I stopped being a virgin early on, which made me feel inferior to myself when I was still traditional in my bones.

And my ** way makes me feel indescribable shame when I think about it in the days to come.

My first time, one night shortly after my college entrance examination, caught me off guard and regretted it.

That night, for some particularly embarrassing reason, I ran out of the house in disheveled clothes and unkempt like a frightened bird, and ran all over the streets.

Seeing that the night was getting thicker and darker and there was nowhere to go, I pinched the IC phone card that I turned out of my pocket, stood in the phone booth at the corner of the street, and thought about it for a while, and finally made up my mind to call Lu Zhou, a male classmate sitting diagonally across from me.

In the three years of high school, due to family reasons, I had some low self-esteem, I was not good at words and communication, and few classmates were willing to take care of me. But Lu Zhou is very good, he often takes the initiative to talk to me, and after the college entrance examination, he left me his mobile phone number, so that I can contact me more. And I am determined to find him now, in addition to only knowing him, but also because I know that his family conditions are good and he has money to spare.

When the bell rang, my heart was very hesitant, but fortunately, when the bell was about to end, Lu Zhou picked up the phone.

The college entrance examination has ended, he may go out to entertain and relax, anyway, he is noisy over there, after knowing that it is me, he changed to a quiet environment to talk to me on the phone, I was grinding and chattering a few words, before I was embarrassed to turn the conversation to the topic, saying that I wanted to borrow a hundred yuan from him for emergency.

Lu Zhou asked me what I was doing with the money, and I couldn't make up any other reason for a while, so I had to directly say that I didn't have a place to stay tonight, so I borrowed money to rent a hotel.

It's quite refreshing, Lu Zhou said that his cousin had just fallen out of love and ran back to his hometown to heal his emotional injuries, he accompanied his cousin to sing at Haodi KTV, he couldn't leave for the time being, and if I wanted to borrow money, I would go to KTV to find him.

I went to the door of Haodi KTV, Lu Zhou was already waiting there, he said that it was too late and I was not safe as a girl, so he accompanied me to rent a hotel first.

Who knew that we were looking all the way down the street next to it, and every hotel required an ID card to open a room, and I came out in such a hurry that I didn't bring it at all.

At the hotel at the end of the street, I hesitated for a while, and asked Lu Zhou to lend me fifteen yuan, and I went to the Internet café to buy an all-nighter and make do with it for one night.

But Lu Zhou disagreed, saying that the college entrance examination had just been completed in the past few days, and the Internet café was crowded, and it was not safe for me to go all night as a girl.

We walked around in front of the hotel for a few more minutes, and Lu Zhou asked me if I could follow him to KTV for a while, and when his cousin had finished singing, he would go home and get his ID card to help me open the room.

I see that Lu Zhou would rather hang his cousin who has just fallen out of love than come to take me to find a place to live, and now that he is so enthusiastic to give me ideas, I am grateful for the ups and downs of the world just now, and I don't know how to say anything to get rid of his kindness, so I have to nod.

When I followed Lu Zhou back, I could see the beautiful starry sky in summer when I looked up, and I had some warmth in my heart, and I thought that in a few days I would go to find out if the supermarket wanted a promoter, and strive to pay Lu Zhou back as soon as possible.

But what I didn't expect was that this night was not very quiet for me, and the little warmth it brought to me was not enough to offset the cold that followed, it not only succeeded in kicking my dying youth hard, but also brought me an indelible mark, which became the most faint pain in my memory and the unforgettable that I didn't want to be mentioned.

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