Several of us were shocked when we heard this, my legs weakened, I stumbled back two steps, and almost fell, Zhang Qingshan and Jiang Shijie hugged me.

The military advisor asked the doctor, "You just said it was possible, not necessarily, right?" ”

The doctor looked up at the military advisor and said helplessly, strictly speaking, except for a miracle, otherwise......

The doctor didn't say any more, and the advisor nodded, his face becoming solemn.

Half an hour later, I sat down on the steps outside the hospital building with the military advisor, I lit a cigarette, handed the cigarette and lighter in my hand to the military advisor, and the military advisor waved his hand and said, I don't smoke, my lungs are not good.

I smiled bitterly and pumped to myself, looking at the sun rising high in the distance, and felt a little dazzling for a while.

The military advisor lowered his head and blamed himself a little, I am mainly to blame for this matter......

I waved my hand at him and said, military advisor, don't say this, Brother Jiang is right, no one can blame this matter, if you want to blame me, you can only blame myself for my bad luck, five years, I spent five years to avenge this revenge, but I was defeated, not only failed to save my beloved, but also almost put my two dearest brothers into it.

Saying that, I took a few puffs of cigarettes, and said slowly: "Maybe it shouldn't be in life, you have to force it, even God can't see it, give you a hard blow, so that you can clearly understand what reality is." ”

The military advisor turned to look at me and said, victory and defeat are a common thing in soldiers.

I nodded and said, Actually, I've always thought so, but the loss caused by a defeat is too great, and I can say that once the people around me are implicated, I will really feel guilty about it.

The military advisor pushed down his glasses and said, success and fame, it is inevitable to have sacrifices, this is a normal thing, I believe Brother Long must have told you, he climbed from a shoemaker apprentice to the boss in the north of the city at the age of sixteen, and then to the station where the army was defeated later, I don't know how many brothers who died.

I lowered my head, bowed my body, at that moment, I looked extremely lonely, and said softly: "I understand the truth, but I have always felt that the purpose of making achievements is to make my family and friends around me better, if they all leave me in the process, then no matter how high I climb and how much I get, I'm afraid it will be meaningless." ”

After speaking, I smiled bitterly, looked up at the sky, my eyebrows were full of melancholy, and said slowly: "In life, if there is no one who can share the joy, how lonely it should be." ”

The military advisor pushed down his glasses, smiled bitterly, looked into the distance, and said slowly: "Yes, many people can't think about this." ”

Saying that, he sighed and said slowly: "It can only be said that everyone has their own ambitions, and everyone pursues differently." ”

A month later, Baoqiang has almost recovered because of his perverted physical fitness, but the doctor said that if he doesn't want to be disabled, it's best not to exercise vigorously within a year.

This also means that Baoqiang can't use any more effort within a year, and it will even have an impact in the future.

Baoqiang was so seriously injured, I have always blamed myself, but Baoqiangniang has always been reasonable, and did not say anything to blame me openly or secretly, but kept comforting me, saying that Baoqiang is in good health and will not take long to recover to before.

This made me feel very warm in my heart, and my guilt was reduced a lot.

As for Kuroko, both legs have been completely disabled, and he can only use a wheelchair, and his head, as the doctor said, has a mental disorder, which is the so-called dementia, and his expression will be exaggerated from time to time, always smirking for no reason, and his saliva can't be wiped clean all day long.

However, his eyes have become very pure, like a newborn child, seeing a flower, a butterfly, will laugh excitedly, happiness seems to have become extremely simple for him, no longer the previous look of loneliness, the face is always covered with a faint sadness sunspot.

After Kuroko recovered in the sanatorium for half a month, his parents took him away, saying that they wanted to go back to Kuroko's grandmother, and they didn't ask for money when I gave them money, saying that they didn't want money, just the healthy and happy son before.

When I asked them to go, I told me that I was going to drop them off, but they didn't tell me that they had already moved away when I went to Kuroko's house again.

I went to the old cow lived in the familiar with the building hole of the community, standing on the side of the road can see the familiar door of the big cow's house, I remember that there are tall waste products piled up outside the door, but now there is no more, the small shop has closed, the door is cleaned neatly, very clean, I asked the neighbors around why the scrap shop is closed, the neighbor said that because of the impact on the city, it has been banned more than a year ago, I want to leave some money for the big cow and his father, so I asked the neighbor where his father moved, The neighbors said they didn't know.

That day, I stood on the side of the road opposite the building cave for a long time, and in the past, after high school, it was me and Kuroko who ran over and stood here looking for the big cow, shouting the big cow, and the big cow smiled and waved out.

Unfortunately, now I am the only one left, and there is no only mess with memories, and the past has finally disappeared from my life forever and ever.

I ran to the gravestone of the big cow and hugged my head and cried, crying hoarsely, crying like a homeless child.

Now I'm the only one left, missing the two of us.

After a long time, I stood up, gently placed the two bullet casings in my hand in front of the monument of the big bull, and turned to leave.

The serious consequences of this defeat are huge for me, since the sunspot left for a long time I have been a little sluggish, I don't know whether what I have been insisting on is right or wrong, I even want to just accept my fate, hand over the position of the boss, and retire, and even want to give up the big white legs, and then I will find someone to marry, just make do with this life.

I couldn't help my emotions that day, so I ran over to find Brother Long, and told him all the anxiety and depression I had been in during this time, maybe no matter what status I reached and how mature I was, in front of Brother Long, I would always be able to take off my pretense defenselessly, and I would always be as unscrupulous as a child.

Brother Long also heard about me, and after listening to what I said, he turned his head to look at me, and said with a solemn face: "Xiaoyu, you have always regarded the ocean as an example for you to catch up, have you ever thought about what he would do if the ocean encountered this situation?" ”

I looked at him, and I stopped talking a little, and moved my throat slightly.

Brother Long smiled and said, "I can see it now, in fact, the reason why you want to give up is because you are afraid of failure, and you are afraid of affecting the people around you, but now the people around you seem to be all in one go, holding back their strength to avenge the sunspot, Baoqiang and the ocean, right?" But what are they going to do if you get deflated here? ”

I didn't know what to say for a while.

Brother Long looked at me and said very seriously: "Xiaoyu, you are a leader now, a leader should have the responsibility and responsibility that a leader should have, even if all the people around you have retreated, you have to persevere, because you are the spiritual pillar of your entire team, you can be defeated by the enemy again and again, you can lose a lot, but you can never be defeated by your own fear." ”

I clenched my fists tightly and didn't speak.

Brother Long patted me lightly on the shoulder and said, "Xiaoyu, go back and think about it, I still say the same thing, how you choose, it's your own business, you have to take responsibility for the consequences, life is not easy, let alone success?" ”

I nodded, my eyes becoming determined.

It took me a week to regain my confidence and reorganize what I wanted to do next.

No matter how I plan, I feel that I am too weak, especially after hurting Baoqiang and damaging the sunspot, I urgently need help.

That day, I found the military advisor and told me that I was ready to fight the Li family again.

The military advisor smiled and said, what's the matter, the mentality has been adjusted?

I nodded, smiled, and said, okay.

The military advisor shook his head with a smile and said, "I've been waiting for that Xiaoyu to come back for a long time."

As he spoke, he asked me what I was going to do next.

I smiled and said, after thinking about it for a long time, I decided to go to Shanxi again.