Give you my heart as a memorial / This love / Any moment you open it is fresh / With me by your side / How bitter it is turned into sweet / Open your eyes and see forever / Give me your heart as a memorial / My dream / With your blessing to be able to be complete / No matter how big the wind and waves are, I will move forward bravely

- "Youth Commemorative Book"

That year, the song "Youth Memorial Book" was sung on the streets and alleys, and it was also a must-have song for campus radio after class.

After the reunion, between classes, Ye Xiangqian often ran to the window of Niansheng's classroom, waved his hand, and called her name with a big grin.

Although the big city is more open than the countryside, the relationship between a boy and a girl, no matter what time and place it is, makes people think about it.

Niansheng only knew that he was very happy to talk about childhood fun with Agui, so he didn't pay attention to the strange eyes of others.

Occasionally, on weekends, Agui will take her around, old alleys, courtyards, and former residences of celebrities.

The words taken from the books in my mind collide with the real scenes, and the knowledge suddenly becomes vivid.

Nian Sheng thought, "Read 10,000 books, travel 10,000 miles" really makes sense.

Song Zexi and Yin Shiyu haven't seen each other for a while, from Agui's words, Niansheng probably knows some things about Yin Shiyu, his family is very good, his parents are spoiled, in short, he is a teenager who does not touch the spring water and does not eat fireworks in the world.

One of Agui's original words is: When the rain is still young, his mother won't let him take the bus and go to the cinema, saying that it is unhygienic and dirty.

It wasn't until she met Xiaoxue, a very good child to be born, that she realized that some people seem gorgeous on the surface, but their hearts are already full of devastation.

The first time I saw Xiaoxue, Niansheng's heart was deeply stabbed.

At that time, Xiaoxue, with messy hair and blood at the corners of her mouth, was curled up in the alley.

Niansheng passed, walked a distance, turned back, nudged her shoulder from behind, and asked, "Are you okay?" ”

Who knew that she suddenly turned around, pushed Nian Sheng, hysterical, and yelled: "Didn't I let you beat me to death?!" ”

Nian Sheng was stunned, his heart was mixed, but his voice was extremely calm, and he said: "Some people beg to live, but you want to die, if you can exchange, are you willing?" ”

Later, Xiaoxue often thought of this moment, and felt that Niansheng was really stupid, and sat with her from dawn until dark, if at that time, Niansheng directly yelled at her for a nervous disorder, and then walked away, there would be no follow-up between them.

In fact, that day, Niansheng sat in the alley and didn't leave, partly because she didn't want to go back and see the picture of Song Yishu teaching Zeguan to play Go, which was the most common way for her to communicate with her father.

Thinking about a person, that person, but not in any corner of the world, that feeling is like playing hide and seek, hiding in a small space for a long time, not being found, and not daring to breathe loudly.

Niansheng is not afraid of death, but he is very afraid, and he can't be found anywhere.

Nian Sheng looked at the thin and slender girl in front of him, and had an urge to protect her. Even if she is willing to exchange, Nian Sheng will not agree, we are not monkeys bursting out of the stone, life is never our own, how can it be child's play.

When it was dark, Niansheng got up, patted the dust on her buttocks, and was about to leave, when a pair of knuckled hands suddenly grabbed the corners of her clothes tightly and said, "Everyone abandoned me." ”

Niansheng's palms were painful, and when he heard this sentence that he never dared to admit, he was distressed and aggrieved, squatted down, and hugged her. Presumably, Niansheng is also happy, and the girl said this to share her story.

So, Nian Sheng said to her, "I understand. ”

Xiaoxue also felt incredible, what kind of person she was, cold, selfish, stubborn and rebellious, and extremely repulsive to the closeness of others. However, being embraced at this moment, it is as if you are on the green grass, looking up at the blue sky, and the faint warmth of white clouds.

There is a kind of eye edge, that is, the first time we meet, which makes people feel comfortable and cordial, and the whole person becomes gentle unintentionally.

I get it.

Since he was a child, he didn't have a mother, and his father left in a hurry, and even the love that he hadn't understood was lost with the departure of that person.

The heart is warm and the world is gray / Sometimes the lonely need another kind / Love is received and given to us is not perfect/ Dreams are broken and we have a few chances / to chase

——Stefanie Sun, "The Same Kind"

2003, 24 December, Christmas Eve.

Xiaoxue took Niansheng's hand and walked around the street.

The two of them shuttled through a dazzling array of stores, and Niansheng, at the instigation of Xiaoxue, tried on one after another, brand-name clothes that she had never heard of.

The waiter's suspicious and surprised eyes made Niansheng feel a little embarrassed, and he wanted to escape several times, but he was forced back by Xiaoxue. According to Xiaoxue, you have to dare to try when you are young. But Xiaoxue hasn't tried one herself.

After visiting a few houses, Niansheng resolutely resisted, adding the sentence "dare to try when you are young" in front of the word "clothes".

The trees on the side of the street were full of lanterns, and the girl's thumb was bent, and her four fingers were facing the sky, and she smiled brightly, saying, "Okay, I won't force you!" You stand here and don't move, I'll come when I go. ”

Xiaoxue ran mysteriously across the street, and after a while, disappeared around the corner.

Xiaoxue is really good-looking, different from the beauty of ordinary girls, but like her character, she acts arbitrarily. Nian Shengxiao is really terrible enough to describe. Many years later, thinking about it, Xiaoxue is really like Meng Kerou played by Gui Lunmei in "Blue Gate".

I don't know when, Xiaoxue has already run back, still a little out of breath, and asks, "What are you smirking at?" ”

Niansheng shook his head and saw that Xiaoxue had an extra white shopping bag in his hand, with English letters reflected on it, and Niansheng remembered that Xiaoxue and she had just gone there to try on clothes.

"Give." Xiaoxue handed the bag to Nian Sheng, her expression was nervous and shy.

Taken, opened, a simple white dress. Niansheng probably guessed it, but she was still a little surprised, and the indescribable urge to cry, Xiaoxue actually saw her liking for that skirt, and she clearly concealed it very well.

Nian Sheng suppressed the fluctuating emotions, handed the bag back to Xiaoxue, and said, "I can't ask for such a valuable thing." ”

Xiaoxue stopped, her eyes sank, she didn't answer, her voice was cold, and she said, "If you don't let me die, you have to help me spend money together." ”

Niansheng knew that Xiaoxue's parents would send a large amount of money to Xiaoxue's card every month, and even so, it couldn't hide the fact that they abandoned Xiaoxue.

When Xiaoxue was 8 years old, a feng shui gentleman came to the family, saying that Xiaoxue was an ominous person who would harm the whole family and must be sent away. How sad and hateful, ominous, scourge, this curse-like felony, oppresses people who do not even have a chance to resist.

Xiaoxue was sent to a mother-in-law who had served her family for three generations, and her mother-in-law treated her well.

There are certain emotions that can be missing, which cannot be made up by others; The wounds and scars have faded, but they still have a dull pain inadvertently.

On the day Niansheng saw Xiaoxue for the first time, the reason why she was so sad was because her mother-in-law was leaving her, and her mother-in-law was going to live abroad with her children and grandchildren.

"I still can't ask for it." Niansheng also has his own stubborn persistence.

Xiaoxue lowered her head, stared at her toes, and her voice was slightly aggrieved: "This is a gift for Christmas Eve." ”

"Xiaoxue, it's good to have you."

Xiaoxue, it's good to have you.

Tonight, Lin Zisheng and Song Yishu took Song Zeguan to a Western restaurant for dinner, obviously they said that they didn't have an appointment with their classmates, why are they still inexplicably disappointed.

Xiaoxue looked up and smiled.

Niansheng also smiled.

What Niansheng didn't expect was that he would bump into Ye Xiangqian in the crowd on the street, and the two of them looked at each other.

It's Xiaoxue, like a nobody.

As for why Niansheng and Agui are so embarrassed, time has to go back half a month ago, at that time, Agui took a fancy to a girl at the same level, and in order to chase her, he almost didn't go to Niansheng anymore.

Niansheng didn't blame Agui for forgetting his friends, but Agui walked to her classroom one time, insisted on introducing his girlfriend to Niansheng, and asked the three of them to climb the mountain together.

Niansheng was embarrassed to make a light bulb, and she was a 'newlywed Yan'er', but if she didn't go, she was afraid that Agui would mistakenly think she was angry.

It happened that Xiaoxue was free on Saturday, so Niansheng took Xiaoxue to the appointment.

Agui's girlfriend is a pampered master, while climbing, shouting hot and tired, Agui is helping to fan the cool and waiting to drink water.

Niansheng was dumbfounded, thinking that back then, Agui was the leader of the friends in the village, not to mention how spirited he was.

Agui's girlfriend has a soft voice and loves to talk, especially at the beginning, she loves to talk to Xiaoxue. But Xiaoxue didn't pay much attention to her.

Ah Gui's girlfriend felt that her hot face was sticking to someone's cold buttocks, and she was unhappy, so she turned to talk to Niansheng.

Nian Sheng couldn't say a few words with people who were not on the same frequency, and it took a lot of hard work to squeeze out a few words that were as boring as chatting.

Ah Gui's girlfriend shook Ah Gui's hand and complained, "Forward, it's so boring with them!" Let's stop climbing, let's go down! Well? ”

Agui hurriedly comforted: "Good, it's good to be a good person, and you have something to say when you are familiar!" Go to the top of the mountain, get to the top of the mountain and you'll talk! ”

I don't know how reluctant Agui said, anyway, Niansheng is extremely embarrassed.

Ah Gui's girlfriend didn't give up, and was still muttering on the side: "Hey, you see how dirty she is, what is there to say." ”

Although Ye Xiangqian is usually accustomed to his girlfriend's directness, at this moment, he also feels quite harsh. Nian Sheng was petrified on the spot.

Xiaoxue, who didn't say anything all the way, had long seen that Agui's girlfriend was unpleasant, and when she heard this, she raised her hand and gave her a slap, and then, like a storm, pulled Niansheng down the mountain.

Since then, Niansheng and Agui have not met again.

Ah Gui spoke: "What a coincidence! Shopping? ”

Nian Sheng replied: "Yes, what a coincidence! ”

The crowd was very lively, and there was silence here.

Agui scratched his head, smiled a little reluctantly, and said, "I broke up with her." I'm so sorry about what happened last time. ”

Nian Sheng hurriedly said: "It's true that I'm embarrassed, and also, it caused you to break up." ”

Nian Sheng lowered his head, like a schoolboy who had done something wrong.

Ah Gui pulled his mouth away and smiled: "Alas, there will always be a breakup, it's none of your business." ”

Then he said: "That's right, I'm going to sing K with Zexi and them later, let's go together!" ”

Niansheng hesitated and shook his head: "No, I'm going to go around with Xiaoxue." ”

After saying goodbye to Agui, Nian Sheng looked at Xiao Xue, who was standing next to him and had not spoken, and his whole person was cold and cold.

Niansheng took Xiaoxue's hand and said, "Why don't the two of us go and sing?" ”

Xiaoxue felt that although Niansheng's hand was slender, it was warm and comfortable to hold, and her eyes instantly turned from dim to bright, and said, "Okay! ”

Xiaoxue is one year younger than Niansheng, but she is much more familiar with things than her. Although it was Nian Sheng's idea, later, it was Xiaoxue who pulled her, turned left and right, and arrived in front of a KTV, 1798 music KTV.

City B is very big and there are many people, and Nian Sheng and Yin Shiyu still met by chance.

The boy wore a white shirt with a thick dark blue coat and his hands in his pockets.

The sky began to drizzle intermittently again, falling overhead, with only a slight touch.

The high-pole lamp on the side of the road, the light is evenly struck, and the young man's jade-like face is snow-white.

Nian Sheng sighed, not even a reason to call him by name. She and he have only met twice.

For the first time, he thought, she asked for his umbrella.

The second time, she gave him an umbrella, but he didn't want it.

Nian Sheng smiled, it was really a cool fate.

When Nian Sheng saw him, he couldn't say hello; And in his eyes, there is no her at all.

Zexi, who walked to Shi Yu from another direction, saw Niansheng not far away, Zexi smiled at her, and smiled just right.

However, his expression gradually changed as if he saw Xiaoxue beside Nian Sheng.

The young man also noticed something unusual, and with Zexi's gaze, his emotionless face suddenly became vivid.

At this time, Nian Sheng was suddenly dragged inside by Xiaoxue and said, "Let's go, let's go, what's so beautiful." ”

That night, the singing lingered, each with their own hearts, and after all, the song ended.