The third time I met L, about a Sunday daylight.

L tried to avoid returning late, so he had to find an excuse to come out and have a private meeting with me during the day, so that there would be more time than at night. I don't have any problem either, I'm glad to see him anyway - I really miss him, not to sleep with him, but to miss his doting arms.

I received a call from L before work on Friday, and it was only at this time that the time and place of the meeting the day after tomorrow were finally decided (his schedule was so full that it was hard to say even if he made an appointment a week in advance), and he would drive to pick me up. I knew Saturday was his daughter's birthday, and he would definitely not be able to contact me tomorrow, so I called on Friday.

"What do you have for tomorrow?" He asked me.

"You have to take care of it!" I said to him. Obviously, you have your own arrangements, and you have to come to ask me about my private affairs.

"yes, you have so many boyfriends, who knows which date you're going to go on?" L smacks his ass.

Sometimes, even if you like each other very much, you have to keep a little mystery and freshness, don't wait all day long to be summoned like a poor palace maid, or just turn around the emperor and make people feel that they have already eaten you. A man's desire to conquer is a necessary condition for him to love you, of course, you have to grasp the degree, too much.

I'm not a lover with a lot of means and scheming, I'm just an ordinary female lover who knows some love rules and men's psychology.

"I miss you so much." I deliberately said it to make him happy.

He was indeed secretly happy, and he could hear it in his tone, but he was still pretending to be in the middle of his words: "Oh, that's it. "I'm thinking why L doesn't go to play a domestic idiot idol drama, and the male protagonists in it are all like these unsung dicks who think they are handsome with their hands in their trouser pockets.

On Saturday, I asked Xiao M to go to my nails together, I wiped my body lotion a day in advance, shaved my armpit hair, and thought about wearing a new set of underwear tomorrow, and a smile unconsciously appeared on the corner of my mouth. The little M next door gave me a slap in the face:

"You giggle softly and sweetly, what do you think!"

I just looked down at my nails, which were already stained with Kodan.

On Saturday night, just as I was struggling with what to wear for the next day's date, I got a call from L.

"Tomorrow a reception is suddenly arranged," he announced helplessly, "from morning till night." ”

I was disappointed, but I quickly adjusted and reassured him, "It's okay, then let's make another appointment next time!" ”

L added, "I have a cold." ”

I snickered, and he was like a child in front of me.

"Actually, I really want to see you." I whispered with a red face.

"Why don't you go on a business trip with me next Wednesday through Friday?" L had a whim.

"Where can I go!" I hated him, "Besides, you're so busy on a business trip, and I still can't see you when I go." ”

"I can lie to the company that I'm on a weekend so we can spend two days together."

"Hey, you're a professional manager, don't pretend to be a public servant." I smiled and counted him down, and my heart was actually quite sweet.

"Really, why don't you rush to X City after work next Friday, it's just more than two hours to take the high-speed rail, we will spend the weekend together, and I will reimburse you for the travel expenses."

In the end, I politely declined. On the one hand, if you don't want to toss, both sides will be tired and out of mood; On the other hand, I don't want to do a pole deal - let the man learn to wait, at this time it is beneficial for the woman.

L said disappointedly: "Then I have to make another appointment next time." ”

"Well, take care of your body and recover soon." I say.

"Next time I take you to the beach," L said slightly apologetically, "I know of a nice hotel with a sea view and a good place to eat." ”

I hung up the phone, and although I was no-shown, I was still very happy. I don't insist that the all-enannient L must see me for as long as he wants, I just need to be satisfied knowing that he will miss me, value me, and be willing to give me time in any way he can. In fact, a woman is a creature who is easily contented, as long as she learns to be reasonable.

Even I don't need to believe that he loves me. I don't say I love him.

At this time, our relationship is a young couple who rely on the strong attraction of the body and fall into blind love. I also wonder if this relationship can slowly fade when we get tired of each other's flesh, so that I can quietly withdraw without hurting anyone.

When you fall in love with a busy married person, maybe resistance is always necessary.

The third meeting with L was delayed again and again, and although both parties tried hard to find an opportunity, they always failed to make the trip. After almost a month, it finally seemed that we could meet again, and I couldn't hold back my excitement, and L seemed to have prepared a little surprise and gift for me, but then I received a phone call: my mother was coming to see me.

My mother came and stayed for two weeks.

When I go to work, she buys groceries and cooks, and I accompany her to the park on Saturdays and Sundays. To be honest, I miss my mom a lot, and her cooking skills will always be a source of happiness for me. But most of the past two weeks I've been thinking about L, as if I've lost my soul, and I can't let my mom notice. Whenever she asks me about the sensitive topic of finding a boyfriend, I feel highly nervous and always immediately find a way to talk about it.

"Mom, Xiao M said that she would invite us to dinner tonight, you haven't seen her yet, I'd better be a sister."

"What is she doing? How old is it? Is there a target? ”

Then she began to teach me not to mix with older single young women, but to have more contact with married colleagues, colleagues and friends, which helped me introduce suitable boys.

I hurriedly served her vegetables and told her that I was working smoothly and that I was very important to the leader.

L knew about this situation, and called me at noon two days, tired of it for a while, and then told me not to work too hard. I laughed at him: How hard can I have when my mother comes! Since it's all weekdays, the call is brief. Actually, there wasn't much to say, he didn't know anything about my family situation. Our communication is limited to when we can see each other again.

It was only after my mother went to bed every night that I felt a little lighter. During the time my mother came to live, I was lazy and became a shopkeeper, and she took care of me meticulously, but I felt huge psychological pressure. I can't talk to L – after work and on weekends, it's a "no-go" time to contact him. When he goes to work, he's very busy, and I can't talk about these things.

In fact, L once told me that he wanted me to talk to him about any troubles, and I laughed at him for "finding a sense of existence". I wouldn't do that, because I knew that my relationship with him was the source of my deepest distress.

Not being able to share the pressure and pain of the other party is the same for me and for L. However, the most painful thing in the world is that when you feel anxious, you can't send even a single message to the person you like. I'm very sensible and considerate, but sometimes I feel quite pathetic. But so what? Originally, the relationship between me and L was simply maintained under the egoistic chain of "sharing happiness and hardship". Especially for me, it's an identity that doesn't have the right to have a shadow of emotions.

One day at dinner, I was staring blankly at my phone again, with a dark screen, lying quietly on the table, unable to tell what I missed, not knowing what to do with it.

My mom looked at me with concern and asked, "Yanyan (my nickname), are you too tired?" ”

"No...... "I haven't recovered yet."

"Why do you feel like you're not doing anything," my mom seemed to complain a little, "I don't know what you've been thinking about all day, is it because you've been feeling unwell lately?" ”

I hurriedly took a bite of food and said with a smile: "I'm in good health!" You see, I'm going to gain weight again when you come. ”

"Fat what fat! You see, you're almost skinny. My mom brought me another bowl of soup and continued to watch me eat with a smile.

I suddenly wanted to cry, so I quickly picked up the bowl and turned my face to the other side.

I can't ever give her peace of mind.

Why can't I find a good boy, take it home and show her, give her a chance to say, "Please take care of my daughter for me".

L won't be the star of my life, but I can't tell how long the comet will stay in my sky, or if it will crash and smash me to pieces. We will not achieve peaceful happiness as simply and simply as my parents, even an ordinary text message asking for warmth, it can't be sent.

During the day, my heart is entangled, but after night, I still can't stop thinking about L.

I don't know if it's because of my mother's warm care that makes me feel more lonely, and my tears have been very low recently, and I especially want to see L, I want to get into his arms and hug him, I want to swallow his every kiss alone, and I want to entangle with him like crazy to make up for the gap in my heart.

Missing is a very mysterious thing, like a shadow, silent and silent haunting in the bottom of my heart, engulfing me in silence in the blink of an eye, I am powerless to resist, especially at night.

I miss you so much that I can't breathe, and I can't wait to run towards you at once, and tell you out loud:

I am willing to forget my name for you, even if I stay in your arms for one more second, it is not a pity to lose the world;

I am willing to be banished to the sky for you, as long as you truly respond with love, and will do anything, for you.

The lyrics of this song are very good for how I felt at the time.

I lay in bed listening to the song, quietly wept, and fell asleep.