to bliss shijie, and maybe look at you from the clouds. In that case, why do you bother to let it see you so sad? ”

It may be that the last two sentences are more sensational, and while accepting my point of view, the squad leader snorted again and blocked his eyes with his hand.

"Ye Lin, you...... I've thought so much about life and death, I used to think you were too simple......"

In fact, it's not me who thinks about life and death, it's my father! I'm only 14 years old, weishenme thinks about shijie after hanging up every day! However, I was mistaken by the squad leader for a very deep thought, and that was also extremely haode.

The squad leader breathed in the cold air after the rain, and sighed faintly: "I don't see as much as you, I go to visit Xiao Hei every week, and I have developed a habit, and now I want to suddenly change the habit......"

Why shouldn't I? I would say that until now, whenever there are bones left on the dinner table, I have to think: should I take them home and give them to the puppy? Later, I realized that there were no more puppies at home, so there was only an indescribable emotion choked in my throat, and only a wry smile remained at the corner of my mouth.

If someone heard about the squad leader's situation, they might suggest that the squad leader get another healthy dog to forget about the pain, but I am not in a position to make such a suggestion.

No matter how healthy the dog is, the lifespan is only more than ten years, that is to say, after more than ten years, the squad leader will inevitably taste the pain of losing his dog again, and the longer he is together, the greater the pain, because it has become a habit to be together every day.

So my advice to the class leader is to ask her not to volunteer at the pet hospital in the future, find another hobby, or simply save the time for rest.

The squad leader was noncommittal, but asked me, "You probably like dogs, right?" ”

"It's okay," I tried to make myself look casual, "as long as it's not a barking and biting dog, I'll feed them a little bit of food when I have it." ”

"So, have you ever had a dog at home?"

I wanted to avoid answering the question of the squad leader, but now the person who needs to be comforted is the squad leader, and when I persuaded her to come out of the pet hospital, I also said that I had "experience in this area", so I sighed and told the squad leader that I had a dog at home, but the puppy died of illness.

I rarely talk about it to people, probably because they don't understand my state of mind. But for the squad leader at this time, I seemed to have finally found someone to confide in, and told the squad leader my heartfelt condolences and the details of my bare hands digging a pit in the community garden and burying the puppy.

Accidentally talking a little too much, I twisted my head away and blushed slightly.

"I see......," the squad leader nodded, "so that a lot of things can be explained." ”

The rain didn't fall heavily, but the squad leader seemed to be moving closer to me, and I felt that the distance between my mind was narrower because I knew that we had similar experiences.

At around half past eight, after a walk in the rain, I sent the squad leader home safely.

When the security door was opened, the squad leader's younger brother, Shu Zhe, was eating KFC takeout while watching TV in the living room, he didn't notice the sad expression on the squad leader's face at all, just glanced at it with his peripheral vision, and asked:

"Sister, where did you go after school today? You won't answer my phone! I was so hungry that I didn't have anything to eat, so I had to wait until now and order a takeout to eat! ”

"My sister has something to do today, so I'm coming back late." The squad leader said to his younger brother apologetically.

Shu Zhe's tone made me angry, I dodged into the door, greeted Shu Zhe first, startled him, and then said to him:

"Your sister has been taking care of the puppy in the pet hospital is sick and dead, your sister is sad, you are a big living person, what's the big deal to solve it yourself for dinner! You still complain to your sister! ”

Shu Zhe found that his sister's face was full of sorrow, but he had no love for animals at all, and he didn't understand his sister's behavior at all.

"Brother Ye Lin, and sister, are you there? It's just that an animal is dead, and it's not me who is dead, why are you so serious! If the animal dies, you can buy another one! ”

I was so angry that I rolled up my sleeves, pointed at Shu Zhe and asked the squad leader, "Can I beat him?" ”

If it weren't for the fact that the soles of my feet were very dirty and I hadn't changed my slippers, I would have gone directly to give Shu Zhe a few chestnut chisels without asking.

"Don't, Xiao Zhe didn't mean it," the squad leader stopped me, "Everyone's concept is different, Xiao Zhe just doesn't like animals very much." ”

Shu Zhe took advantage of the fact that I hadn't changed my slippers yet, and hid in his bedroom with a cigarette, and he didn't forget to take the unfinished KFC into the house.

He fled as fast as he could.

It dawned on me that since the class leader was going to the pet hospital directly after school, she probably hadn't eaten dinner yet.

"Squad leader, you haven't eaten, have you? Do you want me to go downstairs and buy something for you? ”

"No, no need, you've helped me a lot today, there are still noodles at home, I can eat a little by cooking it myself......"

Although the squad leader said this, but when I looked at her eyes, it was clear that there was still lingering sadness in it, who knows if the squad leader would go to bed without dinner after I left?

So I volunteered: "I'll cook the noodles too, if you don't dislike it, let me cook you an egg noodle - you're the main force of tomorrow's volleyball game, if you don't eat well and rest well, the duck will fly." ”

Before I rushed to the pet hospital, the squad leader had been crying for a long time, and the physical strength consumed by crying was much greater than expected, so the squad leader did look very tired, although she felt a little inappropriate, she thought about it and agreed to my suggestion with gratitude and curiosity.

Ah, I've finally fulfilled what I said many times earlier, "I'll give you something to eat", but today is the wrong occasion, I have to concentrate on cooking, and stop telling meat jokes.