"Do I understand? I don't understand at all? Mu Yan smiled to herself, with a melancholy expression.

Li Zilong stopped, turned around and looked at Mu Yan in a daze.

Mu Yan continued: "You have never given me any promises, and you have not even said that you like me, eight years for me is not wholeheartedly devoted to you, even if you have no promises, no confession, I am still willing to wait for you, and wait for you to return to me one day, because at that time I was full of you in my bones." I followed you to Jiangcheng, thinking that you would eventually return, but I couldn't wait for you after all, this is fate. ”

They passed by a park, and Mu Yan simply found a lawn to sit on. Li Zilong bent down and sat down across from her.

"You know, when I first entered the workplace, I was bullied, and every night I went back to my rental room, how I wished there was a warm embrace to hug and a shoulder to lend me to, but no; Do you know, I'm a girl, a girl who has reached marriageable age, a girl who will be affected by the surrounding environment, I can bear seven aunts and eight aunts, I can wait for you year after year without promises, but I will also be tired, you know, I have moved four times in less than a year, I have lived in five different houses, I am so poor, the thief still refuses to let me go, stealing my only valuable notebook. You know, I still wake up in the middle of the night. Mu Yan said and tears flowed unconsciously.

"I ask myself every day where are you? When will you be back? The first thing you will do when you come back is to marry me, and even once you called me drunk, I had to carefully test you, do you have anyone you like now. You never said that I would wait for you, but I am willing to wait for you, but I am also afraid, afraid that I will not be able to wait for you, afraid that liking you is just my own wishful thinking, afraid of making you feel pressured and making you feel that I am a burden. Mu Yan's tears were like a waterfall, the more she wiped them, the more she wiped them, she simply stopped wiping them, and her voice began to choke to the point that she couldn't speak.

The night was hazy, and he watched her bury her head in his knees and choked quietly, and all kinds of emotions welled up in his heart.

Silence, endless silence as deep as night.

Under the faint street lamps in the distance, the shadows of pedestrians are stretched long, and they are in a hurry, just like lonely souls, will every lonely soul find a habitat that makes him feel warm?

After Mu Yan's emotions calmed down, he spoke: "I'm sorry for keeping you waiting, maybe I was too selfish at the beginning." He looked at the crowd on the side of the road, his brows furrowed slightly: "Actually, I was sorry for you at that time, I lied to you, and you came to me that year, in fact, I was not going to graduate school, but preparing for studying abroad." ”

Mu Yan recalled that he was cooking outside with his classmates at that time, his computer was on for her to play casually, and there were many English speeches stored in that computer, she just thought it was his hobby at that time, and most of his books were also in English, and now it seems that he trusted him too much at that time, and he never doubted it. She was still lying on her knees, waiting for the next step.

"You know, I'm the only son in my family, and my parents invest almost all their money in me, and I don't want to disappoint them. How can you let me open my mouth and make a promise to you, do you want me to tell you that I want to study abroad for a few years, you wait for me. Of course, I also admit that I concealed the truth from you, and I was afraid that you would not wait for me if you thought I went abroad. He paused, and let out a long sigh.

"I was afraid that you would wait for me, but I was afraid that you would not wait for me, and I was afraid that you would wait for me, and in the end I would not be able to wait for the result. I'm not even sure of my own path, how dare I promise you, if you encounter a better miss than me, will you hold a grudge against me; What if I come back and you find out I'm not the right fit for you? Concealing you is my decision to be entangled for a long time, when I see you coming to me, I can't help but want to have you, I want you to wait for me, I said that I will go to graduate school, at least you will see the future, but if I say that I went abroad, I'm afraid you would have thought that we had no possibility, so I'm sorry, I was selfish at that time......"

There was silence again, except for the occasional sound of pedestrians on the road.

"But I don't understand." Li Zilong said a little helplessly: "You have been waiting for me for so long, I am also back, I even called you to say that I am coming back, but you left." In fact, the first thing I did when I came back from abroad was to go to you, because I had some follow-up things to deal with, so I called you in advance, you didn't tell me at that time that you had a boyfriend, if I'm not mistaken, you told me at that time that you were still alone......"

What he said was indeed right, she vaguely remembered that day he called her and told her that he was about to come back to find her, and where he would take her wherever he went in the future, he also tentatively asked her if she was still alone, after he arrived in Jiangcheng, could she take him in at home, she said welcome. She still remembers that day she hung up the phone and considered moving out of Qiao Hai's second bedroom, renting a one-bedroom and two-hall house, waiting for his return, and she didn't sleep all night.

The next morning, she told the good news to Qiao Hai, who had just gotten up and opened the bedroom door, and she was even moved to cry by her hard waiting in the past few years, and finally saw the moon. She didn't expect things to turn out like this.

Mu Yan was silent, she didn't know how to say this to him, and she even felt that she was being tricked by God. Did she tell him that she accidentally slept with her roommate?

The silence was still a long silence, Mu Yan wanted to get up and walk back.

"Do you love him? Is he good to you? Li Zilong suddenly seemed to think of something and asked.

"I don't know, I don't know, I just know that when it's cold, his stewed eggs are delicious, I just know that the snacks he bought me are delicious, I just know that with him, I don't have to worry about who will fix the lamp when it breaks...... Maybe I'm not good enough and independent enough to match you. Even God thinks I've climbed you high, so we're not destined to be together. ”

"Mu Yan, as long as you want, as long as you say you want, we can be together every minute, I don't care about everything else, I don't care if you have been married, I don't care how others look at us, whether I am a third party, whether I destroy other people's families, I have been waiting for you for so many years, and I have also thought about finding someone to marry at random, but I can't do it." What he said was so affectionate that Mu Yan's heart floated outside.

"But I care...... I care......" she hissed under her breath.